VII. The Things that Make a Difference

2 Days before Valentine's Day

.::.

Ziva nearly flew out of her skin when Tony's hand landed on her shoulder, and she jumped out of her chair, causing it to crash into the shelves behind her. "Tony!" She gasped, "When did you come up beside me?"

Tony blinked. "I thought you knew. Wow. I didn't know it was possible to do that to a ninja. Must be all that thinking you've been doing…what were you thinking about anyway?"

"Nothing," Ziva replied firmly, although her heartbeat picked up speed instead of returning to normal. She retrieved her chair and sat down upon it, looking up at him and trying not to betray any emotion. "Did you want to talk to me about something?"

"Yes." He leant down so that he could look right into her eyes, and that didn't help matters at all. "I was wondering if you would spend Valentine's Day with me."

Ziva's lips inadvertently parted. "Yes," she answered breathily, and wondered whether he would mind it very much if she were to lean forward and kiss him again.

"Awesome," he whispered, his breath warming her cheeks. It was a good thing he straightened up just then, or her thought might not have remained hypothetical for much longer. "I'll be at your place tomorrow night then."

"Wait," Ziva said haltingly, trying to snap out of her Tony-induced haze, "Valentine's Day is not tomorrow night."

"Yeah…I was hoping I could go into Valentine's Day with you?" Ziva wasn't sure if that was actually a request or an explanation, but the hopeful-puppy-like expression on his face made her want to laugh.

"Alright," she merely answered, the corners of her mouth twitching.

Tony grinned at her and went back to his own desk. Smiling, Ziva turned back to her computer screen, but as had been before he interrupted her, her thoughts were not occupied by work.

.::.

"We have to go back to your apartment first," he told her as they walked towards their cars.

"Why?" She frowned.

"For you to change into something nicer. We're not going to a place where you can just walk in wearing cargo pants."

She eyed his tailored Italian suit up and down. "Well, I guess you are dressed for the occasion then."

"That's why we're not going back to my apartment." Tony grinned. "C'mon, it won't take more than half an hour. And after that we've leaving your car at your place and taking my car."

"Where are we going, Tony?" Ziva asked as she unlocked her car door.

"You'll see." Tony got into the driver's seat of his car and shut the door, leaving her no chance to ask any other questions. Making a sound of annoyance under her breath, Ziva climbed into her driver's seat too.

.::.

The ringing of her desk phone made Ziva jump for the second time in the day, and she noticed Tony and McGee exchange glances from across the bullpen, as if concerned over her apparent lack of ability to concentrate on work. Biting her lip, she picked up the handset. "David."

"Ziva, have you seen Gibbs?"

"I have not, Abby. I thought he was with you."

"He's not, and he's not answering his phone either."

"I am sure he is fine. He probably just went to get some more coffee."

"Yeah. If you see him, can you please tell him I have something to give him?"

"Of course, Abby." Ziva was about to hang up when Abby spoke again.

"And Ziva?"

"Yes?"

"I'm super-mad at Tony right now, but I'm not mad at you, so I just wanted to congratulate you."

"Because you are not mad at me?" Ziva asked in confusion.

"No," Abby laughed, her voice carrying a hint of barely suppressed excitement, "Because of the kiss!"

Ziva froze, and she was frantically searching her brain for an appropriate reply when Abby hung up. Ziva returned the receiver to its cradle slowly and glanced over at Tony, who was watching her questioningly. She got out of her chair, giving him a significant look as she did so, and walked out of the bullpen; Tony waited a few minutes before leaving the bullpen too and joining her in their favourite conference room – the men's room.

.::.

Soft light illuminated the entire place, glittering off the well-polished windows and the shiny marble surfaces. Ziva looked around the Italian restaurant as a waiter pulled out her chair for her, and she had to wonder why Tony had brought her there. It was an expensive place, and she was worried – money would be tight for her, even with her savings.

Her worry vanished when she felt Tony's hand suddenly reach across the table for her own, and then she was filled with emotions entirely different. He made her skin tingle and her heart warm, but she had to resist the urge to pull her hand away. She didn't know what he meant by it, and wish as she might that he would hold her hand forever, she didn't think it would ever mean as much for him as it did to her right then. Yet somehow she couldn't bring herself to withdraw her hand; she needed the feeling of his skin upon hers for just that moment longer.

He threaded his fingers through hers just then, and she looked up shocked. "What are you doing?" She asked shakily, praying that her face did not betray her beating heart.

He studied her fingers. "I've never noticed how stubby your fingers are," he answered as he held up her hand and rotated it from left to right, and Ziva had to suppress a laugh. She knew he didn't really mean what he'd said; she knew he had said it to put her at ease. And he had succeeded. Because he was Tony DiNozzo, class clown. Because it was he who she loved. And because she now realized that nothing between them had ever been deception; they had been through the good and the bad and almost everything in between, but every single bit of it had been true. Every single bit.

She relaxed into her chair and he put her hand back down, but his fingers were still laced in between hers and she found that she didn't mind it after all.

.::.

Ziva locked the door and turned around. "That was Abby."

"I know," Tony answered her, still looking nonplussed.

Ziva hesitated. "She…congratulated me."

"For what?"

"For kissing you."

Tony gaped at her, and Ziva was pretty sure that it was close to the expression she had been wearing. "She what?"

"How did she find out?" She frowned and ran through the different possibilities in her head.

Tony cleared his throat uncomfortably. "She does have a lot of sources."

The tone in his voice made her look up. "Did you tell her?"

"No!" Tony replied indignantly. "Of course not! Why would I tell Abby?"

"Well there has been word going around the building about some sort of plan…" Ziva said vaguely.

He stared at her. "You know about that?"

Ziva sighed. "Yes."

"How much do you know?"

"I am not exactly sure. There are many versions going around, and some are very strange."

"Why didn't you do anything to mess it up?"

"Well, I was going to, but then I saw you with your nightmares and decided that it must be hard for you-"

"So your staying the night…it was pity?"

"No, Tony." She pressed her hands gently to his chest. "I was really worried about you."

Tony gazed down into her chocolate brown eyes, and she gave him a slight smile. "Okay," he said quietly. He bent down and kissed her. "We're not telling Abby about this one."

"So you admit telling her about the first one?" Ziva whispered against his lips.

"No." He backed away slightly and took her hand. "I didn't tell her, but I'm pretty sure she hacked into another camera."

Ziva made a face. "I hope not. That would be very weird."

"The men's room, however, doesn't have a camera – I checked." Tony grinned.

"Did she chew you up for not telling her about the kiss?" Ziva asked.

"Hey, you got the phrase right!" Tony said in a surprised tone, and Ziva punched him with her free hand. "Ow. Yeah, she chewed me up. After that I came upstairs and asked you to spend Valentine's Day with me."

Ziva threw back her head and laughed. "I see. Come on, we have to go out before Gibbs kills us." She unlocked the door and dragged him out of the men's room, not caring that McGee was gawking at their still linked-together hands as they passed by him.

.::.

They took a walk along the Washington Channel after dinner, and it was peaceful and calming. It wasn't at all like Ziva had imagined having more than a casual dinner with Tony would be. He had treated her like a perfect gentleman should have; paid for her meal, which had surprised her, and helped her into her coat, which had astounded her. It had freaked her out, but he had continued on with his movie quotes and jokes like nothing was different, and that had made her think that maybe there was nothing to be afraid of in the first place. Maybe something more with him didn't mean that anything had to change.

But she still had no idea if there was something more, because there he was, walking beside her, giving her all the right signals and the wrong words. And she was a woman, after all, so just for once she wanted to get to hear him say the right words. His hand was still wrapped around hers and it was making her heart skip a beat every so often, but she had to wonder if it would be the last time; if the Valentine's Day plan rumour was just that – a rumour, and if tomorrow she would have to go back to work and watch him chase the newest agent in skirts and pretend she couldn't still remember how it felt like to have his hand around hers.

"Have you ever wished upon a falling star?" His voice rang clear in the quiet night, and she stopped and stared at him. He was gazing up at the night sky. "I did that once with my mum before she died," he explained without looking down.

"Oh." Ziva paused. It was such an un-Tony-ish thing to say that she didn't quite know how to respond. "What did you wish for?"

"A pet dog. I really wanted one but my dad wasn't too fond of things with fur."

Ziva snorted.

His green eyes met her browns. "I also wished for the chance to find my true love."

.::.

"Gibbs," Ziva called him without looking up from her typing, as she sensed him enter the bullpen, "Abby is looking for you."

"I know. She found me." His disgruntled voice made her glance over at him, and she was taken aback to see him holding the largest bouquet of black roses that she had ever seen before. He laid them down on the table and strode out of the bullpen, and the three remaining agents stared after him as the elevator doors slid shut.

"Why do you think she gave them to him?" McGee asked in wonderment.

"She probably thinks it'll make him feel better about Valentine's Day and his ex-wives," Tony proposed, and McGee frowned in his direction.

"Since when do you know Abby that well?" He asked.

"I've always known Abby that well," Tony retorted.

"I think I'm gonna go find Abby." McGee slipped off his chair and headed towards Abby's lab.

"He's jealous," Tony whispered wickedly to Ziva as they watched McGee's retreating back.

Ziva chuckled. "Should I be too, Tony?"

"Never, tesoro mio."

Ziva narrowed her eyes at him before going back to work. "Do not start with the silly pet names," she warned him. She would never admit that she secretly cherished them. Nor would she ever admit that the blazing intensity of his green eyes had already left her in a pool of melt.

.::.

He said nothing else that night. There was no dramatic declaration of everlasting commitment or exploding fireworks or grand background music, but Ziva understood Tony, and she understood what he was trying to tell her. And she understood how hard it was for him to do it, because it was just as hard for her, and she admired him for his courage. They still acted as normal when they went to work the next day, but she found that she no longer feared him chasing the newest agent in skirts.

They solved the case the day after that; caught the guy who was obsessed with killing every petty officer who reminded him of the man his wife had left him for. It was a case which shook each and every one of them to the core, because they could very clearly see how her leaving had turned his world upside down and practically driven him insane. And it scared them that such a simple act; such a simple leaving, a simple goodbye, could rip open a hole so deep and dark in a person's world that the person could fall inside and never be able to find their way out again. There was no satisfaction in putting him away. There was only an overwhelming sense of sadness.

The case took its toll on all of them, and it was not surprising when Tony asked Ziva if he could hang out at her place. They ordered pizza and watched a rented movie, like they had done together as friends for years, but this time was different because each sought a new kind of solace in the other that they had never before. And it did not surprise her either when he leant over and kissed her.

What did surprise her was how much she liked it. It was tender and loving and it made her head spin, and made her feel as if her whole life finally made sense. As if he was the piece she had been missing, or perhaps he wasn't even that; he was simply the glue that held all the broken pieces of her together, that made her complete, that made her whole. That made her, ultimately, who she was.

.::.

Gibbs let them off work when he came back. Ziva smiled at Tony as he approached her desk. There were no pretences between them now, no walls; just like how it should always have been, except what made the difference now was that they knew it. And it frightened them, but they wouldn't have turned back the clock for the world because doing so would have been like tearing a hole in their own lives. They were in for one hell of a rollercoaster ride, but it was one that they would go on with no other.

"Dinner?" He asked.

"Sure," she answered.

.::.

A/N: Lesson in italiano - Tesoro mio is "my treasure".

My last chapter for this story! There's still Ash's next chapter, of course. Thank you to everyone who read, reviewed, favourited and put out alerts! I hope you liked this chapter, because all the flashbacks actually made it hard to write. Please leave a review! So I won't feel sad and lonely :)

Love,

Soph