September 21, 2008
Dear YOU,
See? I don't call you by your pet name anymore, because I know you're not him. I was thinkin of the time we were happy, where every on eof us were together as friends. But my thought always ended up on you. Do you remember after I told you a liked you, a little later you told me you liked me too? You stole away kisses from me,you always caught me off guard... Do you remember how much time we spent chatting? It was more the time that we said good bye and I love you than the actual conversation. I remember clearly when you whispered in my ear that you loved me, that you thought I looked beautiful, and when you wanted a kiss you simply stole one, you always had the luck the teacher never caught you, she always or went out of the class or just ignored us that you just quickly peck my lips so you'd be satisfied. Yes, I remember it clearly... What happen to that? When you said I love you did you lie? You have no idea how many time that question has invaded my mind, along with questions like, have I ever ment anything at all to him? Have I lost him?... I'm afraid, I'm afraid of the answer. But I want to know it, because I can't stand this anymore, being all day long wondering if you still want me in your life. Everytime I try to get near you just make an expression as if you don't want me there... Damn it if you don't love me I think I deserve to know! Don't you think? I think I deserve a letter telling me the answers of all those question that don't let me sleep at night... Don't you think I do? You're the first...to whom I've given everything to. Alot of people tell me I'm stupid for still being with you. Well they can keep calling me stupid, because hose words...I just can't get them out of my mouth... It's the same as saying good-bye hahaha remember that I told you that was a bad word? Well for me saying good-bye in this circumstances is a sin. I'm sorry for lovin you, I'm sorry for making you my everything, I'm sorry for being in your life, sorry I met you, I'm sorry for crossing your path and finally...I'm sory for giving you my heart. But you know what? Keep it, your name is already engraved on it and maybe, most likely it will stay there forever. For me you're that other half people always talk about, but maybe I'm not yours. PLease I beg you, don't hurt me anymore. I know you don't do it unporpous but please stop. I'll always love you with everything I have... I wish for you the best of things, full of happiness and well being. I love you...I would say as a friend...but I'd be lying.
Yours truelly,
ME
(today and forever)