Tohma shut the throne room door behind him with an exasperated sigh. He couldn't believe the street rats were still alive, let alone living in the palace right under Mika's nose. If she ever found out, and at this thought Tohma shuddered visibly, she'd flip her nut. He shook his head, trying to rid himself of the recurring vision of Mika strangling him with his boa, and walked over to his office door. Through the windows in the main hall, he could see the setting sun illuminating the large city.
He stepped into his office and locked the door behind him. He couldn't handle any more surprises. He dropped into his comfy desk chair and put his head in his hands.
"Why me…?" he muttered into his empty office. He had to think of something, he had to act. If he didn't, those street rats would ruin everything. "What now?"
Tohma pushed away from his desk and stood up suddenly. He turned on the spot and started pacing so erratically that Caspian toppled off of his shoulder and landed on the floor with a soft
"What the hell…?" asked the bird groggily, rolling over onto his stomach and standing up. Looking over his shoulder, he saw Tohma's feet coming towards him and started running for cover as fast as his short legs would carry him.
"Caspian?" Tohma asked in a scared voice, noting the small, dark thing scurrying across his carpet. He quickly patted his shoulder to check for the bird. "Is that you?"
Silence greeted Tohma, and he could no longer see the shape darting around the room. Without warning, the lights in the office went out and Tohma's blood ran cold. He wasn't alone, and Caspian had already fallen prey to the intruder.
"Poor bird…" Tohma whispered in the darkness, his heart beating so hard it was threatening to rip itself out of his chest. He gulped, and started to back towards the wall. He heard a sudden ruffling noise behind him and broke out in a cold sweat.
A few gut-wrenching seconds later, sharp talons gripped Tohma's shoulder and he let loose with a scream that would have made little girls everywhere very proud. After recovering from the shock, Tohma stormed across the room and restored the lights, and then grabbed the now cackling parrot off of his shoulder.
"You devil bird!" Tohma shrieked, sick and tired of being made out to be a fool.
"You almost squashed me!" Caspian retorted, trying to bite Tohma's fingers.
"You're still a devil bird!"
"That's it? That's all you've got?"
Tohma sputtered for a few seconds and resorted to glaring at the bird. He sat the bird down on the desk and started pacing again.
"I don't have time for this, Caspian, I have to do something about those damn street rats. Mika's in love with the blond hunk who's supposed to be dead, and the short one with the bunny is a maniac."
"I'm sure you'll think of something." Caspian replied, walking around the desk and nibbling on various important documents.
Tohma stared at Caspian over his shoulder and shook his head. He couldn't even begin to fathom what he was going to do.
"Help." Tohma said, falling back on his last resort. Every time Caspian got involved there was bloodshed, but he was willing to sacrifice a few limbs to solve this particular problem.
Caspian stopped eating the papers and watched Tohma with his head cocked to the side for a few seconds. He scratched himself absentmindedly and continued to watch Tohma. He flew off to his cage and returned a few seconds later dressed in a suit with a small cigarette lodged in his beak. Before speaking, he dimmed the lights.
"We gotta make 'em disappear." Caspian said, narrowing his eyes and waving his wing in Tohma's direction.
"Excuse me?" Tohma asked, not sure what Caspian was getting at.
"Forge' aboud it." Caspian asked, this time laying on a heavy Italian accent.
"Forget about what?" Tohma asked, completely missing the point of Caspian's mobster disguise. Caspian stared at him incredulously for a few beats before Tohma figured it out. "Oh!"
"Took you long enough." Caspian said, tossing the cigarette aside, removing the suit, and restoring the lights. "Just kill them, makes life easier."
"Right, right…" Tohma replied, deep in thought, his villainous streak showing itself. Then, casting a sideways glance at Caspian, "You sure?"
"At this point, it's kill or be killed. If Mika finds out that her prized prince is really a street rat and that you lied about them being dead in the first place she'll finally have a good reason to dispose of you." Caspian responded intelligently. "We need to polish off these rats before Mika finds out the truth."
"But how?" Tohma mused, visualizing several different methods of killing the troublesome thieves.
"Well…there are quite a few possibilities, depending on how creative you want to get…" Caspian said from the desk, looking absolutely murderous. "Decapitation, acid burning, fire, explosives, drowning, oooh, impalement…"
"Easy there, Vlad." Tohma countered quickly, having sudden visions of a grotesque castle in Transylvania. "Those are all too obvious, it has to look like we weren't involved. If Mika thinks we offed her precious prince, we're dead too."
"Hmph. Then what're your ideas, oh brilliant one?" Caspian snapped, not at all happy with the rejection of his ideas.
"We'll have to dispose of the body after we kill him…make Mika think he left…he's disappeared on his retainers before after all…" Tohma muttered. "No body, no evidence."
"Hmm…" Caspian said to himself, mulling over the new possibilities. As long as Mika never found the body, they were home free. Any of his ideas would float the boat.
The duo spent the next fifteen minutes in silence, thinking up different ways to successfully dispose of the body without anyone catching on.
"I've got it!" Caspian shrieked, flapping his wings and sending several pens flying.
"You have, have you?" Tohma asked, rubbing his temples.
"If you're going to be like that then-"
"Caspian."
"Fine. Just get him to the office, I'll take it from there." Caspian replied, looking absolutely evil.
"No, no, no! Not the office! We can't incriminate ourselves like that!" Tohma sputtered.
"Don't worry, don't worry. I have it all worked out…" Caspian said, trying to assure Tohma with a silky voice. "Trust me."
"Casp…"
"Like you've got a better idea…" Caspian returned, flying to his cage. When Tohma didn't reply, he continued. "Exactly. From now on, I'm in charge."
"Great…" Tohma said under his breath, walking over to the cage.
"Listen, here's how it's going to go down…"
"Now remember, you have to be sweet…"
"And say nice things!"
"…no glaring…"
"And smile lots!"
"…try not to twitch too much…"
"And bring him something pretty!"
Yuki was sitting in his chair with his legs crossed, his arms folded, and his eyes closed with the effort of containing himself. He gritted his teeth and hissed a bit, wanting desperately to murder the two numbskulls in front of him.
"Basically, don't be yourself." K said, clapping a hand over Ryuichi's mouth to put a stop to his helpful comments.
"Yeah, Yuki, be Eiri!" Ryuichi chimed in, pushing K's hand away with Kumagoro.
"Stop calling me that!" Yuki spat. He was becoming more irritable by the second and had taken to latching onto the slightest excuse to snap at the other two.
"Take a chill pill." K said matter-of-factly, staring down at Yuki in his chair. "It's your name now, get used to it."
Yuki glared at K as was his custom and hunkered down into his comfy seat. K sighed, and walked across the room towards Yuki, who pulled his feet into the chair with him.
"What did I tell you about the glaring?" K asked quietly to the curled up figure that was Yuki.
Yuki merely glared again, not wanting to give K the satisfaction of an answer. Ryuichi gulped and covered Kuma's eyes. K took a few steps forward and smacked Yuki in the head.
"What the hell was that for!" Yuki yelled, trying to scoot backwards and massaging his head.
"I'll ask you again. What did I tell you about the glaring?" K said, his voice steady. At this rate, Yuki wouldn't last a day in the palace. He had to get the attitude in check.
Yuki again refrained from answering, and K again raised his hand to smack the insolent princeling.
"Alright, alright, you told me not to!" Yuki said, using his arms to shield his head. He could still hear bells from the last blow.
"Good boy." K said, smiling and walking back to the other side of the room.
"Tell him he's pretty, and, and, and be a good guy!" Ryuichi chirped, reverting back to giving Yuki what he considered priceless advice.
"Ryuichi's right, you know." K said smugly, noting Yuki's homicidal expression. "You need to be sweet, charm-"
"I got it already, just shut up!"
"If you blow this, I'm not doing it again." K replied, his expression darkening. "I've worked way too hard for you to screw things up now."
"Whatever."
"I thought I told you to drop the attitude!" K exclaimed, smacking Yuki again. "Follow the rules!"
"Fine, fine, can I go now?" Yuki asked, rubbing his head and staggering out of his chair. Unable to stand the prospect of spending the entire night in the company of Ryuichi and K, he had decided to visit Shuichi.
"Hold your horses, we need to decide on a plan of action…" K said, looking serious and pulling out a map of the palace. "If you go out of this door and then turn left…"
"Ummm…K?" Ryuichi said, waving Kuma's hands. "I think Yuki left…"
"He what?" said K, spinning around and noticing that the door was ajar. "Damn him."
"Finally…" Yuki muttered to the dark hallway. Freedom had never felt so good. He had left the maniacs behind and soon he'd be with Shuichi again.
He had never considered himself a romantic, and in fact he hated the idea of ever becoming one, but he hadn't been able to force the young prince out of his head. It had only been a day since he had met Shuichi, but he had never connected with anyone like that before. Shuichi understood a part of him, he was trapped too. Yuki had never had someone to sympathize with; he had never had someone get so close to him in his entire life.
The thought of seeing him again, of holding him again, of kissing him again propelled him forward. He hadn't the slightest idea of where he was going, but he couldn't afford to ask K for directions now. The fact that he had escaped K unscathed made him extremely happy, and he quickened his pace even more.
The hallways were becoming steadily more decadent and Yuki guessed that he was nearing the royal apartments. He gulped, picturing what would happen if he ended up in the Sultana's room instead. She seemed a bit over-enthusiastic about him, and he wasn't looking forward to meeting her again. He paused, took a deep breath, and tried to get into character. He had to be a perfect prince, it was what Shuichi wanted and what he deserved. He tried to push out all sarcasm and tried to replace it with sincerity, but the process was extremely difficult for him. He shook himself, cleared his throat, and reminded himself to be a prince. If anyone found him out, he would lose Shuichi for good. And if Shuichi didn't like him…
He shuddered, and finished assuming his new role. He continued down the hall, keeping focused on his goal. Voices in the hall ahead, however, stopped him in his tracks, and he dodged behind a large vase to avoid being seen. After a few minutes of crouching in the shadows, the voices never came nearer, and he slowly straightened up to see what was going on.
Two guards were standing at the end of the hallway, one on each side of a large and very decorated door.
"I wonder why the vizier is so paranoid…" said the guard on the right thoughtfully. "We've never been asked to guard the Prince's room before."
"Are you obsessed or something?" said the guard on the left in an exasperated voice. "It's not our job to question orders, just to carry them out."
"I still wanna know why…" said the first guard quietly. "He seemed pretty rushed too."
"Knock it off already."
"But why is he so interested in what Prince Eiri is doing?" the other guard said, unwilling to drop the subject.
"Does it look like I care? Shut up already."
"Fine."
The guards ceased their conversation and Yuki relaxed behind the pillar. He was a bit unnerved that the vizier was having him watched, but he was even more relieved that he had found Shuichi's room. He knew the sentinels ahead were guarding Shuichi's room and reporting to the crazy vizier, but Yuki couldn't imagine that they'd deny him entrance. After all, he was Mika's new golden boy.
He cleared his throat and stepped out from behind the vase. The guards immediately reached for their swords and Yuki felt his confidence draining away.
"And where do you think you're going?" the more serious of the duo asked Yuki in a deep voice.
"To see Shuichi." Yuki answered quickly, realizing too late the mistake of using the prince's first name.
"Who the hell are you to be using his majesty's first name?" asked the second guard, moving to stand in front of the door.
"I'm…I'm Prince Eiri. The Prince's new suitor." Yuki answered, trying to regain his natural self-assurance.
"Trying for some funny business?"
"You dirty old man! Trying to corrupt our little prince!"
"It's not like that!" Yuki interjected quickly, lying through his teeth. His face grew uncharacteristically red as the guards chastised him.
"Sure, sure…" said the Tohma-watcher skeptically. "You keep your hands to yourself mister."
"Wha?" Yuki said, failing to form a sentence. He felt his face, and was surprised to feel how hot it was.
"We won't support your deviant behavior!" screeched Tohma's biggest fan.
"Get back to your suite, princey." the other guard said, making a shooing gesture with his hands. "Unless you want to be eligible for a boy's choir that is…"
Yuki stared incredulously at them for a few beats, but decided to leave after they reached for their swords again. He had rarely been so insulted, or so embarrassed, in his entire life. He made his way back down the hallway and wound through the labyrinth that was the palace until he reached his suite. Sighing heavily, he opened the door and walked in.
"Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in." K said amusedly from a couch. Behind him, the sun burned red.
"KITTY! WHERE?" screamed Ryuichi, suddenly jumping up and running around the room in a panic. "KITTY!"
"Ryuichi, there's no kitty." K said solemnly, not wanting to upset Ryuichi.
"Aww…" Ryuichi replied, hugging Kuma and sitting down on the floor next to the rug, which was sleeping.
"Shot you down, huh?" K asked, turning back to Yuki. "Good one."
"No!" Yuki returned, clearly ruffled. "His room was guarded."
"Uh oh, the ruse is up." K said in mock worry.
"What? How?" Yuki asked, not as quick on the uptake as usual.
"They must have figured it out if they have guards at his room. Must have heard of your…reputation." K said, a huge smile plastered across his face.
"Oh, real mature." Yuki spat back. "And these people are too thick to figure anything out. Especially the vizier."
"Mmm hmm, mmm hmm, then why were there guards?" K questioned, a playful glint in his eyes. "Lying about the guards aren't you?"
"Of course not!"
"Turned on the charm and failed, huh, Yuki?"
"Charm?" Yuki asked, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms. "And there were guards!"
"You know what you are, Casanova." K replied, the huge smile still in place.
"Hmph."
"Alright, Don Juan, let's figure something else out then." K said, now fighting to keep a straight face; Yuki looked like his head might explode.
"Knock it off."
"Okay love doctor."
"K!"
"Yuki's a doctor?" Ryuichi piped up, looking awed.
"Ryuichi, quiet." Yuki snarled, walking towards the door to his bedroom. "I'm going to bed."
"Gasp! Ryuichi, what's that? It's a man, it's a Yuki, no, no, it's a machine!" K called out, pointing excitedly at Yuki. "A love machine!"
"SHUT UP!"
"Whatever you say Captain Debauchery."
"GUARDS! THERE WERE GUARDS!" Yuki screeched, his voice getting dangerously close to cracking again. He turned away from K to prevent himself from committing murder and saw something very interesting.
The suite's window overlooked the palace's courtyard. Yuki hadn't bothered to examine said courtyard when they arrived, but now wished that he had. Directly across the courtyard was a huge balcony. And leaning on the railing was someone very familiar to Yuki.
Shuichi was perched on the balcony, his arms folded on the railing. Below him, an elephant was munching on some leaves, looking contented. Yuki couldn't hear what Shuichi was saying, but he could see his lips moving. Deciding on a new course of action, he cleared his throat and put a hand on the knob of his bedroom door.
"Night, then." Yuki said calmly.
"The old balcony ploy, eh?" K asked, looking past Yuki to the window. "Can't fool me, sir."
"None of your business."
"Cut the crap and get over here. We'll help you this time." K said, grabbing Yuki's shirt and dragging him over to Ryuichi.
"I don't want your help." Yuki replied. "I can handle it myself."
K ignored Yuki's reply and started rummaging around in bag that had suddenly appeared on the table next to him. He pulled out a jumble of wires and threw something at Yuki.
"What the hell is this?" Yuki queried, examining the object that K had chucked at him.
"It's an earpiece. Put it in. I'll get the rest of the equipment started up. Ryuichi, I want you at least five feet away from this at all times, got it?"
"Yes, sir!" Ryuichi answered, getting into the moment.
Yuki looked skeptical, but a warning glance from K made him insert the earpiece. He heard a strange buzzing noise and then nothing. He watched K fiddling around with the wires and started to wonder how he was going to get up on the balcony.
"You read me?" K asked, inserting his own earpiece with an attached microphone.
"Do I read you?" Yuki said, staring at K.
"Apparently you do. All I have to do now is wire you up for sound and you're good to go."
"Any idea how I'm going to scale the walls to the balcony, genius?" Yuki posed offhandedly, not wanting K to realize that he himself had no plan whatsoever.
"Rug Man can help!" Ryuichi suggested energetically while K measured the bouncing man's distance from the pile of wires. "He can fly you up there!"
"No way!" Yuki yelled, jumping away from Ryuichi and the sleeping rug.
At this, the rug woke up and started to slap Ryuichi about the head with its tassels. Yuki snickered, and the rug turned on him, beating him in the head and punching every inch of the street rat turned prince that it could reach.
"Easy Rug Man! You don't have to help!" Ryuichi said loudly, massaging his head.
"Calm down, dude…" K said, trying to pull the rug off of Yuki and getting kicked in the stomach in return. He toppled backwards and landed with a loud 'thump' in his gaggle of wires.
"Leave me alone you insane throw rug!" Yuki bellowed, trying to slap the rug away. Across the courtyard, Shuichi said goodnight to Cinda and went into his room. "I don't want your help anyway!"
This comment seemed to spur the rug on, and it proceeded to pull Yuki's hair and pummel him thoroughly. Yuki tried to throw the rug off, but he couldn't get a tight enough hold. He even tried biting one of the tassels, but the rug countered by ripping out a lock of Yuki's hair.
"OWW! WHAT THE –"
"Love and peace! Stop fighting!" Ryuichi called from the sidelines while K tried fruitlessly to untangle himself from the wires.
The rug ignored Ryuichi and instead intensified its attack on Yuki. It hadn't quite forgiven him for giving it the slip earlier, and the two had never gotten along. The rug hated Yuki's smug attitude, and was ready to continue the earlier battles from inside the cave. It continued to pull Yuki's hair and when Yuki succeeded in ripping a few threads from a tassel, it tickled his ears so furiously that Yuki fell to his knees laughing. Sensing victory, the rug flew off, hovering around the ceiling.
"Wow, he can laugh." K said, having finally extricated himself from his equipment. "Who would've known."
"Shut…it…" Yuki gasped between spasms of laughter, trying to regain his composure. After a couple minutes of sputtering, the laughter stopped completely. "How am I going to get onto the balcony? I'm not using…that." He motioned toward the hovering rug.
"I don't know, I'll think of something, I still need to wire you." K replied, walking over to Yuki and lifting up his shirt.
"Hey!"
"Quiet, just gotta attach this to your shirt."
"You should apologize to Rug Man, Yuki." Ryuichi said, pointing to the angry rug flying around on the ceiling. At this suggestion, it made a very rude tassel gesture at Yuki.
"Yeah right." Yuki spat at the rug, returning the gesture with one of his own. "I'm running out of time. I'll figure something out on my own."
"Watch out for any guards…" K whispered, wanting to antagonize in secret.
"Watch it." Yuki replied, glaring over his shoulder and dropping out of the room's window.
"No glaring!" K said as Yuki's head disappeared from view.
Now that my Dante costume is almost done and debuted, I have a lot of extra time and creative juice on my hands so I'm dedicated to getting this behemoth finished up. I've tried to tighten it up and cut out some of the random crap that my fingers seem to love to type, but I've had no luck (obviously ^^). Hope you don't mind, but if you're still reading this, you probably don't…woo, I be a ramblin'. Caspian's just bathed and wants to get back to work, so I'm out.
I swear on the bird's head (which is nice and shiny now) that Yuki and Shuichi will see each other again in the next part of this chapter. See, see, I didn't technically lie last time around. It'll just happen in Chapter 14 Part B. Yay for sneakiness.
-Amaya and the squeaky clean conure