Hey everyone! How you all been?

Anyways I have updated another great chapter, even if I say so myself! He he :D

Disclamer: I do not own the world of Twilight or the wonderful characters that are in it. Unfortunately Stephenie Meyer does. But all the Twihards wish, right?

Oh mother, we're stronger
From all of the tears you have shed
Oh mother, don't look back
Cause he'll never hurt us again

So mother, I thank you
For all that you've done and still do
You got me, I got you
Together we always pull through
We always pull through
We always pull through
Oh mother, oh mother, oh mother

Oh Mother by Christina Aguilera

OH MOTHER

18 November 2003

"Oh, my girl..."Mrs Cullen jumped from her seat and ran towards me. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and hugged me tightly. She smelled of lavenders. Just like Edward. I always teased hin about it, but that smell always reminded me of home, of spring. I breathed it in, deeply, I wanted to feel Edward inside me. His sweet smell, filling me up. Mrs Cullen stepped back to see my face. She still had the long caramel hair, and fair deep blue eyes, that I knew since I was younger. She never changed and I wouldn't want her to. She was a pasionate woman. She loved her husband like the first and cared about her adopted children as they were like her own. I couldn't make myself imgagine, how the other children would be, when they heard. At least they weren't here to see their parents, beause it would make everything worse. They went on a holiday trip to Paris, with the school. Edward didn't go because I didn't. But now I wish he did. Because if he did go, then he would at least be alive. Esme Cullens eyes stared into mine, and I saw how old she looked. She was 24 years old, but now, she looked 50. Her eyes were red, and there was purple sacks under her eyes. She looked vulnerable. I cupped her face with my hands and forced to smile.

"Are you okay,Mrs Cullen?" I asked but before I finished speaking, she broke down into hard sobs. Tears ran down her soft cheeks like streams of water, and her knees buckled, making her lose her balance. I held her hand and slowly helped her walk to her seat.

"Oh, my girl...I'm so glad you came. I'm so glad..." Mrs Cullen kept saying. I tried so hard not to cry with her, as she spoke through tears. I felt useless that I couldn't help her.

"I'm here,Mrs Cullen. Everything will be okay."I assured her but she shook her head, from side to side. It was like she couldn't hear me, and she was in her own world. She suddenly stopped in her tracks, and turned to face me. Her eyes widened, and she frowned. She looked like she just realised something that she had missed for so long.

"Edward...He's...hes gone!" she gasped and placed her hands over her heart. She looked hurt, like a bird whose wings were broken. She didn't cry but she froze in place, like a living statue. She stared at something over my shoulder, but I took hold of her cold hands into mine to get her attention. I guess this worked because her frozen eyes calmed down and slowly turned to face me.

"Calm down, Mrs Cullen. Just take a seat, okay?" she slowly nodded and I led her to sit down. The room was a dull room. The walls were grey, grey carpets, white coffee table and a big black sofa. As I had first enterd the room, I felt trapped and anxious. This room made me feel ill, even though I was healthy as a horse. I felt like I was in a cage, without any light or direction. I placed the thoughts aside, and sat next to Mrs Cullen. The couch was cold as ice, and hard against my back. Mrs Cullen turned to face me, and placed her pale white hands on top of mine. She stared into my eyes so intensly, so deeply, I thought I was hypnotised. No matter how serious she looked, I could still see she was hopeless. She had lost her faith.

"My dear child, you brought him back once, can you please bring him back again?" she asked in her soft voice. She squeezed my hands, and I felt my heart being squeezed. her plea for help was like achild asking for ice cream on a cold day. Her eyes shone with tears, but it didn't follow through. I wish I could help her, but I can't. I wish with all my heart, that I could make a miracle.

"Mrs Cullen, you have to understand that I am not a God. I cannot bring the dead back. I wish I could, even if my life depended on it. But I can't."I asked forher to understand but, she just sighed and looked down at our hands.

"My little boy. Why the little Eddie, that never spoke, never laughed, never smiled? Why did I let him go, when I just found him?"

"Edward, needs your love and support, Mrs Cullen. Keep your head and shoulders high. Be brave. That's what you taught him." I smiled, and Mrs Cullen snapped her head up, She looked confused, but happy.

"I...w-what?" she shuttered.

"Edward told me that when everything was hard, difficult for you, you always kept smiling, you kept tears away from his eyes. You were always the mother he invisioned, wanted. Strong and loving." I spoke slowly for her to digest my every word. Emphasize every point, because I tried to raise her hopes. But I failed again, because she once again, realised the horible truth.

"My dear child, its too late hes gone. I'll never hear him talk to me, never hear him play those beuatiful songs in his piano, never hear him laugh." she threw her arms around my arms and hugged me once again. I liked the feeling of being hugged like how a mother would hug his child. I didn't have any motherly affection for years. And I didn't want to let go off this moment. I hold her tight and slowly rubbed her back, and tried to calm her down. Her shallow breaths became slow and deep.

"I know,its hard. But we have to cope with it. Hes looking down at us, and hes unhappy. Sad. Please? For him and his memory, don't lose yourself. Your husband needs your support. I need you." she kissed the top of my head, and looked at me with those deep blue eyes. It was just like staring at the ocean. But Mrs Cullens, eyes shone with tears, and she even smiled. It didn't reach up to her eyes, but it was a development. I knew she was trying so hard, and I respected her. I was even grateful for her, to be able to stay strong. Edward may not be her only adoptive child, but it was the dearest on to her. His past always amazed her, always made her come close to tears. But what is amazing is that, she learned from Edward, without even realising it. She learned patience, with him. She learned to listen. She learned to let other peple help her, instead of wanting to always do it herself. She kissed my forehead and placed her chin on top of my head.

"You were all he ever talked about. You were the world to him. Everything. But more than that you were his happyness, his strength, his safety net;his sanity. I was jealous of your relationship. There seemed to ve always more than we saw, it was like you always knew how the other one felt or thought without speaking. It made me angry before, that you could be close to him more than I could ever be. But when I saw him smile for the first time, my anger vanished, and graditude filed me up. I thank you with all my heart. And I can never know how to pay you. But...Its difficult to say this but...I've never enved someone my life before Bella, until now. I admire and envy your strength, your relationship with him, your heart. I would give everything I have, just to hear some of the things he told you."

I didn't now how to answer. I knew that she loved Edward more than anything, but I never knew it was to this extent. I didn't know it was this deep. I felt stupid, and blind. Of course she did. It was her son, and the most precious to her. Edward was always a mystery, and now it would stay like that forever. I remember every little detail he told me, every single new things I learnt about him in the past, were fresh in my memory. No matter how much I wanted to help Mrs Cullen, I couldn't betray Edwards secrets. His words for my own ears to hear, no on else. But Mrs Cullens words still clung to my mind. She envied me? That was the most obsured thing i've ever heard! Edwards life wasn't interesting or amazing. It was the opposite. It was proof of pure evil. It was what he went through to become the person he was, that made everyones heart acje in pain, or come to tears when they saw his unsmiling, unhappy face. He was a boy with a gruesome past. But maybe? He could have had a bright future...

"My guardian?"she asked suddenly her face looked puzzled. It was if, she was thinking and something important occurred. But then she relaxed. "Oh yes...He was your guardian and you were his angel."

"Mrs Cullen? I've lost him, too. I miss him, already. And he drilled a big hole in my heart, that is just like the Black hole. He dragged me out of darknes, and I'm forever grateful, but now, I'm drageed back down again." she kissed my hair again, and hugged me tighter.

"You both saved each other."

"Stop this,Mrs Cullen. I'm sure Edward will always be standing next to you, smiling. Admiring your strength to hold on to the world, and continue living, even though you are hurting inside. Stop this, Mrs Cullen. For Alice, Jasper, Emmett,Rosalie. They lost their brother, and dont make it worse for them. Smile, for them now. Help them get through this tough time. Together as a family."

"What do we do?"

"You keep strong. He might have gone, but you have other children to look after, and they are young. Always remember that! They already lost their real parents, and don't make them lose another."I spoke softly but emphasized every word, letter, verb. I tried to keep calm but Mrs Cullens tears made my heart beat in pain. My eyes filled with tears but I took deep breaths. The tears froze in my eyes and didn't follow the journey down my cheeks. I was glad. Glad to be here comforting Mrs Cullen, and not Mrs Cullen comforting me. Because I knew that if she did I would say what I thought, felt, and this would make every single thing worse. Trust me. I pulled my head back a bit, and cupped her round face, in both my hands. She looked so fragile, and weak, I thought that she would just turn into dust. Like a hundred years old, vase. I kissed her cheeks and continued to speak, but this time, I kept my voice a whisper. "Pray. To God himself, and Edwards soul. Help him sleep peacefuly. You can't bring him back but hope that he wil be remembered forever."

"Oh, Bella. I'm so sorry." she placed her soft arms around me, and held me in her warm embrace:as she spoke. It wasn't like she was holding me, it was more like I was the only thing that was keeping her standed. I felt tears fill my eyes again, but I didn't let them follow into a river. But this one time, a tear ran down my cheek. How weird? I didn't want to cr, but this one tear, seemed important enough to break through my bariers. I don't know why but I think her voice reminded me how Edward would keep his smoothing and velvet voice to calm me and remind me that I wasn't alone.I shouldn't be afraid to let people in. I would smell his scent through my nostrills, and all of a sudden I would feel as if I was in the middle of Spring. His lavender filled smell, would make me inhale deeper and hug him tighter. This was not like Edwards cuddle, nor was it anywhere close, but her tone was just like his. I smelled Mrs Cullen, but she didn't smell the same now. She smelled of hospitals. The smell of medicine, antiseptics, anesthetics. I was glad she didn't smell like him, but on the other hand I wouldn''t be able to smell him anymore. A rush of loss and guilt ran over my body, as fast as a train on tracks. Edwards death felt like a huge stone sitting on my heart. I felt weak and lost, suddenly, and I hated this feeling. I've hadn't felt like this in a long time, but when I did, it didn't seem unfamiliar. I sighed.

"So I'm I, Mrs Cullen. So I'm I."

So how was it? I know we all hate seeing Esme sad..:(

But wait for more really interesting chapters. With alot more emotion, crying, a stalker and much more.

Edward: (to the reader)You should read and review. It makes Reyy happy. And it makes me happy.

Me: You are the sweetest thing! :)

Edward: Yeah, I know.

You all want to make Edward happy right? So what are you waiting for? REVIEW!