Chapter One: In So Many Words
Kanda Yuu is taken aback by the sudden knock on the door that connects his apartment to the beansprout's apartment (most unfortunate), his eyes narrow and he scowls at nothing in particular. There's a knock on the same door once again, it is deemed to be annoying immediately by Kanda, but nevertheless, he opts to open the door. It could well be an emergency, the bean could have started a fire in his kitchen, he could have set himself on fire, he could have been chocking on something (and didn't have anyone to help him cough it out through the Heimlich Maneuver thingy), or you know he could have the need to perform to the call of nature but his toilet is clogged. OR SOMETHING. He should have known better though, he shouldn't have expected any emergency, because when he opened the door, there the bean stood, no sense of urgency in his face, completely unscathed, not burning, not sweating while looking like he needed to expel something, looking strangely determined about something, but all in all looking like he had nothing urgent nor interesting to say. In other words, he looked ready to waste Kanda's time. Which Kanda of course found, to be very, VERY irksome
"What do you want bean?" Japanese eyes narrowed, and half-scowled at the young man in from of him
Allen Walker squints, and half-scowls at Kanda as well, but then he clenches his fists as if to resist saying something, hesitating, he presses his lips together till they formed a thin line. Kanda raises an eyebrow at him, but his face remains aloof. "Thanks..." the bean finally blurts out, almost through clenched teeth "...for the gift I mean..."
After considering it a moment, Kanda snorts "I didn't have much of a choice really did I?"
This time Allen's scowl is genuine "Thank you anyway, good day" and the door is banged shut
After staring at the door for a few seconds, Kanda shrugs and turns around to plop himself onto his sofa. It was TRUE dammit. He did not have much of a choice at all. He didn't want to start on the wrong foot with everyone in the apartment building, so he just HAD to buy the bean a gift, a gift with worth. Though he was sure the bean would not have opened it. The bean disliked him after all (which in a strange way pleased the Japanese). No surprise really, seeing as he was mean to him.
Honestly he had no idea what came over him, he doesn't usually engage in any sort of spiteful banter with anyone outside of his family. With the bean however, it seemed like the most natural thing to do in the world. It was as if some higher infinite power made it so. Personally Kanda thinks destiny and what not was bullshit, but this mutual enmity was the bean was very unlike him that he can't help but think that someone was planning something behind his back. But that was just one theory. He had another one, one he actually wants to think is true. That is, he thinks that he subconsciously sensed something missing in the beansprout's life based on his demeanor, and then subconsciously filled it with himself. That is to say, Allen had no one in his life who hated his guts, so Kanda decided that he would gladly hate the guy's guts for him. It was a favor really, it his opinion the bean should thank him for filling the formerly empty spot in his life. You can never claim to have lived a good life after all if you haven't experienced at least one case of mutual enmity between you and another. It's one of the many unwritten rules of the universe. The Kanda Universe.
Of course it would be unethical for Kanda to just assume the world will follow his universe's ideals, which is why he's "introverted". By only sticking to people who go by his expectations, he prevents ever getting really disappointed. When you already expect exactly when someone will succeed or fail, you will not feel at all let down when either happens. However, Allen Walker is a potential anomaly to the system to Kanda's Universe. The reason being he has become an extra bickering partner, and Kanda already had his brothers for this. He doesn't want him to get into his world to ruin the balance. (Though at this point, it would be evident that it is inevitable, they are already part of each other's lives albeit reluctantly)
Kanda Yuu despite what we may now think happens to be a pragmatic person, which is probably why he, despite not wanting this disturbance in his life, is letting his strange mutual enmity with Allen Walker the beansprout advance in the way other universes would put it (or rather, as he would put it, it doesn't matter). If you are coming to understand this information, you deserve much applause. Kanda Yuu and his so called introverted ways have been deemed unfathomable long ago by all his former psychiatrists and psychologists. Considered a hopeless case by many, it requires great intellect to fully understand this person, although maybe intellect wouldn't be enough either, and the only way to really understand Kanda Yuu was to literally get in his head.
Getting into Kanda's head however will be very difficult, especially since he has habits that are difficult to interpret. He almost always insists on eating soba for his meals and cannot end his day without having drunk three Grande Vanilla Frappes from Starbucks. He locks his doors three times before he leaves his apartment and cannot fall asleep unless he's counted his clothes. It doesn't make any sense why he insists on these things but he does. He's also very protective of his katana (fondly named "Mugen") which he got from his biological parents. Although that last part might actually be understandable it seems everything else about the man isn't, which is why he tends to scare people.
"You're kidding me right?" Kanda's eyebrows creased
"I'm sorry sir but the vanilla frappe..." the cashier pauses, looking stricken "...is unavailable..."
Looking absolutely irked, Kanda Yuu crumples a tissue and scowls at the menu overhead. He then grunts in annoyance, and exits, leaving the poor cashier shaken.
Of course by now, we can conclude that the words "This is shit" are playing in Kanda's mind like a mantra. This is of course quite pathetic and should be vehemently frowned upon, but if you were to walk past him while he is in this state, and you end up feeling quite intimidated; there is absolutely no need to worry, you are a normal person.
He plops himself down onto his comfortable sofa, basking the in the smell of home. By now, Kanda Yuu is thinking that his day couldn't get any worse.
BANG. SMASH. THUD.
Unfortunately it just did. The door separating his room from Allen Walker's apartment has just been taking down by what seems to be a winged golden ball that has sharp teeth.
"What the fucking hell" is all Kanda can muster to say, utterly stunned
"TIMCAMPY!" and it's the bean shouting, he runs to the scene, the rabbit right behind him
The rabbit (commonly known as Lavi the doorman) lets out a low whistle "Dang..."
"Shit... I'm so sorry" the bean doesn't look so sorry though, if Kanda didn't know any better, he'd say it's what the bean wanted all along, and he didn't know any better, so that IS what he says
"You told this little ball of shit to do that didn't you?" through gritted teeth, Kanda says
"Oh, so that's what you take me for?" the bean looks genuinely offended
Kanda, being the person he is says, "Yes". Lavi the rabbit, err, doorman, suppresses a laugh.
Allen Walker, being the person HE is, rolls his eyes "WHATEVER, I'M SORRY, GOOD DAY." And he walks away, end of conversation.
Kanda automatically thinks "HOW THE FUCK IS IT A GOOD DAY?"
...
A few minutes before Timcampy took down the door Allen so dreads to even touch, Lavi the doorman came into his apartment, pestering him to open Kanda's gift.
"Dammit Lavi, I don't want to open it!" Says the young Mister Walker, and he leaves out the part about him not trusting Kanda
"Sure you don't, now OPEN IT." Lavi grins
Allen rolls his eyes "What do I have to do to make you understand that I don't wanna know what's in the present?"
"Oh come on Allen, HE GOT YOU A PRESENT. I think it'd be interesting to get a glimpse of what his taste is like..." and the 'handsome' doorman pokes his arm incessantly
"It's not interesting in the least..." the Englishman purses his lips
"SURE it isn't" Lavi says, and before Allen can even begin to roll his eyes
BANG. SMASH. THUD.
"Holy—"
...
Original a/n:I'm sorry if I'm so weird. In effect Kanda has become weird. I'm sorry, my alternate universe it turning out to be insane. And I haven't re-read this so it may still have errors. Maybe I should finish my other Yuullen fic before updating this again... There's only 2 more chapters to go anyway... oh well.
A/N after edit: I changed the long ramble her about Kanda's insights and general characterization here, but that's basically all that's different.