I am an entire day late. Nine months my large, bloated ass! I tried everything to get these babies out of me. I jumped around so much I had to pee without looking at water, I ate spicy foods that burnt little white patches into my tongue, we've had sex. If you can call it that. I wouldn't, I got no satisfaction what-so-ever. First of all no one can do it if the other person is holding himself up so high that he can hardly push in, because of a nine month, two person pregnancy bump. I sure as hell was not going to do it the other way and crush Harry to death. Then Harry got all angry when I suggested that he lean on my stomach and see if we can just shoot one right on out of me.

Then I was reading something and this woman was walking around her kitchen, and the baby fell out of her! She didn't even know she was in labor and the baby fell into a clothes basket or something. How do you not know you're in labor? I saw Hermione and there was no way that someone could not know their uterus was expanding so that they could push a baby out. Like was she pushing and not knowing it? Maybe she was like clenching or something.

I would totally love to have that happen. To just be lying in bed reading a glossy and then have Harry run in and say that there was a baby hanging out of my cooch. Then I would calmly lift my dress up and he would take it out and we would eat dinner and then the other one would slide out peacefully.

That is how having a baby should be. There would be no bloating and lack of bladder control. Vomiting would not be an option because in Ginny World, women have babies with the most convenience possible. You want to got out dancing, get a manni, then come home and lay down on the couch and have a baby with no pain, no mess, no time? In Ginny World that is what happens.

But oh no! In this world, women are in unbelievable pain for undetermined amounts of time. There is this big, gross mess and you bleed and have all this awful gunk come out of you. Then you have to push the baby out of you. That in itself is why I wish the stork was real. I would just call a number and the stork would show up in three to five business days.

Instead I am squished into my bed, the pillows curved into my back, waiting for Harry to come and walk me to the bathroom. I am so hopeless! I hate having to be dependant on someone and now I cant even get off the toilet on my own. It is so stupid.

I was lying there waiting impatiently for Harry. I needed my book out of the bathroom because this one I was reading was scaring me. I don't like to read about women whose babies fall out of nowhere.

After ten minutes I was cursing him when I felt a small gush and warmth pool around me. I looked down in annoyance. Did I pee on myself?

"Harry!" I bellowed now angry and humiliated. "I'm calling you!"

A minute Harry appeared looking flustered and worried.

"Sorry I got side tracked so I put a tape on and those things you put in your ears," Harry began like I was stupid.

"Earphones?" I suggested moodily.

"Yeah and I paused the tape for a second and I heard you calling my name and I ran into the room. What's up?" Harry asked still sounding out of breath.

"Well I wet myself," I said blushing. Harry paused and looked at me weirdly.

"I wont tell anyone," Harry said awkwardly.

I was about to answer when something clicked. I didn't have to pee, and I usually know when I have to pee. It could have been the fact that I am a real genius, or the contraction that seized my body, but I figured out I was in labor.

I gulped and then looked at Harry through the blur in my eyes.

"Ouch," I hissed and clutched onto my stomach until the pain evaporated. "I think I'm in labor."

Harry stared at me for a moment and then flipped out. He ran from the room and I had a horrible thought that he ran out, but he returned minutes later carrying a book.

"Did your water break?" Harry asked reading from the book.

"Yes," I snapped trying to heave myself up.

"Did you have a contraction?" Harry asked looking up at me.

"Either that or the worst cramp known to women kind," I snarled. "Harry please I am so scared I need to you to come back to reality and help me!"

Harry watched me for a moment, took a calming breath, and helped me up.

"Change and when you get back the sheets will be changed and your family will be waiting for you in the living room," Harry said soothingly.

I made it halfway to the closet when I stopped. I turned to Harry and watched as he gathered all of the sheet and yank them off of the bed. He ran into the hall and came back with new, crisp, snow white sheets, and began to put the bed back together. He placed the pillows back the way I liked them, made the quilt all scrunchy so that I don't feel like I'm in a straight-jacket, and flipped the front down so I could lie on it. He turned to me.

"Do you need help?" he asked walking over and looking at me seriously.

I nodded and tried to calm all the fear and anxiety I was feeling. He walked me back to the bed and sat me on it. He peeled off my shirt and bra and then threw them over his head. He made me stand and slowly slipped down my pants and lowered my damp panties. Finally he took off my shoes and placed them on top of the small pile of clothes. A minute later he returned with an special birthing dress that was all loose and had nice thin straps. I lifted my arms and allowed him to put it on me. He kissed me on the forehead and lifted me up, with great difficulty, and made me lean against the headboard.

"I'm going to call the clan. Please don't do anything stupid while I'm gone. I figure we have twenty minutes before your family gets here," Harry said and then with one final glance he raced down the stairs.

I sat against the bed and began to breath deeply like they told us to do in those foolish muggle classes. In…and out. In…and out. Through the nose, out the mouth. Silly stupid things! How are they supposed to work when your breathing erratically in fright and your all nervous and sweaty?

Harry returned minutes later and sat on the bed and held my hand. I just closed my eyes and waited silently for another contraction to ripple through my body.

"Do you need anything?" Harry asked as he stroked my cheek.

I shook my head once and took another deep breath. This was really uncomfortable. I felt all this stupid muscle contractions, not to mention this unbearable pain the ripped through unannounced.

"Ginny?" Hermione called from downstairs.

"Mione?" I called back not moving because, let's face it. I usually don't hop up and run to Hermione when I'm not about to give birth, no reason to do it now.

"How are you?" Mione asked walking in the room carrying a dozing Mia. I glanced at her and then closed my eyes.

"Well not good," I snarled in a light manner. I don't think I was going to be the nicest person during this process. Hermione however just nodded and sat on the other side of me.

"Where's your midwife?" Hermione asked placing Mia in the cradle that she had transfigured from my bedside table.

I turned to Harry and saw him close his eyes and groan.

"You forgot? You forgot to call our midwife?" I asked my voice rising.

"I'll go do it now," Harry said getting up and moving towards the door.

"Oh no by all means take your time. I've got all the bloody time in the world," I snarled angrily. He just rushed from the room and left me alone with Hermione who was sighing and glancing around the room wistfully.

After a minute no one returned and I turned to see Hermione reading my book.

"Tell me," I said quietly.

"Tell you what?" Hermione whispered closing the book in interest.

"How much does it hurt?" I hissed back. "I have had everyone lie to me saying it was nothing."

Hermione paused. "You want the truth?"

"No please lie to me," I snarled.

"It hurts A LOT," Hermione said biting her bottom lip.

"Like breaking a bone?" I suggested.

She shook her head. "Like having a baby."

I leaned back into the bed. "Someone told me they would rather give birth then go to the dentist," I offered helpfully.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Dentists get a lot of crap but they aren't that bad. I would rather go to the dentist than give birth."

"You're biased," I said dismissively.

"Be that as it may, giving birth hurts so much that all you can do is latch onto something and squeeze with all your might until the pain goes away."

"Thanks. You're very helpful," I snapped.

"Want me to tell you something good about it?" Hermione asked in her know-it-all-tone.

"Please," I muttered.

"It is all so worth is," she said in a hushed voice. I turned to her, my face sweaty and her eyes shining. "There is nothing in the entire world like the feeling of hearing your baby's cry for the first time, or holding your baby for the first time. And look at you! You've got it double!"

I looked at her for a moment. "That is the most helpful you have ever been."

She beamed at me and then got tears in her eyes.

"If you cry you have to leave," I said pointing at the door where a list was posted telling people what would piss me off the most.

"I'm not crying," Hermione said sniffing into a napkin. "I just have really bad allergies."

I glanced at the calendar and felt another jolt of pleasure. "I last more than six hours and these babies will be born on Valentine's Day," I said happily.

Hermione glanced at the calendar and smiled. "Yeah…"

Ten Hours Later

Harry sat at my side and sponged my forehead. I sighed unhappily and shifted.

"Get me something. I don't care what it is just give me something to make this uncontrollable pain go away! Please I will do anything! I will do your stupid little fantasy that is written in your diary and I will give you so many blowjobs that your body wont make fluid for months. And I'll do it anytime you want, anytime you get hard I will do it if you just get me something for this bloody pain!" I moaned taking a hold of Harry's shirt after a particularly bad contraction in which I didn't think I was going to make it.

"First of all it's a journal and you told me you didn't read it!" Harry said blushing extremely deeply.

"Pick your fucking battles," I hissed as another contraction ripped through me and I clenched onto his hand tightly. "I'm sorry I read it. Please get me something. Anything. I don't care if it dyes my hair pink! Just give me something that is going to make this pain stop! I cant handle this much longer!" I said and to my horror felt tears in my eyes.

Harry just shh-ed me and kissed my cheek. I slapped him away.

"Don't bloody kiss me! You're lucky if I ever let you touch me again! You stupid bastard!" I roared and Harry was taken aback until he realized I had another contraction. He didn't twitch until I felt a bone break in his hand. That's when he let out a yelp and started hopping around the room in pain. I watched him with a mixture of horror and amusement.

"I am so sorry," I snorted. Harry just glared at me for a moment.

"Max," I said suddenly. Harry looked at me.

"Harry," he replied in a jokey manner all the while trying not to cry from the pain that was radiating off of his body.

"We can not name our child Lucas! That sounds so much like Lucius! Ew! We mine as well name our child Tom or make it even easier and name one Lord and the other Voldemort!" I cried realizing it suddenly. There was another long pause.

"I am so glad you realized that," Harry said sounding relieved. "I thought of that like a few weeks ago and you snapped at me when I tried to say something."

I just giggled and heard footsteps walking down the hall. We both turned to see the medi-witch walking in looking excited.

"Ready to push?" she asked in a cheerful manner.

"Sure," I replied sarcastically.

"I have been on the job for oh I don't know…sixty years and in all that time I have never seen anyone so calm as you when giving birth," the woman said smiling at me.

I stared at her for a moment. "I'm going to die aren't I? This pushing thing is going to be the death of me isn't it?"

She laughed. "Don't you take compliments?"

"No," I replied as my mother and Hermione walked in. My mother smoothed down my hair and walked to the other side where the medi-witch was sitting with her fingers checking my width.

"Ready?" mum asked my beaming at the head poking out from…me.

"Mother get away from there!" I snapped and she quickly came back up to my head.

"Oh my god Ginny you have to come see this," Harry said in awe.

"I hate you right now," I snarled. He rolled his eyes at me and brought out our long mirror and pushed it right in front of me. I stared at the head peaking out slightly.

"Ok now push when I tell you too," the medi-witch said and got gloves on. I stared at the mirror in fright. I cant do that! The head is not going to fit through me! I can't do this!

"Ginny?" Hermione asked picking up on my nerves.

"Cant you just magic them out or something?" I asked feeling as if my throat went dry. The medi-witch laughed again.

"I love you I do! You have to be my favorite," she said still laughing. Then she saw I was serious. "Heavens no! Who knows what damage that would do? Your body is made for this!"

Whatever. She isn't the one about to push two babies out of her.

"Ginny you can do this," Harry said in my ear. I turned to him and saw the nervousness and excitement in him and felt this burst of confidence that seemed to come from no where.

"Of course I can do this!" I said sitting up and pushing with all my might.

I did so for a minute when I felt relieved and then I heard it. The baby cried and it screamed and it was like angel music or something. I had never heard anything so beautiful in my entire life.

"Boy!" the medi-witch cried.

The baby was placed on my chest and instantly settled down slightly. I began to cry slightly at the look Harry had on his face. He was smiling in a way I had never seen before because nothing we had ever done was quite this special. I mean we MADE this. No matter what anyone says, we made this baby.

Mum quickly took the baby to another medi-witch who was waiting with a clean towel. I felt a sense of loss as soon as the baby was taken from me but turned to Harry and saw tears in his eyes. He kissed me.

"God he's beautiful," Harry whispered into my ear. I nodded weakly and began to brace myself for the other push that I knew I had to do. I was sooo weak though.

"Can you do this mom?" the medi-witch asked looking at me over the blue paper sheet. I nodded once and sat up again. "Alright push now."

I did so and another minute later the baby slipped out and I felt empty and deprived of something. I watched in amazement as the baby let out another loud cry. I gasped and felt relieved.

"Another boy!"

Suddenly everything felt right. I couldn't imagine my life without these two little babies crying and screaming on the top of their lungs.

"Times?" the medi-witch, whose name is Lucy, asked the other medi-witch.

There was a pause. "Six thirty and six-thirty six."

"Baby 1 six-thirty, Saturday February 14, 2004. Baby 2 six-thirty six, Saturday February 14, 2004. You did good mom, not many women could do that twice in one night," Lucy said sounding as though I had won her respect.

I just nodded sleepily and felt Harry give me another kiss. Hermione was crying and hugging mum who looked like if she cried anymore she was going to vomit all over my carpet.

"My baby has babies," mum sobbed again.

"Names?" Lucy asked ticking something off on a piece of paper. I turned to Harry questioningly.

"We still like Jacob right?" he asked looking like he was thinking. I nodded slowly.

The baby's were wheeled over to me and I glanced at their gorgeous features. Baby 2 was sleeping peacefully while Baby 1 was moving around trying to get used to his new surroundings.

I pointed at Baby 2. "Jacob Sirius."

Harry nodded his agreement and kissed my cheek again.

"Baby 1?" Lucy asked looking at us. I frowned in concentration trying to find a name just right for the baby. I looked at his chubby cheeks and the way he was all squinty like he was totally thrown by his surroundings. I turned to Harry and gave him a look that said I was open to all and any ideas.

"Alexander," Harry finally said and I smiled.

"Alex Potter…I like it," I said smiling happily.

"Middle?" Lucy asked now snapping on gum like a bored teen with a summer job(I admit to being a gum popper when people come in and take a long ass time.)

"James," Harry said firmly touching the baby's cheek. "Alexander James."

"Alright then. Now you have like three months to change your mind or something. Can we let your family in now?" Lucy asked smiling at us.

I nodded and she opened the double doors and my family and Remus and Tonks toppled in. I kissed Harry again and sighed happily.

"Ours," I said smiling.

"Ours," Harry said kissing me again.

For the first time in Harry's life he had a family.

A/N Please read and review. So help me Cher if anyone, ANYONE, reviews asking if this is the end. Just…don't. I am sorry for the wait but I had an anxiety attack Wednesday night and I don't know if anyone has ever had them but their not good and I was so tired that I didn't get on the computer yesterday. I am so sorry for the weight. Oh and the mean reviewer was not the cause of it. It was something within my own mind, but I do appreciate the hundred or so people who immediately rushed to my defense. I literally perked up. My mother thought I snuck a painkiller or something. Alright review please!