CHAPTER FIFTEEN: Allen Walker Pool Parties ROCK

This has been said before, but it is something that really should be said again and again because no matter how much one says it, it is never enough since whatever words one has used to blurt out this particular thought or idea, it will, decidedly, never, ever, be enough to express what should have been expressed.

This is obviously one of those things which are beyond words. There is no statement that can accurately describe it, for it, is one such it that is limited by all adjectives. Even the superlative degree is not enough for it. People who are asked to describe it cry when their efforts fail (as was inevitable). They learn the hard way that this is something one cannot make others understand by simple using a mere collection of phonemes. Language is but a mere system of arbitrary symbols. It cannot possibly hope to describe a concept beyond us human beings but below the heavenly and infinite. A study conducted by the beloved doorman (whose first name is Lavi, and whose last name is…err… something), reveals that this is indeed an idea which lies on the line separating the earth dwellers from divinity. Lavi however, believes that even if we really cannot hope to find the words to do this concept any justice, we should at least try. Lyrical lines are often appreciated best, is what he usually adds.

This, Lavi thinks, is what we all should say, "Sweet is the taste of victory on man's lips, but oh! Sweeter still is the taste of Allen-Walker-Pool-Party booze on mine!" you almost believe that he is some sort of incarnation of Hamlet, and that he is musing on something just as direly inevitable and important as death. However, squinting will bring one to see what one should have seen, which is of course, a drunken doorman musing on what is probably the best booze in the world. An even more drunk Lenalee Lee comments on how booze cannot be described with the word "sweet" really, but the doorman pays the statement no heed as he proceeds to deliver what might just be the most brilliantly put together soliloquy on the topic of alcohol.

Komui Lee then proceeds to making his bikini wearing sister put on a bath robe, and escorts her away from Lavi whom he describes as a "madman" thereafter muttering what sounded like other insults under his breath. It must be noted that if Komui Lee had been as drunk as his sister or the doorman, he would have joined Lavi in his poetic tirade, creating what would have been a marvelous two-man play. Unfortunately for us all this is not something that has come to pass, and there is now but one man, standing proudly above the crowd in nothing but his beach shorts, professing his love for the glass of vodka he held in his hand.

Allen Walker, joins the party just in time for the kiss scene, and promptly grimaces upon seeing Lavi's drunken love affair with his drink. The Englishman assures you however, that this does not remind him of his recent drunken exploit, which he had just relived early (?) that night (while completely sober even). He decides to look for Lenalee, in hopes to find her sober. He spots her bathrobe clad figure standing not too far away. Allen opts to get a little closer, but a closer inspection of Lenalee Lee and her surroundings only produced the conclusion that she was definitely more wasted than the rambling doorman. This was obvious because of two reasons, mainly, (1) Komui was in hysterics about the destruction of his dear little sister's innocence (and liver), and (2) Lenalee does not look exasperated in the least (much unlike how she usually is when her brother is like this)… Although maybe the unstable footing and the periodical hiccupping also gave the Chinese girl away, Allen quickly gets annoyed by the fact that these were not the reasons he had mentioned in his little mental analysis.

Suddenly there is a tight grip on Englishman's shoulder, and he jumps slightly in his surprise. He turns around to see Lavi's devious grin. "Why…" the doorman says "…I say, WHY are you late Allen, old chap?"

Allen eyes him curiously, thinking briefly about what he should reply, he settles on this: "Kanda felt stiff, so I gave him a massage". It is wonderful, Allen thinks, that alcohol removes Lavi's comprehension of innuendo.

"Such kindness!" Lavi throws his head back and brings the back of his hand to his forehead "And here I was, under the impression that you despise all good acts directed towards that astonishingly effeminate man" he makes an elaborate hand gesture "Ah, but it has become apparent that I have been under false pretences…"

The first thing Allen thinks of saying is "false pretences" is a redundant phrase, but he settle on blurting out: "Uhuh, yeah, uh, ok, Lavi, I just came up here so that you'd all know this party is not being thrown whilst lacking a celebrant."

"Is that so?" the doorman replies, but he looks very distracted. He looks at the drink in his hand mutters a soft "goodbye my love" and drinks everything in one gulp. Not even a second after he does so, he grabs a bottle of liquor from an unsuspecting passerby. He fills his class. "Allen, meet my new wife…" Lavi pauses to inspect the bottle momentarily "…Rose" he finished. The Englishman looks at the said "wife" to discover that it was a bottle of Tequila Rose. Thank goodness, he thought, that Lavi was now drinking something lighter (even if it wasjust caused by a peculiarly lucky turn of events).

"Hey Allen, me and Rose plan to go skinny dipping, and we plan to invite a few people along with us. We have decided to give you the honor of being the first man invited." Allen notes how there is nothing honorable about being invited to go skinny dipping.

"Lavi… I really don't think you should…" he inwardly laughs for a moment, finding it funny that he is trying to be the voice of reason "The alcohol is getting to you… You'll feel embarrassed about this tomorrow if you do this…"

"Swimming naked is nothing to be ashamed of, if it was done under the influence of alcohol" the doorman replies, with the most firm voice he could muster "And besides, you went skinny dipping with Kanda when you were drunk, and it seems like you both enjoyed the swim…" for a moment, Allen is shocked that Lavi can create such a statement, whilst being in such a state "…Are the waters of your room that good? I mean you obviously dove in naked again tonight, while sober even!" the doorman pauses "Hmm… or maybe it was the partner… Kanda must be excellent at freestyle, then". The Englishman merely hangs his mouth open in shock. Moments pass, with not a single word escaping either of their lips.

"Well if there are no more objections, Rose and I will be on our merry way… I wonder who might like to join us…" he stops to consider it, then shrugs "... Farewell then dear friend! Until the tide of the crowd brings us together again!" Allen hopes that if that does happen, Lavi would have something on.

……………………………..

"How was the party?" this is not exactly a normal thing to inquire about when you're making out, but Kanda was never exactly normal to begin with, so Allen puts up with the weirdly timed attempt at small talk. The snow-haired boy shrugs, wraps his arms around the Japanese's neck and says "Lavi showed off his birthday suit and declared himself husband of a bottle of Tequila rose, and if anyone else did anything interesting, Lavi's antics definitely overshadowed them all". Widened dark eyes stare at him, this the Englishman takes as a sign of Kanda's utter relief (?). The taller man was definitely thinking that his decision not to attend had been right.

"Oh come on Kanda, that's what Allen-Walker-Pool-Parties are all about" he had to force himself not to add "deal with it".

"Anything named after you bean, is bound to be horrible" says Kanda, matter-of-factly

"Uhuh…but you seem to like 'little Allen Walker' a lot, is HE so horrible then?" and his voice is an amazing mix of teasing and defiant

The Japanese frowns "That's different"

"Admit it Kanda…" triumph rings in Allen's tone "…Allen-Walker-Pool-Parties, ROCK". Much to the Englishman's surprise, a smirk appears on Kanda's face. "Wh-What?" he says, still startled.

"Well, I was just thinking about how this and that are different"

"This and that?"

"While that Allen-Walker-Pool-Party was definitely one of the worst, and most time wasting parties of all time, thisAllen-Walker-Pool-Party, rocks" the last word was said teasingly, but it sounded kinda, sorta, awkward, nevertheless, Allen was irked.

A great retort dawns upon him "You and Lavi are on the same wavelength" he grins when he sees dark eyes narrow.

"How the fucking hell is it possible that me and the rabbit are on the same wavelength?"

"Oh, well, you just happen to have the exact same taste on innuendos"

The Japanese rolls his eyes

…………………….

(Original A/N:HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MExD hahaha)

A/N placed at the beginning of this chapter in the Original version: I decided NOT to change the rating. I thought about it a lot and that was the decision I settled with, haha. As it turns out the one part which I was nervous about in the previous chapter, wasn't as blatantly put as I thought it was (this I concluded after rereading the last chapter a few times). Thank you to those who gave their opinions on this matter, I appreciate it very much :) Maybe I'll do an M rated fic next? Hahaha! We'll see… For now, all I have to present is this chapter. :) enjoy

A/N AFTER EDIT: SO I think it's pretty cool I put this up on my birthday. I dunno, haha. I wish I'd still have time once school starts again for me (which is pretty soon) but I think that updates will be like once a month. I'll work hard to make them good though.