Trying something new. Instead of Butters' POV, I'm doing Kenny's. Because I really love Kenny.

This is a little break from the Stan/Kyle issue, but I won't be putting it into a one shot because there will still be mentions of the plot, and I'm not looking to confuse anyone.

Tell me if you like this or if I should switch back to Butters.

I fucking hate dial up. Dude. Do you have any idea how old this laptop is? It's too old to even know what an internet connection is. I'm using like, Windows 98.

But the slowness isn't all too frustrating. I'm a pretty patient guy.

And I kind of need to vent. But not in a bad way.

Have you ever had one of those nights that leaves you almost depressed once it's over? You just want it to go on forever. And when you're home, you want to relive every second of it. Maybe writing it down will help me do that?

I don't know.

Butters is a really nice kid. I don't want to rush him by making whatever we might have going on (a relationship?) totally public. I'm horny, but I'm not an asshole. That's what masturbation is for. (As long as I'm masturbating to Butters. I mean what?)

My point is that we haven't told anyone, so you probably haven't heard about our date. "Date". You know, with quotations and all that shit because the validity of our clearly obvious teenage luuuurve isn't quite established.

Well, okay, asshole, since you're ASKING, I guess I'll tell you where we went. We went to Bennigan's. Because Butters loves Bennigan's. I would know, he told me himself.

It really isn't too shabby a place. And it's Irish, which earns it some points – since I'm Irish myself. What, you didn't know that? McCormick. The law basically states that any last name starting with a "Mc" is Irish. You should know that!

The place is all nice and wooden and casual and homey. Not too fancy, with a ton of beer. Kinda wish I was of age to drink in public. Or, maybe not. Since that might not make the best impression on Butters. He's so ridiculously innocent, it's unexpectedly hot. I'm serious.

Butters got the chicken tenders with a side of creamed corn, and I settled for a classic Irish Reuben burger. I felt kind of bad for making him pay, but Butters insisted he didn't mind. He's so sweet, it fucking kills me. I really need a job so I can take him somewhere nice some time, though.

I drove him to the cinema in my pickup when we were done eating. There was a late showing of Alice in Wonderland, and even if I might prefer porn or explosions over fantasy sci-fi, spending time with Butters was worth sitting through one of my first PG movies in nearly ten years.

He seemed to like it. Couldn't really shut up about it on the drive back, but I didn't mind. I considered steering with only one hand so I could hold Butters' hand, but with my bad luck I'd probably end up crashing and dying somehow, so I didn't bother. But that's awfully cute of me, isn't it?

I know. I'm so fucking smooth.

I drove us to a little area right behind Starks, and pulled him to the back of the truck with me. His curfew wasn't for another hour, and I figured we could use all the time together we were given.

"K-Kenny? Can I ask ya somethin'?"

"You just did – did you want to ask me something else?"

"A-are you… no, I shouldn't say it… but I'm awful curious… Kenny?"

"Hm?"

"Y... you don't like Bebe anymore, do you?"

"No! Butters, hell fucking no!" I grabbed him by the waist and pulled him closer to me, and then I draped my arm over his shoulders. "I don't think I liked her much to begin with. She was always just… there."

"Then wh-why'd ya stay with her so long?"

"I didn't know I had another option." I sighed. "Butters, I don't want to be a whore. I don't want to like… screw a bunch of different people all the time. I mean, sex is nice, but it just leaves you feeling empty, I guess. I want to commit."

And he just cuddled up to me. When I dropped him off at his house, he kissed me goodnight. That kid is the best.

Shit, I still need to call Kyle.

Look, corn. Just like I promised.

UM, SO WAS THIS OKAY? SHOULD I GET BACK TO STYLE NOW?

I don't know how many more chapters I want, because I'm not looking to drag this out much longer. Even though it still doesn't have a solid plot line. I FAIL.