The End and What Its Worth- Chapter 32

The Fallout

"..............Alright, so close to the last official chap. One more after this! Thnx everyone! Oooh, and a LITTLE WARNING: near the end of the chap, it may sound slashy, but I didnt attend it to be that way; I was going for more father-son....."

The ambulance came quickly to the scene of the attack. Morgan never left Reid's side as his unconscious friend was wheeled into the ambulance car.

Hotch fell down to his knees- eyes glued on his dead wife. Haley was dead. Never coming back. And as much as he wanted to believe it was Reid's fault, he knew that the younger man wasn't the true cause to her death.

The person who truly caused her death was done with now- gone forever. He was sure of that since he had been the one to put the bullet in Foyet's head himself.

"Hey, let's get you out of here." Rossi said, putting a comforting hand on Hotch's shoulder. He just nodded, unable to cry or feel anything. The shock was just too much to bear for him, and Rossi understood that.

Prentiss kept he eyes low, her mind thinking about everyone in her life that she ever cared for. JJ cried as she thought about losing Henry and Will. Garcia watched as Rossi escorted Hotch off of the roof. She, like JJ, was crying.

As the ambulance took off and the BAU team left the scene, the local cops and FBI agents finished up closing the crime scene. Foyet was dead and the case was over....

Two Hours Later

The BAU team was still waiting at the hospital patiently for news about Reid. They were told that he needed major surgery to get the bullet out since it had split in half due to a complicated impact. The knife wound was deep enough to requite surgery also, but they just sewed it to keep it from bleeding and gave him antibiotics to fight infection until his body healed a little more after the first surgery.

"Dr. Reid?" a nurse in pink scrubs called. The BAU team stood up, bracing themselves for the news they were about to receive.

"The bullet did split, as we already knew, but when it split it didn't split equally. A part f the bullet lodged into his ribs. We managed to get it out with minimal damage. Dr. Reid will be a bit more sore than he originally would be because of it, but it won't cause any major issues. The knife wound was a bit deeper than we originally thought it was, but we still can't treat it until a his body has had a chance to process what is happening to it. After it processes this, his body will feel the pain even more severely than before, and we will then be able to start the next surgery. He is expected to make a full recovery, but it won't necessarily be a quick one. Dr. Reid will need a lot of time to recover. He will have to go through therapy for his leg, but before that his knife wound and ribs have to heal. We expect him to be able to start the physical therapy in two months, but the doctor is still not certain. In the meantime, he will need a few months off work." the nurse explained.

"Thank god." JJ whispered, glad that Reid was going to be okay.

"When can we see him?" Morgan asked, eager to see his young friend.

"As soon as he wakes up. Given the amount of anesthetic he was given along with the physical wariness that his situation causes, I would have to say he will be up sometime tomorrow morning. In the mean time, I think you should all go home and get some sleep. You all deserve it." With that, the team nodded a thank you to the nurse and left off for their hotel rooms.....

The Next Day (Morning)

After a quick complimentary breakfast, the team traveled back to the hospital to see their youngest again. Everyone was quiet on the car ride there; they were all to nervous about Reid to find small talk conversations....

A few minutes later, they finally reached the hospital. They were greeted by the same nurse they had met the previous night.

"Dr. Reid is awake, but he is with his doctor right now. It will be a few more minutes before visitors are allowed. And when you are visiting him, please do not mention your team's case. If he brings it up, answer his questions, but keep everything to a minimum until he becomes more coherent." she warned.

"Yes ma'am, we understand." Hotch said on behalf of his team. She nodded and led them to the waiting room.

15 minutes later, the nurse came back out.

"He's awake." she smiled. "Because of how small his room is and how tired he still is, I caution you all to visit one at a time. That way, it will also e less overwhelming for him."

"Morgan, you go first." Rossi said, although all the team was thinking the same thing. Morgan nodded and headed over to Reid's room....

"Hey Pretty Boy." Morgan smiled as he saw his friend blink his eyes, trying hard to keep them open.

"Hey." Reid croaked back, his voice already cracking. Morgan accepted this as an invitation to join Reid closer, so he sat down on the chair right beside Reid.

"How are you holding up?" he asked, concern.

"Fine."

That was the one word that Morgan didn't want to hear, because he knew that, in Reid's context of the word, he was not okay. And he shouldn't be, Morgan thought. Not after all he had been through.

"You're a horrible liar." Morgan said. Reid managed a small smile at that.

"I know."

Morgan glanced over Reid's feature; his normally beautifully pale skin now black and purple, his normally somewhat kept hair disarrayed and unorganized, his large brown eyes now swollen and red, his long, skinny fingers normally active and graceful now curved over and weak. Reid was not exactly the perfect picture of help at the moment, and Morgan knew Reid would need help getting over this one.

"How's Hotch?" Reid asked, breaking Morgan's line of thoughts.

"He'll live, with some help, that is. Jack's with his aunt right now, but he's going to be coming back by a few hours later. The kid seems to be holding up well." Morgan answered half-truthfully. Jack had gone away, but he had went to see a therapist.

For a few more minutes, Morgan caught Reid up in what was happening with the team, sparing any details involving Foyet. After Morgan left, JJ, Prentiss, Rossi, Garcia, and finally Hotch came to visit.

"You look exhausted." Hotch stated.

"I am."

" You took a bullet and a knife stab-all in the same day. I'd imagine tiredness is only natural." Reid smiled at Hotch's half-hearted attempt to lighten the mood, despite the fact that it had failed miserably.

"Reid, I know everyone's probably asked you this by now, but are you okay?" Hotch asked sincerely. He looked into the overtired eyes of his youngest colleague. He could see all the grief and pain he felt as Hotch stared back at him.

Finally, Reid broke down. He started crying nonstop as his memories started coming back to him.

Foyet kidnapping him....... 'The Friend'......Foyet drugging him.....Haley jumping in front of him....

Hotch sighed as he fought tears himself- seeing Reid like this was almost unbearable for him. To try to comfort him, Hotch scooted over to where he could let Reid wrap around him but still be on the bed. Fortunately, it worked successfully, and Reid was now crying on Hotch's shirt, his hands shaking and cold.

"Shh....It's over now; you don't have to be afraid." Hotch whispered as he wrapped his arms around Reid's trembling frame, trying to stop the man from falling off the bed. After a few minutes, Hotch could feel Reid's breathing approach normal and his sniffles stopping.

"Reid?" he whispered, thinking he had fallen to sleep. When he didn't answer, Hotch gently moved his hand down to Reid's side- turning his body so that he was on the bed. Once Reid was on, he pulled the blanket over-top Reid, seeing as he was still shaking. Since he had told the team to go get some rest, Hotch sat in the chair next to Reid, waiting until he woke up....

A Few Hours Later

Reid woke up only to find that he was not alone. He was glad, though, because he didn't want to be alone anymore; he wanted someone to be there for him and right now that person was Hotch.

Hotch managed to smile a little when Reid woke up and looked in his direction. "Hey." he simply said.

"Hi." Reid replied weakly.

"Feeling any better?"

"A little." Reid said, coughing when he finished. Hotch offered Reid a glass of water one of the nurses had left out for Reid, and he gladly accepted it.

Hotch noted that Reid looked even more tired than he had yesterday, if that was even possible. He could also tell that Reid wanted to say something, but almost looked afraid to say it. "What is it, Reid? You know you can tell me anything."

Reid looked around nervously for a moment, as if gathering the courage to say it. Finally, he took the risk and started talking. "Will....will you hold me?" he asked desperately, tears running down his face (although Hotch could tell Reid was trying to hide them).

Hotch, taken a little aback by the request, just nodded his head. His youngest agent never embraced physical contact much, and the fact that he was asking for it now proved just how bad off the younger agent really was.

Without hesitation, Hotch sat himself on the bed and opened his arms- beckoning for Reid to scoot inside them. Reid gratefully rested his head on his boss' chest, breathing heavily as Hotch's arms closed around him- hugging him close like he had last night. Reid nuzzled closer to Hotch as more tear threatened to show while Hotch played with Reid's hair, knowing it would help calm him down (a tip he had gotten from Gideon over the years).

Hotch let Reid get as close to him as he wanted, knowing how badly Reid needed to know someone was there for him. Being careful not to aggravate his stitches or knee, Reid laid down in Hotch's warm embrace, glad that he had allowed him to do so in the first place. For a long time they stayed like that, but neither f them minded. Hotch needed this just as much as Reid did. Reid wanted someone to hold him, and Hotch wanted someone to hold......

Later that night Reid told the team exactly what had happened- from being kidnapped, the plan Foyet made him device, the disguises, 'the friend' and the deal he made, the hotels, everything. The hardest part was admitting that he had allowed 'the friend' to 'rape' him to give a message to the team.

"He...he said he wanted me to pretend he was....raping...me. He said it turned him on. It was the only way I could tell you how to find us; I didn't have another choice." Reid explained, shame creeping up in his voice.

"Spence, it wasn't your fault. You shouldn't have even been in the situation in the first place." JJ comforted.

Suddenly, it made sense to Hotch why Reid was so clingy a few hours ago; no matter if it was 'consensual' or not, Reid had been a victim of rape, and he had a sneaky suspicion that 'the friend' was his first time. It broke his heart to think that bastard had taken that innocence away from Reid-most likely making it close to impossible for Reid to feel that way about another human being again.

"Hey, it's okay Pretty Boy. We're all here for you." Morgan said with a sad smile. Reid absent-mindedly wiped at his tears as the team fussed over him. No matter how much he hated the attention, he was glad that he could count of them......

Haley's funeral was a few weeks later. Reid was unable to attend because he was still in the hospital, but the rest of the team went. Everything went according to plan; people said how sorry they were, offered Hotch a hug or a kiss of the cheek, and went along their way. After the funeral was over, Hotch picked up his son and went to check up with the rest of his team....

By the end of the night everyone had made their way back to the hospital. Everyone sat in silence as they grieved over Haley. Not a word was spoken that night, but that was okay with them all. They could have told each other a thousand words that they had all been told a thousand times, but there were certain occasions where words were meaningless. This was one of them.

And so the night came by and the BAU team found themselves parting ways. As snow fell from the sky they started their cars and headed home, all of them ready to sleep.

When they got home they had a lot of time to think about things. They thought about Reid, Haley, the team, their pasts. Their smiles and laughter, their frowns and tears. They thought about the next morning, what they would do and if they would have a case. They thought about grief and death, and they thought about the end and what is was worth......

All the while they realized that the end never truly ends- that after the end, life only started again.....

The End

"....Yeah, crappy cliché ending, but theres going to be an epilogue. I hope you guys liked the story! Look for my new slash story called 'Pain'. It will be posted by the end of the month! Oh, and inspiration came from the song 'Feel it Now' by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club. It really fits the story :) "