Thanks Simone Robinson for betaing for me!

Chapter one

Raphael felt the subtle twitch in his left hand telling him it was time to wake up. It was difficult, Raphael unconsciously knew, to pull oneself into a world where pain made everything foggy and dull and hurt…

He opened his amber eyes to stare at the area where his brother, Leonardo, should have been. In his absence were his gear, bandana, swords, and blood. His eyes slowly grew before his breathing hitched. Raph didn't know what to think, but he hoped in his mind that this was all a lie built in his brain.

"Raph?" Don called out. "Raph, are you awake?" Don's voice was scared, weak, and unsure.

"Yeah…" Raph felt the tale tell hints that his throat was in desperate need of water. "Leo?"

Don didn't respond right away as he hiccupped up a bit before, "They took him."

Raph felt his blood freeze and his body punched with adrenaline as he smashed his hand, smearing blood, repeatedly against the case hoarsely shouting, "Damn it." Over and over until his voice no longer worked.

"Raph!" Don called out trying to stop his older brother, "You're… Stop…" Raph heard Don begin to cry, who knows when he had last stopped, and he weakly turned his head to see his brother.

"When… when did they bring that in?" he wanted to know, he had to know… how long was he out for…

"About a day ago…" Raph turned to inspect the blood that was not drying or changing. They did use the same chemical that they used for him. "Raph… what… what's going on?" Raphael turned to look at Don before he gave a small comforting smile.

"It's a long… long ass story… Don." Raph felt his breathing becoming labored at the adrenaline began to fade. "It's been… oh shit… I can't believe it's been that long…" Raph felt his body tighten up when he looked at Don's face.

"How… long?" Don was hesitant as he watched Raph laugh before cough and return to laughing.

"Four months yesterday." Don froze and he turned to look up at the ceiling and then the frown, that calculating frown, crept onto that face. Raph was almost ecstatic at the fact that Don understood before he watched denial spread also.

"That's impossible!" Don turned to look at him, "How could that be, Raph, we've … I would have… You're lying!"

Raph growled at being called a liar by his brother, who shrunk back, before Raph pointed, with trembling weak hands, at Don, "I ain't lying, Don, those bastards have been holding us here for FOUR damn months… and you three… oh god, I was scared you guys were dead…" Don blinked as fear etched onto Raph's face.

"What… happened?" he didn't want to know but he had to have the facts, the straight facts that Raph never withdrew if it involved life or death… at times.

"It was Casey's birthday. I dragged you guys there and… got you all drunk." Raph sheepishly looked down, "Sorry…"

"Don't apologies, doofus."

"Whatev'." Raph took a breath to calm his nerves, "After I noticed that neither you, Mikey, nor Leo could actually do anythin' Casey and I thought it would be a good idea if we went home… in his car… damn, shouldn't have let Casey drive…"

"Why?" Don thought of the deadliest accidents that could have happened.

"You three were in the back, passed out, and Casey and I were in the front talking… Casey was asking if he should propose to April, he actually BOUGHT a diamond ring for her… damn, you should have seen how big it was!" Raph's eyes glazed over as he remembered more of that night that haunted his dreams.

"Raph?" Don felt trapped more as Raph continued to speak, his voice going monotone, though as weak and small as it was.

"He was asking… If, after I sobered you three up, we could help him… I knew you guys would say yes, so I told him that… and… Damn bastard had to wake up screaming bloody murder!" Raph slammed his fist into the wall before chuckling, "Mikey had a damn nightmare about booze trying to eat his pizza. Never giving him any more booze until I'm dead and fertilizer." Don realized that Raphael was no longer conscious of this world as he spoke, making Donatello wonder more of what had happened.

"Casey swirled, stupid winter cold and ice and snow and shit, and barely missed the care in front of us." Raph took a breath before he closed his eyes. "The person in the front… how the hell could we have missed what was so visible? WHY THE SHELL didn't we see those damn symbols? Why, Don, did I have to get as smashed as you guys?" Don didn't have an answer as he watched his brother mentally berating himself.

"Huh, guess I'm just too stupid… can't even realize what would kill us… Damn it…" Raph opened his eyes to stare at Don's face before he shifted to look at the ceiling. "Casey got out of the car, I had my hat and trench coat on and Mikey had fallen back asleep. He walked over to the car, just as the driver stepped out, and he apologies. Damn, never seen Casey's head snap around like that… At first I was just confused as Casey, damn I can't believe how far his head snapped around! Casey just looked at me; he looked like he was about to scream or something… I don't know what I was thinking as he fell to the ground like a sack of potato's all I know is that bastard who did it held up a gun and aimed it at me."

Don watched the side of Raph's face he could see before he blinked seeing confusion clearly written on the green skin and amber eye.

"Don," Raph's voice sounded broken, "That guy just laughed as he ordered me out of the car, couldn't even walk straight because I was damned… I did as they were told hoping they wouldn't see you guys in the back… He motioned for me to move by Casey, man the side of Casey's head looked like it was smashed inwards… I can't … I hope… god, Casey…"

"What… happened next, Raph?" Donatello motioned for continuance before Raph snapped his head to look at Don's own body.

"Damn bastard shot the car's engine." Don blinked before his eyes grew, "I barely knocked him out, couldn't see straight, and I… blacked out for a bit… next thing I remember was you three were out of the car, it was burning by this time, and Casey was next to ya… and… that bastard had friends!" Raph's fist slammed into the bottom of the clear casket before he took a breath.

"I got stunned, couldn't move… they began to just look at us before one of them pulled out a phone…" Raph paled as he closed his eyes and Don knew what he was doing when he watched Raph take even breaths to calm his racing pulse. It was a form of meditating that Splinter taught Raph for when he was trying to control his emotions so he didn't do anything to rash when he was trying to stay in control.

"I heard them call 'Agent Scenic' before they said a couple dumb things about 'Agent Bishop' and that crap." Raphael was calmly speaking now as he forced himself to, "They called that bastard an idiot and I watched, they kept shocking me every few minutes, as they injected some shit into you, Mikey, and Leo and… I couldn't do a damn thing… couldn't eve move! I…"

The door opened making the two grow silent as a casket, a turtle wrapped in bandages, was pushed into the room and replacing the area with the gear and blood.

"You're awake!" Howie called happily before walking over and looking down into Raph's eyes that narrowed into slits. "Don't look at me that way, Red, I'm just saying 'hi'."

"Screw you, dick wad." Howie chuckled before leaning down to the side and he giggled.

"You know, I like your brother, Blue, damn was he fun to mess with." Don watched as Raph froze his fingers twitching slightly, "Oh, Scenic told me to tell you that she's going to hold off for a while until that nasty dissection thing is better." Don didn't understand this but he realized that Raph did.

"Screw you…" it was weak and Don didn't know what was happening even as he watched Howie pull out a vile and syringe.

"Damn good answer! That's why I like ya, Red!" Raph growled as Howie continued to speak. Don slowly became scared before he heard, in horror, Raph ask a question.

"What'cha want this time?"

"Info is all, Red my boy, just info." Don could see Raph's facial muscles twitch, "Now, how did your brother, Blue, get that nasty scar under his left arm?" Don blinked before looking at what he could see of Leo, "I mean, come on, that didn't look like the others that obviously came from a sword…"

"Sai." Don blinked as he looked at Raph wondering what he just said, "I was pissed… that it?" Howie paused with the syringe half full before pulling it out.

"Hm, so… you also the one who sliced the back of his neck?" Don wasn't sure what was happening before Raph just chuckled.

"Nope," Howie blinked, "Leo did that during training."

"Your Sai?"

"Yes."

"You should tell him to stick with swords, any deeper and that would have sliced through to his spine… I take back any comment I might say in the future about Blue being smart." Don felt disgusted at how Raph and Howie talked like they were old friends, even if the only company Raph had was this sick bastard for four months, before Howie opened the case and, to Don's stunned surprise, Raphael didn't move or do anything to get out.

"How about I get ya some food… been, what… four days now?"

"Seven, dimwit, get your days straighten." The needle was injected before Raph slowly began to relax, Don spotted, before he looked to be out.

"See ya later, Purple, I'll bring ya and the otha some food later!" Howie pushed the cart with Raph's casketed body out of the door for who knew what.