A/N I hope you all are enjoying the story.

Disclaimer: honestly there's a reason why it's fanfiction.

Christmas came and past in Cair Paravel. Instead of being a joyous occasion, it only severed as a reminded of their King who was no longer there. The three remaining monarchs sat in the great hall eating dinner in silence. Every time Lucy looked up into the faces of her siblings, Susan looked as if she was about to burst into tears at any moment. And Peter, Peter looked as if he couldn't even stand his own company, let alone the company of anyone else. The normally bright, shining, castle stood shrouded in darkness as the early winter night droned on. Peter stood up, slowly as he was finished eating, and went to pick up his plate but jabbed his hands into his pockets instead. His hands were still shaking. Even though he was trying to hide it Lucy caught sigh, and shared a look with Susan. She nodded faintly at her younger sister and went back to picking aimlessly at her food. Lucy got up to follow her brother. He turned a corner and she lost sigh of him for a moment.

"Peter," she shouted as she looked around and noticed the door to Edmund's apartment was opened slightly. She stood stunned at the threshold of the door; Peter had refused to come anywhere near Edmund's room. Could he really have wandered in? "Peter," she called again in a whisper. There was something sacred about Edmund's room. It just seemed inappropriate to shout. Everything was still, and all the objects left scatted about were sitting where Edmund had left them before he… left. Peter was sitting at the chess board staring at a game he and Edmund had started a week before the left for battle. A game Edmund would have won too. Lucy looked over the broad, Peter would have taken Edmund's knight drawing his queen out, and Edmund would have taken the queen forcing a check mate. Peter saw this as well. He looked up at his sister with helpless eyes, and then in a fit of rage threw the chess broad in the ground. The pieces scattered amongst the other clutter.

"He's just like that…" Peter cried in anger. "He would sacrifice the knight to win. And I would have been foolish enough to sacrifice the queen to beat the knight. I would have lost this game. I keep looking at it and every scenario he beats me." Lucy went up and placed her arms around her older brother and he shrugged them off harsher than he intended and Lucy stood back. She was trying to be patient, she really was, but all of his emotion came out as blind fury. Lucy knew Peter hadn't properly grieved for Edmund.

"Oh Peter," she pleaded. "I wish you just talk about this with me." She turned and saw him staring at the painting she had presented to him for Christmas. Lucy had a painting commissioned, by the fairies, of the four of them dancing at Edmund's twentieth birthday. It was so radiant it looked as if you could walk right into it. The iridescent emerald of Susan dress seemed to swirl as she danced with Edmund shining in a cerulean and silver tunic. Lucy's dress, clad in brilliant sapphire, swished as she danced with Peter dressed in vermillion and gold. They had looked so happy. Edmund's normally solemn face was alight with an easy, carefree smile. Now it seemed like no one would ever smile again and the painting was hidden away.

When Lucy presented the painting to Peter she thought that it would be a good thing for them, a way to keep the family as whole as possible. That it would help remember Edmund in a happy time so they could never forget his face. She never expected the backlash that followed. Peter ordered the painting to be removed from his sight immediately and threatened to have it burned. Susan managed to sneak it off because she still liked to look at it, even if it did make her cry. So this is where she hid it.

"Why is this still here?" Peter growled in a lone tone. "I thought I had it burned."

"We, Susan and I, couldn't bear to see it gone." Peter reached for his sword and was going to slash the painting to bits, but he for some reason thought otherwise. "It makes her feel better looking at it. It's Susan's way of copping with… this… Something you need to do."

"I don't need to do anything Lucy. I'm more than capable of taking care of my self." He turned to go, but Lucy grabbed his arm. "Let me go."

"You are being so selfish you know that. Susan and I are working our selves to the bone trying to hold this kingdom together. And you, you just sit here feeling sorry for your self, getting angry at the drop of a hat and shouting in court. It is very unbecoming of a King, let alone a High King." Lucy knew it was a low blow, but she had to get through to her brother some how. The fact was Edmund was gone, and while she missed him terribly (she still cried herself to sleep every night), Narnia was still here and needed their guidance. "Don't think you're the only one who misses him. You've hardly spoken to Susan since you got back and she's been suffering greatly as well." Peter looked up and finally started to listen to Lucy.

"What do you mean?"

"For one thing she feels, right now, like she's lost both of her brothers." Lucy then looked down and her tone softened. "And Peter, you've always been my confidant and I yours. But think about it, who do you think Susan confided in?"

"I guess I always kind of thought it was you…" Lucy sighed deeply and sat down next to her brother.

"It was Edmund. She explained it to me as something of a middle child thing. They've been very close, why do you think he's always going with her to look at her suitors." To be honest Peter never really thought about it. He'd just always assumed it was Edmund's roll. Lucy shook her head. "Because she wanted his approval first."

"He died in my arms Lucy. I can't just forget that it happened like you can." Lucy looked as if she'd been punched in the face. She stood up and grabbed her brother face and forced it close to hers.

"Is that what you think I'm trying to do Peter." He looked defiant for a moment and then realized what he had just said and shook his head. The look in his eyes changed from anger to sorrow. He never meant to hurt his dearest sister.

"No, Lu, I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that." Lucy was so forgiving. She placed her arms back around her older brother and pressed her cheek to his broad shoulder. For once he let them linger. "I just… every time I close my eyes I see the light fading from his eyes. I hear the choke in his throat as his breath hitched. I'm not sleeping well. And I know you've been watching me; I can hardly hold my hands steady. Oreius has all but canceled our sparing training. He's also taken over inspecting and training the new recruits. I've not even seen half of them. And I know I should."

"Peter, this is not an easy time for any of us, least of all you. But you need to let us be there for you. Susan and I love you so much, and we need to stick together. This whole enraged bitterness has to stop. You are a King! Appointed by Aslan himself to care for all of Narnia and we have to think about our country."

"Lucy I…" She knew he was about to say he couldn't.

"Start slowly. Susan and I have been keeping hearth and home together so far, but we need you to start coming back. We have a court session tomorrow, at the very least I expect you to hold your temper. Then I recommend calling up the army for an inspection. Also Susan's birthday is in a few weeks. We should at least plan something special for her. Aslan knows we need at least something joyous to celebrate in this dark time." Peter nodded in agreement and the two of them sat together for several minutes. Glistening tear drops were falling down his cheeks. This was the first time Peter had cried since that fateful day on the battle field. Lucy handed him her handkerchief and kissed him on the forehead.

"My dear sister you really are the valiant one of the family. Always thinking of other's needs ahead of your own. We should plan Susan a grand party. It will be for the good of the kingdom."

"Come on lets head to the kitchen, I think you need some dessert." As the two of them exited Edmund's room they found Susan rounding the corner. Lucy knew she was going to stare at the painting again, so put her one arm around her and the other around Peter. "Susan we're going for dessert you should come with us." Susan looked at Peter and then at Lucy seeing them together made her smiled her beautiful smile. It was the first time any one of them had smiled in weeks.

"Yes, of course."

I know I've not received a lot of reviews on this, A Big Thank You to those who are reviewing. Mainly dbd823, and princess emma of narnia for sticking with my story and reviewing. I don't write to get reviews but they make for excellent positive reinforcement. Also they make the dolphins, manatees, and octopus at work very happy. Okay not really but still I appreciate them.