Buffy/Pirates of the Caribbean

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#15 Buffy/Jack – This time they're both stumped – 398 words

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"Forget it, I'm not doing it," Buffy stated decisively, shaking her head for good measure. Jack, standing beside her, backed away a step and waved his hand in her face, mouth opening and closing.

"You… you… it's your duty!" He zeroed in on her suddenly in typical Jack fashion, getting way too close for comfort, finger almost up her nose. "Your sacred, holy, absolutely… absolute… duty." Then he backed away again quickly, afraid she was going to come after him. It wouldn't be the first time.

"That is not part of my duty," she snapped, ignoring his fumbling and stumbling with the practice of too many years spent in too small quarters with the man. Somehow his crazy got a lot less impressive after a few years. "Why don't you do it? You're the one who got us into this mess in the first place."

The finger was back in her face as the pirate floundered for words. Since he was carefully keeping track of it out of the corner of his eye, he didn't manage much more than a helpless, "Nuh-uh!"

Buffy huffed, looked down at the object of their little crisis and returned the favor by getting up in Jack's face for a change. He received the change in pace with a slow blink and backed away a few steps. Right up until he realized he was getting within range of it. Then he almost jumped the slayer to put distance between himself and the thing. God, the smell alone…

"Jack Sparrow-," Buffy started, not impressed with the fearless pirate trying to hide behind her, dramatically pinching his nose closed.

"Ahh, Captain, love, Captain Jack Sparrow." She always, always, always forgot the Captain.

Buffy made a grab for the finger as soon as it reappeared and missed as he pulled it back lightning quick, cradling it against his chest. "Jack Sparrow," – she did that on purpose, she did- "You are the one who told Will and Liz that you would gladly babysit their spawn for them. I had nothing to do with it whatsoever and the fact that I'm a woman does not make me an expert in all things baby. So you are going to pull on your big boy panties and you are going to change little Will's diapers. Now!"

She crossed her arms and glared.

Jack gulped. Junior cooed.

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