"Miss Sciuto." A man in a white Navy dress uniform, sitting behind a table in a military courtroom said, "When you tested Lieutenant Howard's blood, did it test positive for any illegal substances?"

"Yes, it was positive for..." Abby began, when a loud snore filled the room, making everyone look towards the gallery.

"Is that man asleep?" The judge inquired.

"He's with me, he's my escort." Abby spoke up, drawing the judge's attention, "DiNozzo!"

Tony jumped up from the bench, his sunglasses almost falling off, "I'm up, baby, what do you need?" He slowly started to look around room, seeing that all eyes were on him. His eyes moved to the judge, who was glaring at him, "Uhhhh, sorry, your honor."

"His wife is pregnant and is due soon." Abby explained, trying to help Tony.

The judge's stance shifted, understanding Tony's plight, "Try to stay awake and please take off your sunglasses while you're in my courtroom."

Tony nodded as he lifted his hand to his mouth, yawning. He eased himself back down onto the bench, taking off his sunglasses.

"You may continue with your testimony, Miss Sciuto." The judge stated.

"Are you okay, Tony?" Abby asked, looking quite concerned as they walked over to their car.

"Yeah, I'm good, just..." Tony couldn't find the right word.

"Shouldn't you be like this after the baby gets here, not before?"

"Heh." Tony nervously uttered, "Tell me about it."

"Then why are you, so...worn out? All from midnight food cravings?"

"Oh, it's cravings alright." Tony began, he unlocked the door and started to get into the car, "But it's not just food she's cravin'."

"Huh?" A smile quickly washed over Abby's face, "Ohhhhhh, I see, the big ol' S-E-X, huh?"

"Did you really need to spell it out, Abs?"

Abby chuckled, "I guess I did. Wait, you, the Sex Machine can't handle a woman who is eight months pregnant? That doesn't sound like the Tony DiNozzo I know and love!"

"Like I said, I'm good, I'm not complaining." Tony riterated, he slid the key into the ignition, turning on the car and slowly drove off.

"I don't have a cat, so me asking this won't kill anything, so...uhh, about how many times are we talking about here, typically, in a day?" Abby asked.

"Huh?"

"You know: sex, intercourse, bumpin' uglies, doin' the nasty, the ol' in-out, the..."

"I get it, I get it." Tony shook his head and couldn't help but smile and answered her, "We had sex seven, maybe eight times yesterday."

Abby was shocked at the number, but was a little confused, "Maybe eight?"

"Well, I passed out and I don't know if she stopped or not."

Abby laughed, "That's it, I SO need to get pregnant, so all I can do all day is sleep, eat and..."

"Don't forget peeing all the time, the puking, your back killing you, your feet are swollen, you're horny one minute, hating the penis the next, then there's the really bad stuff..."

"Awww, poor, Ziva." Abby frowned.

"You don't want to be pregnant anymore, do you?"

"I dunno, tell me the really bad stuff, I can take it."

"One word: hemorrhoids."

"I was wrong, I can't...you win."

"Tony?" Ziva called out, "We are back from shopping." She waddled down the hallway, "I got you an elephant ear, well, I ate half of it." She took another bite of the sugar-topped fried dough, "A little more than that now." She admitted, through her many chews, "Tony?" She called out again, but still there was no answer.

She turned into the nursery, seeing Tony sleeping on the floor in front of their brand new crib. She softly laughed, seeing that he was using a pack of diapers as a pillow. She smiled as she made her way over, sliding her hand along the top of the railing, feeling the smoothness of the wood on her palm. She moved over him and carefully dropped down, straddling his waist, "Wake up." She whispered.

His eyes started to flicker, trying hard to open, but his eyelids were just too heavy. She teased his lips with the remainder of the pastry, then kissed him, licking and sucking the sugar from his lips.

She tossed the treat aside and began kissing him passionately, but stopped suddenly and his eyes popped open, he was fully awake, "W-why am I wet?"

Author Note #1 - Yawwwwwwnnnnnnnnn!