A/N

So, I know a lot of this happened really fast and kind of awkwardly. It's just that this is the stuff I have to get out of the way before the actual plot to the story begins. I'm awful at writing chapters where nothing happens, so I just make everything happen really quickly. The next couple chapters will probably be like that, too, but the plot isn't really about them falling in love. It's about the repercussions.

And, I know River seems like she's really perfect. I tend to do that, make perfect characters. She'll have her imperfections later, now that it's been pointed out to me. And, she obviously does have her problems (I mean, her parents are terrified of her and never write to her), but this story is so much more about Draco's problems than hers. Now I'm just rambling.

Only one person pointed this out, but Draco smokes simply because I've seen pictures of Tom Felton (who plays Draco in the movies) smoking and it made me think that it fits his character. Just see it as a bad habit he picked up at school. It's not going to play any sort of key role, and probably will only be mentioned again in passing.

The reason Draco's so OOC is that this is what I like to think is going on inside him for all of the sixth and seventh books. He has a desperate need to fit in with Crabbe, Goyle, Blaise and the rest, so he keeps up the death eater thing, but he's also severely confused, damaged and misunderstood. I'm a little bit obsessed with Draco, so I wanted him to be viewed in a good light.

The prophecy sucked because I have no idea how to write like the prophecies are in the books. He told her for a reason (briefly explained that it's because the right person has to kill her, or he's going to be in a lot of trouble with Voldemort.)

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing except River and the plot.

Ch. 4 Coming to My Sense

This sudden shift of emotions quickly terrified and confused me. On my way to the hospital wing, I collapsed against the wall in peals of hysterical laughter. I wasn't in love with Draco Malfoy. There wasn't any bizarre elemental magic going on. That's insane. He was simply manipulating me because of the lame ass prophecy. I thought of the time between the kiss in the Room of Requirements and the kiss in the bathroom. We'd seen each other in lessons, of course. We'd even spoken once or twice. He'd been much more civil to me, but still far from kind. And I'd been just as rude back.

And then all the things he'd said in the bathroom sunk in. I didn't know how I'd missed it before. He was going to kill someone? What the bloody hell? That was inexcusable! I don't care if he was doing it on the Dark Lord's orders, you don't kill! You never kill! It's unforgiveable. Even if his reasons were semi honorable, even if he was semi helpless, he shouldn't kill someone. And it was just my little savior complex that made me comfort him. He was a human. He was hurting. I would comfort. There was nobody that I could have seen crying that I wouldn't comfort. I'd certainly regret it later, but I was desperate to be the savior. It wasn't due to my kindness. It was due to my issues. Nobody saved me, so I saved everybody.

My feet were carrying me towards the hospital wing again. But this time it was with a new purpose. I was going to yell at Draco Malfoy. I was going to tell him that he wasn't good enough for me, and he was going to tell me that I wasn't good enough for him. And we would never speak of it again. And, one day, when he was a different person, the kind of person I could respect, then we'd end up together, maybe. I'd messed with the time frame by figuring out what the prophecy meant, because school boy Draco Malfoy, the arrogant, cruel, death eater, bully wasn't for me. And I had more important things on my mind than him.

I nearly threw open the door of the hospital wing, before realizing that Madame Pomfrey would not appreciate that. I opened the door much more gently, but I stomped to Malfoy's bed.

"Draco Lucius Malfoy!" I shrilly announced

"River Olivia Trife" He cocked one eyebrow at me and gave a sort of half smile.

"You are an utter and complete idiot and I hate you. You're going to fucking kill someone, Malfoy? Kill? Killing is unforgivable. You're an ass."

"And here I thought we had a moment." He drawled, sneering at me.

"A FUCKING MOMENT MALFOY? YOU AND ME? HA!"

"You kissed me back."

"One day, Malfoy, we'll be for each other, but I'm better than you."

"You're better than me? I'm better than you, filthy mudblood!"

"This is exactly why I'm better than you, Draco! You don't know how to treat people! You're proud of being a death eater, you're proud of the assignment Voldemort gave you, you're proud of being a wretched person. I know you are, don't you dare lie to me."

"I couldn't lie to you. I am proud! I've finally done something right for my family. I'm going to redeem them. I'm going to make my father proud. I've been waiting to make him proud my whole life, Trife. I'm not going to give that up because of your stupid morals!"

""Don't you dare try to play the victim here, Malfoy, because I will not fall for it"

"Play the victim? I'm trying to tell you the truth, Trife. I want you to know the truth"

"So tell me the fucking truth, Draco"

"I find you unbearably attractive. I know I'm not good enough for you. I'm trying to sort out my life. I'm trying to figure out my own morals. I'm trying to figure out what I want. But I have to do what I have to do first, River. I have to save my mother and father. Now tell me the fucking truth, River. What do you think of all that?"

"You're right. We're not good enough for each other. I will not stand by and allow you to kill someone, though. Especially because I know the kind of wizard Voldemort would ask you to kill. And that's not okay, not even to save your father and mother."

"What would you do, River? What would you do? The most powerful dark wizard of all time comes to you and says "kill Albus Dumbledore, or Mad Eye Moody, or Nymphadora Tonks, or any other great bloody wizard you know, or I will kill your parents." What the fuck would you do? If you've got an alternate answer, please tell me. Because I'm not ready to be an orphan, River. I'm just not."

"There is no alternate answer. Here are your options: two deatheaters die, or you kill a great wizard, a great person"

"THEY'RE NOT JUST TWO DEATH EATERS TO ME, RIVER, THEY'RE MY PARENTS! And, I know that they're not great people, or great parents, but I love them. And you understand that, you have to, your parents pretend you're dead because they're so fucking terrified and ashamed and jealous of their witch daughter. They lie to the whole world, but you don't hate them."

"They'd never serve someone like Voldemort."

"How do you know, River? How do you know? My parents grew up with these ideas being shoved down their throats, just like I am. And, in their day, there was no Harry Potter telling them that they were wrong. And then, the Dark Lord came along and was a leader of their ideals. As far as they saw it, he was right, just like their parents were right, and their grandparents, and generations of Malfoys before them. Have they questioned their actions? I'm sure. Have they questioned the ideals? No. Do I still love them anyway? Of course! Would I still do anything to save them? Of course! Their childhoods were just like mine is, River. I'm lucky I can still think for myself, and it took me sixteen years to even start to question my parent's morals. Who knows what kind of people my parents would have been without their parents? Who knows what kind of person I'd be without mine? Maybe I'd be Harry Potter, the precious "chosen one" or maybe I wouldn't. Maybe I'd be the same exact person. But, River, I'm not going to forfeit their lives."

"You are weak, Draco. You have no sense of honor. There are people who'd sacrifice their own lives in an instant to get rid of Voldemort."

"Would you?"

"Yes."

"Me too."

"Bull"

"But I'd never, ever sacrifice my parents' lives. Theirs are not mine to sacrifice. Would you force your parents to die in the name of honor? What about Harry, Ginny, Hermione, Terry, Ron? Would you force any of them to die in the name of honor? Would you even force me, Snape, Crabbe or Goyle to die in the name of honor?"

"No. But I would let them."

"My parents aren't ready to die. I wouldn't be letting them. I'd be forcing them. I'm not going to live with that my whole life. I'm just not. Am I making any sense at all?"

"Yes." I admitted, begrudgingly.

"So we understand each other."

"Yes. But this doesn't mean we're going to be together Draco. I can't be with you."

"Something you said is right."

"What?"

"I'm weak. I need someone strong. I need someone solid. I need an actual friend who will actually try to help me with my problems."

"I'll be your friend, Draco. I don't think it could be any other way after this conversation. Not after everything you've told me, I couldn't go back."

"Your friends aren't going to be happy about it."

"No, they aren't. Hell, I don't think I'm happy about it!" I threw my hands up, exasperated.

"You should go now. Madame Pomfrey should be back soon to check on me." He turned away from me.

"Do you need anything?"

"No." He said and I started to walk away. "Actually… could you bring me parchment and a pen? I need to write my parents"

"Of course, I'll bring it before I go to bed tonight. Anything else"

"No, thanks River."

"Anytime." I was almost out the door when he spoke again.

"Um… actually… can you ask Blaise, Crabbe or Goyle to bring me the bag of sweets from my room? And if you'd bring me the Daily Prophet in the morning, that would be awesome."

"Of course. I'll talk to one of them tonight, and I'll make sure you get the paper"

"Thank you so much, River. You have no idea what it means."

"Anytime. Bye Draco.

"Bye River" I had one foot out the door when I turned around one more time.

"Oh, and Draco?"

"Yes?"

"It's Trife in public still"

"And it's Malfoy in public still"

"Glad we're on the same page" I finished walking out the door and started rushing towards the Great Hall, contemplating all the way how I was going to manage to talk to any of Draco's little cronies.

I decided not to contemplate my discussion with the trio, Ginny and Terry just yet.