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(Sorry this took so long! This chapter talks about intimacy, just warning you.)
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Chapter 7; Caring—Part 2
Iruka took Naruto out for ramen.
It wasn't a rare occurrence, at least once a week they met, talked and ate together. But this time was different. This time, Naruto did very little but stare at Iruka with a rather despondent look on his face, and Iruka did very little other than stare into his bowl and scratch nervously at the bridge of his nose.
"At least tell me who's Uke…" Naruto said in a helpless voice. "Because if he's one of THOSE Semes, I'll have to tear it off!" He thumped his fist on the table, his bowl rattling.
Iruka could have groaned and hidden amid the twists and curls of his noodles like a kernel of corn at that moment.
"Uke and Seme? Naruto where the hell have you gotten your information!" He rubbed his face, trying to press the vibrant color from it.
Naruto seemed to flinch, his skin going positively green, then bright red; "You try being on a team with Sakura-chan for seven years and not know something about yaoi."
Iruka sighed; "Naruto… This isn't a teen girl's story book… This is two men in a serious and complicated relationship."
"Just tell me… Does he force you? Does it hurt when he—"
"Damnit, will you stop that!" He looked up his eyes wide and pulsing; "It isn't like that!"
Naruto spluttered, not convinced.
"Look… He and I care for one another very deeply… We love each other… There is no Seme. There is no Uke. It's just the two of us in a loving and caring relationship."
"Oh… So you don't have sex?"
It was Iruka's turn to splutter. He lowered his voice and tried to hide the redness in his face; "Yes, Naruto, we have sex…"
Naruto was silent for a few seconds. Then he began to fidget, his face screwing up into an expression that reminded Iruka of a time when he'd still had the blonde in his class, years ago, and the boy had developed a rather bad case of diarrhea right in the middle of a lecture.
He felt one of his eyebrows lift in response. "What is it?"
His face gone pink, Naruto shook his head; "I just don't understand how you can sit down or walk straight after… Doesn't it hurt?"
Deflating, Iruka pushed his noodles back, his appetite vanishing. "Okay… I want you to think about everything you learned from Sakura-chan's yaoi collection."
The blonde nodded.
"Now, I want you to put it in a box in your head, tape the box up really tight. Put it into another box, tape that one up too, gift wrap it. Put on a nice little bow… And punt it right out your ear. Understand?"
Naruto blinked at him cluelessly.
"A real relationship. A REAL homosexual relationship, very rarely ever mirrors a yaoi manga… Alright? Not only would one become incontinent and horrifically sore from the constant abuse, but it's likely you could tear or rupture your partner's bowels, and believe me… That isn't something I would wish on anybody!"
"So you don't really let him put his… His thing in you?"
Iruka blushed. "His 'Thing', Naruto? Honestly? His 'Thing'?"
He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.
Iruka sighed and rubbed his brow; "I don't want you to go spouting off about it like Sai-kun does… But, at least use the proper term… Honestly, 'THING'?" He chuckled and shook his head.
"Sorry."
"Don't be sorry… Just— God… Uh." He looked around, drumming up the courage to continue speaking; "Okay…" He looked the blonde square in the eye, trying not to wince as he spoke; "Yes, we've had penetrative sex before… But it's not a common occurrence. Anal penetration really isn't all that comfortable, and outside of manga, it really isn't that common either. It's a very messy process that takes lots of preparation—"
"You mean stretching? He does prepare you first, right?"
"Naruto."
"Yes?"
"Shut up."
"Sorry, sensei…"
With a deep breath, he continued. Voice low and quiet, hoping he wasn't overheard by anyone else in the stall.
"I'll admit it, ok… Yes! When it's done right, when it's done GENTLY, it feels good. But, I'm not really on the receiving end that often WHEN we do that."
And Naruto's mouth dropped open, his eyes gone as large as his bowl.
"You… Iruka-sensei… You've… To Kakashi-sensei!"
"Yes."
"He lets you do that!"
Iruka scoffed indignantly; "More like insists actually…"
Had a breeze come through the door Naruto surely would have been carried away by it.
After a few moments he shook his head to clear it and leaned far over the table almost getting into Iruka's face. "But he's so tough!"
"And I'm not?" He glowered, baring his teeth.
"It's not that… Kakashi-sensei is just taller, and older, a-and not as emotional as you… I just assumed he was the one… You know."
"That has nothing to do with our preferences! It's a joint venture, Naruto. No one person is 'In Charge'. Yes, we sometimes take turns or play games… But, it's really not like that all the time. Sex is about working together, about partnership and expressing your love for one another. It shouldn't be a power struggle… That just takes all the fun out of it."
"Okay, so if you don't do THAT all the time… How DO you do it?" He looked suddenly eager.
Iruka hesitated, shifted in his seat and leaned closer to Naruto; "May I ask you a personal question?"
"Of course."
"Have you had sex?"
After a moment, he shook his head and looked away at the floor. "I've never even had a girlfriend, Iruka-sensei…" He motioned to his stomach; "It's not like they line up, you know?"
Iruka nodded sympathetically. "Okay… First off, about your question…" He took a drink of his tea, cringing because it had gone cold; "It's really none of your damned business… But, because I care about you, and should you find someone you'd ever want to try it with, I'd rather you be prepared… And yes, that includes stretching." He chuckled at the blush working its way up Naruto's neck. "It is possible to be intimate in a satisfying and fulfilling way without penetration… Touch. Kiss, rub, for god's sake… How else are you going to find out what feels good. You don't jump head first into battle without at least a semblance of a plan, you train first. You practice!"
Naruto had gone bright red under his tan.
"What is it?"
"If I didn't know any better, sensei… I'd swear you just told me t-to m-masturbate."
"Well, there's nothing wrong with that… But, Naruto, really. You're almost eighteen, you've done nothing but spend your life working and training…" He finished his cold tea and folded his hands on the table. "You need to get out and have some fun once and a while."
The blonde looked up anxiously, his face scrunched up unpleasantly.
"I'm not telling you to go out and screw the first girl or boy you see… But, you really need to gain some experience in this department…" He went quiet for a few moments, thinking, then cocked his head. "Naruto, if I set you up with someone, would you like to go on a double date with Kakashi and me?"
The blonde was suddenly very pale, staring upward as if expecting some kind of harsh punishment or other unsavory thing to happen.
"G-go on a double date with my teachers?"
Iruka smiled crookedly; "Now, I know for a fact you passed the chuunin exam this past year. I'm not your teacher anymore. We're equals."
He looked uncomfortable with the idea, but nodded, his voice sounding surprisingly reluctant; "Okay…"
"Alright… Would you prefer a girl or a boy?"
"I-uh…" He fidgeted, "I just like people, Iruka-sensei… It doesn't really matter."
"Alright, that makes it much easier…" He sighed and lightly kicked the blonde under the table. "Hey… You're acting like I've just sent you on a suicide mission! It's just a date. It's not something to write your eulogy over."
"Okay…"
He still didn't look any better.
"Are you OK with the idea of me being with Kakashi, now? Or do you have more questions."
He nodded slowly, scratching nervously at the back of his neck; "I-I guess I'm OK with it… It'll just take some getting used to, I guess… Does Sakura-chan know?"
"I don't think so… Not yet." Iruka rubbed his face and leaned far back in his chair, his spine popping loudly as he stretched. "I'm going to need a long while to think before I try to talk to her…"
"Oh… Well… When you do talk to her, don't tell her right away that you've topped him… You might break her brain."
Iruka chuckled; "Alright, I'll keep that in mind."
They were silent for a moment, Naruto plunging his index finger into the middle of his cold ramen and stirring, using some little jutsu or another that he'd picked up from God only knew where, to reheat it. Slurping it down quickly once it was hot enough. He was halfway done, munching happily on a piece of pork, when he seemed to twitch and he glanced up eagerly.
"Okay, so Yaoi isn't entirely true, that's alright… But, what does it look like?"
Iruka felt his stomach lurch; "Uh… W-what does what look like?"
Naruto pounded the table again; "His face! What does his face look like! Don't deny it! I know you've seen it!"
"He's very handsome."
Naruto stared at him, a noodle hanging from the corner of his mouth.
Iruka ordered more tea.
"That's it? Come ON, Iruka-sensei! You've got to give me a better description than that!"
"Why? It's true. That's exactly what he looks like."
Naruto made a disbelieving noise and started shoveling noodles into his mouth again, mumbling; "I bet you're lying… I bet he's really ugly and you're just saying that to mess with me."
"I thought he made you a deal when you passed the chuunin exam— That if you could find where he hid those little bells of his, he'd show you."
He scoffed again; "He probably buried them, the bastard… Or keeps them in his mouth— He doesn't keep them in his mouth, does he?"
"Nope, sorry."
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