Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts, its characters or storyline. This collection is mine, as are Jake, Duke, and the bartender. Enjoy!

..:-X-:..

182 – Dress for Success

For justagirl8225

Yuffie adjusted the corset design of the dress. "I wish I had boobs." She lamented, looking at her reflection in the dressing room mirror.

Aerith snorted, "No you don't. They're a hassle."

"They would make this dress fit better." The younger woman frowned, adjusting it again. "Tifa would fill this thing out like—"

"And for that, she has back problems." Aerith said, thumbing through the dresses in front of her. "She sees a chiropractor twice a month."

"Yeah, but she also gets Leon Therapy." Yuffie mumbled.

Aerith paused, "Are you still sour because he said no?"

"The whole town is gonna be there, Aer!" Yuffie despaired. "This isn't like a high school prom. This is a Radiant Garden-wide party. He has to go. I'm going. Why can't we go together?"

"He has Tifa Therapy."

"Yeah, and her two girlfriends." Yuffie huffed, "They've been dating for like three days."

"A month," She corrected gently, "and that's just counting how long they've admitted it. You know where this is going—"

"No. I don't." Yuffie pouted, unzipping the dress.

Aerith handed her another one, "She's helping to coordinate this party. You can't just hit on Leon all the time like you used to."

"Why not? Tifa knows I'm joking. So does Leon." Yuffie slipped into another dress.

"I know they do. That's not the thing—"

"What, she doesn't find me threatening?" She straightened, "Because even without double Ds, I'm a sexual bombshell! If Leon ever got a piece of this—" She struck a pose, "He'd walk wrong for a week!"

Aerith winced, "Yuffie, remember that conversation we had about filtering your words?" She sighed, zipping up the top of the eighteenth dress Yuffie had tried on. "He's older than you. You're like a kid sister to him and me."

"Six years is not that big'a difference." She pouted. "I'm not a child."

"But on a maturity level, you two are decades apart." Aerith looked at Yuffie. "I think this dress is the winner. It looks gorgeous."

The other woman looked thoughtfully at her reflection for a beat and then to Aerith. "I'm not declaring my love for him or anything. I just want to know why he never showed interest in you or me all those years, but Tifa shows up and they're Lucy and Ricky."

Aerith wasn't sure she could answer that. "Maybe he tossed a coin."

"Oh, har har. Help me outta this thing." Yuffie started to fight the zipper on the back.

"Okay, hold still." She stepped up behind her. "Have you asked anybody else?"

"That Jake Alms guy who's always bugging Tabaeus McCallister."

"You like him?" Aerith tried to sound open minded, but in all honesty, that guy was…a bit of a man whore.

"No, but he tells better jokes than Biggs or Wedge, and Tabaeus begged me to ask him before he asked her. So…there." She shrugged out of the dress and started changing into her normal clothes.

"Shoes next?" Aerith prompted a change in subject.

"Sure, did you already get a dress?"

"Last week." Aerith nodded.

"So you actually got ol' Chocobo Head to agree to go?"

Aerith sighed, "I got him to say he'd try, but he's got a mission the day of. He might make the tail end of it."

"So that leaves you, me, Tifa…and Leon…I vote gang bang."

"Filter."

"I know." Yuffie laughed, "But I'm getting one dance, either way." Aerith shook her head and Yuffie looked down at her chest, "Maybe if I stuffed a few chicken cutlets…"

"Yuffie."

"Hey, you never hear about 'love at first personality'."

"Lord help the man who falls in love with you."

"Walkin' wrong for a week!"

"We're in public, people can hear—"

"Float like a butterfly—"

"Where do you hear these things—"

"Sting like a bee!"

"Yuffie!"

"That's right, say my name!"

"Filter!"

..:-X-:..

183 – Advice from a Bartender and Cid

For Eva Von Dee

"Am I crazy?" Tifa asked no one in particular, eyes on the counter.

"Right now or in general?" The woman who ran the Traverse Town Tavern asked, not looking up from her notebook.

"Leon asked me to move in with him." Tifa replied.

Her friend looked up, chewing on her pen, "Er—haven't you two been sharing an apartment for…a few years now?"

Tifa frowned and waved a hand. "No, no, no, I mean…He bought a house…Without asking me."

"I bought a car last month without asking anybody. A man needs permission to buy a house?"

"Not perm—Not like that. I mean…yes, we're lived together for awhile and recently become…more than friends…It was obvious that he meant for both of us to live in the house and when he surprised me with it…"

"Please tell me you two christened the kitchen floor with sweet lovemaking."

"What? No!" Tifa tapped the table, "You're missing my point."

"If you find a man who wants to make that kind of commitment to you, and you haven't even had sex with him yet—" When Tifa looked at her, she whistled, "You little slut!" she laughed, "We get together for drinks and chatter every week and you leave out THAT detail?"

"That happened after the house situation." Tifa said, "I thought—"

"How was it?"

"That's not—We're talking about the house. Me, him, us—sharing a house."

"C'mon, what were his grades?" She pressed.

Tifa exhaled heavily, sensing that the conversation wouldn't go on until she told her friend what she wanted. "It was fantastic, okay? Several times. At one point, I thought I heard electric guitar in the background."

A few feet away, Jake Alms stopped dead in his tracks, gawking at her. The older woman straightened, making a shooing gesture.

"Keep walking, virgin boy." She tutted before looking back to Tifa…then immediately over her shoulder, "Speaking of electric guitar…Pilot! Gotta question for ya!"

Tifa wanted to shrink into the floor as Cid lumbered over, cigarette between his teeth, hand on a bottle, eyes on the barkeep. "What?" He grunted, "For the last time, I won't have sex with you for money, woman!"

"Oh shut up. We need a man's opinion." The woman said, chuckling at him. "Leon bought a house. What does that mean?"

Sinking…Floor…Seriously.

"It means he's madly in love with you, wants 5 kids and has the diamond ring hidden in the sock drawer." Cid puffed on his cigarette. "That's what you crazy women want to hear, right?"

The woman smacked him. "I'm serious, pilot."

Cid sighed and looked to Tifa. "Whoever put men in the box of noncommittal never met Leon. In relationships, in Radiant Garden's reconstruction…the guy's a Labrador." He exhaled smoke. "What did you say?"

"I loved the house. I was overwhelmed." Tifa lifted her shoulders.

"Do you take it back? Feel different?"

"No, but sharing rent on an apartment and living together in a house…together…It's a big step."

"Is it too big a step for you?" The barkeep asked.

Tifa mouthed soundlessly. There was no explaining this to these two. He was half drunk and she was half in his pants. Grimacing, she stood.

"Thanks, but I think I'll just talk to Leon about it."

"Shoulda done that in the first place." Cid put out his cigarette.

"Good luck, Tifa." The woman said before promptly batting her eye lashes at Cid and offering him another drink.

Tifa left the tavern and started toward the hangar. Maybe she was scared of this step. She had every right to be, right? The idea of getting more serious with Leon made her stomach flutter, but it also made her breathing constrict.

Maybe that was okay.

Jake Alms sauntered up beside her. "Y'know, I've been taking guitar lessons—"

"Go home, Alms."

..:-X-:..

184 – Farce in the Furniture Department

For raiko. EXE

Leon had followed Tifa halfway through the department before realizing what they were looking at. "Sectionals…really?"

"Of course." Tifa tutted, holding the cashier tickets for two desks, a drawer, a table and chairs, a vanity, and three end tables…and one high backed swivel chair.

"Might be a little cramped."

"That's the thing about houses, Leon." Tifa smirked. "They tend to hold more furniture than an apartment."

Leon sighed and looked around. Tifa had gone haywire in all three furniture stores so far. The madness appeared to have continued to store four. "It's a house, not a condo."

"I haven't lived in an actual house since before the invasion." She quipped. "So I'm going to splurge."

He waved her off…like she needed the encouragement. They had had a long discussion recently about the house. He hadn't thought that living with her in a house and an apartment were that different, but after hearing her point out those differences…and steps, she kept mentioning steps…He was starting to see where her hesitation was coming from.

It didn't change his mind any though.

"No to the sectional?" Tifa prompted.

"I don't…I don't know. I'm not against it." He shrugged.

"We can come back to it." She looked at her list—oh yes, she had a list—"Next up is the bedroom. I take it you're definitely not against that."

He looked at her and then at some of the ridiculous coffee table designs.

She smirked but then abruptly stopped walking. "No way."

Leon followed her gaze to the nauseatingly familiar design on one of the sectionals. "No way is right."

She dug out a square of fabric—he knew that salmon-puke color anywhere. "It's like the couch's long lost cousin!"

"No." Leon shook his head. "What is that?"

She held up the fabric, "A sample of the couch's upholstery. I had to make sure anything we bought would match it."

"That couch is not going into the house."

"Oh yes it is. It was part of our roommate agreement."

"I've been meaning to revise that…The only place that monstrosity is going is the trash."

"No, no, I got my couch, you got Duke. That was the deal."

"Duke stays. Couch goes."

"Duke stays. Couch stays. I'm not getting rid of it."

"I don't care. It gives me nightmares."

..:-X-:..

A/N 183: That bartender is the same one from the second chapter of Just Like the Ones I Used to Know...I thought Cid needed a love interest...If she ends up sticking around I'll give her a name then.

Also, I've worked it out so that in order to complete all of the prompts I still have yet to write, this collection will end up with exactly 40 chapters. Woot. There will be 39 prompt chapters and the 40th chapter will be the big finale, probably one long ditty. I haven't decided what to do for it yet, so let me know what genre you'd like to see in the finale!