Secrets Unknown

Chapter Six: "Cheering Up"

29th of December 2003

Over a whole week has gone by without me writing in this journal. George and I went home for Christmas and if anyone saw me writing in a journal there they would become suspicious. George especially considering we were sharing a room. I almost went mad without writing these thoughts down and I am glad to be back in my own room, being able to write whatever I want.

I thought that seeing my family again, happy and together, would make me come out of this slump I have fallen into. But it only made things worse. Seeing them so happy only made me see that I am no longer like them. I cannot be part of their group anymore because I am so different.

All those years at school with people telling us how brilliant we were because of the things we invented or how funny we were because of the destruction we had caused. And what did it come to?

George turned the page and shuddered as he saw yet another page of Fred's handwriting spilling all the secrets that George wished he didn't know and yet could not stop reading.

Nothing, that's what it came to. And here we are, three years out of school and working in a joke shop. It's so pathetic. There are people in our store everyday, buying our useless junk to try on one of their friends or to get out of class and on days when Hogwarts students are allowed out into Hogsmeade, even people I know come into the store and purchase this stuff and I want to scream at them all to stop acting to childishly. But I cannot. And that is why I write in a journal that no one will ever read.

George could not believe what he was reading. The joke shop had been Fred's idea and here he was rubbishing it and saying how immature it was. Feeling a small surge of anger at his departed twin he turned to the next entry. Dated the first day of the previous year.

1st January 2004

Great, it's a new year and the things that seemed so wrong last year feel even worse this year. I saw Hermione at the New Years Eve party and she told me about some muggle tradition of new years resolutions. My new years resolutions are to stop being so weak and go ahead with what I want to do. I am so weak for being scared of the pain. So pathetic. That's what I am. I am pathetic. I am barely even a human being any more.

Angelina came over today. She said she had something important to tell me. She told me she is moving closer to Hogsmeade so I can see her more. I am happy about that. I truly am but then I think about what could happen when she sees me so...bizarre. Last time I slept with her she asked me how I got the cut on my arm. I told her I hurt it on one of our tools and she seemed to accept it. It scarred nicely.

George blanched when he read the entry from the 1st of January. He knew that some people hurt themselves but he never dreamed his own best friend would do something like that. George had never fully quite understood that concept. When he hurt himself, he did whatever he could do make it heal. And the Fred he thought he knew, used to whinge like a child whenever he stubbed his toe.

Reading this journal began to seem so surreal. George knew, of course, that he was reading his twin's most secret thoughts. And yet, to him, it seemed merely that he was reading a fictional book about a troubled boy. This was, perhaps, the only thing stopping George from going mad entirely.

George sat in his room for two hours, reading random entries from his brother's diary. Some were troubling like the one from the first of January but then there were ones simply describing his day that made George realise with a huge burst of relief that his brother had not totally lost it. Just as he was approaching March, someone tried the door and upon finding it locked, knocked gently.

"George?" Angelina's voice came from the other side of the door.

George shut the diary and put it underneath the covers of his bed before crossing to the door and opening it to let Angelina in.

"Sorry," she said, flustered at the thought she had to interrupt George in his own bedroom, "I just had to get my purse." Grabbing a black bag from off the floor where her suitcase sat, contents spilling out of it, she turned around again and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" George asked her and she whirled around.

"Out," she told him miserably.

"And you're unhappy about this?" George asked her as she checked inside her purse for something.

"Well," Angelina stopped rushing and sat down on the bed, "Katie and Alicia are taking me out for lunch and a bit of shopping. To cheer me up, I suppose," she said wearily.

"And you don't want to be cheered up?" George enquired.

"I don't think I really can be," Angelina admitted.

A moment passed when nothing was said between the two before Angelina got t her feet once again.

"Well, I should probably go. They'll be waiting for me." Angelina opened the door before looking back, "do you want to come?" she asked George who shook his head.

"Girl's day out? I'll pass, thanks," he said with a slight smile, which Angelina tried to return. When her smiled wavered she sighed.

"This day better cheer me up," she said sadly as she disappeared out of the door.

George watched her leave from the window then sat back down on his bed.

"Cheering up," he muttered under his breath. Pulling the journal out from under the covers he stared at it before leaning over and putting back in the box under Fred's old bed, "yeah right."

Short and sweet eh? Sorry it was pretty crap but at least there was some more diary entries and a bit more Angelina although there will be more in the next chapter I promise! REVIEW!!!!

A HUGE thankyou to DracoM'sGrl, ignorencereekstruth, insertgoodnamehere (LOVE your name haha!), Yokai Cesia and Chi, angelface04, padfootlives101 and Short2ndbase613 for being my reviewers. You make my day :)