From the Author's Mind
The editing continued into this Chapter where, after spelling the name Colette wrong as Collete, I decided the proper name was actually Collette. God I was dumb. It's also a sign of how old I am, I apparently had Math homework when I originally wrote this. Oh how time flies. I haven't had a math course in over three years…
The Real Chapter 4
The first week at Whitestone Prep finished as insanely as it started. In fact, the situation had gotten worse since almost three-quarters of the students in the school were now doing magic. Many sampled everything, though some, like Hermione and Genis, remained fiercely loyal to their own types and refused to intermix. And as for those who weren't able to do magic, all they could do was do their other assignments while their friends attempted not to blow up another building and learn their spells quickly and effectively.
Friday dawned bright, and, as usual, too early for those in the dormitories, with a few students finishing their homework, some doing their typical morning exercises, and a few preparing for Martial Arts class. In one of the guys' rooms, number 203, Genis was sitting at his desk, making final preparations for their English Speech. Lloyd snored in his bed, in a very uncomfortable-looking position. With only an hour until Social Study, Genis figured he'd better wake his friend up.
"Fireball," he said lazily, sending three fireballs towards the bed Lloyd was in. Lloyd awoke with a yelp, flying right out of bed and landing on a pile of books.
"Genis! What was that for?" he roared.
"We have class in an hour, and you still haven't finished your—"
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM
An explosion came from the floor above them, shaking the whole building so much that things fell and people were knocked around. Genis suddenly ended up under his desk, and Lloyd found himself hanging half out the broken window. They could hear muffled shouts and footsteps, but things quieted in a minute or two.
"That was weird," said Genis, picking up his English papers.
"I wonder what that explosion was…" Lloyd muttered.
There was a knock on the door. It opened to reveal Harry, Ron, and Neville, who were in the room next door. They all looked a little shaken-up, with Harry having broken glasses, Neville massaging his neck, and Ron having a huge cut on his chin, which was bleeding profusely.
"What happened to you guys?" asked Genis.
"That bang or whatever," said Harry, "A pile of books fell on my glasses."
"I got whiplash when I jumped," said Neville painfully.
"I was shaving," said Ron, wincing, "Bloody hell… why does it hurt so much?"
"Because you just sliced part of your chin off with a razor," said Hermione, who had appeared from almost nowhere to join them, "We might as well leave for class, it's a mess upstairs."
"What happened?" asked Neville.
"No idea. Sounded like Luna was playing with firecrackers again," said Hermione.
"No, she's out with the C.I.A. today," said Neville, "She won't be back until Careers."
"No fair! She gets to miss Math!" Lloyd whined.
"Oh, come on, Lloyd, Math isn't that bad," Genis scolded.
"Not when you're a know-it-all brat," Ron muttered.
"Ronald!" Hermione snapped, hitting the boy in the back of the head, "Apologize!"
"Why?" came the voice of Zelos, "It's the truth."
He walked by with a towel wrapped around him, a bar of soap and brush in one hand, his clothes in the other. Everyone stared at him, Hermione blushing slightly. He went to his room (one that he had shared with Zim until the latter decided to take a vacated room down the hall), and shut the door.
"I'm going to class," said Hermione. She Disappeareated without another word.
"Is it legal for us to do that?" asked Ron.
"Well, there is no age limit here," said Harry, "Let's go!"
"Alright!" Ron said, and both Disappearated as well, though Ron left behind a fingernail. Neville just sighed and walked away, massaging his neck as he went.
"Lloyd, did you finish the English stuff?" Genis asked, picking up the conversation where they had left off before the interruption.
"What? Oh, yeah, I read that book and stuff…" said Lloyd.
"Your speech?" Genis persisted
"Speech?" Lloyd asked, blankly.
"The one he assigned on the first day of school," said Genis through gritted teeth.
Lloyd's eyes got wide and he gasped. If he didn't have the assignment done, Kratos was going to kill him. Unfortunately, Lloyd had classes all day, right up to English. He was going to be hard-pressed to get a decent speech written by then.
"Help me!" he begged.
"Lloyd, I can't, I have extra credit to do for Raine..." said Genis.
"For what? Healing Magic?" Lloyd asked.
"Yes! In case you haven't noticed, which I doubt you have, I am having trouble in that class," Genis replied testily.
"Alright, alright, I'll just—" Lloyd began, but was cut off when the door opened.
Sheena was the one to open it this time. She smelled of burnt fabric, she had black soot, cuts, and bruises all over her body, and her clothing was smoldering slightly. She looked like she'd been through a plane crash, and then beaten by rabid squirrels with hockey-sticks.
"Sheena! What happened?" cried Genis.
"Colette blew up our room," said Sheena, flatly.
"How?" Lloyd asked.
"She and Girtrude were mixing a Potion of Increased Giddiness," explained Sheena, "I told her to wait for our first Potions Lesson today, but, no, she had to go ahead and mix one herself..."
"Are you alright?" asked Genis.
"Do I look alright to you?" hissed the ninja-girl, making Genis recoil, "And I feel worse than I look. The room's a mess, I'll be surprised if any of my stuff survived. Do you have any aspirin?"
"No, I used the last of it last night when Lloyd was snoring," Genis replied.
"I guess I'll go ask Zim, then. The wizards are gone, I can't find Dib, and I'll be damned if I'm asking Zelos for so much as an acupuncture needle…"
She stormed off as well. With one last glance at each other, Genis and Lloyd picked up their stuff and left for their first class of the day. The way this one had started, it would be a wonder if either would survive.
"CHILDREN!" Ms. Bitters' voice cut through the silence like a metal whip, "Your performance on this past test was horrible. Those of you with pet fish will find yourselves very sad this evening."
The class stared at her, blank expressions on their face. Girtrude, however, wailed and fled from the room, screaming something about a man named Sanchez. Zim didn't even glance at his little robot companion. This was the eighth class he'd run out of this week, and all he'd done so far was burn down one building, caused a water pipe to explode, and forced eight students to leave the school from various internal injuries.
"You may be able to redeem yourself with our next test," said Ms. Bitters, "Although, for many of you, it will seal your fate."
More silence greeted this powerful quote. She passed out the results, face-down. Only Genis, Hermione, and Presea had scored perfectly. A majority of the class had failed, and Lloyd had scored a grand total of sixteen percent. They exchanged gloomy looks while Ms. Bitters seemed to slither back to her desk.
"And we will now conclude our lesson with a wonderful announcement. Many of you remember the unfortunate fire at the beginning of this week," said Ms. Bitters, "This building housed many of your magic classes, as well as Health class and Art. You will be pleased to know that our builders have finished repairs, and you will be able to begin your serious studies in magic today."
There was cheering from this, since everyone had been looking forward to learning real magic. Besides Healing Magic, that is. Raine made the class far too challenging, and a little boring, to be honest. The prospect of having new teachers was very exciting to some, though many were worried about Potions and Traditional Magic, seeing as Snape hated almost everyone at the school already.
"And since I have all of you for Careers, you will be beginning a bi-weekly internship with your assigned partners. In other words, you will go into your fields, experience the jobs, and then do a report on what your day was like. Today, however, only Presea need go to her assigned job."
"What about Luna?" asked Neville.
"She's got the week off," said Ms. Bitters.
"And why not the rest of us?" asked Ginny.
"We don't have a mentor for Lloyd," said Ms. Bitters.
"You can't find a barber?" asked Genis.
"I'm not going to be a barber," said Lloyd stubbornly.
The computer flew out of the ceiling and landed on Lloyd's desk. It looked rather psychotic today, with a weird face on it, drooling a bit more. The spinning parts of eyes were blood red. It leaned over Lloyd, looking possessed. Everyone around him moved away.
"Oh! But you will! For I have seen it. IN YOUR DNA! There is no denying it!" roared the computer, "And now that I have your blood, I can forever feast upon your soul!"
"But… you don't have my blood," said Lloyd in a small voice.
"… oh crap," the computer said, and then retreated into the ceiling. A pipe fell down and landed on Lloyd's desk. The class was silent for the third time, and the bell rang soon after.
There was a note on the door of Raine's room when the group arrived. Math had been cancelled because Raine had to tend to the victims of the early morning blast in the dormitories. She left them a rather hefty assignment, so many people sat on the Grounds, working on that for about as much time as they would have been in class. At about nine-thirty, Girtrude came walking back across the grounds. Ginny, Sheena, and Tak were chatting animatedly and doing their homework in the far corner as she approached.
"Girtrude, what've you got there?" asked Ginny curiously when the robot-disguised-as-a-blonde-girl arrived.
"His name is Sanchez!" Girtrude cried happily, holding up a fishbowl with a rather angry-looking goldfish inside of it. He swam in circles, giving looks of death to all that laid eyes on him.
"Sanchez looks angry…" said Sheena.
"He's in the Witness Protection Program!" said Girtrude gleefully.
"Why?" asked Ginny.
"Um… because… he has… a… … …" Girtrude began, but seemed to doze off for a second, "HEY! CHIPMUNK GIRL! HAVE YOU MET SANCHEZ?"
Girtrude ran off with the fishbowl, chasing a young girl with crutches and a neck brace. She had obviously been hurt in the explosion. They disappeared around the corner, and the girls glanced at each other.
"I must go," said Presea, leaving her small group at about quarter-to-ten. Gaz grunted and continued to play her Game Slave 4, while Luna, who had recently joined them, smiled serenely and waved.
The small, pink-haired girl made her way to Building Two, where Ms. Bitters was instructing a different group on Social Study. She made her ways through the silent halls, her expression unchanging. When she finally reached Ms. Bitters' door, she knocked.
A person might have thought there were about eighty doors to unlock. Different clicks, grinds, and other assorted noises radiated from the doorway, which finally opened enough for Presea to fit through. Inside, the class stared blankly as Ms. Bitters finished her lecture.
"… and that's why you should have no faith in this myth called 'pensions.' They're tools, just like each of you," she said, which was followed by the bell, "Alright! Class is over! Carefully place your textpackets back in your bags, and leave. Those of you with paper cuts, feel free to take medical adhesive strips. Those of you with aneurisms, suffer in your imminent doom!"
A few students scurried to the front and peeled a few Band-Aids off. Six remained in their seats, absent looks on their faces. Ms. Bitters waited for the last of the students to leave, or be dragged out by their friends, before beckoning Presea to follow her from the room.
"Presea," said Ms. Bitters, "I have taught miserable future failures for much longer than you can ever conceive to live. In all my years, I have never met such a soulless person as you."
Presea didn't know whether to be complimented or insulted, so she just kept it safe and said nothing. They continued down the really long hallway, students scurrying away from them as they passed. Ms. Bitters moved ahead quickly, and walked to a blank wall.
"You may not repeat what you are about to say to anyone. Otherwise your organs will combust," warned the teacher.
"Yes…" Presea said, nodding taciturnly.
Ms. Bitters punched the wall and a door appeared. She entered, followed by Presea. They walked down another long, dark hallway, not speaking. Ms. Bitters did stop them every few hundred feet, disabling traps and other things that would impede their progress forward.
"You must now accept a fate that has been decided for you since you were born," said Ms. Bitters, "There's no escaping it. You will possess all the knowledge ever to be created, and you will pass it on in hopes that your words will make the world a better place. But don't hold your breath."
"Why?" asked Presea.
"When you know as much about the world as I do," said Ms. Bitters, "You'll understand."
"… Yes," said Presea.
They finally reached a door. Behind them, various things from mustard gas to guillotines, fire traps, spikes, and a few rabid boa constrictors vainly tried to reach the two intruders. Ms. Bitters removed a key from her pocket and opened the door. Inside, Presea froze.
The room was simply one gigantic tower. A staircase went up and around the entire room. The walls were completely covered by books, books of all sizes and shapes. On one small section of a wall, however, was about thirty small TVs with various shows and security cameras around the school on them. Ms. Bitters slunk towards the TVs and stared into one, which showed a few girls playing with a jump rope. She made a noise of disgust and moved back towards the center of the room. The only seating was two gigantic, brown, leather armchairs, which sat next to a roaring fire.
"In this room contains the books, videos, DVDs, and portable cassettes of anything, everything, and anything of everything. This is where you will learn all there is to learn about the world, and where all your faith in humanity will be destroyed."
"Oh…" Presea said, still unsure what to think.
"You may visit this room anytime you wish," said Ms. Bitters, "And the sooner you gain the knowledge, the sooner I can leave. Use the elevator."
"Why did we use the path if there was an elevator?" asked Presea.
"Because Vishnu demanded it," replied Ms. Bitters.
"Well," Kratos said when his students had assembled after lunch, "I'm happy to see you have reported promptly. This is good because I expect to here decent speeches from each and every one of you."
Lloyd sank very low into his seat at this announcement. Genis glared at him, but then turned his attention back to his teacher. A few other students showed signs of panic, either because they forgot to do their speech, or because they were terrified of public speaking. Most, however, looked prepared, resigned, and ready to go. Hermione shuffled her note cards, quivering all over. Neville quivered, pale and dead-looking. Tak and Gaz both wore signs of complete indifference. Harry and Ron glanced at each other, their speeches already half-forgotten. Kratos waited for volunteers.
"Fine. No one wants to go first. Mr. Potter, why don't you go first?" asked Kratos, resuming his seat behind the desk.
"Alright…" said Harry nervously. He moved to the front of the room and faced his class, "Um. Well, I'm Harry James Potter. Everyone says I look like my Dad, but with my Mum's eyes. Uh… um… I guess you could say I'm famous in the wizarding world, having survived the Dark Lord's curse and all. And I like Quidditch. Oh, and I'm marked for destruction, so you all better be careful around me. Thanks."
"Alright… Genis, you go next," said Kratos, writing a few notes down while a few people clapped for Harry.
"Yes, Mr. Aurion," said Genis, moving to the front of the roo next, "My name is Genis Sage. I'm a proud half-elf with magical abilities. When in class, I'm usually at the top."
"Until this year," Hermione muttered.
"In battle, I'm the one shooting the fireballs at everything. Nothing can stand against my magic. My friends are Lloyd, Colette, Sheena, Presea, and sometimes Zelos, when he doesn't call me a brat. My sister is Raine, and she's a little psychotic about ruins. But that's okay, she's very nice. We saved the world when the Cruxius decided to split it apart. And I got accepted to this school because of my outstanding grades. The end!"
"Thank you Genis, that was very… nice," said Kratos, "Gaz Membrane, would you care to go?"
"If I have to…" Gaz said, bad-temperedly. She left her Game Slave 4 on her desk and made her way to the front row. She glanced back at Iggins, who was trying to take the gaming system, and her eyes grew fire in them, "Touch it and suffer for eternity!"
Iggins jumped and fell out of his seat. Presea dropped a book on his head. Kratos sighed and put his head on his desk while Gaz picked a small piece of fabric on her sleeve and looked up at her classmates.
"I'm Gaz. I come from a place far from here, and I live with my stupid brother and my dad. I don't ask for much from society, just to leave me the heck alone so I can play a few video games. Normally, they comply, but when I'm I interrupted my wrath is unleashed and as some people in this room can tell you, my wrath beats anything you can come up with. So stay out of my way and we'll get along just fine."
Nobody clapped for this. A few people edged away from her. Dib looked embarrassed. Finally, Presea clapped a couple of times, and Luna joined in when she snapped out of her daydream. Gaz, unaffected by the lack of applause, resumed her seat and resumed her game, the volume on mute.
"I think we should hear from someone from Hogwarts…" Kratos said, "Tak?"
"Tak doesn't go to Hogwarts!" Zim and Dib cried at the same time.
"I suggest both of you remain quiet or face detention," said Kratos, and then, to Tak, "Go ahead."
"Thanks," said Tak, "My name's Tak. I'm a witch from London, England, and I've attended Hogwarts with the famous Harry Potter and his friends since their first day. I was sorted into Hufflepuff, where I learned quickly that hard-work and friendly attitudes pay off. I was unbeatable in Charms, Transfiguration, and Potions… except for Hermione, of course."
"She's really laying it on thick…" muttered Dib.
"And though I was disappointed about Hogwarts closing down, I certainly understand how the House Elves felt. I was a slave for most of my childhood, reduced to cleaning up trash because of a certain incident involving a power failure and a locked door. But, now that I'm free from that, I can pursue my intellectual tracks. I hope I can be helped, it's not easy having to deal with a slave-like childhood and have the ability to go on. Thank you."
Everyone clapped, cheered, and whistled. Zim twitched angrily, and Dib slammed his head on his desk. Tak smirked and took her seat, and Zelos immediately leaned in to discuss something with her.
"Zelos Wilder, you go," said Kratos, interrupting their chat.
"Uh, sure. Hey, Chief, do you think I can get set-up for my speech?" asked Zelos.
"I suppose. How long will it take?" asked Kratos.
"Only about ten minutes. I just need to find my background hunnies…" said Zelos.
"Background hunnies? Nevermind, I don't want to know. Just go," said Kratos.
"Thank you, sir!" said Zelos, gleefully rushing out the door.
"Girtrude, you go instead," said Kratos.
Girtrude walked to the front of the room. She clasped the fishbowl in her hands, knocked Dib out of his desk, and set the goldfish on that. Sanchez swam angrily around, teeth bared.
"Hi!" Gir squealed, "I'm Girtrude! And this is Sanchez. He's my bestest friend, and he's a fish. I like tacos, piggies, moosies, and I wrote a song once, but it got eaten by an armadillo. And then the armadillo and I became friends and then he got hit by a plane while we were playing in Master's base. Oh… I MISS YOU TAVARIUS!"
She collapsed into sobs and was carried back to her seat by Zim, who also drug Sanchez with him. A few people looked moved by the speech, and both Colette and Luna wiped a tear from their eyes. Kratos looked like he had a migraine and put his hand on his face, messing his hair up slightly.
"Since Zelos isn't back, I think you should go, Lloyd," said Kratos.
"Me?" Lloyd gasped, "But… Dad… I…"
"It's Mr. Aurion, Lloyd," said Kratos, "And I just ordered you to go, correct?"
"Yes," said Lloyd, looking like he was going to his own execution. He slumped as he assumed the front of the room. He felt himself turn red as he faced his classmates, each waiting patiently for their chance to speak. Lloyd gulped, glanced at Kratos, and entered his speech.
"Hi. My name is Lloyd Irving. And I… was born to a lady named Anna, and this is my father. I was abandoned, kinda, at youth, raised by a dwarf, and I played with wooden swords a lot. I still have them, look! See? That nick? That's where I hit Dad's stove and nearly burned our house down. Um… I like to fight monsters and stuff, and I saved the world with Genis and Colette, and the others helped a little. Uh… Um… I… hate the mayor of Iselia and people who can't accept people for the way they are. And that's all I can think of…"
"That's fine, Lloyd," said Kratos, though he sounded highly disappointed. Zelos re-entered the room when Lloyd sat down, and his new appearance made many people do double-takes.
"I'm ready, Mr. Aurion," said Zelos with a grin.
He was dressed in over-sized, baggy clothing. He had large, gold chains around his neck, and scantly-clad girls behind him, each goggling over his appearance. All the guys in the class (and many of the girls, minus Tak) looked completely terrified. It wasn't long before it was apparent that Zelos had written a rap song.
"Hit it, Delilah!" Zelos said, snapping his fingers. The lights went out and he was suddenly bathed in a spotlight of different colors, "Yo, the name is Zelos Wi-el-der. But all the ladies call me 'Sir.' My favorite sport is soc-ca, and I'm the Chosen of Tethe'-Alla! Don't get in a tizzy, tonight we'll be busy, and I'll have her back by Monday morn'!"
There was a silence broken by nothing after this. Zelos struck a pose and the lights came on. Tak whistled. Many looked like they'd had strokes. Kratos sat at his desk, and it looked like his entire world had just come crashing down. The fear and embarrassment in his eyes was transferred to his voice.
"The rest of you can go tomorrow…" he said, "I mean Monday. Just… go away… please…"
The class filed out, each looking traumatized. Zelos and his new fan club left, Tak following, in one direction, while the others went in the other direction. Hermione was hysterical about not being able to go, Sheena was hysterical about having to listen to Zelos' song, and Girtrude was hysterical because the song reminded him of Tavarius, and he sobbed all the way to Weapon Appreciation. However, a sign on the door said it was cancelled because Kratos was seeking psychological help, and everyone instead retreated to their dormitories to do homework, listen to music, or curl up into the fetal position and sob.
The next scheduled class for them was to be Divination (since Science and Technology Appreciation were cancelled due to Raine's Healing duties and Regal's kitchen-repair duties). However, Professor Trelawney had gone missing the day previous, and a search party had just left on horseback to find her, so they were to report to Health instead. Back in Building D again, the students took their seats via the lottery, which Ms. Bitters held with extreme displeasure.
"Welcome to Health Class," said Ms. Bitters, "This class is supposed to educate you on the various Health Issues that are currently taking over and dooming this planet. Most of this class will be about identifying terrible diseases, so any impure thoughts you may have had about this class will now be purged!"
A bolt of lightning came from nowhere and struck the front row, where Zelos was sitting. His hair singed and his skin blackened, he slumped backwards into his seat, looking both depressed and in-pain.
"Now, to start with, we need to partner you up for your first report," said Ms. Bitters, "You will be doing a three-page report on a disease of my choosing, and you will present it next week. I will be picking the partners."
"When next week?" asked Hermione, taking out a homework planner. Another lightning bolt struck the homework planner, and Hermione let out a yelp. Ms. Bitters stared at her a moment before returning to the class.
"We will start with plagues. Plagues that swept the planet and destroyed any hopes of peace and intelligence. Who can tell me about the Blue Death?" asked Ms. Bitters.
"Wasn't that the one in Europe with the rats…" began Ron.
"NO!" snarled Ms. Bitters. A third lightning bolt hit Ron squarely between the eyes, sending him flying backwards and into the wall. Ginny, who was sitting next to him, gave a disdainful look to her brother before raising her hand.
"It was a very different disease, one that caused much suffering among people around Fortunasburg, Womanhatten, Ocean Banks, and other big cities. It was spread by contact with infected toenails and 100 percent cotton fabrics."
"Correct," said Ms. Bitters, "Gold star for you!"
She chucked another star at Ginny. She ducked and it hit Ron in the face. Being unconscious already, however, he didn't feel anything.
"Your textpackets will tell you more about the Blue Death. But now I will assign your partners. My ruling is final, and any protests will be squashed," said Ms. Bitters.
"But isn't this country a democracy?" asked Genis. Like those before, he was hit by a lightning bolt, which set his clothes on fire. He swore, ran around in circles, and finally had to cast Spread on himself, which ended up slamming him against the roof and landing on top of Sheena. Her desk and chair collapsed and they lay in a pile of wood and metal.
"The partners are as follows… Zim and Tak," said Ms. Bitters. Zim was suddenly struck by hundreds of lightning bolts, and Tak grinned evilly.
"Sheena and Zelos!"
Sheena was struck because she snarled. Zelos was struck because un-pure thoughts were going through his brain again.
"Gaz and Dib!"
The Membrane siblings glared at each other, but Gaz held up her hand to block the lightning that came for her. Dib was fried.
"Hermione and Genis!"
The two magically-inclined persons also blocked the lightning with Protego and Force Field, respectively.
"Lloyd and Harry!"
Both boys were struck, Harry from rage and Lloyd for sheer stupidity.
"Presea and Iggins!"
Iggins was struck double the amount, since the room didn't seem to want to hurt Presea, yet still wanted to inflict her punishment since she was also filled with a rage.
"Ron and Girtrude!"
Ron was struck once more, getting jolted back into reality. Girtrude shrieked with glee when she was struck, and jumped around, begging for more. She got her wish, eighteen more times. Sanchez, who was now much blacker, floated in his bowl, dazed.
"Neville and Colette!"
Neither of them were struck by lightning. Both sighed in a relieved way, but Colette accidentally knocked her pencil off her desk. Lightning struck both of them, frying them from head-to-toe.
"Ginny and Luna!"
They were the only group not to get struck by lightning. Luna was in a daze already, and Ginny was ready to accept whatever came at her. Or maybe the room just admired her knowledge of the Blue Death. Regardless, the bell rang after this and the class filed out.
Girtrude got one more shock, as did Ron, who now resembled a burnt piece of toast more than anything. Even his hair had turned black. It was going to be a very long evening, with Potions and Symphonian Magic next. With sighs of despair, they moved to the basement, where Snape was sure to be waiting for them. What else could go wrong?
From the Author's Mind (June 2011)
So… yeah… continuing on with the editing. It's irritating that I just remembered that doesn't like to preserve the strikethroughs and other fun things I do on my fonts. Oh well. I think there's a way to fix that that I'm… far too lazy to deal with. Please continue to enjoy reading this story as I continue to enjoy re-reading it and hating myself for mistakes I made before!