Oh, Padmé, Padmé, Padmé...!

Today is our 18th wedding anniversary. At least I think it's the 18th, because it's so hard to keep track of time when one spends nearly every moment of every day in this awful, stifling metal bucket. It's hot, and sweaty, and sometimes I swear, Padmé it feels like my freaking helmet is closing in on me and I want to scream because I can barely breathe, and all I can hear is the sound of my own blood rushing in my ears - and it's horrible, Padmé, horrible... and then the spots swim before my eyes and it makes me so angry, Padmé... so angry -

You know why I'm angry, Padmé? Because it's kriffing unfair, that's why! I had lovely brown hair once - a head full of it. Remember how you used to lie next to me at night and run your hands through my hair while we - Oh, Force - you were such a turn-on... you still are, Padmé. When I can find a spare moment. in between briefings.

See, Padmé? You were wrong. I can joke! I just made a joke. Debriefings between briefings. Ha, ha, ha.

Force, I miss hearing your voice so much. This year I really made an effort just for you. Because I know that you would not have wanted me to forget you or our wedding, it was so special: just you and me and the droids - we could have stayed like that for ages, Padmé... the four of us - why the kriff did you have to go and get yourself pregnant for? I thought you were smarter than that.

But the point is, I made an effort. And now I'm so kriffing pissed off and mad because I was supposed to go to your family's little home on Naboo, but as usual, some jackasses had to kriff things up here - oh, I forgot to tell you, Padmé! Your family home is safe. Nobody will ever disturb anything in it, ever again. Everything inside it - the furniture, the carpets, the rugs, the dishes in the kitchen - everything will stay as it was the day I first went to your home.

Your room, and your little bed, and that chest of drawers you kept your papers in - yes, nothing will ever change from now on. Oh, I've had to plan for so long, Padmé! Just to get things to be the way that I wanted them to be. Your family didn't like my idea! They made things so difficult for me, Padmé - I swear, I didn't want to cause them any more grief than was strictly necessary... but they made things so difficult, with their refusing to move out and insisting that it was their property, that the Empire had no rights to be there... Utter rubbish...! The Emperor is supreme, and his word is law: how dare your family think to challenge an Imperial edict?

Do you know your fool grandmother actually had the idiot idea to file a contesting suit? ...She forced my hand, Padmé. She forced my hand! I could have forgotten about her meddling and how she tried to rake up all that muck about how, how I was responsible for your death - can you believe that, Padmé? Me! Responsible! The slander! I never hurt you, Padmé... I never did, I swear - I was never angry at you, only the Jedi... and I killed them all, all; all I wanted to do was frighten you, maybe knock some sense into you -

No! It's not my fault you died - I'm not responsible, don't look at me like that, Padmé -

I'll tell you who was karking responsible - it was that karking Obi-Wan bastard: he stole you from me, he lied to you about me, he made you believe things that were not true and he blinded you, Padmé - you were always so innocent and trusting and good and pure that you would never have believed the things I could tell you about him - but that's the tragedy of it all... oh, Padmé - what a betrayal! You were supposed to stand with me... by my side as I conquered the galaxy - for you, for us! Bringing peace and stability to all the people we could reach, and you know the Force has always been strong with me - there is nothing I would not, cannot accomplish: and I wanted you to be there by my side when I did it!

But you were not. Can you blame me, Padmé? Can you blame me for wanting to preserve some small memory of you?

So I had to put a stop to her meddling. First the muckraking, and then she contests the Empire's seizure of your family's property. So I had to... resort to... other means.

Don't worry, Padmé. It wasn't too inconvenient for me. Just a... little more expensive than I'd have liked, but like you said - one gets what one pays for, and that Boba Fett guy really is the best assassin around for parsecs.

Of course, if your stupid grandmother and aunt hadn't been so persistent, I'd have been spared the expense... but you are worth anything, anything to me, Padmé. I would bleed the galaxy dry ten times, a hundred times over, if it would please you. Would it please you, Padmé? Understand, my dear - often one has to kill many in order to spare a few. That's just the way life is. You were always too soft to be decisive.

But at least now, you can rest knowing that your family home has been preserved, just the way it was, when you still lived there. Next year, I will give you your old Senatorial apartment in Coruscant. I hear your sister lives there now. Let us hope she is more sensible than your other relations.