Hello Darkness My Old Friend

From the first, you know that Yugi and yourself are not like other couples. It's not the fact you happen to share a body and a mind, although those certainly are major differences. It's not even the fact most of your intimate activities take place in the secret corridors of your mind and his. It's the fact you both happen to perfectly harmonize with one another in every way shape and form and you still manage to keep the fact that this will end someday out of every conversation you have. Every relationship has an expiration date, but the both of you have the horrible knowledge of knowing when that will probably happen, unlike other couples' who don't know where they are going to be from one day to another. Till death till you part? One of you is already dead, yet that has not stopped either of you from remaining together. No. It's not the fact that you are dead is what will part you from Yugi. It's the fact he is alive is what will part you from Yugi.

If life were fair, you would have truly died 3000 years ago. If life were fair, you would have found your paradise among whomever you had known in whatever life you had lived before you died and wound up inside a small gold pyramid on a chain. But… you reconsider, life must have a sense of humor too, because it let you have someone like Yugi to share in everything you are. The boy's capacity for love is boundless, and that he would choose to give it all to you, every drop of it, amazes you. Yugi looks at you and sees an oasis in a desert, he sees home, and he doesn't care that it's only a mirage, and once he sees it for the illusion it really is, that it will break his heart.

He's been without before you came into his life. He may not like it, but he'll move on with his life, because deep down in places he may not verbally acknowledge, Yugi knows he's strong enough to live without you. He's a whole person because of you. He can stand on his own. He also knows, because he's seen it, he's felt it, that despite your bluster, your confidence, and your posturing, you are not a whole person without him. Even if and when you get your memories back, both of you know you're not complete without him. The day you enter the afterlife without him is going to be the hardest thing you'll ever have to do – and there's nothing neither Yugi nor you can do it about it. You share this burden of your future parting silently. It's the only way either of you can bear it.

In the sanctity of Yugi's soul room, neither of you allows the future to ruin the bliss of the present. How can it with Yugi spread so beautifully beneath your gaze? With his tired yet happy smile as he gazes back up at you and traces the lines and angles of your face? Yugi's whispered endearments wash over you like a warm wave and you cannot help gently giving his nose an Eskimo kiss, murmuring a rakish reply, drawing out giggles and half-hearted slaps to your ribs from him. You smile seductively and duck your head down to proceed to drive him out of his mind. This is how it always is between the both of you. You cannot allow Yugi to indulge you until you are certain he has been taken care of. It's the only way you are able to enjoy his reciprocation.

And boy, can Yugi reciprocate! Anyone mistaking Yugi for a submissive cowering sort has no idea what he or she is writing off. Not even Yugi's friends know the full breadth and width of this young man's personality. Yugi is as thorough as yourself when it comes to the exchange of sexual pleasure, but the little guy has a more colorful education of sex than yourself, and eagerly implements what he learns upon your encounters with gusto. Yugi may moan and weep enough to make the banshees in hell jealous but Yugi… Yugi makes you scream. What words you can get in edgewise are pleas to go harder and faster and passionate unending cries of "YES! OH YES!"

You vocalize because Yugi loves your voice; mostly you cry out because it really does feel that good being with him. You love showing him how much he pleases you. Tonight his efforts have you end in tears of pure joy. Yugi hovers over you, sweaty, smiling that dopey smile of his, and just admiring your own sweaty form with impish relish as you just lay there and sob.

"Why," you sigh when you are able to get a hold of yourself, "why can't I make you feel what you make me feel?"

Yugi frowns, rolls to lie beside you, and laces your fingers together. He kisses the back of your hand and then the center of your palm with obvious pleasure. "You can. You do."

"But… like this…"

Yugi snickers and kisses your chin, then your face, your temple, then back to your lips. He's very kissy tonight – not that you're complaining. "We just have different ways of showing it, mou hitori no boku." He then smiles again. "I'd certainly love to stop biting my lip all of the time but unfortunately if I were to scream, my mother would hear me."

"Your mother can't hear me?"

"No. It's easier for you to let go because I can keep you separated from me when we make love." He smiles again sheepishly, a silly bright smile. "Unfortunately I can't do the same thing for myself."

You catch and return his last kiss halfway through as he pulls away. He leans forward into it eagerly. Both you lie there and make out for a little while, before you both have to come up for air.

"If that is such a problem, aibou, I can certainly fix it." You let the devil inhabit your smirk this time. "It'll lessen my ability to enjoy the experience completely but I think the results will outweigh any personal inconvenience to myself."

Yugi stares at you, still breathing hard from the prolonged kissing. "You… You want it that much?"

"Yugi, in case you haven't noticed already, I love your voice as much as you claim to love mine." You level a look at him. "I think it is hardly equality between us if you get to enjoy how much you please me but I cannot enjoy how much I please you."

Yugi rolls his eyes. "Everything is a game with you."

You chuckle. "In case you haven't noticed, aibou, you are my game, and I intend to play you," you lean over him, leaning into his face, looking deeply into his eyes, whispering, "until my turn ends."