Suffering is the Best Punishment

by shannyfish

Takes Place during Season Two. Red John attacks Jane using his own twisted type of psychological warfare.

6. In a Flash

Title: Suffering is the Best Punishment
Author: Shannon - shannyfish
Disclaimer: I do not own "The Mentalist" or its characters, CBS does. This is merely for entertainment purposes only.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Takes Place during Season Two. Red John attacks Jane using his own twisted type of psychological warfare.
Warning: Severe spoilers for season one.

Chapter 6 – "In a Flash"

Author's Note: WOO! 50 reviews on alone! Thanks! I'm glad everyone is enjoying this! Perhaps I may write another "The Mentalist" fic once this one is done.

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"It's always darkest before the dawn" – Proverb

CBI Headquarters

Another day.

A day with Lisbon.

She arrived with Van Pelt once again. Jane was waiting. He'd been expecting her. Though, he had wanted her to be there a bit earlier. He got up from his couch and hurried towards her. He had offered to stay with her, in order to give Van Pelt a break, but he'd been turned down.

"Calm down, Jane," Van Pelt said.

He stopped once his hand was on Lisbon's arm. "Good morning, Ladies," he greeted brightly. Jane had truthfully had a hard time sleeping; he'd been kept awake thinking about Lisbon. It wasn't just that she'd returned, but also what she'd endured. What secrets lay in her memories? Untapped.

"Someone's chipper this morning," Van Pelt commented.

"Maybe he wants something," Lisbon said.

"I want a lot of things, but they'll come in time if they're meant to be," Jane told her. "And plus, I would never take advantage of your current situation in order to gain something."

"You wouldn't would you?"

He could hear the amusement in her voice. He smiled in response. "Of course not. That would be wrong," Jane told her as he led her towards her office. Minelli had told her to take it easy, but that he didn't mind her being there. After all, they all hoped that it helped with her memory. It also made it easy to ensure that she made it to the doctors' appointments that had been made in order to keep an eye on both her memory and her eyes.

"At least not with you," Jane added after a moment.

"I wouldn't take him at his word," Cho warned.

"I'm hurt," Jane said as he clutched his heart as if he'd been wounded. Wounded by Cho's traitorous words. He gave him a smile just the same.

"Cho's right," Van Pelt spoke up. "Jane's not one that can be trusted all the time. Though, I don't think he'd take advantage of your current condition, at least not the blindness."

Jane thought that was interesting. He looked over to Van Pelt. "You'd think I'd take advantage of her memory?"

"If it came in handy."

"I'm going to agree with Van Pelt on this one," Rigsby spoke up.

Jane looked over at him, a smile still firmly planted on his face. "Traitor." He wasn't hurt, though. He didn't feel like anything could hurt him.

.............................

En Route to Crime Scene

"Are you sure you want to go?" Rigsby asked for about the tenth time.

"I'm sure," Lisbon responded. "I know I can't do anything, but maybe the sounds will jog my memory."

Jane was sitting in the backseat. For the first seven times Rigsby had asked her, he'd defended her quickly. Of course, he was a bit biased. He wanted Lisbon there. He wanted her there at all times. Letting her out of their sight was not an option and since Cho and Van Pelt were in the other vehicle, the only option as for her to go with them.

It didn't take long for them to arrive at the crime scene they'd been called out to. It wasn't far from CBI headquarters, which was fortunate. Jane didn't think he could put up with driving for that long, especially since he wanted to talk to Lisbon, though he'd prefer to do it in private. He didn't need Rigsby passing on anything he said to Van Pelt. Currently, Van Pelt was extremely protective of Lisbon. He had a feeling that she had some odd feeling of protectiveness in order to ensure that no one took advantage of her.

Jane got out of the vehicle about the same time as Rigsby. He watched as Lisbon swung her door open as well. He closed his door and then waited. He watched. Waited. He'd be there if she tripped or fell. He wasn't going to let her fall face first into the grass or sidewalk. But she surprised him. She closed the door and then felt for the curb with her toe. He noticed that she did this as subtly as possible. Lisbon kept her eyes straight ahead and then stepped up when she felt it.

Unexpected.

A gun shot rang out.

The crime scene should have been swept and deemed clear hours ago. Jane saw Rigsby moving towards Lisbon, but Jane already had her arm. His right hand was on her arm and his left was around her shoulders, so as to guide her as easily as possible. She already had her head down, and he lowered his as well. He guided her around the vehicle they'd just arrived in for safety.

The others: Cho, Van Pelt, and Rigsby were already on alert; they'd scrambled for cover behind the black vehicles as well. Their guns were out and they were obviously trying to figure out where the person was firing from and possibly their target. So far, Jane didn't think they'd hit either of the vehicles. He felt that that was a good sign.

At first he listened to the chatter between the team.

"Where are the locals?" Rigsby asked.

"Detective Jareld was supposed to be here to meet us," Cho responded.

"He could possibly be a victim of the shooter," Van Pelt suggested.

"We need to call for back up," Rigsby told them.

But then he tuned them out.

Turning to Lisbon, his arm was still around her and his hand still on her arm. She was frozen. They were crouching together, their backs up against the smooth exterior of the vehicle they'd arrived in. The shooting continued, but nothing had hit them still. Jane wanted to look, but knew that not only would he be leaving Lisbon but he'd also end up getting yelled at by the others.

She was shaking a bit. That was what first caught his attention. When he turned to really look at her, he noticed that her green eyes were wide and waiting. Jane could only image that she was confused and scared. After all, she didn't remember. He'd never seen Lisbon like that. She seemed so...fragile. Teresa Lisbon was not a woman he'd normally label in that way.

Fragile.

Breakable.

Vulnerable.

"It's going to be alright," he tried to assure in a soothing tone. He hadn't wanted her to be frightened, though he hoped that something came back.

"I'm fine," she lied.

He could see right through the lie. Lisbon was still shaking. He was about to tell her that she wasn't fine, to argue with her, when the window above them shattered. Shards of class came showering down over them both. He shook a bit before opening his eyes and looking over at her.

"Jane! Are you guys okay?"

The question came from Rigsby. Jane reached out and started to brush the glass from Lisbon. "We're okay," he responded. "We're okay," Jane said, this time to Lisbon. He made sure that she was free of glass particles before trying to do the same for himself.

"Maybe this was a stupid idea," Lisbon spoke up.

Jane noticed that the shots had stopped. He looked over and noticed that Cho, Rigsby, and Van Pelt were trying to assess the situation. He looked back to Lisbon. He released her arm and she immediately grabbed him. "It's okay," he told her. When her grip loosened, Jane reached into his vest pocket. He'd kept it with him and in a way didn't want to give it back.

Lisbon's cross.

It had been kept safe in his vest pocket. He'd told himself that he'd return it to her when they found her, but he hadn't. He'd kept it. It'd been a reminder of the Lisbon he remembered. But now, she was scared. Jane hated to see her in such an unknown state.

"This is yours," Jane told her. He put the cross in her hand, but brought the necklace up around her neck and clasped it in place. Jane had wanted her to be able to feel the pendant, so she knew what it was. He hoped that it would give her some sense of peace.

"Thanks."

She was quiet and Jane returned his hand and arm back to their previous positions. He looked over to see that Rigsby was motioning to the other two. Something was going on. "What's going on?" Jane finally whispered. With the window blown out above him, he didn't want to be the next thing blown away.

"We're going to surround the place before he gets a chance to escape," Rigsby told him quickly before he ran away from the cover of the vehicle.

"Stay put," Van Pelt added as she and Cho also left them.

"Are they going to be okay?" Lisbon asked after a moment.

"Sure," Jane told her, trying to sound confident.

"I thought they called for back-up."

"They did."

"They're not here yet."

Jane smiled a bit. "You're right. They should be."

"Well, what if they need help?"

He watched as Lisbon's hand reached down to her side, like she was instinctively looking for her gun. Maybe she was remembering. Jane wasn't sure. All he knew was that he suddenly felt like this was a bad plan. Of course, most times they knew ahead of time if there was a problem – like someone running around a crime scene with a gun. This time there had been no warning.

"They can take care of themselves," Jane told her. It was true. He knew that they could, but that didn't mean that he didn't worry. He did. After all, they were his friends and the closest things to family he had at the moment. Right now, though, he needed to stay with Lisbon. That was what was needed, what was best.

"They are CBI agents."

"They are. They have shiny badges even."

He watched the smile spread across her face. It was a simple pleasure. Her smile. It was like the sun. Jane couldn't help, but smile in return.

And then it happened so fast. The sound of running in their direction. The shouting. The gunshots. Normally, this was something that he saw coming, but Jane blamed his distraction on Lisbon. He'd been far too focused on her. A man with a gun ran in their direction, right down the middle of the street. Jane assumed that he was the one who had shot out the window above where he and Lisbon waited.

Though the vehicles didn't carry any CBI logos, they were black SUVs and obviously law enforcement. He stood up and held his hands up to show that he didn't mean any harm. Jane moved in front of Lisbon, pulling her to her feet behind him with a hand. He acted as a shield. He was determined not to let anything else happen to her.

"Jane," she whispered.

He knew that she had to be wondering why they were standing. Lisbon wasn't stupid. She knew something was going on. He didn't want to tell her the truth though. Jane just wanted the guy to run right by. It wasn't like they were armed.

"Stay still," he told her.

"Why?"

"Just stay still!"

The man came to a halt and surveyed them. He had a feeling that the man was making sure they weren't going to be shot. "We're not armed," Jane offered. He hoped that it was enough to appease him. After all, the rest of the team wasn't far behind.

Protect Lisbon.

The gun rose. Jane just stared at the barrel. He had no training in this area. He only knew to talk. To distract him long enough to give the others a chance to get there. "You don't want to shoot me."

"Jane?" Lisbon spoke up.

"Shhh..." he shushed and turned his attention back to the man. "I suggest you keep running. We're not a threat to you. We're both unarmed."

Protect Lisbon.

When the man didn't move, Jane made sure that he was shielding Lisbon. Just in case. He'd ensure her safety, even if it meant his life. He'd happily give it for her.

Protect Lisbon.

He didn't waver. Jane swallowed and knew what was to come before the man even pulled the trigger. He'd seen it in his eyes. Lisbon would freak out. He hated to know that she'd go through it, but the others weren't far behind. Cho, Rigsby, and especially Van Pelt would see that she was taken care of. Comforted.

Protect Lisbon.

Jane tried to keep his voice calm. "Lisbon, listen to me," he said quickly. "Everything's going to be okay. No matter what. Everything's going to be okay."

The shot.

He heard it before he felt anything. The shot froze his world. He could suddenly feel his body absorbing the bullet and its impact. Everything unfroze, but stayed in a state of slow motion for a time. The faces of his friends, terror...panic... Another shot. This time, it wasn't one meant for him.

Protect Lisbon.

Turning, Jane took in Lisbon's shocked and worried face as he started to fall to the ground. She was unharmed. He turned his head in the direction of the man who's shot him; he was already on the ground. Bleeding. Dying. The ground took him soon after and he struggled to breathe.

Jane had always heard that being shot and bleeding to death was something in which your body went cold, but right now he felt warm. His chest felt warm and enveloped. Like his chest had been submerged in warm water. It was almost comforting in a way.

"Jane!" Lisbon shouted.

She was panicking, Jane quickly recognized. She was moving away from the vehicle, he'd pressed her against it for her own safety. Her arms were outstretched and she was searching for him. "Stay where you are," he told her, though his voice betrayed his condition. It wavered for a moment.

"Where are you?" she asked.

Protect Lisbon.

He didn't want her to see him in such a state, even if she couldn't see. He was afraid that she'd stop remembering. That it would all be too traumatic. She started to crouch down and feel the ground. Jane knew that she wouldn't stop; he reached out and took her hand.

Jane watched as the others ran towards them, Cho quickly kicked the gun away from the man. Jane assumed he was dead. Cho was checking. Rigsby was calling it in. Van Pelt was making her way to Lisbon. She'd protect Lisbon for him.

"Are you okay?" Lisbon asked.

Her hands worriedly searched him. Lisbon's hands found his face and she traced the contours of it. Jane wondered if she was memorizing it, like he'd tried to do when she'd been smiling before when he was suffering from temporary blindness. He allowed it.

"I'll be fine," Jane tried to assure, his voice a bit weak.

"He shot you!"

Her voice was almost hysterical. Jane noticed that her hands started to search for the wound. "I'll be okay. Rigsby has already called for emergency services."

"Grace has already got pressure on it," Jane said as Van Pelt crouched down on his right. He knew that that was why she was there.

"She does?" Lisbon asked.

"I've got it," Van Pelt spoke up. "The ambulance will be here in two minutes," she promised.

He believed her. Jane cringed a bit as Van Pelt's hands clamped down on the wound. He'd survive. He was sure. If not, he was sure he'd feel a lot worse. Jane adjusted his gaze to stare up at Lisbon. She was worried. Her hand had gone to his and was holding it. It was currently the best feeling in his world. Though, he knew if he could get her to smile, it would be even better. Jane doubted she'd do it in their current situation though.

"It's going to be okay," Lisbon said.

She was trying to be comforting. He was starting to feel tired, but he was trying to find it. Van Pelt was speaking, but he ignored it. Something else caught his attention. Lisbon was shaking her head a bit and blinking her eyes. Her hand went up to her head and Jane started to wonder if she'd been injured. Had he pushed her against the vehicle? Had she hit her head? Different situations and problems started to run through his brain.

"Lisbon," he mumbled and then found that emergency services had arrived and pushed Van Pelt out of the way without his knowledge. Now they were moving Lisbon, who was not leaving his side of her own free will. "Something's wrong with her," Jane told the EMS personnel as he pointed to Lisbon. "I think she has a concussion."

"She doesn't have a concussion," Van Pelt said.

Van Pelt was standing off to the side, with her arm around Lisbon. He'd been keeping an eye on them. He had been reading Van Pelt's lips; she'd been telling Lisbon what the personnel had been doing. At least she was being taken care of.

"You're not paying attention to her," Jane quickly accused as he found himself on a gurney and with his shirt open. When had he given them permission to remove his shirt? He noticed the white gauze taped to where the bullet hole had been. At least he wouldn't bleed to death quickly.

He watched as Van Pelt blinked and glared at him a bit. He was sure it was unintentional. After all, Jane felt he knew Grace Van Pelt enough to know that she really wouldn't be upset with him for pointing out something so crucial. Jane waited and was happy to see that now everyone was paying attention.

"He's right," one of the medics spoke up. "She better ride with us."

"Well, then I'm riding too," Van Pelt said.

"We may not have enough room," the other pointed out.

"He's shot and she's suffering from temporary amnesia and blindness. I'm not letting you take her without someone she knows being with her," Van Pelt said.

Jane smiled and then cringed as the gurney was uncomfortably pulled up and snapped into place at the new raised position. The medics started to hurry to get him into the ambulance, but he kept his eyes on Lisbon. He needed to make sure that they weren't just tricking him to get him to go peacefully. He wouldn't put up with any deception.

He went into the white vehicle first. One medic joined him. Lisbon and Van Pelt next. Then the other medic. Lisbon would still be protected. That was the most important thing right now. As the medic closest to him started to assess his injuries, Jane tried to push his hands away. "Check her first!" he tried to insist.

"Your injuries are more severe."

"I don't care!"

"Jane! Hold still!" Lisbon commanded. "I'm fine! Things are just...blurry..."

"Blurry?" Jane repeated as he stared at her. The world seemed to come to a full stop then. Blurry. Lisbon could see. Blurry. Her blindness was going to be a thing of a past and he hoped with it, her memory loss. The medics worked on him, he could feel it.

Lisbon could see.

...........................................

TBC...