Author: Alliegirl4life

Title: I've Lost My Smile-Part 16

Warnings: Slash and strong language.

Characters: Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels and many others mentioned.

Pairing: Bret/Shawn

Disclaimer: You know the deal-I don't own anything except for the idea for this story-that is all.

Notes for Chapter: I sincerely apologize for the long wait, my computer crashed, so it's taking me a while to post new chapters. Thanks to all who have read and reviewed so far, though. You guys rock!

Hope this chapter does not disappoint.

Part 16 of I've Lost My Smile:

Bret's POV:

What am I doing? Just a few minutes ago, I was arguing with Shawn Michaels; and now here I am sitting on the bed, making out with him. What the hell is wrong with me? I can't be doing this. I've already made this mistake once before and I can't make it again. However, as I break free from his kiss, I find myself unable to say what I am actually thinking. Instead, I simply sit there and stare at him as he gives me a confused look.

"What's wrong?" He asks me in a hushed tone. I try to answer, but the words refuse to come out. If only I can stand up, grab my bags, and leave! "Bret?" Although, as soon as I try to say something, I discover that I am at a loss for words. All I am able to do is stare straight into his eyes as he continues to say my name. "Bret."

Why is it so hard for me to tell him what I am really thinking? Why? All I have to do is to say the word, "No!" and I am out of here; but no, my willpower completely disappears right when I need it the most; and to think that just a few minutes before I was willing to completely surrender to him.

"Bret!" Snapping back to attention, I finally give him a response.

"What?" What? Is that ALL I can say for myself? I can't simply tell him that I don't trust him anymore? Do you blame me? Look at what he tried to do to me! Yet here I am sitting in complete silence. Damn it.

"What's wrong?" What to say…What to say!

"I, I don't know…" I suddenly glance down at the floor and spot the dozen roses scattered amongst the carpeting. Is that what caused me to completely forgive him? Or was it something else? I know I still care about him, but I don't want to get hurt anymore. Though for whatever reason, I can't seem to tell him that, but why?

"You don't know," Shawn says, disrupting my train-of-thought, "then why'd you stop?" Freeing myself from his embrace, I am finally able to say something to the effect of how I actually feel.

"Shawn," I hesitantly say, "I know I said that I forgive you, but I need you to understand something…" Before I'm able to continue, however, Shawn blurts out exactly what I am trying to say.

"You don't trust me, do you?"

"Shawn, it's just that I don't want to…"

"…To get hurt?"

"Yea…" I look up at him, and the look in his eyes makes me wish I could have told him otherwise. That I should have told him a lie instead; but that's what I've been doing for years now: lying to my co-workers by telling them that I hated Shawn. I can't do that anymore. And I can't keep lying to myself, either.

"But Shawn, I really do care about you…A lot; it's just that…"

"You're afraid that I'm going to hurt you, right?" Damn it! Does he have to know me so well? "Bret, why do you think I came back? I wouldn't have done that if I didn't really care about you." Thinking fast, I finally ask him the question that I have wanted answered since the very beginning.

"Do you?" Without hesitation, he looks at me and smiles.

"What do you think?" Having heard him tell me this, I decide to let myself go for once and before I know it, I'm laying on the bed with him directly on top of me. He then proceeds to unfasten my belt buckle and undo my jeans, slowly removing them and letting them fall to the floor. Although this isn't necessarily what I expected would happen, I find that I simply cannot hold back my feelings for him any longer. I can't keep pretending that what had happened the other night was only an "accident," as some people would say. I really do care about him and I'll be damned if anybody or anything is going to get in between the two of us. Though as I remove his jeans, I suddenly notice the bandage that is wrapped around his knee and realize that our time together may be limited.

I just hope that I'm wrong.

To Be Continued?

A/N: Want me to continue with this story? Just let me know by sending me a review, thanks!