Disclaimer: I own nothing. Nada. Zilch. Nil.

This was edited to keep spelling consistant. Full explenation at the bottom.

This Means War

Kondo

After today's awful practice, I was hoping that the entire thing would be over. And, for one blessed day, I thought it really was. But that would just be too peaceful, now wouldn't it?

The regulars decided to consult Inui and me for ideas this time, since it's easier to prank someone you know. I was reluctant to release any information, but Inui, still irritated from Ayame's stunt with the hair dye, freely released his data.

"Ayame doesn't like loud noises and it neat almost to the point of obsessive compulsive. She is an only child, and doesn't form close bonds with many people. Her friends are a collection of people from the second and third year that she enjoys being around, but they almost never visit her outside school, or vice-versa. Kondo is the only person I have found that has actually visited her house," Inui read from his green notebook of terror.

"Really?" Eiji said, "You sure you're not dating her, Taro-chan?"

"Of course not," I protested, "Her parents are always too busy to pay attention to her, so she stays at the dojo that we attend all the time. I do too, because my parents work. We've trained together for years, Ayame is like a sister."

Eiji and Momo just laughed at me, and Inui flipped through his notebook and started writing furiously. I decided that any further rejection would be a waste of time. "What are you guys planning to do, anyway?" I said, not completely sure that I actually wanted the answer.

Regardless of what I wanted, they were already scheming away. "People who are obsessively organized are very simple to annoy," Inui said, "Because a collection of small things can make them extremely irate."

Fuji tipped his head to one side, thoughtfully. "You mentioned loud noises, earlier, Inui. Does that mean she has sensitive ears?"

"I believe that is the case," Inui responded.

"Then, because I sit behind her, do you think she'd hear me if I whispered in class, even if no one else could?" Fuji continued, clearly scheming.

"There is a eighty seven percent chance that reasoning would be correct," theorized Inui, "What kind of noises do you have in mind?"

"Oh, it doesn't really matter," Fuji said, "Just as long as it's obnoxious and repetitive. It's like Chinese water torture," he said added brightly.

I shuddered, that was going to be more than enough to irritate poor Ayama. "Saa . . . we won't know how well it works till we give it a try," Fuji smiled, "So I'll start as soon as I get a chance, alright?"

This was met by a general chorus of grunts and murmurs and giggles of approval. I just let out a sigh of resegnation, and told Fuji, "Try not to let her kill you."

Fuji, being Fuji, just stood there and smiled.

Ayame

I was pretty happy with the results of the tennis ball experiment, but I had had so much fun these past few weeks that I wasn't done just yet. Plus, I still hadn't been able to make Tezuka lose face, because my last prank had been more on the general tennis team. As I mused over what I was going to do next, sitting in science class, I heard a small meow.

I immediately looked around – out the window, around the classroom – and found nothing. It seemed like nobody else had even heard, so I looked back at the lab report I was writing.

"Grrrr…" I heard softly, making me flinch. I firmly rubbed my ears, glanced around again, and went back to the class work, hoping what ever it was would just go away.

But it didn't. I heard a repeating pattern of taps, scratches, hisses, and a variety of animal noises for the rest of class. After the pattern had finished for the sixth time, I had decided that everybody else was deaf, or I was hearing things. And since you didn't have to be Inui to know that the chances of about thirty five people simultaneously losing their hearing were incredibly small, it was starting to look like the latter.

I groaned softly and set my head on my desk. "Meow . . . ." it looked like I was getting a little stressed out. Midterms were coming up, so I had been participating in cram school, which is definitely not good for your brain. Plus, after word of my stunts with the tennis team had reached the ears of the female population of Seigaku, I'd generally been exiled by all the fan girls. This is about ninety percent of all the girls in school, and a few males with severe inferiority complexes. So the majority of the school had made it their personal goal to make my life as difficult as possible.

"Grrrr…."the pattern continued. I must really be losing my mind, I mused sadly. I suppose I should have known that it was only a matter of time.

"Hiss . . ." came the next sound. I felt like my head was going to explode. Tap, tap. Baa. Scratch of a pencil, snort of a pig. Chirp. Tap, tap. Meow. Growl. Hiss. Tap, tap, baa, scratch, snort, chirp, tap, tap. And over again. And again. And again. Scratch, snort, chirp, tap, tap.

"Suzuki-san? Suzuki-san!" I realized the teacher was shouting at me. I answered with the first word that came to mind.

"Meow?" I told the teacher. It took me a second to realize what I'd said, before saying, "I mean, yes?"

The class started snickering, I flushed. The teacher gave me a look indicating she thought that I was losing my mind. "Are you feeling all right?" she said at last, "You didn't look like you were healthy just now."

I silently thanked Kami-sama for giving me such a perfect excuse to leave, lie down, and make a feeble attempt to regain my sanity. "Actually, I have a horrible headache and I feel nauseous," I said, the last part being a lie to help me get out of class, "Can I go to the nurse?"

"Go," she said, handing me a pass, "Feel better soon." I took the proffered slip of paper, gathered my books, and hurried out of class, down the stairs and through the hall to the infirmary. The nurse was gone when I reached the office, so I just got a drink and sat down, setting my head against the wall.

I completely expected an annoying pattern of sounds to start echoing through my mind, but to my surprise, nothing happened. Definitely relieving. I kept my mind on other subjects, until I was fairly certian that I wasn't quite as insane as I thought I might be.

I spent the rest of the period trying to figure out why I'd been hearing animal noises in science.

By the end of the day, I'd decided that it had been a momentary thing, organized either by the tennis club, or the collection of people that hated me. And I was mad. I called up Kazuko, who met me at a café a ways from the school. I was so caught up in my own thoughts that I failed to notice Eiji, Momo, and Ryoma following us from a distance. As Kazuko and I settled at our own table, they entered the restaurant, and went straight to the jukebox.

I had decided to let that action, seemingly unrelated to me, slide, until I heard the song they'd chosen. It was none other than 'Barbie Girl', which I think is probably the most annoying song on the face of the planet, and I didn't even know why it was on that stupid machine. Because of my deep and utter hatred for that song, I was naturally glad when it was over.

Boy was I wrong.

'Barbie Girl' restarted, much to my irritation and to the mystification of everyone in the café. As soon as it was over that time, it restarted again.

It played for a fourth time, and the man sitting next to us, a big guy with a red face that looked like he was constantly on the edge of having a heart attack, shattered the water glass he was clenching in his pudgy fingers. I would have laughed, if I wasn't just as mad as he was.

The song came to an end, and silence reigned in the cafe for a moment. Everyone listened, praying it was over, but then 'I'm a Barbie girl . . .'.

I groaned. Kazuko slammed one hand on the table and escaped, leaving money for her food on the table, and I lost my only way out, since one of us needed to stay and pay.

I tried to cover my ears, but it wasn't any use. Customers started to leave the shop, grumbling. The red faced man was clenching his sausage fingers on the edge of the table, and I was pretty sure he was going to break it.

Four 'Barbie Girl's later, a different song came on. You think it's impossible for a completely happy, major-key song to move people to tears? Not true. I was not the only one in the shop to be relieved by the end of the 'Barbie Girl.'

The sigh of relief came from everyone in the shop as a completely different song came on. I settled down again, massaging my temples and plotting against my torturers.

And the oh-so-familiar opening bars of 'Barbie Girl' started playing again. My brows knitted together, and gave up faith that it would end. I threw away the remains of my drink, caught the waitress and paid as another round started. Eiji and Momo were outside, laughing so hard I thought they were going to puke. Ryoma was smirking in that condescending way he has, and I once again wondered how anybody could like them. I shot them a glare, and turned and walked away. It took every ounce of my self control not to try to smash their smug faces in.

There will be vengeance, just you wait, I promised them internally as I stormed away.

I went a few blocks away; to a park I used to go to when I was a child to plot my revenge. As I internally ran through a variety of situations I could arrange, when I heard the ever-too-familiar thunk of someone hitting a tennis ball against a wall. When I looked over, I saw a girl with short brown-orange hair and big blue eyes. She looked a little younger than me. My eye started twitching in irritation at the sound of the tennis ball.

The girl evidently saw me glaring at her as though she were the cause for all the world's woes, and came over to me.

"Do you have a problem?" she said. She seemed like she couldn't decide whether to be angry at me because I seemed to naturally hate her or be sympathetic, because there was obviously something wrong with me.

I sighed. Great, another person I was clearly irritating. "It's nothing. Sorry if I was bothering you."

She looked at me, deciding how to respond. After considering my brooding coutenance, she grinned and said, "Boy troubles?"

I snorted. "Not the way you're thinking." She sat on the bench next to me.

"How, then?" she asked.

I looked at her like she was crazy. I couldn't help it! After all, who goes around trying to understand the problems of complete strangers? "Who are you?" I said, dodging her question.

"Tachibana An," she said, "And isn't it polite to give your name before asking someone else's?"

"Suzuki Ayame," I told her, "I go to Seishun High."

"Fudomine," she said, "I go to Fudomine. So why were you angry with me?" Tachibana seemed to have decided that I was just having a bad day, and was not some kind of psychotic hater.

"You were playing tennis," I told her.

She stared at me. "Is that a problem somehow?"

I grimaced slightly. "Well, I seem to have irritated a few tennis boys . . ." I began, and told An all about it.

She laughed at me. "Wow, you really don't get along, do you?" she grinned at me.

My brows furrowed a little bit. She spoke as though she were familiar with everybody in the situation, not just me. "Do you know the regulars, some how?"

"My brother is a tennis player, so I've encountered them before . . ." she grinned, "I'm also friends with Momoshiro!"

I tried to imagine being friends with Momo for a moment, then looked at An in utter amazement. "And you haven't been driven insane yet? But he so . . ." To tell the truth, I wasn't entirely sure how to finish that sentence. He was just Momo. He ate twice his weight and said weird things like 'don' and like Eiji, made up relationships where they didn't exist. I, for one, was fairly certain it would take great mental stability to be friends with Momo.

"He's not so bad," she said, "If you give him a chance."

"You're out of your mind," I informed her.

And she laughed at me again. I found myself smiling along with her, not because I was feeling any better about the tennis regulars, but because I had been lucky enough to meet such an interesting person.

Suddenly, a boy with dark red hair that covered one of his eyes ran up to us. "An-chan," he said, "Tachibana-san is looking for you, and you need to go back to school."

An stood, nodding at the boy. "Do you know what he wants?" she asked cheerfully.

"I think he wants you to pick up some things for the tennis club, I think," the boy said, "But he couldn't reach your phone."

After fishing through her pocket for a moment, An pulled out a mobile, it's screen dark. "Oops," she said, "Out of battery. I better go see him."

I watched her, trying to keep from glaring at the obvious tennis boy. "Good bye," I told her, leaning back on the bench.

An suddenly grinned at me, "You should come with and meet the Fudomine tennis club. They're nothing like your regulars, don't worry."

I personally doubted that her words were even remotely true, but if An really was going shopping there was something I wanted to pick up, so I stood, and grumbled, "I suppose."

And so, I was dragged about nine blocks away to the tennis courts of Fudomine High. I personally thought their regulars were creepy, since most of them seemed to have set up some kind of cult worship circulating around their captain. One guy with blue-black hair appeared to be almost constantly talking to himself, and one guy wearing a Kaidou style bandana who appeared to be bald.

An was sent by her brother to pick up grip tape, and more tennis balls. I followed her to the store, making occasional comments to assure An I was actually listening to her rapid-fire jabbering. We separated outside the store, and I went into the electronics store a few buildings down from the sports shop.

After a few minutes of looking, I found what I wanted: a small voice recorder. I bought it, and smiling to myself like an idiot, made my way home.

Kondo

I couldn't repress a snicker as Eiji and Momo told us animatedly all about the jukebox the day before. The reactions of not only Ayame and Kazuko, but of the general victims in the café sounded absolutely priceless.

"Then the owner came," Ryoma said, "And the senpais had to run for their lives." He was smirking. Eiji gave a guilty little laugh, and rubbed the back of his head casually.

I smiled. They didn't have the same animosity as the first had when they started tormenting poor Ayame, which was a good sign.

Tezuka came out of the locker room, and promptly ordered everyone to run forty laps, effectively ending the story-telling. I couldn't help but wonder if Ayame felt the same way as the regulars, something akin to friendship; or whether it was the same bitter distaste that had sparked the war. Knowing her, it was closer to the second one.

I couldn't help but worry that sometime, somebody was going to go too far – Ayame was a lot more fragile than she'd care to admit. But for the time being, I was content to stand by and watch, admittedly with growing amusement.

A/N: I struggled with this chapter, which is why it took awhile. I'm still not really sure I like it, but I'll post it anyway, since I don't have the tolerance to do much more with it right now. I'm working on longer chapters, but I'm still not able to get over 3000 words . . . I'm so close, though! Please review and help me get better at this. Also, I decided to take KonekoKallen's suggestion and I will be posting links to Photobucket pictures that sort of matched what I had in mind when I wrote these characters on my profile.

Edit: I feel stupid now. By mistake I changed the spelling of Ayame's name for this chapter, this is not an update but a correction: I sent through, corrected the spellings, and am now reposting. This probably looks dumb to people who are reading it awhile after I posted it, but rest assured that it was originally posted with an incorrect spelling.