Blue Eyes

Standard Disclaimers Apply

IV - The Day He Chose Starfleet

He had joined Starfleet. For most of his life people had been comparing him to his father. They told him he needed to make a dead man proud. That he had to live up to the memory of George Kirk. Teachers, counselors, and even recruiting officers had all tried to make him reach his potential and make his father's sacrifice worth it. He had said to hell with all of them. What did they know about him? He wasn't stupid, he couldn't be who they wanted him to be. He could never be George Kirk.

When Captain Christopher Pike sat down to talk with him in the backwater dive of a bar he had sat and listened only because he was to dizzy from his latest fight to leave. The man had started by talking about his father and Jim prepared himself for the recruitment speech that was coming. He go far in Starfleet, do new things, meet interesting beings. All he had to do in return was be his father. The too smart for an Iowa farm boy insulting comebacks that were on the tip of his tongue died when Pike did something no one else had ever done. He dared Jim to be better than his father. He didn't want him to be his father, he wanted him to be more.

Jim Kirk never could turn down a challenge. He wondered what it would be like to surpass his father, to finally leave the dead man shadow. He got on the shuttle, joined Starfleet, and decided to graduate in three years.

One month into classes life was going well. Jim was finding himself and even though there were still whispers about how he was George Kirk's son he was escaping his past life. He was even beginning to put aside the fact that he had killed Sam. A vision of a future was starting to come together and he like what he was seeing. Then she had shown up. Looking back he should have expected it but after so much time had gone by he had figure she hadn't cared what he had done.

The moment he saw Winona punch Pike his anger began to raise. How dare she! It was clear that the Captain had no idea who she was or why she had attacked him. The woman had gone crazy. He had to get rid of her.

Jim saw a light of realization flicker through Pike's eyes as he came up behind Winona. The Captain actually smiled the second before Jim grabbed her. As he tried to contain his thrashing mother Jim felt Bone's brush past him. Good, Pike's nose had looked broken. When Winona sagged he pulled her tighter leery of a trick. He wouldn't put it past the blond woman. He looked down at her and felt his whole body tense.

Winona had that look in her eyes again. The one that said she was in a different time, seeing a different person. Jim felt his anger begin to mount again. He wanted to hurt her. To make her feel the pain she had always pushed on him. He truly lashed out at her for the first time.

"What the hell do you think you're doing Winona?" Jim took a sick pleasure when she flinched at the use of her first name.

"Have you finally gone complete insane or have you always been this crazy? Do you realize that you just hit one of my superiors? That could cause repercussion for me. Did you think of that? Hmm… Maybe you did and you just didn't care. It would fit your MO. You are one sorry excuse for a mother."

She was fading farther into whatever she was seeing. It was getting hard for her to breath. He couldn't believe it. Why did she always do this to him? "You can't…not safe…come home."

She came here to bring him home? He laughed quietly to himself and intensified his verbal assault. "You think I want YOU to save me? That I NEED you to save me. Please, Winona I wouldn't go anywhere with you if my life depended on it. I've been here for a month. Why come now? Was it the only convenient time or did it take you this long to figure out I was gone. Don't you understand you worthless excuse for a mother. I'm not going back to Iowa. I'd rather die!"

She pulled herself out of his arms and he looked towards Pike as Bones told him his nose was broken. Big surprise there. He turned his sights back to Winona. She looked so pathetic that for a moment he almost felt sorry for what he was doing.

The feeling vanished when he realized that she was having trouble looking him in the eye. A thousand memories rushed through his mind. He saw childhood moments spent wondering why she wouldn't look at him. Why she hated him. His rage finally boiled over.

"Look at me Winona. Can you do that? Look me in the eye and see me for once. It's not that hard. DO IT!" The woman faltered a turned her head away. Jim couldn't help but let out a bitter laugh. He had never called her on it before and now that he did it was both freeing and damning.

He threw one last statement out before walking away. "Go back to Iowa you crazy bitch and never come back. I don't want to see you ever again." He walked away and never looked back.

Later as Bones was bitching at him for treating his mother that way (even if she was crazy.) Jim asked him if Winona had looked up as he left. He said "No."

AN: Hey, I promised you guys that I would finish this and I will. Now I want you opinion on something. In Blue Eyes the last chapter is happy, but I left it open for at the end so that Son's Eyes could end on a sad note if I wanted. How do you want this to end, happy or sad?

Like it, hate it, print and burn it? Let me known please.