EDITED..

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DISCLAIMER: Song: Almost lover by: A Fine Frenzy

AlMoST-LoVeR

Your fingertips across my skin

I miss that. I miss the way you felt, the way we felt. All the times we spent together. All the moments...didn't that mean anything to you?
Didn't I?
I want to be so sure about these things; that you cared. But I guess I would never know. How could you do this to me? Weren't you happy?
Was all that we did worthless?

The palm trees swaying in the wind; Images

They pass by in a blur; so messy I don't even remember some. But I do remember. How could I forget?
I remember the way you would only smile at me. They way you made me feel special; wanted even. But most of all, I remember the way you said you love me;
And you would never do anything to hurt me...

You sang me Spanish lullabies; The sweetest sadness in your eyes

Almost is the word I use. We almost finished high school.We almost started a life. We were almost there!But now, It's just me. I'm almost finishing high school. I'm almost starting a life. I'm almost there...

Clever trick;

So many people are missing you, and that makes me wish that I was there for you. That I could touch you again. That I can embrace you and never let go. There's one question I have...Why?
What was so horrible. What was so bad that you couldn't control it?
That you couldn't tell me?

Well, I never want to see you unhappy; I thought you'd want the same for me

I never liked you when you were in your trance. When you stop talking...to me at least. When there's no reason, you just tune everyone out.
Until I bring you back to reality. Back to what was originally happening. To where we were. And you'd just mumbled "Sorry"
But that was before I knew you. Before I fell in love.

Goodbye, my almost lover; Goodbye, my hopeless dream

These tears; the ones in my eyes, The eyes you used to stare into.
Before you were gone, and left me. Before you did something so dreadful. It was such a normal day for me. Normal until your brother called.
He told me you weren't going to be at school anymore,
you weren't going to be here at all. The reason being you did something severe. Your brother told me, that it was going to be even more quieter at your house. And even though he kept your room untouched; It still will never be the same again.

I'm trying not to think about you; Can't you just let me be?

Walking down the halls, it's so damn quiet!
Laughter giving me migraines. Stupid people doing the stupid things I did years ago. When I was a freshman. At lunch, the seat next to me is empty. In science, my partner isn't there. I walk home, alone. Imagining you with me. You laughing with me. You walking all the way to my house with me, even though you live three blocks down.
The house next to mine, it's so silent. Although I don't wanna look at it.
The old man lives there, the stingy one. The one that's house gets toilet papered every year around homecoming.

So long, my luckless romance

You shot me; Or it seems like it. I know your parents weren't that great, And we didn't have that many true friends. I even understand that you, most of all, wanted a way out. I do too. But now-I'm at the beginning again. Sharing my loneliness with nothing but air. No one to talk to, no one to cry to. No on at all. I am nothing again...

My back is turned on you

I want to visit your family so much. To tell them how sorry I feel for what has happened. But I can't do it!
They look too much like you. And I can't take it!
Do you know how much i'm hurting?
How much your family is hurting?
They've realized how hard they were on you. How stress could cause so many things. They miss you... I do too.

Should've known you'd bring me heartache

Each day afterschool, i'm visiting you. Maybe one day...you'll give me some kind of sign. To answer my questions?
To stop making me wonder so damn much?
Please, One sign as to why; Why you had to hurt yourself?
To hurt me? Your family?
Still, no signs appear. You've never been stupid, you were always smart. Witty even. I always thought how amazing you were. How you could never do anything wrong. But this...Is wrong.
It's totally, horribly wrong.

Almost lovers always do

I remember the day when I was the new kid, and when we accidentally collided in the hallway. You didn't like me at first. I'm sure you didn't like a lot of people. But I knew, you were hiding something. You acted so bold but really, on the inside, you were hurting. You wanted to be loved, or to be known by anyone but stereotypes. You wanted to be your own person. With your own goals. I noticed that about you.

We walked along a crowded street, You took my hand and danced with me

That first day, in the rain. The moment that was most precious to me. The one that would stick in my mind until death. Because you helped me then. Helped me realize, that even myself was hurting. That my tears were important, Because you never wanted me to shed one again. Although, I did. You just assured me. You, who was known to hate everyone. You figured me out before even I could. Before I knew.

Images,

And we kissed right there, in the rain. We were together after those days. If I was somewhere, that's where you were. If you were somewhere that's where I was. We ate lunch together, closing off other connection-and I guess that's one of the things I regret. The little friends I met on the first day, don't talk to me now.
They stopped talking to me awhile ago, when I started dating you. Because they said you were frightening. That you didn't care about anyone. That you would just hurt me. But I just continued ignoring them.

And when you left, you kissed my lips; You told me you would never, never forget, These images

I was so convinced it wasn't the way you were, In love?... I thought I was. But now, I have no idea what I was. What I am. I cry so much.
Sometimes for you. Sometimes for your family. Sometimes, for no reason at all. Tears are my new best friends. And the sad thing is...I don't even know why. I didn't want them.

Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy, I thought you'd want the same for me

Emotions-The part of the consciousness that involves feeling.
Sad-Sorrowful or mournful.
Wreck-to cause the ruin or destruction of,
Am I all of these?
I thought I knew what all these words meant. But it wasn't until I actually start feeling them that I figured it out. I do have all these emotions. I am sad. Most of all, I am a wreck. Have I always been like this?
Or did I not feel this until after the call. After the shock.

Goodbye, my almost lover,Goodbye, my hopeless dream

I'm crying. And I know; for another night, I won't be able to sleep again. You're on my mind. And you wont leave!
No matter how much I want to forget. No matter how much I try, you're there. Everywhere I turn; you're on their faces. In the cars. Walking on the street. I can't forget you...

I'm trying not to think about you,Can't you just let me be?

Are you happy?
Is this what you wanted. Me-to feel horrible about this.
Your family to feel horrible?
Please. Just please. Tell me why?

So long, my luckless romance,My back is turned on you

I want to hate you. Hate you so much. I want to ignore the dreams of you. Ignore the voices in my head. Ignore everything.

Should've known you'd bring me heartache

I CAN'T do this. I CAN'T stay here. Everything here. Reminds me of you. The first thought in the morning?
Always thinking about what you're up to.
Where you are?
How it's like. Sometimes I want what you have. Sometimes I want to be dead.

Almost lovers always do

To say I tried would be an understatement.
I could have succeeded. Only If your brother wasn't there.
He came to see if I was alright.
Then he realized that I wasn't.
He saw the marks on my arms and he saw the dark gashes. He saw me in my bathroom soaked in my own blood. And, he helped me..
He didn't understand what I wanted. He doesn't know it would've helped me. You see, this was all to rid me from the pain. The pain of missing you.

I can not go to the ocean, I can not drive the street at night

I AM CRAZY. I AM INSANE. I MISS YOU.
I write these sentences over and over again. Into my arm.
Until I couldn't write them anymore. It will be branded into my body.
It will be branded into my head. It will never escape.
It is there...

I cannot wake up in the morning, without you on my mind.

I need some kind of sign.
Some sign that your still there. Something to tell me; You Still Care. That you miss me as much as I miss you. That you feel lost, like me

So your gone and I'm haunted, and I bet you are just fine

I want them away from me. I want them to stop saying that it's okay. That they understand what I'm going through. I don't want them ignoring me again. Avoiding me. I WANT MY OLD LIFE BACK!
I want you back

Did I make it that easy to walk right in and out, of my life.

I'm not sure where I'm going, or if I'm going on. But there's one thing I must face: Your gone

Goodbye, my almost lover Goodbye, my hopeless dream I'm trying not to think about you Can't you just let me be?

And you can never be with me...

So long, my luckless romance My back is turned on you Should've known you'd bring me heartache Almost lovers always do

But that doesn't stop the pain.

AlMoST-LoVeR

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