"Tohma, Tohma, Tohma!" Caspian shrieked, blasting into the office. "Big stuff! Stuff!"
"Take a chill pill…" Tohma sighed, leaning back into his couch and readjusted the cool rag he had on his forehead. He'd changed into his bathrobe and slippers, ready to relax for the day. Getting beamed by the infamous bunny had really done a number on him.
"We don't have time for that!" Caspian shouted at Tohma, landing on his head and yanking out the nearest hairs. "Get up, get up!"
"What, what? Alright, get off, BIRD!" Tohma squalled, slapping Caspian away and yelling when the bird bit one of his fingers in his excitement. "CALM YOURSELF CASPIAN!"
"I can't! This is huge!"
"Spit it out, then!" Tohma said exasperatedly, sucking his bloody thumb.
"The genie and the lamp are one, he's in it now! And he and that street rat had a huge fight! And we need to get in there!" Caspian belted out at turbo speed, assaulting Tohma with his mess of words. "Move it, man! It's our chance, that genie is on lock-down mode and he's mad enough that he won't come to the rat's rescue!"
"Caspo, slow down." Tohma told Caspian calmly, afraid that the bird might explode. He sat up and snapped into planning mode. This unprecedented turn of events had inspired him. "We need to think this through, we can't afford to blow this chance by being impulsive."
"Tohma, no! We have to go now, we have to move, we have to-"
Tohma reached over to where Caspian was perched and smacked him, knocking him out of his frenzy.
"Thanks, I needed that." Caspian admitted, bobbing up and down slowly.
"Yeah, you did." Tohma agreed, giving Caspian a quick scratch on his cheek. "Listen, I say we do things my way this time. No blood, no murder, no weapons, no vegetables…"
"Uh uh, that carrot was your idea maestro." Caspian said, stretching out his wings and yawning. "And I already curtailed myself during my spying expedition, I'm not doing it again."
"You can eat their livers once we have the lamp." Tohma reassured the bird, wondering what else he might have to bargain in order to win over the parrot.
"I don't eat livers, you nincompoop."
"What about that time in Fiji?"
"Tohma! You promised, that stays in the vault!" Caspian screeched, flying off to his cage in a huff.
"Alright, easy bird, we need to figure this out. Mika's conference is set for tonight, and we need to have that lamp before then. She might ramp up security on the imposter once he's officially going to be family. Plus, it'll make a great entrance." Tohma thought aloud, pacing around the office slowly with his eyes partially closed. He hadn't been able to exercise his devious side in quite a while, as he'd been allowing Caspian to drive for the last few escapades, and he was reveling in it.
"You and your entrances…" Caspian muttered, flopping into his water bowl and sighing contentedly. He hadn't bathed in days and it felt excellent to have the water seeping into his feathers.
"We need to show up and be diplomatic. No more assassination attempts, just civility." Tohma pressed on, ignoring Caspian's slight. When the bird made no response and continued wallowing in his make-shift bathtub, Tohma attempted to win him over. "For me, at least."
Caspian perked up instantaneously, splashing his side of the office with bathwater.
"I don't have to be a nice bird?" Caspian asked expectantly, visions of axes and fire dancing through his head.
"No, I don't think so..." Tohma mused aloud. Once he'd silenced his Caspian-inspired bloodthirsty side, his mind had reverted back to its usual genius. "I think you should work on getting the lamp while I keep him distracted. Is that short maniac still there?"
"The Prince?"
"No, his twin."
"Oh, right, yeah, he split." Caspian answered, scratching himself slowly.
"Good, one less thing to worry about." Tohma said, repressing a shudder when he thought of the savage Kumagoro. "This is what I'm thinking: I'll keep the street rat focused on me, and you sneak in and snag the lamp."
"What happens when something goes wrong? Something always goes wrong…" Caspian asked, ruffling up his feathers to dry off.
"We need some sort of signal, a code word, something…" Tohma said, stroking his boa thoughtfully. "We need a word that'll grab our attention…"
"Hot pink feather boa?" Caspian suggested, ducking behind a food bowl for protection against potential projectiles.
"I…uh…donuts?" Tohma attempted sarcastically, failing miserably in his endeavor to wound the conure, who was now bobbing up and down and repeating 'donuts' as fast as he could.
"Later, we'll have victory donuts later." Tohma offered, trying to pacify the frantic bird. "Wait…"
"What?" Caspian queried, filing away a mental note concerning late-night donuts. As soon as Mika gave him his kitchen key, he was pretty sure he'd have his cage moved there to make things easier for him when he had eaten enough to prevent flight.
"Banana." Tohma said softly, smiling at Caspian. "This all started with a banana, it'll end with one."
"How…symbolic…" Caspian managed, wondering why they couldn't have a cool code word like 'impale'.
"Exactly." Tohma continued, oblivious to Caspian's obvious dissatisfaction. "I think that's all we need. If either one of us gets into trouble, we'll yell 'banana' and the other one will provide the assist."
"What if one of us feels the need to bravely run away?"
"You're not leaving me in there, Caspian!"
"I was talking about you, captain fierce."
"Caspian, this is a team effort." Tohma said, jaw clenched.
"Then make sure you can hold it together."
"Listen, conure, I'll be fine. When we get in there, you have to behave yourself. Just steal the lamp, no toe removal procedures, no dive-bombing, no yelling, and if you see a donut, look away." Tohma listed out on his fingers, glaring at his insolent parrot.
"As long as I get one later…" Caspian said under his breath, stretching and flapping his wings to get rid of all the excess water from his bath. "Well, let's get going."
"Give me a second, I need to change." Tohma said to Caspian, wandering over to his closet and rifling through his vast collection of clothes.
"Of course, how could I forget, you have to look your best when committing a felony." Caspian jabbed from his cage, preening while Tohma muttered incoherently and got dressed.
"Alright, let's move. That conference is getting closer, we can't afford to lose this chance." Tohma said seriously, shrugging into a nicer trench coat and fluffing up his boa. "Ready?"
"I was born ready…" Caspian replied in a gritty tone, narrowing his eyes and nodding slowly at Tohma.
After spending fifteen more minutes wallowing in self-pity intermixed with random spurts of denial, Yuki was being proactive. He'd written up pros and cons lists for both choices, pulled out any supporting evidence, and, even though he had all the paperwork in the world to support either, he still couldn't make a choice.
He'd moved on to silent prayer and deep breathing exercises, thinking that maybe some deity interfering might not be so bad. He'd locked himself into his room at the start of his layout process, and he'd started to feel claustrophobic almost immediately. He'd grown accustomed to Shuichi's room, with its large windows and balcony. He sighed, trying not to think of Shuichi, and shuffled over to his own little window.
From his high vantage point, he could see most of Agrabah, and the city looked lovely in the late afternoon sun. The light was reflecting off of roofs and hanging sheets, and it gave the town a warm glow. Yuki searched until he found the general area that he and Ryuichi had lived in, and suddenly his decision was made for him.
When he laid eyes on his old hovel, the overwhelming desire to be back there overtook him. He could feel it throbbing through him, and he gasped with the pain of it. He kept looking at the city, and that only solidified his choice; he had to leave.
He missed his old life more than anything, and nothing would ever change that. He couldn't stand being trapped in the palace, feeling like someone's puppet in a sick marionette routine. Eventually, it would have worn him down. He should've known that staying was never an option, he wouldn't have been able to take it forever. Somewhere down the road, he would've packed up and left. He sighed, and resigned himself to the fact that this was better for Shuichi anyway. It was better to hurt him early than to abandon him years down the line.
His entire life, he'd wished for a fortune, and now that he had one staring him in the face, all he wanted to do was run from it. His mind was reeling from the realization, and it was hard for him to understand why it'd reached this decision. He had everything he ever wanted in the palace, and he was about to walk away from it.
He swallowed hard, trying to derive some counter-argument, but nothing came to mind. All he could see, all he could think about, was his old house and how much he'd rather be there than here. The best situation would've been to take Shuichi with him, but that couldn't happen. The Sultana would never let him leave.
At that thought, the guilt came flooding back and he squeezed his eyes shut to stop the images of Shuichi's crying face that were overtaking his mind. He knew how selfish he was being by leaving Shuichi behind to a life that he hated, but he couldn't stay here, he couldn't live like this, even with Shuichi. He sighed angrily and opened his eyes again, wishing desperately that there was another way. Now that he had his decision, he wasn't sure if he'd be able to go through with it.
"I can't tell him goodbye…" Yuki murmured, surprised when he felt the unfamiliar burn of tears. He knew without a doubt that he wouldn't be able to make it through that without breaking down or doing something that he would regret.
He thought about the other options for explaining himself, but they all seemed too impersonal. He hated leaving things like they were, but they way he saw it, he had no other choice.
"I hate this…" Yuki whispered, his voice cracking. He sucked in some air to calm down and mentally prepared himself for what he had to do.
He tore his eyes away from the glowing skyline and started picking up his papers. He tore up the ones that outlined all the good and bad reasons for staying with Shuichi, throwing them into the nearest lamp. From the other stack he grabbed the documents that Tohma had given him outside of the cave. Even though they weren't signed, he could use them as blackmail against Tohma to get amnesty for himself as he was pretty sure Ryuichi had his in the bag.
Yuki grabbed the lamp from his bedside table and moved into the main room, setting everything in neat little pile on the couch. He'd already moved the rest of his belongings to Shuichi's room, and he was debating how much they were worth to him when he noticed the darkening sky out of his window. He'd wasted too much time admiring the city, and now he would have to rush to make it out of the palace before someone came to get him for Mika's dreaded announcement. He gathered up the papers and the lamp, but before he could stow them away, a knock interrupted him.
"Hello? Hello in there!" Tohma called enthusiastically, tapping on the door.
"What the hell…?" Yuki said quietly, walking slowly towards the door. He put the papers and lamp on an end table and continued edging forward. "Tohma?"
Yuki inched closer to the door, analyzing it skeptically. Any time Tohma was involved always ended badly for him, and he didn't have a magic genie to save him if things got out of hand. K was hunkered down in his lamp, and Yuki was pretty sure that he wasn't coming out in the near future.
"It's rude to ignore a guest!" Tohma sang out, drumming out a beat on the door to further annoy the room's inhabitant.
"Go away." Yuki said simply, deciding to take the high road. Sure, he could try to assassinate the vizier and end this cat and mouse game, but if he was leaving, he needed the platinum fool to secure his amnesty.
"Oh, come now, friend, let's play nice." Tohma suggested, nudging the door with his foot.
Yuki ignored the overwhelmingly impulse to inform Tohma that they were not friends and offer him a better descriptor. He kept his mouth firmly shut and leaned against the wall next to the door, trying to wait out the muttering vizier.
After ten minutes, it was clear that this plan was not going to work.
"OI! I'm still out here!" Tohma yelled, kicking the door. He'd abandoned all attempts at niceties five minutes ago when the street rat had used a few choice words to shoo him off.
"I'm well aware."
"Open the door!"
"No."
"Or else."
"Or else what?"
"Or else I'll go tell Mika that you're planning on running away."
"Dammit…" Yuki hissed under his breath. He had no idea how long Caspian had been in the suite, and he must have overheard the entirety of his fight with K. "Fine, fine…"
"Hmph." Tohma returned, holding his head up and high-stepping across the threshold. "See now, wasn't that easy?"
"Cut to the chase." Yuki told Tohma, shutting the door firmly behind the vizier, but not before Caspian scuttled in and hid behind a potted ficus.
"Well I just wanted to offer my congratulations, I heard about the engagement." Tohma said smoothly, surreptitiously glancing around the room for his parroty accomplice.
"Whatever. You done now?" Yuki spat, avoiding eye contact. He didn't want to let Tohma in on anymore than he already knew.
"No, no, of course not! We have so much to discuss."
"No, we don't." Yuki said, waving his hands. The last thing he needed was Tohma hindering his escape.
"Listen, street rat, sit. We have unfinished business. I know you have that lamp, I know that your little assistant is the genie, and all I have to do is have a conversation with Mika. Don't push me."
"Then go talk to her, just get it over with already." Yuki challenged, knowing full well that Tohma was bluffing. If it was that simple, he would've gone to the Sultana ages ago instead of trying to kill him secretly.
"I…" Tohma stammered, cursing his big mouth. He hadn't intended on making empty threats, and he hadn't thought that one through. Of course he couldn't go tell Mika what was really happening, she'd never believe him. She'd kill him, research it herself, discover that he was right, and then believe him, but by then he'd be headless.
"Well, go on." Yuki pushed, flopping onto a couch and smirking at Tohma.
Caspian took the momentary distraction to dash out from behind the potted plant. He skittered around the edge of the room making sure to stay well-hidden in the shadows.
"Let's not involve Mika in something we can handle ourselves. I merely wanted to, as I said, congratulate you on your upcoming nuptials." Tohma said in an attempt to smooth things over.
"Then get lost, you've already done that twice now." Yuki told Tohma with a frustrated tone, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling. "And if you're not going to do anything about it, which you obviously aren't, then there was no point, and is not point, in discussing the lamp or the genie."
"That's my lamp!" Tohma squalled, losing his temper and stepping towards Yuki. "You stole it!"
"Correction, Ryuichi stole it. I merely aided and abetted."
"Tohma…" Caspian muttered, searching for the lamp a little more frantically than before. Tohma was losing it, and it was up to him to end this mission before anyone died.
He scanned the room from the corner and uttered a string of expletives under his breath when he found it. The lamp was sitting on an end table beside the street rat's couch. He stayed still for a few seconds, trying to figure out his next course of action. Before he could decide on a reasonable course of action, however, Tohma started twitching and he knew he had to move no matter what.
"You…you…" Tohma stalled, clenching his jaw in an effort to control his tongue. He balled his hands into fists and gurgled, glaring at the lounging street rat, who was smiling at him amusedly.
Tohma puffed out his chest and averted his eyes, unable to take what Yuki was dishing out. As soon as he looked away from the gloating faker, he noticed Caspian jumping up and down on the floor, desperately trying to hook his beak on the bottom shelf of the end table holding the lamp. Seeing their plan unraveling yet again snapped Tohma out of his funk and he quickly formulated a plan of action. He had to distract Yuki away from the end table long enough for Caspian to steal the lamp.
"This has gone on long enough…just get out." Yuki told Tohma exasperatedly. He'd watched the vizier twitch and stammer for a few minutes, and the fun of it all was quickly wearing off. He didn't think Tohma would back off if he threatened him, and he knew that calling the guards would be pointless. By the time they showed up, it would probably be time for the conference. His only option was to bluff with K, and he sincerely hoped that Caspian had neglected to tell Tohma about the ending of the fight. "Get out or I'll have to call the genie."
"Yeah, right, after that little fight? I don't think so street rat." Tohma sneered, waggling his head from side to side and ruffling up his boa. The more dramatic, the more incensed Yuki would eventually be, and that would give Caspian more time to pull off the heist.
"Damn…" Yuki muttered, glaring at Tohma. His plan had backfired, and now he was the one looking like a royal fool. He bit his tongue to keep quiet and debated the merits of killing Tohma and forgoing his amnesty. The way he saw it, it just might be worth the risk.
"Gotcha…" Caspian murmured, finally scrambling onto the bottom shelf. Tohma was still fluffing himself, looking entirely too pleased.
Caspian made quick work of the shelf and was soon peering over the edge of the table, watching Yuki's every move. If the street rat were to catch on, they might actually die.
"Anything else to threaten me with? Hiding any other mythical creatures under a rug or something?" Tohma asked Yuki seriously, nodding sympathetically when Yuki glared at him. "Thought so."
"I don't need the genie to deal with you." Yuki growled, launching off of the couch and advancing on Tohma.
"Don't make me get violent!" Tohma screeched, his voice a few pitches higher than normal.
Yuki didn't answer Tohma's weak command and kept moving towards the vizier, not caring one bit that he'd have to live his entire life on the run for what he was about to do. It would all be worth it.
As soon as Yuki was focused enough on Tohma, Caspian swung himself onto the shelf and made a run for the lamp, not entirely sure what he was going to do once he got a hold of it. He wrapped his talons around one of the gems but quickly lost his grip and started cursing under his breath. He tried grabbing the trigger guard next, followed soon after by an attempt on the handle.
"Dammit…" Caspian murmured, restraining himself from kicking the lamp. As tempting as it was, he'd broken enough toes to know better.
He gave up trying to lift the lamp and resorted to pushing it around feebly on the table, wondering if he could get it to the edge and if Yuki would notice when he did. The street rat was currently occupied with cornering Tohma, something that was much easier said than done. He threw all of his body weight against the lamp and grunted, trying desperately to scoot it to the edge of the table. If he could somehow signal to Tohma to make a loud noise or some other such distraction, he could chuck it off the edge and then try his luck with stealing it.
Once he had the lamp in position, he clambered on top of it and tried jumping up and down to catch Tohma's eye.
"There's no need for violence, I just wanted to have a nice little chat!" Tohma squealed, pelting around a few potted plants to confuse his rabid pursuer.
"NO! STOP RUNNING SO I CAN KILL YOU!" Yuki roared, ripping off his shoe and throwing it at Tohma.
Caspian continued his jumping, wishing that Yuki would move and stop blocking Tohma. If he didn't get the lamp soon, then the plan was going to fail. Yuki didn't have the longest fuse, and it was even shorter in the presence of Tohma. Caspian stopped jumping and quickly considered his other options.
"Any last words?" Yuki panted, having finally trapped Tohma in a corner of the suite.
Tohma's eyes got wider by the second as he desperately searched for a way out. The entire idea had been to keep Yuki calm and that had clearly backfired. Caspian hadn't gotten anywhere near the door and Yuki was not making things easy.
"Guess not." Yuki said, cracking his knuckles and moving in for the kill.
"FRUIT LOOPS!" Caspian screamed, losing it in the moment. As much as Tohma drove him crazy, he was the supplier of the food stuffs and he desperately needed a diversion to save his skin. "FRUIT LOOPS!"
"What the hell?" Yuki asked, spinning around and laying eyes on the feathered varmint.
"Po, wrong word!" Tohma said exasperatedly, smacking his forehead into his palm and completely forgetting about the murderous street rat in front of him. "Caspian, you have to pay more attention- CASPIAN! BANANA!"
Yuki had changed directions almost instantly, panicking when he saw what Caspian was standing on. If the lamp fell into his claws or Tohma's gloves, he was doomed. Forget getting out of the palace without Shuichi knowing; if he lost the lamp, his life was over.
"BIRD!" Yuki yelled, catapulting over the couch and continuing his agitated beeline towards Caspian.
"BANANA! BANANA!" Caspian screeched, frantically trying to fly with his feet still clutching the heavy lamp. "BANANA!"
"Caspian!" Tohma called out, flooded with worry for his bird. Acting on instinct, he threw himself at the street rat and took hold soon as he reached him.
"GET OFF!" Yuki yelled, swatting backwards at Tohma and spinning to throw the vizier off.
"Run for it Casp!"
"I CAN'T! WE DON'T THE LAMP!" Caspian bellowed at Tohma, puffing up to maximum capacity in a parrot-contrived attempt to scare off Yuki.
Tohma held on for dear life while Yuki did a few more haphazard spins and let the overworked wheels in his head turn. He had to get to the lamp, Caspian couldn't manage on his own.
"Gotcha…" Tohma whispered, landing on another hare-brained scheme. He waited for Yuki to take a breather and jammed his thumbs into the street rat's eyes. Once the street rat was blinded, he kicked off of the nearest bit of furniture and started steering the cursing princeling towards the lamp and the puffed up conure.
"OUCH! STOP IT!" Yuki screamed, trying to fall to his knees to bring Tohma down but immediately ceased his efforts when Tohma started kicking him in the back of the knees.
"Just a bit farther…" Caspian said quietly, waiting with bated breath. As soon as Tohma got closer, he was going to join the attack. He couldn't risk leaving the lamp or he would've already been scuttling down Yuki's shirt with some questionable motives.
"NOW!" Tohma signaled Caspian, sensing the bird's desire to feast. He jumped backwards off of Yuki and grabbed the lamp. Once he had it secured he ran pell-mell for the door, wanting only the sweet, sweet victory of freedom.
Caspian didn't answer and instead flew into Yuki's face, flapping violently.
"NO!" Yuki yelled, swatting Caspian out of the air with a lucky shot. He couldn't see what was happening, but Tohma's victory whoops could only mean one thing. "TOHMA!"
Caspian recovered in midair and flew after his owner, cackling insanely.
Yuki stumbled after the duo, trying to make out the room but only bringing up fuzzy outlines. He staggered out into the hallway and lumbered after the sound of Caspian's cackling, wishing that the vizier had done anything but blind him.
"Dammit…" Yuki cursed under his breath, stumbling down the hallway.
Caspian's laughter was fading fast and he knew that it would be hopeless to try to follow them. They'd have K on their side soon and he'd be no match in his best condition, let alone like this. He stopped and swayed on the spot, feeling lightheaded. He tried to sort out his priorities, and he tried to quiet the panic that was rising in his chest. Now that Tohma and Caspian had the lamp, he had to move quickly. He had to leave the palace or he was finished. He had no idea if they'd let him be if he managed to escape, but it was worth a shot.
He tried to navigate his way back to the suite, but he was completely disoriented. The floor was the same color as the ceiling and the walls, and he had no idea how he was going to find his way back.
"I think it's this way…" Yuki muttered. Using his instincts, he turned to his right and promptly face-planted into the wall, knocking himself unconscious.
FINALLY! VICTORY IS MINE! Well, Tohma and Caspian's at least…so, so, so, so sorry it took me this long to update. I got really distracted with the aftermath of Naka-Kon and actually landed myself a real person job. Plus my last class started late this semester, and it kinda coincided with a bunch of other occurrences. Basically, sorry, I'll try harder, and the story is reaching its conclusion…hopefully.
In other news, if anyone attended Naka-Kon, I was the female Dante charging around with Lady, Vergil, and Jareth the Goblin King. Oh, guess I was Sarah from the Labyrinth on Friday night…forgot about that costume. Just a random tidbit.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter,
Amaya