A/N;

Well, I was gonna update 'Forgetmenot', but then I was like 'eh' and decided to update this instead. I'm doing a parody of this on a suggestion from 'feathers189'. I can soooooo work with that idea! Thanks!

I own nothing!

Iggy: Okay, just go right ahead and steal my line.

Rain: I didn't realise you'd become so attached.

Iggy: Well, it's something to do.

Rain: Okay, I take it back. Iggy?

Iggy: Rain owns nothing.

Rain: Good boy. Hehe! R & R-izzle, and get a speckled pumpkin! In all it's glory! :D:D:D:D

Iggy: Speckled pumpkin...?

Rain: Uhuh. Inside joke. I told my friend to post her story or I'd throw a speckled pumpkin at her. There have been references made to speckled pumpkins in three stories now. Total takes over, Amazing Cliches, and her new story 'Animated'. Go read it, btw. By Evil Robina. GO!!!

Iggy: Inside voice.

Rain: Stop stealing things I say!!!!

Iggy: INSIDE VOICE!!!!!!

Rain: Geez Ig, take your own advice. -smiles-

Iggy: -rolls eyes- Whatever. I'm going to make tacos.

Rain: Make me some! Okay, again, R & R.

Max stared up at her new house with contempt. Max stared at everything with contempt these days, just because she was so full of contempt for everything. Because she was badass, and obviously a badass character in this Alternate Universe should have contempt for stuff, and an indifferent attitude to match. It was supposed to make her seem awesome, but really it just made her look like an ass.

Max's little sister Nudge (no one bothered to ask why two normal girls had names like Max and Nudge, they just did) was bouncing around and talking Portuguese non-stop. In this story, Nudge could speak Portuguese, because she was cool like that. Anyway, she kept asking Max whether she wanted to go eat some oranges.

"I don't want to eat any stinkin' oranges." Max said coldly. Nudge burst into tears. Max sighed. "Oh fine, come on. Let's go get something to eat then, you hyperactive, Portuguese speaking twit." Max smirked to herself. She was soooooo cool 'cause she was mean and stuff. Nudge grinned and began to giggle non-stop, bouncing into the house, presumably to find some oranges.

"Nudge has an orange fetish." Max commented to herself, scuffing her feet as she walked inside. 'Cause badass people scuff their feet. Max wondered things to herself as she headed for the kitchen in her new house. Why had she moved here? It was so dumb, and she hated everyone because she had to move house. Oh, woe is Max. Suddenly, there came a knock at the door.

"Nudge! Get the door! And for the love of god get that orange peel out of your mouth! And speak English, noob!" Max screamed. Nudge called her a -bleep- in Portuguese and answered the door.

"Hello, welcome to the Ride household, how may I help you?" she asked politely. Max stared past her obnoxious little sister and saw the people assembled to presumably welcome her to their stupid little neighbourhood. There were two little blonde kids with blue eyes, a kid with really milky blue eyes and strawberry blonde hair, and a random dark haired and eyed boy who was gaping at her. Max scowled at him with CONTEMPT.

"Hey." The blind kid nodded.

"Hey." The blonde kids chorused together.

"Hey." The dark haired kid added. "We're here to welcome you, and stuff."

"That's so cool! Hi, I'm Nudge! That's my sister, Max, but she's a beeeyotch and I hate her 'cause she's like, so MEAN and stuff! Like, yeah, like. You know what I mean, like?" Nudge squealed.

"Like, yeah!" the little blonde girl replied. "Totally!" Max rolled her eyes. They were totally, like, annoying. Like. She turned around and suddenly the dark haired boy was right in front of her.

"Self-defence!" Max screamed, punching him and sprinting up the stairs.

"What a weird girl..." the dark haired boy (who shall be called Fang, because the author couldn't be bothered to keep writing 'dark haired boy' every time he spoke) said.

"What an ass." The blonde haired boy (Gasman, for the same reasons as above) agreed. Fang stared after her, wondering how someone so delicate and beautiful and wonderful and perfect could be such a badass. And so, he followed her. Because Fang had no regard for personal space or anything like that.

"HEY!" he cried, knocking down her door. Max squealed.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" she screamed.

"DO YOU WANT TO IRREVECOBLY FALL IN LOVE, BUT NEVER ADMIT IT, EVEN THOUGH I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND THAT I HAVE CONVENIENTLY FORGOTTEN FOR THE MOMENT!?" Fang asked. Max considered this.

"But... but I'm badass!" she protested weakly. Fang moved forward.

"I see past that exterior," he said wisely, even though he had only known her for literally less than two minutes, "I see the beautiful girl hiding inside. You just need to trust me." Max closed her eyes. She knew it was true- she loved this boy, although he apparently had a girlfriend and she had no idea what his name was.

"I thought we weren't admitting our feelings for each other until later chapters? I thought we were supposed to become friends after I first hate you and then maybe develop feelings for you, but you get a girlfriend and I go emo and start writing depressing poetry and listen to emo music and stuff?" Max asked in confusion. Fang shrugged.

"Well, the author of this story got bored with that, so she's randomly decided to make two strangers fall in love with each other. I'm Fang, by the way." He smiled.

"Max." Max said, all of her badass-ness melting away. Fang was like a potato peeler, peeling away all of her layers. Except she wasn't a potato.

"What a beautiful name." Fang said, and kissed her. Just then, Lissa/Brigid appeared.

"OMG YOU'RE SUCH A JERK YOU CHEATER!" Lissa/Brigid screeched. Max rolled her eyes and chucked Lissa/Brigid out the window.

"Stupid ranga." (A/N: I don't mean any disrespect to red-headed people. One of my very close friends has red hair, in fact.) Max said, and then went back to kissing Fang.

Meanwhile, Nudge taught Iggy, Gazzy and Angel Portuguese, and they all sat around eating oranges. Everyone had a happy ending, because Max was no longer a stupid psycho badass with emotional problems. Lissa/Brigid died, and Iggy ran away to Canada to become a Mountie, ey. (A/N; Again, no disrespect to Canadians. I mean no disrespect to anyone, kk? Haha)

A/N;

That was stupid, but I'm posting.
Max is not a potato and Nudge has an orange fetish. And Fang's a cheating dork. Iggy wants to become a Mountie. Yep, that's the Flock for you.