Five

It is often one of my favorite hobbies to go to a beach near to where the Baudelaires once lived and to watch as the seashore is lapped away slowly by the oncoming waves endlessly so that every person who ever stepped foot on this sand would be swept away just as assuredly as the last, and nothing would remain the same.

I like to travel to this secluded spot to gather my thoughts, or to write sonnets for a lost love of mine or to await a companion who is supposed to bring me a coded message and to hope they are not late for if they are that can only mean we have been compromised.

But the main reason that I enjoy these long walks on the beach is the very one I have already mentioned; that nothing remains the same there. True there are many things about the seashore that remained unchanged over time, in fact the very thing I just recounted will continue until the end of my life and until your life and until the end of all our lives and on into eternity, but the fact still remains that all those who walked across the beach, be they a dismal and supposedly deceased author or an eager young bachelor seeking to woo the hand of a famous actress or perhaps even the brother of a dastardly villain headed to court to proclaim the truth but being apprehended shortly beforehand because of a case of mistaken identity, their imprint on this sandy shore will never remain and thus nothing would remain the same.

The reason I wish to make this point clear, in case you were wondering; is because for the Baudelaire orphans in the story that you are currently reading everything would remain the same throughout it, a phrase which here means "Klaus, Sunny, Violet and Beatrice's lives would not get any better during their working days at the Anxious Clown diner and they would fail once again to stop their adversaries in their vile plot and would only find deeper and darker secrets that provided them with more questions."

And this fact was further compounded by the event that Sunny had just witnessed, when Mister Dominic entered the small café and the two evident enemies stood up and greeted him as if they were all friends, and I suppose in the realm of wickedness that is exactly what they were.

The formerly youngest Baudelaire was still too stunned by this sudden change of events to even approach the table and ask the guests how their meal was going, especially since in the past Mister Dominic had always spotted the Baudelaires like an eagle spots its prey from high above the sky.

Holding the tray above her face again so that she couldn't be seen, Sunny approached the terrible trio and asked mildly, "Is there anything else that I can get for you?" The man with the beard but no hair looked down at her contemptuously and remarked, "This is exactly what I was talking about, Dominic; the service here at the Anxious Clown has really gone downhill ever since we lost the contract!"

"I believe I've told you once already that was not my fault," Mister Dominic replied in an irritated tone and then gazed down at Sunny as well and smirked only slightly.

The disguised orphan nearly lost her balance whenever he did this, and Sunny immediately recognized that now the ball was in the other court, a phrase which here means "It was up to their evil enemy Mister Dominic whether or not he would reveal to the man with the beard but no hair and the woman with hair but no beard that Sunny Baudelaire was standing there eavesdropping" and the no longer infantile orphan waited to see what the enigmatic villain would do."

"I don't think this newest employee is going to harm us, and as for this strange group known as ERT… I assure you that I will handle them," Mister Dominic told his companions, never taking his eyes off of Sunny as he continued to speak. "Don't fail us, Dominic; you know what we do to people who can't live up to their word," the woman with the hair but no beard said venomously, which caused all of Sunny's hair to stand on edge.

Yet apparently, Mister Dominic didn't seem disturbed by these words and countered, "Have I ever failed you in the past, my dear friends?" The man with the beard but no hair was nodding and remarking, "No you haven't recently, I must admit. The disposal of Olaf's troupe was rather fitting considering his own dismal disappointing demise at the hands of the Baudelaire brats."

"Then you can rest assured that I will do everything necessary in order to find it, along with the Baudelaires," the orphan's nemesis said with another smirk toward Sunny, which caused her knees to wobble.

"Are you eavesdropping on our conversation?" the woman with the hair but no beard asked angrily glaring down at the former infant. "I'm sorry ma'am," Sunny stammered, but once again Mister Dominic came to the rescue and remarked, "Let's not forget that this place was filled with our recruits. Anything we have to discuss we can do so openly."

Sunny Baudelaire looked at him curiously, and the two villains who were brunching nodded in understanding until at last the woman with the hair but no beard remarked, "I couldn't help but to notice that the hostess is not one of our minions, so as I have said many times before we must be careful."

The man with the beard but no hair checked his watch and finished his meal before stating, "I suppose we should be moving on. There isn't much time before the banquet and we still have quite a few assignments to take care of."

His companion nodded and laughed before stating, "I'm so glad that idiot Anwhistle is dead, otherwise he would've been here trying to stop us." "Gregor or Ike?" Dominic asked.

"Doesn't matter, all of those connected to the Baudelaires have always been a thorn in our side. Once their little organization is swept away, we'll be able to begin the operation as planned," the man with a beard but no hair stated.

"I assure you that I will continue with our plans as you've instructed me," Mister Dominic said and then added, "Starting with the paying of this tab."

The two villains rose and said their farewells to the orphan's opponent and then left without paying any of the bill whatsoever. It is here that I am glad to say that these two dastardly denizens, these malevolent miscreants, these terrible thieves, these evil enemies, yes this despicable duo will not be bothering the Baudelaires for quite some time; but rather will return to other wicked activities so since they have now left, you can breathe again. Mister Dominic watched as his companions left, sipping his iced lemonade with the ice cubes that Violet had made and then turning toward Sunny Baudelaire and remarking, "Well that was rather interesting, wasn't it?"

He winked, placed the money necessary for the bill onto the table; including a tip for Sunny and stated, "Take care of yourself." Without another word, the ever mysterious Mister Dominic left the Anxious Clown and the former toddler quickly gathered the money and returned to the kitchen, where her siblings were waiting to hear about this unexpected turn of events.

Klaus and Violet and Beatrice all stood rigid as their sister entered thru the flipping double doors, for all three of her siblings had also seen Mister Dominic arrive and just as quickly depart, which of the two occurrences the Baudelaires were more thankful for the latter even though they knew that Mister Dominic was sure to return and very soon.

So the children recognized that they had little time left to figure out what was going on and they also knew they had many mysteries which needed to be solved and they weren't sure which to tackle first.

Violet was wondering whether or not Sally Sebald was a villain or a volunteer and if there was any way for them to find out whereas Klaus was considering what connection Mister Dominic might have to the two wicked villains who had just left the Anxious Clown diner and Sunny was thinking about where Falo was at and Beatrice was wondering whether or not she would ever get a decent meal as she ate some of the leftovers from the soup. Sadly, the four orphans didn't know which of these problems mattered more, since if they found Falo they could relate to him all of these concerns, but they also recognized that their current guardian could be forgetful more often than not, so perhaps sharing with him the discoveries they'd made would not be beneficial at all.

And if they wanted to find out whether or not Sally Sebald was a volunteer would be even more difficult since she apparently had some knowledge of these wicked people and why they were there. So the Baudelaires couldn't ask her the vital questions they needed to have answered if the young woman turned out to be a villain. And they had no earthly idea where Mister Dominic was headed to or why he had chosen not to reveal their presence to the two wicked judges.

So since they had no idea where to begin, the children spent the rest of the afternoon busing tables, each anxious by the developments they'd witnessed at the Anxious Clown.

The word anxious, if you were wondering, is a word that denotes you are troubled or stressed about a current situation because matters seem to be getting no better whatsoever and you have no idea what the outcome might be.

For example, if you were invited to a dinner party and at that party you were aware of a notorious villain being there in his attempt for vengeance against a young lady you were fond of than you would be quite anxious to arrive as soon as possible disguised as well so that you could warn her before the entire estate goes up in flames. So being anxious in this instance meant your concern for the person who would be at the party and was at risk from the dangerous person who was seeking to do her harm and I must admit, had I not been so anxious; perhaps the authorities wouldn't have mistaken my cries for help.

But even though this was the case do to the anxieties I expressed some good did come from it, albeit for a short period of time due to Olaf finding you and destroying you and everything you cared about, my fair Beatrice. For the Baudelaire orphans, the matter was much the same, for they knew that a dangerous and deadly villain was close by and if they didn't act soon yet another location would be burnt to the ground by Mister Dominic and his wickedness.

So as they did their assignments, Beatrice, Klaus, Sunny and Violet all were so anxious about these events that they didn't properly tend to the customers. Violet forgot entirely about the assignment Sally Sebald had given her to fix the ice machine and Sunny burnt four orders despite her being an excellent cook and Klaus got six orders wrong despite his excellent memory and even Beatrice wasn't able to take a nap because of the trouble that she and her siblings faced, which is saying quite a lot considering that infants sleep a great deal.

So when the diner closed at the end of the day and their hostess approached them in the kitchen, she was glaring at the four orphans intently and Sally Sebald asked, "Violet! Why didn't you fix the ice machine so that our customers could have fresh cold drinks?"

And switching her gaze toward Klaus, she wondered, "And how could you have possibly gotten that many orders wrong?"

And looking down at Sunny she inquired, "And why have you burnt all that food?"

Even to Beatrice, she murmured, "And why is your adopted sister so fussy?"

The oldest orphan cradled Beatrice, trying to calm her sister before answering, "I'm sorry, but we have quite a lot of things on our mind." "I hate to say this, Baudelaires; but I'm not really sure you qualify as volunteers," Sally Sebald remarked and then turned to Klaus and asked, "Did my brother give you the message?"

The middle orphan looked at the young blonde woman in confusion and remarked, "I didn't see your brother here today, and even if I did; I wouldn't know because I have never met him before."

Sally looked at Klaus like this was the most ridiculous thing she had ever heard and replied, "How disappointing, Klaus; I was sure that Gustav would stop by some time today and tell you that he needed help."

"My brother pointed out that we don't know any of your family," Sunny remarked. "That's no excuse, Sunny. There are some things that members of V.F.D. should clearly know," Sally Sebald answered, although none of the orphans knew what she meant. The young blonde crossed her arms in front of herself and remarked, "I think it is becoming increasingly clear that you children aren't who you say you are." "But we've told you that we are Violet, Klaus, Sunny and Beatrice!"

the middle orphan remarked. "I know you did, but I've seen no evidence to suggest that you are who you say you are," Sally Sebald replied and then leaned down and asked in almost a whisper, "Do you know who I am?"

Klaus, Beatrice, Violet and Sunny looked at each other and then the oldest Baudelaire replied uncertainly, "Sally Sebald?"

"I'm sorry, Violet; but that's not what I meant," she said with a sigh and then stated, "We should close down the Anxious Clown diner now." As she walked off, the children looked at each other in confusion and then walked back into the kitchen and began to clean up.

After about half an hour of doing this, there was a soft sound from the left wall and the four orphans turned to see what it was; but saw nothing there but a wall. Again, there a noise; this time slightly louder and Klaus remarked, "I think there is a noise coming from the other side of this wall."

His sisters paused what they were doing and stared at the wall and this time heard a slightly louder thumping noise, and Violet replied, "I think Klaus is right." "But there is just a wall there," Sunny stated.

"I think from our time at the Ned H. Rirger Theater we learned that sometimes there are secret walls, and this location was used by V.F.D. at one time as a safe place… maybe there is a secret wall here?" the eldest Baudelaire suggested and stopped from washing the dishes to examine the wall. Klaus and Sunny and Beatrice stopped the chores they were performing and joined their sister in looking for some secret cache to the wall, and Klaus looked up and saw that there was a small shelf above them, where some of the pots and pans sat that only adults could reach, and one was slightly ajar where that it was leaning down as if to fall; and yet it didn't.

As Klaus peered up at this peculiar pot, Violet turned to him and asked, "Klaus, why are you just standing there? Help us figure out how to open this secret passage."

"I was looking at that pot that is out of place… it should fall to the floor, but it hasn't yet. I believe it is a lever of some kind," the middle orphan answered. "Grajaka," Beatrice replied which probably meant "Klaus! Stop wasting your time looking up and help us!" or perhaps "Even if that was a lever, we're not tall enough to reach it."

"Maybe if you stand on my shoulders?" Violet suggested, knowing that when her brother had a feeling about certain things; it was best to act upon it. The two younger children stood out of the way so that Klaus could do as his older sister suggested and carefully balanced himself on top of Violet's shoulders and pulled on the pot that was out of place.

Immediately, the wall slid to the left in front of them and the four children gaped in surprise to see their current guardian standing on the other side in the secret room. "Thank goodness you heard me, Baudelaires! I thought I would suffocate in there," Falo said as he combed his hair back and shivered involuntarily. "What were you doing back there?" Klaus asked as he peered into the room behind Falo and the middle Baudelaire felt like a tornado had swept thru the chamber.

The expression "like a tornado had swept thru it" does not mean that a literal force of nature had ripped thru the small room that Falo was standing in it, for if it had then the entire diner that the Baudelaires were now working in would also be gone as well.

But rather this phrase means that the room was so messy and cluttered that Klaus felt like if there had been such a force moving thru the area, it would account for the pots and the pans that were on the floor, the napkins that appeared to be strewn every which way, the brooms and the mops and the cleaning supplies that were either leaking or were carelessly pushed aside, the baskets and the tablecloths that were in piles on the cracked tile floor, the utensils and knives that were dangerously out of place, the soap and water that dripped from the wall as if it had been tossed out of the way or the dishes and cups that were either disorganized or broken in every corner of the room

. "I know this place probably looks like a tornado went thru it," Falo said, as if he read Klaus' thoughts and then remarked, "But I was searching for it in there because I know that if he brought it here… this is where he would've placed it."

"Brought what where?" Violet asked. "Who brought what?" Sunny wondered.

"Who placed what?" Klaus muttered. Falo chuckled as he stepped out of the small cluttered room and the wall slid back and he explained, "That is what happened whenever I went inside, so I figured I would search for it while I waited for someone to come to my rescue… and now that I know it isn't there, I'm positive it's somewhere else here at the Anxious Clown diner."

"What is?" Violet asked her current guardian. The evil twin of Count Olaf looked at them and then gestured toward a corner.

"Why the very thing that could solve all our problems, children," he whispered and smiled before stating, "The sugar bowl!"

Could a miracle be their next course for the miserable orphans? Don't count on it, but find out soon enough! Read and review please!