Fenris
"Oh! She's so cute and tiny!" Merrill said cooing at Abby as she arrived with Isabela.
"Wow, Varric! You weren't exaggerating. She is really a child now." Isabela said as she looked down at sleeping Abby. She was curled up in my bed, her hand holding tightly to mine. Somehow along the way home, she had fallen asleep in my arms. When I laid her down, she had clasped onto me and wouldn't let go. Not that I minded. I was more than happy to watch over her. "We are going to have to find her something to wear. Something ruffled and frilly. Maybe some ribbons. Wouldn't she be adorable with pigtails?"
"Are you hoping to die?" Varric asked with a laugh.
"This isn't right. We have to do something. Maybe the templars are…" Aveline started, but stopped as I glared at her.
"She is terrified of them." Anders explained. "The best we can do is keep her safe until we can unravel this. Or maybe the spell will end and she'll be back. Or maybe we're stuck with baby Hawke."
"I'm not a baby!" Abby protested sleepily as she woke up and climbed into my lap.
Isabela smiled at her and sat beside me. "Are you really remembering everything and just using this as an excuse to cling to Fenris?"
"Leave her alone, Isabela." I said and put my arms around Abby.
"That's a pretty name." Abby said watching Isabela.
"I rather like it myself." Isabela winked at her. Abby smiled back.
"Are we friends?" Abby asked watching the pirate.
"We sure are, angel." Isabela said. I saw the pained look in her eyes that she masked quickly with the smile. She was finally realizing how bad this really was. Despite the fact Abby was rather cute and sweet, she had no idea who we were. She didn't understand what was going on, and she wanted her parents.
"Fenris is my friend too." She said as she played with the buckle on my gauntlet.
"What about the rest of us?" Varric asked her. She turned to look at him, keeping a grip on my gauntlet.
"Well…I think I know you too. Are you friends of my daddy?" She asked.
"We're friends of your's Hawke." Aveline said moving closer.
Abby frowned. "My name is Abby. Only Daddy is called Hawke."
"She doesn't seem to like to be called that." I pointed out. Abby turned around and hugged me, curling up in my arms.
"Seems she's decided she likes Broody. So do you think that means she'll finally admit to her crush on him?" Varric asked grinning at her.
"We need to get her situated and see about the mage." Anders pointed out. He was clearly angry about the situation. I was sure if she was wrapped around him, he would have been fine with it.
"I want to go and see a mage." Abby said lifting her head up to look at him hopefully.
"Maybe later, sweetie." Anders smiled at her.
She pouted and crossed her arms. "You aren't my boss."
"Oh, ho! Hawke was a bit of a brat. I love it!" Varric laughed. She stuck her tongue out at him before turning back to me.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and turned big pleading eyes to me. Her lip quivered just a bit. Abby was dangerous no matter what age she was it seemed. "Please?"
"Abby, right now we need to take care of things. How about you stay here with Merrill and Isabela? Merrill is a mage and Dalish." I said hating that I was going to leave her in the blood mage's hands, but there was little choice right now. Abby's eyes lit up as she looked around the room and saw Merrill.
"We can have lots of fun, lethallan." Merrill smiled at her.
"Can you make the dolls dance around too? Bethany does that when Mother sends us to bed. Makes Carver mad, but he doesn't tell on her." Abby said.
"We'll find some dolls and try it." Merrill promised.
"Kay." Abby nodded to her. She then turned back to me. "You won't leave me too, will you?"
I hugged her to me. "No, Abby. I'll never leave you. I'm just going downstairs to talk with the mage. I'll be right back."
"I'll go and find her something to wear. And play with, I suppose." Aveline offered.
"No, you stay with Merrill. I'll go find her stuff. You wouldn't get her the cute stuff. You would find her little armor or something." Isabela frowned at her.
"It's Hawke…Abby, we're talking about, Isabela. She isn't going to want a dress and ribbons." Aveline shook her head at Isabela.
"I know, but won't she be adorable! And we can push her until she remembers!" Isabela pulled Abby from me. Abby made a protesting noise and I quickly pulled her back.
"Don't touch her if she doesn't want touched." I frowned at Isabela.
"Oooo! Papa Fenris is all protective. Maybe Danarius should have named you for a bear rather than a wolf." Isabela smirked at me.
"Don't be mean to my Fenris!" Abby said glaring at Isabela.
"Aw! Abby's still got that glare down. Not so frightening coming from such a tiny thing. Just cute now." Varric said and chucked her under her chin. She turned in my arms and wrapped around me again, burying her face in my neck.
"We're wasting time here." Anders snapped.
"I agree. Abby, will you stay here with Merrill and Aveline?" I asked pulling her back. She looked up at me with that pouty face and I almost caved.
"You'll come back for me?" She asked.
"Always." I promised. She threw her arms around my neck and kissed my cheek.
"Kay then. Wanna play hide and seek?" She asked turning to smile charmingly at Merrill.
"I think it would be best if you played something where you could stay in this room for now." I said worried about her getting lost in this big house. Maybe I should have put more effort into righting it. She could get hurt on so many different things. Maybe we should move into the Amell estate for now.
I stopped my train of thought then. Hopefully this would be over in a few minutes. Abby would be back to her normal self and we would all have a good laugh at this. She would return to her house. She wouldn't need me to watch over her. She wouldn't want me to watch over her.
"Did I make you sad?" She asked stroking my cheek, watching me with those eyes I loved so much. Only they were normally on a woman that I could think of loving, rather than a tiny girl who looked at me so trustingly.
"No, Abby. Just stay in this room until I'm back with you, alright?" She nodded and reached for Merrill. Merrill cuddled her close and offered to play other games with her. I paused a moment in the doorway to watch the three women crowd around her. Abby smiled at me and then began giggling about something Isabela was saying.
"Now you know what her child would look like. Crazy, isn't it?" Varric shook his head. "Too bad a certain man is too cautious to ever go after her. They could have a few of their own right now."
"She isn't interested in anyone, Varric. Let it go." I sighed. Varric was always taunting me about her. Merrill did as well. Apparently I wasn't as good at hiding my feelings from the others as I was from her.
"Oh come on, Broody! She just called you her Fenris. She wasn't afraid of you at all."
"Can we focus on the mage here? If we don't figure this out, talking about Abby this way will be mote anyway." Anders snapped and started towards the basement where we had chained the mage up.
-0-
I jerked the mage up and reached back with my glowing fist. She watched me horrified. "Do not play stupid, mage. The only thing keeping me from killing you is your usefulness. If you say you can't undo the spell, there is no need to keep you alive."
"Fenris, stop scaring her. Her being scared is what got us in this mess to begin with." Anders protested shoving me aside. He held a cup of water for the mage. She trembled against him.
"I didn't mean to hurt the Champion. I was so scared." She whined looking at him pleadingly.
"I know, Rona. We have to figure this out though. Hawke can't stay like this. We mages need her. Think. What spell were you trying to rework?" He said soothing the mage.
"I…I…" She stammered looking at me.
"Speak, mage!" I growled.
"Fenris, maybe it would be better if you went back to Hawke…Abby." Varric suggested.
"So Anders can cater to the mage?" I snarled.
"No, so we can get something out of her. She's too scared of you now." Varric sighed. "Go on. Make sure Abby hasn't killed Isabela."
"Do not release the chains." I warned.
Anders narrowed his eyes at me. "I'm not stupid, Fenris. Besides, you took the only key."
"I'll be back." I warned and stalked off.
I ran into Aveline pacing the main hall. She looked up as she saw me. "Did you manage to get anything?" She asked.
"No. Is Abby alright?" I asked worried.
"She…that isn't the Hawke we all know. She…I…" Aveline shook her head.
"What do you mean?" I asked glancing up at my room. I could hear giggling coming from the room.
"You wouldn't believe me if you didn't see it." She sighed. "I need to get back to the barracks. I'll keep an ear out for any movement from the Gallows."
"Thank you, Aveline." I nodded to her.
"Keep me up to date. If you need anything…"
"I'll let you know." I said and hurried up the stairs. I froze in the door, stunned motionless as surely as if I had been hit by a spell.
Abby was sitting in Isabela's lap. Her chocolate curls in two perky pigtails held in place with purple bows. A matching frilly purple dress on. She was clapping her tiny hands together as Merrill made a group of dolls dance around. Her emerald eyes lit up as she saw me.
"Fenris! Come see what Merrill can do!" She called happily. I moved into the room slowly.
"Abby?" I asked worried as she seemed perfectly content in the outfit, hair do, and were those ribboned slippers?
"Hmm?" She asked holding her hands up for me to take her. I gathered her close and looked at her. "Do it again for Fenris, please." She said turning to smile at Merrill. Merrill eyed me warily.
"I don't think that's a good idea, Abby. Maybe we can do it again later."
"Are you tired?" She asked cocking her head to the side. "Daddy says mages aren't supposed to play with their magic. Did I ask you to do a bad thing?"
"No, lethallan. It was fun. I should go and check on Bandit. Should we bring him over?" Merrill asked looking back and forth between us.
"Maybe we should wait a bit before we bring him here." I said glancing at Abby
"Did you not make any progress on it? Not that this isn't fun. Abby is a sweetheart who loves it when Auntie Isabela plays with her hair, huh, angel?" Isabela asked and tickled Abby who squealed with glee and squirmed in my arms.
"Bela got me this dress. Isn't it pretty?" She asked smiling at me.
"It…is." I said slowly and slightly unsure.
Abby had never seemed very…girly before. It wasn't that she wasn't beautiful, she was very beautiful. But she didn't spend much time on her looks. She wore her long hair in a simple braid. Her armor was always nice, but it was more about function with her. The only thing she liked to be pretty were her daggers. She hadn't even wanted to fix up her estate. If it hadn't been for her mother and Bohdan she would have probably still been using the furnishings and such from the slavers who had been in it before she had bought it back for her mother.
"She's going to be the belle of Kirkwall." Isabela smiled at her. Abby's smile died right away. She turned to me fearfully.
"Kirkwall? That's a bad place. The templars are after Daddy there. Mother's family's there, but they don't like us. I don't want to go there."
"You're in Kirkwall, Abby." Merrill said before we could stop her.
"No!" Abby cried and stiffened in my arms.
"Abby, it's going to be alright." I tried to reassure her.
"Is that why Daddy and Mother left me? Was I bad so they sent me here?" She asked looking at me with tear filled eyes.
"No, honey. You weren't bad. They needed you to be safe. So they sent you here with us. We're all going to keep you safe, angel." Isabela soothed her.
"The templar was angry in the tunnels." She said cuddling close to me. "I'm not a mage so why did they want to take me?"
"Because a mage cast a spell on you. They wanted to try and undo it." I explained as I sat down, shifting her so she was on my knee.
"Is that why I don't remember?" She asked looking at me solemnly.
"Yes." I answered past the lump in my throat.
"That wasn't nice of the mage." She said as she began to play with my hair. "I like your hair." She smiled at me. I couldn't help but smile back at her.
"Well, she's still Abby. Random mind." Isabela smiled at her.
"Daddy says my mind works too fast. He says I can't keep up with it. But my mouth goes ahead of it sometimes." She frowned and quirked her mouth to the side. "That's what Mother says." I coughed to cover my laugh. Merrill giggled and shook her head.
"Are you alright to keep her? I could take her back to the estate. Orana and Bohdan could help with her." Isabela suggested as she started towards the door.
"She's staying with me. If this drags out, I'll move us there. I promised her I wouldn't leave her. And I won't." I said looking down into those trusting eyes.
"Fenris saved me from the templars. He glowed all blue and stuff. It was awesome. He's my knight." Abby said turning to smile at Isabela.
"Your knight?" Merrill asked cocking her head to the side as she appraised Abby who was still running her hands through my hair.
"Uh, huh. That's what knights do. They protect girls from the bad guys." She smiled at me then and I found myself grinning again. She was a charmer for sure. I wondered if we were seeing the Abby she would have been if things had been easier for her family. A little girl who still believed in fairytales.
"That's adorable! Fenris still makes puppy eyes at her!" Merrill said clasping her hands together. I frowned at her.
"I do not make puppy eyes!"
"What's puppy eyes?" Abby asked looking at us confused.
"Nothing to concern yourself with." I said continuing to frown at Merrill and Isabela as they laughed.
"Is it a grown-up thing?" Abby asked making a face.
"Yes." I replied grasping at anything to stop this line of questions.
She sighed heavily. "No one ever tells me anything." She grumbled crossing her little arms in a pout.
"She is far too cute. Oh, Abby when this is all over, I'm so going to tease you ruthlessly." Isabela laughed. "I got her more stuff. I put it in that empty chest there. If you need us, you know where to find me. Be good, angel." Isabela said with a smirk. Merrill followed after her leaving me alone with the ruffled and pigtailed miniature Abby.
"You wanna play?" She asked watching me.
"Play what?" I asked confused by what to do with her. What was I supposed to do with a child? Let alone Abby. I prayed they would get something out of the mage quickly. As much as I enjoyed being her protector, I wanted Abby back.
"We'll be the Rebels. We're fighting the evil Orlesians. You can be King Maric and I'll be the Hero of River Dane. Cept I'll be a princess rather than a general."
"You…want to be a princess?" I asked feeling as if maybe Isabela was right. Was Abby just playing at this? Was she testing us to see how far we would go with her act?
"I am a girl, Fenris! I don't want to be a creepy guy. I want to be the hero, but a girl hero." She said as if once again, I should have known this.
"A creepy guy?" I asked. I knew adult Abby didn't like Loghain and had celebrated the year anniversary of his death, but I wasn't sure why little Abby didn't.
"Yep. Saw him once. He has mean eyes." She nodded and then looked around worriedly. "Don't tell Mother. She told me that wasn't nice and he was a great hero."
"I won't." I promised and earned a smile from her.
She then climbed out of my lap and looked around. "Can we go out of the room now? We need something to use as swords. Can't be good army without swords."
"We could go out in the gardens, I suppose." I said. I hadn't been to the gardens since I had moved in. Abby had once and shook her head at the state of them. Merrill had set to work on them, but I quickly ran her off. I didn't want that blood mage anywhere near me.
"Come on!" She said grabbing my hand and dragging me along.
"You don't know where they are, Abby." I pointed out.
"Well, they sure aren't in here." She said with an eye roll that was so much like adult Abby that I had to cough hard to keep from laughing. Yes, teasing her about all this would be an enjoyable thing if we could only get Abby back. She looked around the house and then up at me as we made our way to the gardens. "Something happened to your house." She said glancing around.
"It's a long story." I hesitated.
"That's what adults say when they don't want to explain something." She sighed as I opened the door and showed her the garden. "Oh! I like this place. There will be lots of places to hide!" She smiled up at me. "I'm good at hiding. Mother says it's not fair to Carver and Bethany cause I'm older, but I think even if I was younger I would still be better than them. See the way that shadow moves?" She said pointing to a spot along the wall. I crouched down and nodded. She grinned at me. "Watch." She took off for the shadow, glanced back at me one last time, and with a giggle vanished from view.
I had wondered about her becoming a rogue. I knew her brother had been a warrior and her father and sister were mages. I had wondered if it was a rebellion thing on her or her brother's part. Or if she was just a natural like she seemed to be. And now I had my answer. She was just a natural.