DISCLAIMER: This was originally intended as a collaboration years ago, but unfortunately due to time constraints that didn't come to fruition. It is now a single-author work and is comprised solely of content written by myself. (Please don't read the previous pieces and think I am failing to give credit where credit is due!) The film Megamind and all characters therein are the intellectual property of DreamWorks. This fan fiction was written entirely for entertainment purposes and I in no way profit from it. All original characters in this work are fictional, and similarities to any person or persons are completely unintentional.
It was a big decision to make.
Granted, Roxanne Ritchi always thought this sort of thing was an important decision. She was a responsible adult, after all, and a professional woman. Since adolescence, she'd prided herself on being highly practical and even more intelligent– certainly too intelligent to let emotions and hormones get the best of her. No, Roxanne was always extremely circumspect when choosing which men she took to her bed. Sex was intended to make babies, and no matter how careful a girl was, sometimes it did just that. Her cousin Theresa, who had conceived her youngest child while she and her husband were using both condoms and pills, was living proof. While she respected each woman's right to make her own choice, Roxanne personally didn't believe in abortions. The result was that she never slept with a man if she thought she might regret having his child.
This meant that she had passed up the most popular (and least intelligent) guy in high school, as well as a hot-but-irresponsible would-be novelist in college, and a dreamy-but-arrogant young Metro City lawyer. Hell, she'd never even slept with Metro Man, despite the entire city had presuming otherwise. And the former hero's not being her type was only one reason it had been easy to say no. Roxanne hadn't wanted a relationship that came with that many complications… Yet now she was considering sleeping with his rival, the city's new Defender, who was even more visibly extraterrestrial.
That was really the sticking point for Roxanne: he wasn't human. The thought of making love to Megamind didn't bother her. She adored him for who he was– a realization which had come soon after she discovered that her dates with "Bernard" hadn't been with Bernard at all. No, what concerned her was what other people might think. Certainly, Metro Man was just as alien, but he didn't look it, and people had always tended to overlook his origins. If he had any human lovers, (something she neither knew nor cared to learn details about,) the general public would be less likely to judge. She, however, was going to be the first woman to sleep an obviously non-human person– unless, of course, one believed all those old myths about half-gods, which she didn't. At any rate, no one would be able to deny that she would definitely be the first modern woman to have sex with someone so overtly alien, and that was sure to stir up trouble.
She wasn't particularly worried about herself– years in the public eye had acclimated her to criticism of everything from her political stances to her hair– but Megamind… After decades of lonely distrust he'd finally found approval and acceptance. All of Metro City had grown to love him. When they went out, people flocked to her blue beau for autographs, or to ask what his latest invention was. (He always answered the latter with a knowing look and a superior "it's top-secret," which probably meant everything he'd tried so far had failed.) A local rap artist had written lyrics praising the villain-turned-hero, and Megamind loved the gesture despite the fact he preferred classic metal, jazz, soul, and a plethora of other music that didn't seem to fit into any genre. (He was the only person she'd ever met who listened to things like dubstep violin and Beethoven played on electric guitar.) Even the toy shops had started selling Megamind masks, playsets, and plushies. Yes, he had finally been embraced with open arms, but would that continue if people learned he and Roxanne were physically involved? She couldn't bear to see him cast back into revilement. It would tear her soul apart to watch him endure looks of dark disgust, to see bleak pain haunting his eyes at every snide joke about Stockholm Syndrome and tentacle porn. And if they had a baby? What would the world say about the first half-human child?
Roxanne's logical side argued that a majority of the populace probably already assumed they were banging each other. After all, they went on public dates, and he often visited her apartment, sometimes staying late into the night. When the question had come up during an interview– an odd experience for Roxanne, who was usually on the other side of the microphone– she had danced expertly around the subject, mainly because she felt it was nobody's business. Only later had she considered that that had almost certainly fueled rumors. Yes, people had likely made assumptions, and it seemed most of them, at least, were fine with the idea. There was an uncertain, treacherous part of Roxanne, however, that whispered that rumors and certain knowledge were two very different things. Rumors could be ignored, discounted, but... If she became his lover, if the public found out… People would not accept it. Would not like it. Would not allow it.
It was a big decision to make, with even bigger potential consequences.
She had always considered herself an intellectual maverick of sorts– someone who just needed a chance to stand against social injustice. During college, she had joined the Student Environmental Collective and, despite being straight, the LGBT Rights Association. As a young assistant journalist, she had helped raise money for everything from battered women's shelters to third world literacy programs. Once she began fighting her way toward the top, she had envisioned herself becoming an activist journalist, going behind the scenes to tell viewers what was really going on and standing up for the truth no matter what. When she read historical fiction, she had felt certain that if she had lived during World War One, she would have been a nurse or a spy, and if she had lived in the Old South, she would have been part of the Underground Railroad.
Dreams like that had muted slightly after a few years in the professional world, where everything was about bottom lines and top dollars, but she had still clung on to them. Spunky and determined, she had covered even the most terrifying and heart-rending stories without flinching, and she had reported exactly what she found, regardless of what temptations or threats were offered. She had single-handedly broken two different corruption scandals wide open, and all because she wouldn't back down.
That had helped earn her a place as a top reporter, although if she was honest, it might never have happened if she hadn't gained the interest of both Metroman and Megamind. The first had become infatuated with her sense of justice when they met at a fundraiser, and the second, allegedly discovering the attraction of the first, had immediately started kidnapping her on a regular basis. That had been terrifying in the beginning, but she had quickly realized that Megamind would never actually harm her. It was all an odd game for him. Kidnap the city's favorite female reporter, entice a mooning Metroman to rescue her, and test out his newest inventions before being hauled off the prison. It almost seemed as if his only reason for becoming a super-villain was boredom. Roxanne hated the "damsel-in-distress" routine, but she couldn't deny that it had catapulted her into professional success. That, however, had not been what really drove her to accept her role as the damsel. Loathe though she'd been to admit it, she found her talks with Megamind oddly enjoyable. Figuring out his latest plots was like the world's most exciting brain-teaser, and she loved irritating him by pretending his schemes had been entirely too easy to unravel. And then there was the strangely congenial banter, the teasing, the playfulness.
Last June had brought a real threat to the city, Titan, whom she and Megamind now jokingly called "Tighten." And when Metro City and Roxanne had truly been in danger, Megamind had stepped up to the plate and saved the day. That was when she had finally admitted she was in love with him. She'd seen his heart of gold underneath bad boy image and black leather, and it had stolen her own. Learning that he was attentive, funny, and charming during her days with the fake Bernard had helped, but the day he defeated Titan had been the clincher. That day she'd kissed him, knowing who he was, and she had purposefully deactivated his disguise so that the whole world would know, too. She wanted to prove that she wasn't ashamed of him. She wanted the entire city to see who it was she loved.
It had not taken her long to realize that maybe that was her social injustice to face– the life of a man who had been ill-treated since infancy because he wasn't "normal" enough– and she looked forward to conquering it. Because she knew who he really was. Because she loved him.
And yet she had never slept with him. The monumental ramifications of taking that step with her non-human boyfriend frightened her, and some small part of her, she realized, had thought that maybe if she avoided the subject, she could pretend those uncomfortable implications away.
It was a big decision to make, and that scared her.
Roxanne had given up on long-term relationships before she started dating the blue hero, having decided that there were simply no men who could fit themselves comfortably into her life. She'd supposed it was her own fault; she was a walking paradox, craving both reverent love and unfettered independence. In all of her past relationships, her partners had either been too detached– like the one who was glad to give her needed professional space, but refused to do "silly and sentimental" things like surprise her with flowers– or too conservative– like the one who had thought she would be thrilled to hear him say he would "take care of her" so she "wouldn't have to work anymore." Worn out by emotional failures, Roxanne had dived into her career, finally deciding that, clearly, professionalism and love didn't blend well.
And then along came Megamind– charming, intelligent, romantic, foolishly sentimental, and bravely independent. After so many dead ends, and after years of dejected resolution, Roxanne had accidentally stumbled upon the proverbial Mr. Right. She'd thought their first "real" date– the first one when she actually knew who she was dating– would be awkward, but their relationship had essentially picked back up where Roxanne and "Bernard" had left off. Her romance with Megamind seemed almost too good to be true. He was neither too concerned about impressing her, nor too blasé about wooing her. In all his years of flirting, Metroman had never even tried to find out what her favorite flower was. Megamind had taken note when she mentioned in passing how much she loved the yellow daisies in the park, and on Valentine's Day her apartment had been filled with them. Ever since then, yellow daisies arrived at her office every other Thursday, just like clockwork, and Roxanne didn't even mind that some of the interns always became girlish and giggly about it. Contrastingly, if she had to break a date with him because she was suddenly sent to cover a hot new story, or found herself stuck with an overdue deadline, he never complained. He never asked if her job was more important than him. He just said he understood and would be catching up on work in the Lair if she had time to drop by on the way home. Usually, he also sent over a packed dinner- deliciously prepared by Minion and delivered via brainbot- with a note that said something like: "You won't forget to eat, will you? Love, MM."
Similarly, Roxanne never allowed self-conscious concerns to arise when his duties got in the way of their plans. She had gotten into the habit of cooking for him once a week, (something she had not even done for herself when she was single,) texting him random pictures she knew would make him smile, and stopping by his lab on Saturday mornings with three lattes and a box of doughnuts. (He and Minion shared an addiction to coffee and doughnuts that was both adorable and a little disturbing.) She loved surprising him with little gifts: a blue teddy bear dressed in black leather, a second-hand album by a classic metal band, a love letter hidden among the suspended notes of his current idea cloud. Once she had even brought a package of tennis balls for the brainbots to play with. Such tiny, everyday expressions of love had become the bedrock on which she and Megamind's relationship was built.
He knew her, really knew her, and fully embraced who she was. Aside from occasional dinners at nice restaurants, he skipped typical dates in favor of afternoons browsing bookstores, weekend trips exploring small museums and odd roadside attractions, and long days in the park. Even most of the meals he took her to catered to their shared love for the unique and adventurous. He found hidden gems with exceptional cuisine, hole-in-the-wall spots offering authentic international dishes, and small, artsy cafes where proprietors with dyed hair and piercings served up great coffee and even better pastries. She and Megamind basked in sharing simple joys like bicycle rides, sunsets, and kite flying. (The last became infinitely more entertaining as it usually turned into an areal game of tag with the brainbots.) She could talk to him like no one else, laughing and chatting about anything and everything until she realized, with a start, that hours had passed. What they had was extremely special; she knew that. So why was she still waiting- especially when she longed for more? Did she really want to keep holding a part of herself back from him forever?
It was a big decision to make, but Roxanne had to make it.
The time had come. It was that simple. She and Megamind had been dating for nearly five months while summer turned into autumn and slowly edged toward winter. In that time she had become something of an unofficial second sidekick. Although Megamind had insisted she not get involved with the dangerous Doom Syndicate, together they had stopped several ordinary criminals and had overcome two minor would-be villains. (The first was an ex-model with a scarred face and a terrible idea of revenge, and the second a balding man with a crazy scheme to make park pigeons emulate Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds." That plan had been a monumental failure even by Megamind's standards. The chemical compound that Ravenous, as he called himself, had fed the birds had only succeeded in giving them excessive diarrhea.) Throughout these small victories, Roxanne and Megamind had proven that they consistently made a great team. Recently, he had even begun sharing unfinished plans with her– something he had never before done with anyone except Minion– and asking her for input. The three of them had spent more than one night discussing plans, pooling their intellectual resources over cups of espresso. She and Megamind had had a few arguments– what couple didn't?– but he always let her win, waiting until later when he could logically explain his side of the disagreement to a much cooler and more reasonable Roxanne. Things had become serious, and Roxanne knew that they couldn't continue much longer in this state of limbo.
What had really woken her up to the situation had been the day she realized that she, like everyone she railed against, was treating him differently. If he had been human, she would already be his lover. He was by far the best man she'd ever known. Unlike Metro Man, he didn't confine her to the role of a helpless maiden to be saved. He told her she was smart, capable, and brave. He treated her like an equal, or sometimes more like a goddess. Nearly every man she'd ever been involved with had tried to talk her into bed, but not Megamind. Years of solitude had left him with the desperate sex drive of a teenage boy– as became obvious, even through the tight leather, every time he held her close– yet he had never once pushed her. More importantly than anything else, he saw her as the fiery do-gooder she had once been, helped her to become that person again. He shared the limelight with her and called her heroic. No matter what life threw her way, he was always there, offering empathy and emotional support. And yet here she was, holding back. It couldn't go on. Either she gave herself to him fully, her body as well as her heart, or they broke things off. She hated even considering the latter option. It hurt just to think about it. She loved him, regardless of what he was or what people thought or how complicated dating a hero could be. Whatever else happened, she couldn't bear to lose him.
It was a big decision to make, but in the end it was an easy one.