A/N: So glad you liked the last chapter! The positive feedback makes my heart smile :) This might be the last update until Monday, but I'll try to bang out another chapter tomorrow. Just a warning that it might not happen.
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Chapter 7: Giving Up
Jasper:
Bella had caught a wolf that had been stalking some deer. Apparently deer were cute and got put on the side of the bunnies. She had only gotten a little upset when the deer were still terrified of her and had sprinted away.
When we got back to the house, only Rose and Emmett were there. Rose took one look at Bella and grabbed her hand.
"You can't spend your first day as a vampire looking like that. It's inhumane," she said. She dragged Bella upstairs and I heard the door to the bedroom shut and murmurs and rustling cloth as they dug through Rose's closet.
I looked at Emmett who was trying to force feed a carrot to the petrified bunny. Where he had gotten a carrot so quickly, I didn't want to know.
"You're going to kill it." I said, "Trying to feed it like that."
Emmett rolled his eyes at me. "Yeah, but it'll die if it doesn't eat, too. Lose, lose."
"Where is it going to live? Do you have a cage?"
"I have a few tanks from my other pets," he said, "but I'm thinking we can just let him roam the house. We'll be able to hear and smell him wherever he tries to hide."
"And its crap?" I asked, refusing to refer to it as 'he'.
Emmett shrugged. "We'll smell that, too."
"For the record, I don't approve." I said, "But I also recognize that nothing I say will sway your mind in the slightest."
"Truth." Emmett went back to poking the carrot at the rabbit's mouth. "How is the search going?" he asked.
"Badly. Apparently the river is too slow for them to easily buy that it washed her body away completely, so they haven't stopped looking yet. From what I have gathered, no one has suggested foul play, but Charlie, her father, has been feeling suspicious lately. I really won't be relaxed until they have a funeral."
I felt a strong wave of embarrassment from upstairs followed by shock. It had to be Bella; who knew what ridiculous outfits Rose was dressing her up in?
"I wonder what they're getting up to." I pondered out loud.
"Chick stuff." Emmett replied. "Bella probably feels more comfortable around Rosalie since she's, like, the other girl in the house. She needs someone to answer all of her questions, and Rose can do that for her."
"I can do that, too." I grumbled.
Emmett placed his finger on the rabbit's lower jaw and we both felt its heart beat kick up significantly. He bopped the bunny's jaw up and down in time with his words.
"SOMEone wikes feewing needed. SOMEone can't stand being wepwaced." His baby talk grated on my nerves.
"You don't know what you're talking about, Em." I would have argued further, but Rosalie's door opened and I heard the girls descending the stairs. I looked up and saw Bella coming down.
My gut tightened again and I was painfully aware that I was staring.
It honestly wasn't fair. I knew my emotions were being manipulated, that vampires were built to be amazingly alluring, but that knowledge didn't change the fact that Bella was stunning.
Rose had done something with Bella's eyes that made them seem impossibly large and clear. The animal blood had muddied the pure, glowing red into a deeper maroon. Her hair was almost the same color as her eyes now, a deep burgundy, and it curled gently down past her shoulders from where it had been pinned back at the temples. Bella was wearing a white dress that cinched at her waist and flowed outward ending right above her knees. The neckline of the dress was edged in a deep blue lace that framed her clavicle. I had never noticed it on a girl before, but I couldn't stop staring at Bella's collarbone.
Until I noticed her blood red lipstick.
I knew I was expected to say something.
"You look better." I rasped, my voice rough with suppressed... something. I turned away and busied myself sorting through some mail that was lying on the counter. It wasn't fair. I had become accustomed to Rose, Alice, even Esme. It was just Bella's newness that was overwhelming me, and I didn't like feeling out of control.
"Have you ever read Bunnicula?" Bella asked suddenly. I snapped my head around, but she was looking at Emmett.
"Whassat?" He grunted in response.
She giggled. "You should read it."
My cell phone rang and I scrambled to pull it out of my pocket. Carlisle. I flipped it open.
"Hello?"
"Charlie was just in the hospital with some crash survivors. He told me they set a date." I was relieved and anxious at the same time. "It's Saturday."
"Tomorrow. Okay. I'll let her know." I said.
"I'll let the rest of the family know." Carlisle said.
"Just Edward and Esme," I said, "I'm with Em and Rose."
"Okay." Carlisle said. We hung up without saying goodbye.
I looked over at Bella whose face was wide-eyed in astonishment.
"Oh my God!" she said, "Charlie! He must be panicking! He must be totally losing his shit! I have to go let him know I'm okay."
She moved toward the door, but Rose grabbed her arm and Emmet moved to block her path. He was still petting his bunny and he looked at Bella apologetically.
"No can do, Bells," he said.
Bella turned to look at me. "What's going on?"
I took a deep, steadying breath. "Bella, Charlie thinks your dead. When Edward bit you," she cringed a little, "we knew what you were becoming and we had to make sure that—we wanted to give your friends and family some sense of closure."
Bella's eyes were unfocused, and if I didn't know that it was impossible for vampires, I would have said she was about to pass out.
"What does that mean?" she asked.
I rushed over and grabbed her arms to hold her steady. I gently shook her until she made eye contact.
"Bella," I said,
"We faked your death."
Bella:
I would be okay if I didn't think about cute little baby wolf cubs. Think about Bambi, I told myself. Think about Bambi.
Jasper didn't speak to me the whole way back to the house, and I found myself about to blurt out completely asinine remarks like, 'That was some good wolf back there, huh?' just so I could hear him speak.
When we entered the house, Rose took one look at me and dragged my ass upstairs.
"You can't spend your first day as a vampire looking like that," she said, "It's inhumane."
How fitting, I thought, as I am no longer human.
I should be grateful to not be dead dead. Like unmoving dead. Better an undead creature of the night than to be actually dead.
Speaking of which, the whole not bursting into flames in the sun thing? Pleasant surprise.
Rosalie dragged me into her room.
"I've got some of my clothes and some of Alice's clothes she left behind. I figure maybe my pants and Alice's tops? That should do you, right?"
"Who's Alice?" I asked.
"Jasper's ex." She replied.
I was speechless.
"Where—where is she?"
"She left." Rosalie said matter-of-factly as she threw clothes across the room. "Thing is, she saw you being attacked by Edward and decided not to warn any of us because she also saw you and her being besties."
I was confused. "Wait, she was in the forest when Edward attacked, too?"
Rosalie was puzzled. "What? No! She saw it. In a vision."
"Oh." I said, and I nodded my head like I wasn't freaking out.
"So," Rosalie said, "What do you think of Jasper?"
I immediately felt my face flush in embarrassment. Rosalie gaped at me.
"You—" she stumbled over her words, "You're blushing!" She was speaking so quietly that I almost had to strain to hear.
"Oh, god. I know." I said, "I turn bright red. So not flattering."
"No, " Rose said, "It's not that. Vampires don't blush. They can't."
It was my turn to gape. "What is wrong with me?"
She didn't even try to comfort me.
"I don't know." She said.
Rose returned to flipping through clothing like I wasn't the world's most incompetent vampire before she pulled out a full-skirted white dress edged in dark blue lace.
"Now, tell me:" She said, "Is this Bella Swan?" She twirled the dress and motioned for me to stand up. She held the dress against me.
"I love it." I said.
"It's yours." Rose said. I quickly stepped out of my bloody jeans and top. "Um, could you… I dunno… turn around?"
Rose scoffed but did as I asked. "That's gonna get old, quick. We don't really do modesty." She spoke over her shoulder, but kept her eyes closed. "We're vampires."
So I was coming to understand. I took off my underwear which were also steeped in blood. I realized I didn't have any to change into.
"Um, Rose?" I asked hesitantly, "Could I borrow… you know… underthings?"
"Top drawer."
I went over and pulled it open.
Holy leather and lace.
I held up a pair of panties that were made from a triangle of lace and ribbons and held together by not much more than prayer.
"Any chance you have something less…" I struggled for the right word, "…non-existent?"
"Take 'em or leave 'em, Bell." Rose said.
Anything was better than going commando in a dress. I had learned that much from trashy tabloids, if nothing else. I pulled on the underwear and matching bra which squashed my boobs into some semblance of cleavage. I slipped on the dress, which fit like a dream, and turned back to Rosalie.
"Kay, you can turn back around."
Rose looked at me and started hopping up and down. "Oh, you are so gorgeous! The boys will flip. Here, let me fix up your face."
She shoved me into a chair and started yanking my hair and brushing stuff onto my face. When I opened my eyes and looked in the mirror, I had been totally transformed. The make-up combined with my new vampire enhancements made me completely unrecognizable.
"The finishing touch," she said, "you have to do yourself. I have always been shit at putting on other people's lipstick." She held out a tube of bright red lipstick.
"I don't wear red lipstick," I hedged, "It makes me look even paler than I actually am."
"Vampire." She said as she pointed at me, "You're gonna have to learn to live with pale. Besides, you only get one first day as a vamp. Might as well go all out."
I glared at her, but grabbed the lipstick and applied it, managing not to get it all over my face. I loudly smacked my lips and gave an exaggerated pout.
"How do I look?" I asked.
Rose smirked at me. "Let's go see," she said.
We left her room and Rose made me walk in front of her as we neared the steps. When I turned the corner and began to descend the staircase, I saw Jasper staring up at me.
I wondered if he realized he was staring. His eyes had darted all up and down me before settling on… my neck? Must be a vampire thing. I felt myself growing warm under his gaze when he turned away suddenly.
"You look better." He said roughly. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't hurt. Better? I had never looked better in my life.
I made myself look anywhere but him, needing to distract myself before he felt my distress. My eyes landed on Emmett. I bit back a chuckle. The hulking vampire was hunched over an itty baby bunny and the sight cracked me up.
"Have you read Bunnicula?" I asked him. In my periphery I saw Jasper look at me.
Emmett hadn't read the book. It was about a vampire rabbit that drained vegetables of juice. I thought he would get a kick out of it. I couldn't help but laugh.
"You should read it." I said.
Jasper's cell phone rang, and he answered it. "Hello?" he asked. The voice on the other line--I think it was Carlisle--began talking about Charlie. After I heard that, I only listened to every other word of the conversation.
Charlie! He would be so worried about me. How long had I been out? Three days? He would be terrified!
As soon as Jasper hung up the phone I began babbling:
"Oh my God, Charlie! He must be panicking! He must be totally losing his shit! I have to go let him know I'm okay!" I bolted for the door, but Rosalie physically restrained me. Emmett blocked the door as he stroked his rabbit, looking like a demented Dr. Evil.
"No can do, Bells," he said.
"What's going on?" I asked Jasper. His looked at me sympathetically. I wanted to scream at him. I don't need your sympathy! I need my father.
"Bella, Charlie thinks you're dead." Jasper said. He started talking about 'closure' for my friends and family. I had thought that I had nothing left for them to steal after they took my humanity. It turns out my humanity wasn't enough; they needed my entire life.
"What does that mean?" I felt like I was going to be sick.
Jasper ran over and held my shoulders, forcing me to look at him. My skin burned under his touch and I wanted to push him away, but I was too weak to even move.
"Bella," he said, and a piece of his golden hair fell into his face. I wanted to rip it out.
"We faked your death."
Then I did push him away. I shoved him away and brushed past Rosalie. Emmett reached out, but my glare made him back off. I was aware that I was trembling, but I couldn't seem to stop it. Everything was hitting me at once, and I couldn't sort through it quickly enough. I felt like I was collapsing under all of the stimuli.
I backed into a corner and leaned against the wall. One moment of Jasper's half-heard conversation with Carlisle filtered back to me and I latched on to it.
"When you say Charlie set a date," I asked, "you mean…?"
Jasper took two steps toward me.
"A date for the funeral," he said.
"Of course." I said, like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Then my vision crackled to darkness and I blacked out.
A/N: Bunnicula, by James Howe.