Listening to the Rent soundtrack while writing can be very distracting. I don't advise it.

I think it's funny that my story Envy was only six chapters long, but took me exactly one year to finish. Seriously, look at the date published and date updated. One year apart…Exactly. Anyway, I think it's funny that this is the seventh chapter and it took me only a little over two months, and it's nowhere near done, while a six chapter (complete) story took me a year. Weird.

Disclaimer: See earlier chapters.

"I knew they'd agree," Alex said with a smug smile after just receiving the news from Justin that the Torres family would let her sit in on their daughter's homeschooling lessons with Justin. She kicked her feet up on the coffee table and propped her hands behind her head to support its weight.

Jerry was speechless. He was so sure no parent in their right mind would let their child within a mile radius of Alex after they'd heard what she was like.

"You did tell them about her, right?" Jerry asked, finding his voice. "About her flaws?"

"Hey! Aren't fathers supposed to think their daughters are perfect?" Alex frowned at her father.

"I told them that she got kicked out of school for almost burning it to the ground," Justin said, ignoring his sister. "And then later I told Mitchie about how rude and mean she can be. She still seemed to want Alex to tag along. It was Mitchie's idea in the first place. Her parents were on their way to saying no, but Mitchie said she'd like to give it a try since it was a chance to make a friend."

Alex snorted. "Me? Friends with the nerdy version of Juno? Yeah, no thanks."

"Alex, you know nothing about her!" Justin snapped, feeling defensive. He'd spent the entire day with Mitchie and discovered she was actually a pretty great kid. He really liked her. "She's actually insanely cool. She's into all this great music, and she has goals."

"Awe, you like her." Alex smirked and took her hand from behind her head to give her brother's shoulder a shove.

"Not like that." Justin sighed and rolled his eyes. "I don't have feelings for her, but yes, I do like her. And I think you would too if you gave her a chance."

"Is she going to give me one?"

"You're allowed to come tomorrow, aren't you?" Justin gave her a hard look.

Alex opened her mouth to say something, then snapped it shut again. She didn't like this feeling, one of being defeated, even if she'd technically won. She'd gotten her way. Justin was going to teach her and she was safe from going to military school. She just didn't like the fact that her fate ended up being in the hands of someone her own age. And now since this girl had saved her from structure and rules, she was going to have to be nice? How could she possibly do that? She wasn't even really nice to Harper, and she was her best friend!

"Alex, you better listen to Justin!" Jerry pointed his finger in his daughter's face. "I mean it. Do whatever he tells you. And your mother and I will be personally getting your assignments from Justin and checking to make sure you've done them."

"Yeah, yeah." Alex dismissed her father with a wave of her hand.

"We're serious, young lady," her mother said sternly. "No more disappointments."

"So this would be a bad time to tell you I'm gay, right?" Alex said without really thinking.

"What?" Jerry yelled, his eyes almost bugging out of his head.

Alex looked at her father and took note of the expression on his face, then to her brother and mother. They held equal expressions of shock. She went back and replayed her little announcement in her head.

"Oh, crap, did I say that out loud?" She put her hand over her mouth.

Her family nodded at her.

"Tell me you're joking," Theresa said, almost robotically. There was no color in her face and she felt numb.

Alex removed her hand. "I would, but I'd be lying," she said quietly. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to tell you this way. That just kind of slipped out."

"No." Mrs. Russo shook her head. "You can't be a…a…lesbian. You dated Dean."

Alex nodded. "Yeah, to get to his sister. I'd go over there and tell Dean I was going to the bathroom, but really I'd go in Nikki's room and make out with her for ten minutes. Dean just thought I had a huge bladder. I mean, let's face it, the boy wasn't that bright."

"Dean didn't have a sister," Justin said. "She would have gone to school with us. I would know her."

"What makes you think she would go to our school?" Alex asked.

"His family isn't exactly the richest." Justin said in his know-it-all tone. "They couldn't have afforded to send her to a private school, unless she went to military school. And I can't see you being interested in anyone that goes there."

"I never said she was my age, or even your age!" Alex leaned back on the couch, spreading her arms out over the back.

"She was younger than you?" Jerry's face started turning red. "Alex, seducing and corrupting an innocent child is just plain wrong! And illegal!"

"She wasn't younger than me! And plus, if I'm a minor too, it's not illegal!" Alex yelled, very frustrated. "She was older than me, older than Justin. She was in college, for crying out loud!"

"That's illegal, too!" Justin pointed a finger at his sister.

"It's not like I slept with her or anything!" Alex exclaimed.

"Alex! I don't need to hear this!" Jerry clamped his hands over his ears.

"What about Mason?" Theresa asked. "You loved him. He gave you that charm that glowed when you put it on."

"Oh yeah, about that." Alex sighed. "I looked up that necklace on the wiznet. Turns out, Mason lied. It was a fake. There are necklaces that light up when you put them on and you love the person that gave them to you, but this wasn't one of them. It was some cheap trinket he picked up in a junk shop. It would have lit up even if Justin had given it to me."

"Okay, ew." Justin made a face.

"So why did you date him in the first place if you knew you liked…girls?" Theresa pressed. She was having a really hard time believing Alex was actually gay. But that was mostly because she just didn't want to. She knew how hard her daughter's life would be if she was. All the ridicule she'd most probably go through. She didn't want that for her little girl, for any of her children.

"Two reasons. One, I have a thing for British accents. Don't know what it is." Alex paused, shrugging a little. "And two, he was a good cover up."

"Alex, why didn't you just tell us?" Theresa asked quietly.

"Because I knew you'd act like this," she answered. "You don't get it. You don't understand."

"No, we don't," Jerry agreed. He had finally taken his hands off his ears.

"I think you're just confused, honey," Theresa said, reaching out and taking Alex's hand. "Lots of people your age go through this."

"I'm not confused, Mom." Alex pulled her hand away. "I know."

"Alex, you don't even know yourself." Theresa shook her head. "You're too young to know that. You're just going through a phase, a phase you'll grow out of."

"No, Mom, I won't!" Alex yelled, standing up. She was so angry she was shaking. "I'm not confused. I do know. I'm not too young. I've known since I was six years old! When every other girl wanted Barbie dolls, I wanted to tear them apart! When all the girls started getting crushes on all these guys that were just 'so cute' I just went along with it like I understood! But I didn't! I never did, I never do, and I never will! To this day, I still don't get it when I hear girls talking about how hot Robert Pattinson's jaw line or chest hair is. I don't see the thing with the jaw line and chest hair is just gross!"

"Just because you're not attracted to chest hair doesn't mean you're not attracted to guys," Theresa said.

"Ugh, Mom! You're not listening!" She clenched and unclenched her fists, trying to calm down. "I don't like guys! Okay?"

Her mother shook her head. "I just don't believe you."

"Fine." Alex sighed heavily, tears pricking her eyes. This hurt. "You be in denial all you want. I'll be in my room."

Without another word, she turned and slowly made her way to the stairs. Her heart grew heavier with each step she took up the spiral staircase. When she finally got to her room, it felt like it was in the pit of her stomach.

In her room, she dove onto her bed, immediately burying her face in her pillow as hot tears started to roll down her face. She'd always imagined coming out to her family, but she never thought it would hurt that much, be that hard. She hadn't meant to say it, it just slipped out. She still had no idea what compelled her to actually do it. For a brief moment, it felt good having it out in the open. But then her family had to open their mouths and ruin everything. Had it really been an accident, or had she meant to come out? She didn't know.

Being gay was always something she had trouble accepting about herself. When she was little, it scared the crap out of her. She was always troubled that she didn't look at boys the way the other girls in her class seemed to. She always saw them as kind of gross. Sure, every girl went through the 'boys are icky' phase, but they grew out of it around the age of nine. Alex, on the other hand, never grew out of it. Of course, she didn't know why.

Then came the day when she found out what 'gay' meant. Justin had come home crying because some older kids at school called him a fag.

"What's a fag?" ten-year-old Alex asked twelve-year-old Justin as he sat on the couch, tears still running down his face.

"It's a hateful term used for gay boys," Theresa said from the kitchen. She was busy making hot chocolate for Justin to cheer him up.

"What's gay?" Alex asked. If these were insults, she wanted to know so she could use them on her brother. If they made Justin cry, they had to be good.

"It means I like boys." Justin said, sniffling a little.

"Like, like-like?"seven-year-old Max asked, looking up from the cartoon that had been holding his attention until that moment. He stuffed a peanut M&M into his mouth while waiting for an answer.

"Yes, Max." Justin wiped his eyes on his jacket sleeve.

"You like-like boys?" Alex exclaimed. She'd never heard anything like this before. It intrigued her.

"No!" Justin growled. "Shut up!" He punched his little sister on the arm before running off towards the wizard lair, fresh tears in his eyes.

"Justin!" Theresa called after him, but it was no use. He was already in the lair.

"I don't get it," Alex said, staring after her brother and rubbing her shoulder. Justin's punched hadn't hurt, but shocked her. He'd never once hit her until then. "Why would it be so bad if Justin liked boys?"

"Because, some people don't like it when boys like boys and girls like girls," Theresa said, handing Alex the cup of hot chocolate that was meant for Justin. "They get made fun of if they do."

"Girls can like-like other girls, too?" Alex asked, staring into the mug thoughtfully.

"Sometimes." Theresa nodded.

"Would it be bad if Justin like-liked boys, Mom?" Alex looked up at her mother with those big brown eyes.

"Of course not, Sweetie." Mrs. Torres smoothed her daughter's hair. "Daddy and I would love him just the same. Nothing could make us stop loving any one of you kids. Nothing."

"Mom, I can't breathe," Max said, tapping his mother on the shoulder.

Theresa turned to her youngest child to see that while she'd been talking to Alex, Max had decided to shove a few of his M&Ms up his nose.

"Like I said, nothing," Theresa said dully to Alex before standing up, taking Max by the hand, and leading him to the kitchen. "Max, are you going to do that every time we give you those things?"

Usually Alex loved watching her mom use the tongs to remove candy from her younger brother's nose, but today she was too preoccupied. Girls could like-like other girls? She had never known that before. But that could explain a lot of things. Like why she was the only girl in her class that didn't have a crush on Brad Butler, a boy with blonde hair and blue eyes that were said to sparkle like sun on a clear blue ocean. She didn't get it. To her, he was just another smelly boy that thought too much of himself. So maybe she like-liked girls. The thought didn't seem too bad to her.

But then she remembered that her mother said sometimes girls that like girls and boys that like boys get picked on for doing so. And it must be bad if being accused of being this gay thing made Justin come home crying.

No, she couldn't like-like girls. She'd be the only one in her class, and she didn't want to be left out. So she would just like-like boys, like every other girl.

Alex had forgotten all about that day until she got to high school. That's when things really started changing. Other girls in her grade started getting serious boyfriends. And that's also when Harper started obsessing over Justin. Then the talk of jaw lines came in. Seriously, how did a jaw line make someone hot?

Alex just didn't see it. So, she would just wait until someone mentioned that a guy was cute, then take an interest in him. That's what she did with Riley, anyway. But that didn't work out. There was no chemistry. And then there was Dean. She first took interest in him when she saw him in detention. They had a conversation about all the trouble they liked to cause. She enjoyed talking to him. And he made her laugh.

According to every conversation she heard about guys that other girls liked, that meant she liked him and should date him. But she didn't feel that spark that she heard about so often. She knew from what the other girls said about him that he was one of the most beautiful boys to walk the halls of their stupid school, but she couldn't see it herself.

What really freaked her out was while every other girl had pictures of that terrible pop band Connect 3 in their lockers, she only had pictures of Paramore's lead singer Hayley Williams. She realized she was obsessing over Hayley just like all those girls were obsessing over Sheldon, or whatever the hell that guy's name was that sang lead vocals for the lame band. Whenever she watched Paramore music videos, she was transfixed on Hayley. She looked up her pictures on the internet just for fun and smiled every time she saw the red-head.

When she realized what she was feeling for the singer was attraction, she told herself that she was the only girl. And it was just because she admired her so much. No other reason.

As a desperate attempt to keep herself 'normal,' she pursued Dean. He was a good distraction for a while. That is, until she went over to his apartment to watch a movie.

"Alex, this is my sister, Nikki," Dean said, gesturing towards the doorway.

Alex tore her eyes from the movie she and Dean had been watching to look over in the direction Dean was gesturing. When her eyes landed on Nikki, her breathing stopped. Nikki had curly black hair, just like her brother's, but hers was much longer. It fell past her shoulders in ringlets. She was wearing a white tank top, showing off her tan shoulders, and short blue jean shorts, accentuating her long legs. Dark brown eyes twinkled at Alex as Nikki fixed her with a smirk.

"What, cat got your tongue, kid?" Nikki asked amusedly.

"H-hi," Alex said, her mouth feeling dry. She'd never found it so hard to talk around anyone before. Then again, she'd never seen someone that beautiful before, either. "Nice to meet you," she managed to say after swallowing.

Nikki smirked again. "You too, kid." She turned and started off down the apartment's narrow hallway.

Alex's eyes followed the girl, glued to her ass. As Nikki got further down the hall, Alex had to lean forward and crane her neck out so she could keep it in sight.

"I think she liked you," Dean said, startling Alex. She'd forgotten he even existed.

"Hmm?" Alex cleared her throat, pretending to be interested in the TV again. "Oh, yeah. She's…nice." She was having trouble getting her breathing under control.

Dean put his arm around her and pulled her closer to him. Alex leaned into him, somewhat resting her head on his chest. She noticed that his heart wasn't going nearly as fast as hers was. But her increased heart rate had nothing to do with the boy that was sitting so close to her. It had everything to do with his sister, who was just down the hall.

A soft knock on her door was followed by Justin's voice calling, "Alex?" softly through the doorway.

"Go away!" She yelled, her voice muffled by her pillow.

Her bedroom door opened and Justin entered cautiously. "Want to talk about it?"

"No!" Alex sat up and fixed her brother with a teary glare. "God, you're so smart, yet you don't understand shit! I said go away. That means leave me the fuck alone!"

"Well, I'm not going to do that." Justin closed the door and stood there, arms crossed over his chest.

Alex groaned, not in the mood to fight. "What do you want, Justin?"

"I want to know why you never told me you liked girls," he said, sounding hurt.

"Why would I?" Alex exclaimed. "You and I aren't exactly close, you know!"

"We have our moments," Justin said quietly.

"Yeah, once every year or so." Alex wiped her eyes. "Look, I'm sorry, okay? I haven't even told Harper. I hadn't told anyone. I don't even know why I said something today. I guess I just kept it bottled up so long that it had to come out. I had to come out."

"And you're sure?" Justin asked.

"Yeah, Justin, I'm sure, alright?" Alex sighed. "Could you please leave now? I really want to be alone."

"Okay," he said, putting his hand on the doorknob. "I just want you to know I love you, Alex. And I don't look at you differently."

"Thanks, Justin," Alex said, a small smile making its way to her lips. Even if she and Justin had their differences, they had an undeniable bond. They made each other miserable, but they would kill for each other any day, also. And Justin had said just what Alex needed to hear at that moment.

When Justin opened the door, Jerry and Theresa were standing in the doorway.

"We'd like to talk to Alex alone, please," Theresa said solemnly.

"I was just leaving," Justin said before ducking out of the doorway and dashing down the hall to his room.

Alex sighed in frustration when she saw her parents standing in her doorway. "Look, I know what you're going to say. More of that I don't know who I am or what I'm attracted to crap. Well, save it. I know. I've been knowing. I'm sorry you had to find out that way, but I'm glad you know. I'm sick of hiding it from you. I'm not going to do it anymore. It makes me miserable. I didn't choose it. I can't be changed. This is how I am, how I was born. You guys didn't do anything wrong and no one corrupted me. This is me. Either deal with it, or don't. But I love you guys. And I'd kind of like to have your support right now, because you have no idea what I'm going through and have been going through my whole life. It really is a living hell, this gay thing. I'm not asking you to understand or accept this right away, but I am asking that you at least try. Can you do that? Please?"

Her parents looked at each other for a few moments before looking back at their daughter.

"Okay, Alex," Jerry said softly. "We'll try."

"And we love you," Theresa said. "You know that, right?"

"Yeah, I know," Alex said, her voice catching in her throat a bit. She hated getting choked up like this. "Can Harper come over? I'd like to tell her, too…"

"Sure." Theresa nodded. "But she can't stay too late. You both have school tomorrow."

"Okay."

Jerry and Theresa both offered their daughter a small smile before exiting her room, closing her door behind them. They'd had a talk after Alex had gone upstairs. They were shocked, yes, but they'd discussed this before. The topic had come up that day Justin came home from school crying because he was called a fag. If any of their children ever came to them questioning their sexuality, they would try to be as loving and supportive as possible. But they never thought it would be Alex. In all honesty, they thought it would be Justin.

"Hey, Justin?" Alex called through the wall, too lazy to get out of bed and go down the hall to talk to him.

"Yeah, Alex?" he responded.

"What time do I have to be ready to leave tomorrow morning?"

"Eight-thirty!"

"Thank you!" Alex called before grabbing her phone off her nightstand and dialing Harper's number.

"Okay, so what's so important that I had to come all the way over here before I finished my homework?" Harper asked about a half hour later, taking a seat on Alex's bed.

Alex was busy smiling at Harper's ridiculous outfit. She'd worn the one with stuffed animal cats sewn all over it.

"So, how was school?" Alex asked, avoiding the subject.

"Not the same without you," Harper said. "I can't believe you got expelled!"

"Tell me about it," Alex groaned. "Now Justin has to home school me!"

"You get to spend all day with Justin?" Harper's eyes lit up. "Maybe I should have stayed with you in the bathroom and gotten in trouble."

"Yeah, about that…" Alex frowned. "How could you do that to me? I could have died in there!"

"I'm sorry," Harper said. "But you didn't."

"I still could have!"

"Yeah, well…" Harper trailed off, not knowing how to defend herself. "Why did you call me over?"

Alex sighed. "You love me, right Harper?"

"Of course I do. You're my best friend." Harper chuckled a little. She wasn't used to seeing Alex look so vulnerable. It was kind of funny.

"No matter what?"

The red-head nodded. "No matter what. So what's up?"

Alex looked her best friend right in the eye and said, "I'm gay, Harper."

"I know," Harper said without even batting an eyelash.

"You know?" Alex's jaw dropped in disbelief.

"I've known for years, Alex." Harper smiled. "I've just been waiting for you to tell me yourself."

"But…What…How?"

"Let's see, your lack of interest in guys was always a big tip off," Harper said. "That phase you went through when you were obsessed with Hayley Williams." Harper pointed to one of her friend's Paramore posters as Alex's cheeks turned a shade of pink. "And not to mention, when we were little and we played house, you always wanted to be the dad." Harper shrugged. "The signs were there, Alex. They were plain to see. For me, anyway. But I'm your best friend, after all. I know you better than anyone."

"So I take it you're okay with it, then?" Alex asked, feeling a sense of relief.

"Duh!" Harper laughed. "Alex, if the wizard thing didn't scare me off, nothing could."

"Great," she said. "And you do know that I have no feelings for you whatsoever, right?"

"Oh, yeah, definitely!" Harper nodded.

"Good," Alex said. "I love you, Harper, but I could never be in love with you. You're like a sister to me."

"As you are to me." Harper paused. "Speaking of siblings…I wonder what Justin's up to." The girl stood up and went over to the door, opening it.

Alex didn't have to follow her out of the room to know that Harper was going to invade Justin's privacy yet again. When she heard his door open, followed by his surprised squeal, she laughed to herself and fell backwards onto her bed. She felt light and happy. She felt free. And damn, did it feel good.

I know, I know. You're anxious for them to meet. But hey, good things come to those that wait. This chapter did not go at all how I planned, but I am very pleased with how it came out…And how Alex came out ;) That was something really big that needed to be gotten out of the way.

Who has the sexiest avatar ever for her profile? This girl! Check it out (If it's changed. It's supposed to be a Demena one. Might still be my old Liley one though, if it has yet to change).

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