Ianto Jones wasn't sure when he had woken, he was just sure that he was in a lot of pain and he was completely blind. He was filled with momentary panic before his other senses kicked in and he heard a faint click or drip, he also smelled fish and chips which had his stomach growling before it lurched with another stab of pain. He attempted to feel around him with his hands but the action proved to be more trouble than it was worth because as soon as his fingers twitched it hurt like someone had chopped them off.
Slowly, he moved each finger and toe, the stabs of pain told him they were at least still there partially, and when he wiggled his ears he noticed the trickle of blood down the side of his cheek and realized he was apparently lying face down on something furry. He attempted to speak but his mouth was dry and caked with a substance that had long since hardened leaving him a small hole with which to breath. So, he was blind, speechless, couldn't move, and the only thing he seemed to be able to focus on was the fact that he hadn't cleaned the coffee pot with vinegar the night before. Or at least he hoped it was the night before, he wasn't entirely sure how long he had been out.
He sighed, attempting to think of what had happened just before he arrived at his current position. The last thing he remembered was talking to Gwen in the archives and unless she had attacked him when he turned around, he wasn't sure how he ended up here. Something moved and he heard it shuffle before skittering off in the distance, suddenly, the many things he had heard over the years from dead bodies came rushing back to him. There's nothing… could that mean the blindness? And something moving in the dark? He shuddered and his entire body screamed at him to stop, which he promptly retorted inwardly that he's not the one in control at that moment and then stopped himself from going crazy enough to talk to his own body. It was a very probable outcome that he had died and he had lost all memory of the event and was now just sitting, or rather, lying on his stomach listening to something moving with a soft rustle somewhere in the darkness that had enveloped him.
He closed his unseeing eyes to rest yet he wouldn't slip into that blissful state of unconsciousness, instead he was left to ponder exactly what was in the area around him and how long would it be until he was eaten or tortured. He thought about Lisa, the way her hair was so soft right after a shower and how easily it slipped through his hands, how Jack had helped him move through the depression of losing her. He had never once told Ianto to move on, to forget her; but, told him to remember and never forget her, to keep her close but not stop moving forward. That if you stopped to look back, you wouldn't see the miracle around the next corner. How he wished for Jack's presence at that moment, to hear that voice tell him he was being weak and that as a Torchwood agent he should be used to waking up in a strange place. And yet, he felt the warm trickle across his nose and realized he was crying, not because it hurt or he had reached a point where it was all too much to bare; but because if this was the end, he wouldn't see Jack. He wouldn't be able to tell the man the words he had denied him, wouldn't be able to kiss him one last time. He also knew Jack would be guilty, guilty because after spending the night with that whore of a woman, Ianto was most likely gone and there hadn't been that finality to it all. There hadn't been the calm before the storm, just one day there, the other gone. He wouldn't wish that on his lover and he almost hoped Gwen would be some comfort, the twinge of jealousy and defeat rushed over him a little more than he cared to admit.
Gwen, with her doe eyes and heart on her sleeve, her curvy hips and smart mouth, all things Jack had admired about her and all things Ianto had, at one time, despised her for having. All the little glances, all the touches, brushes of hands and fingertips, the way Jack would smell her hair when he was leaning over her desk… all pointed to the fact that they were pulled to each other. But Jack would never act on it, Gwen was more than a lover, he respected her more than that and Ianto was jealous of it. He had been a pity fuck that just became the norm, a broken shell of a man that the other wanted to piece back together. A project to pass the time. He wouldn't lie to himself, there would be some tears over his death but Jack wasn't known to mourn over a lovers demise, tears yes but he'd never be mentioned again. Maybe there was a picture the other man would take out and smile fondly over before flipping to another, smiling, flipping; until the pictures were gone and he'd stuff them back in the worn box and then into the secret compartment in the third drawer. A box of passed loves that had made the sleepless nights fun, but once the picture was gone, he'd be forgotten.
Ianto felt a sob tear from his throat, harsh and he coughed the dried bits in his mouth out onto the floor, his teeth crunching the hard pieces like shrapnel in his mouth and he felt himself choking as he took another deep breath. He went on like that for several moments before his saliva began working and he felt some of the bits dissolve, revealing the substance in his mouth to be dried blood. As bad as the thought was, he hoped it was mostly his own, the mere image of ingesting possible alien blood nearly made him gag if he had the energy. He wanted to reach out, feel whatever he was lying on in hopes that he could garner some thought as to where he was, but the act of coughing up his own blood made him physically and mentally exhausted. Somewhere, deep down, he was a little worried and more than a little on the losing it side; he wasn't used to this part of the job. He had only signed on to be a tea boy, a butler, nothing more than that and yet Jack had pushed him into a more active roll after Lisa. He had told him it was so he would feel more included but even then Ianto knew it was an offensive measure, you were less likely to betray someone if you were close to them. They didn't want another cyber man in the basement scare.
Damage control. Even then the thought made the welsh wince, that's all he was to Jack, he wasn't an idiot who thought he would be the soul mate of the immortal Harkness. He wasn't some sniveling girl that was going to fawn after a man and go crying in a corner when he felt a little under the weather; he was a torchwood employee for god's sake. And it was time he started acting like one. He gritted his teeth through the blood and pushed a palm to the furry floor, his hand slipping on something sticky as he did so and he forced himself to think of it logically. He reached out his fingers and felt something slick, smooth and hard, he followed it despite the feeling of nausea coming over him, he was almost glad he was blind. He pushed away the fact that being blind could be a permanent ailment and even further disrupt the flow of the team as well as the flow of his and Jacks….thing. Couldn't exactly call it a relationship, he mused before shaking his head and focusing on the task. Whatever it was he had been feeling was curved and ended in a slightly round point, he moved back down tracing previous fingerprints only to meet the floor so he pushed his fingers against the fur and pulled the object further up to reach around it only to feel the clearly evident spine. He pulled away as though burned and recoiled into himself, deciding that being an investigative torchwood consultant could wait until after a quick nap. Almost instantly, he gave into the unconsciousness tugging at the back of his mind.
Forty - Two hours missing….
I missed Ianto so I had to write this chapter about him. It's getting harder to write this as I'm really wanting Ianto and Jack back together but it just doesn't seem right.
This chapter was boring, and I'm sorry. It had no action, nothing - just Ianto thinking. And I'm sorry.
If you feel I could change something to make it better please tell me and I'll try my best. I don't mind you pointing stuff out, really I don't. Be it grammer mistakes, characters mistakes, plot loops that seem out there, I don't mind AT ALL.
Also, this story IS rated "M" and in later chapters will live up to that rating for more than just curse words and violence. Just a warning ^/^
Random Quote: "well, I have a Banana and in a pinch you could build some shelves."
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