Warning: This chapter will be a little depressing and I will be a little evil (again) Learn it because I am not going to change.
It was raining. He was not sure when the good weather had ended. Not that it really mattered. He did not care. Nothing mattered to him anymore. But still it was weird how it changed just from one day to another. It just showed how nothing stayed the same no matter how mush one wished for it.
Deidara locked the door behind him and sighed. Another day with work was over. Now he could go home, do his homework and maybe also eat a little.
The nausea told him otherwise. Deidara rubbed his eyes and started walking. Since his mother had ended at the hospital he had been working every night. Now he was alone to pay the bills for the house and from the hospital.
The fear of coming behind the others in school forced him to do his homework whenever he had the opportunity. Which meant he did have even less time to sleep and visit his mother.
One and half a month had passed and she had still not made any signs of waking up. Deidara knew that the longer she was like that the less was the chance that she did ever wake up again.
He followed the street down. His hands were sore after all the cleaning he had been doing but at least he was finished for tonight.
The cold air sends shivers down his spine and Deidara hugged himself. He did not look forward to come home to an empty house but at least he would not be out in the cold any longer.
The cars drove past him without sparring him a single glance. Deidara rubbed his arms trying to keep himself warm. He did not have his jacket with him. It had disappeared one day at school last week and he did not want to waste money on a new. He could not afford wasting money at such trivial things in the moment.
Half asleep and cold to the bone he arrived home with sore feet. Deidara opened the door. Silence greeted him and he sighed. It sounded much louder in the empty house than he liked it to. He did not feel like eating tonight which was lucky since he was not sure he had anything eatable in the house.
Walking to his room Deidara leaned heavily against the wall. He found it hard to keep his eyes open but would not be able to go to sleep just yet. There was still homework for tomorrow. Some of the teachers would have his head if he was not finished to the time.
The next day
Not a single one of them had made an attempt to talk with him since Sasori had heard about the plan. Wait, that was not true. Konan had tried, time after time, to talk to him. But Deidara had ignored her even if it broke his heart more than it already was. If that was possible.
He had made his choice. No one should ever get so close to him that their words could hurt him like that again.
Still he could not stop watching the group whenever he was in the same room as some of the members. If he could not be together with them then he could at least watch them from afar and dream about how things could have been.
He had changed. He knew it and he knew that other people had started noticing it. He had lost some weight since he barely ate by now. And he only talked in class when the teachers asked him a question.
More than a few times he had been hold back after class and the teachers had tried to figure out what was wrong with him. Every time he had shrugged his shoulders and left as soon as he got permission to. He knew they did not really care. No one did.
He wondered what would happen if he one day ended his life. How long would it take before someone noticed that he no longer met at school? Maybe a week. Then it would take them a few days until they would turn up at his door. By that time the corpse would have started rotting and he would probably have started smelling.
How to do it? He could think of many ways and most of them would leave as mess. Slit his wrists, a bullet through his head, jumping out in front of a car or build a bomb. Deidara shook his head. Should he end his life it should be a clean way. He would make sure that no one would be able to hindering doing as he wished for.
He starred down at his hands. For once he was not wearing his gloves. Since it was lunch break and it was raining most of the student body would be inside the school. He smiled not caring that he was soaked to the bone. Soon it would all be over. He would no longer be there to remind people of his freakiness.
A plan formed in his head. Deidara got up from where he had been sitting on the ground. The exact same spit as where he had been sitting with Akatsuki over a month ago.
After a last glance at the school building Deidara turned around and left the school ground. He did not turn around to look back a single time. There were nothing left for him there.
He knew his mother would never forgive him if she ever woke up. If it ever would happen. He had lost his hope for that. His mother had not reacted to any of the treatments the doctors had given her. He doubted that she would ever wake up again.
Luckily not many people was outside so no one could wonder why a student was wandering around while he was supposed to be at school. He did not know what he would do if someone stopped him. In the moment it did not matter.
He had already done all he needed to. He had said goodbye to his mother last time he had been visiting her. He would not leave any letter for people to find. He had no one else to say goodbye to. Konan had been his friend but hopefully she would eventually forgive him. After all she had other friends she could hang out with. He would soon be forgotten.
Deidara arrived at his destination after walking half an hour. An old bridge which nearly no one used a new one had been building a little up the road.
It was the perfect place. Only empty warehouses were around. Most of them were used of gangs at night but in daytime there was no one around. No one to interfere with what he was about to do.
He leaned over the handrail and starred down at the muddy-brown water. IT reminded him of his danna's eyes. Deidara smiled ignoring the pain in his chest. He knew this was what his danna wanted him to do. After this his danna would not be bothered with his existence any longer.
Deidara climbed over the handrail and took a deep breath. He was shivering. Both from the cold but also from fear. He wanted his miserable life to end. Hopefully it would not be too painful. He did not know. He had not tried dying before.
He hoped it would not be a child who found his body. It was the only negative thing about his plan. He could not chose who would find his body or if it would be found. Maybe the fish would eat his meat so no one would be able to recognise him. With all the weight he had lost lately it would not take long for the animals to finish this dinner.
He leaned forward. Still holding the handrail as if it his life depended on it. Which it actually did.
Still smiling he let go of the handrail and felt how he started falling forward. Deidara spread out his arms. Finally he would find out how the birds felt when they were flying. Not once did he notice the tears that mixed with the raindrops.
Will be continued.
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Strong hands grabbed his arms and yanked him backwards. Deidara yelped in pain when his back hit against the handrail. Deidara turned his head to see what or who had dared to stop him from going to death while he struggle to get free so that he could continue.
"Let go of me, un."
"I do not think so."
The voice send cold shivers down his spine. "You, un." He could nearly feel how the other one starred at him with lust in his eyes. "I told you. You are mine. Not death and any puppet boy can stop me from claiming what is mine. I am not letting go of you now when I finally have you."
Deidara went limp as he was lifted over to the safe side and hoped that the other boy would let go of him now where he was not protesting. Instead the hands forced him to lie down at the cold, wet asphalt. "And now you are mine."
Deidara did not say anything. It did not matter. He only regretted that he was not dead.
I actually considered ending the story when he jumped but since I do not feel like dying yet (I still don't own the rights to Naruto or have world domination) I will continue the story.
Can any of you guess who saved Deidara's life?
Next: Deidara is missing and certain people wants to find him. Also find out what happened to Deidara.
Until then.