Someone Like you

Disclaimer – I owe nothing but the ideas

My apologies for not updating sooner – real life rudely interrupted my writing.

. . .

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you, too,
Don't forget me, I beg,
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead,"
. . .

Stopping her car on the side of the road, JJ paused. She had practiced what she was going to say, over and over, in head on the journey, but still had no idea what she would truly say when facing him.

Hotch's blind faith in her ability to negotiate any situation, successful, had led to her being in some awkward situations, but never one that involved telling a friend that she had openly lied to him for ten years. She shuddered as she thought of the disappointment he would harbour. That she was about to shatter the trust he held in her. How could Hotch do this to her?

Making her way to his door, she took a deep breath and knocked. Praying that Sophie had gone along to the book club that Reid had mentioned she had joined. She needed Spencer alone.

Reid opened the door, looking shocked at seeing JJ on his doorstep.

"Is my phone not working? Have we got a case?"

"No Spence, can I come in?"

The grave tone in her voice worried him; he nodded and stepped aside, letting JJ past him.

Automatically she headed for the lounge.

Spencer indicated she should take a seat.

She did so, on the edge of the couch, aware of the concern in his eyes.

"How can I help, JJ? You look really worried about something. Is everything ok with Henry?"

"I'm fine Spencer, it's you, I mean the conversation we had earlier today. The one about Emily. I have something I need to tell you, but before I do I need you to promise me something, well a few things."

"How can I make promises I don't know that I can keep?"

"Please Spencer, it is important I wouldn't ask you if it wasn't."

"Because I trust you JJ I will agree, whatever it is."

His words slapped her, knowing that within moments he would have every reason never to trust her again.

"You have to promise that whatever you decide tonight, what I tell you will go no further. You cannot tell anyone what I am about to tell you. You also have to promise to listen to everything I have to say before you react, please. Lastly please try to remember I would never have done this if there was another option at the time."

"JJ I promise, but please tell me what on earth you are talking about."

JJ looked her friend directly in the eyes, her mouth dry. All the words she had rehearsed had flown from her mind. In the end she muttered;

"Emily's alive."

Spencer sat in stunned silence, staring right through JJ, into a place far beyond the room they sat in.

"She's alive Spence. She survived Doyle and was taken into hiding. It was a decision made way up the chain; there was no choice but to follow orders. When it was done everyone hoped it was a temporary measure, but it took longer to track down Doyle then anyone imagined," JJ wasn't sure he was listening to a word she was saying, but she couldn't cope with silence. "When Doyle was finally killed, Emily was given the chance to come home. She made the decision not to. That has now changed, she wants to see you Spence, she wants a chance to explain everything."

Slowly Spencer's eyes came back to rest on JJ, nothing had prepared her for the look of disgust they would contain. She leant forward, trying to take his hand, but he pulled away, standing and walking to the window, opening the drapes and watching the spot, the very spot he had seen her, sitting watching him.

JJ rose to stand by him.

"I'm sorry."

"For what, lying to us or getting caught out?"

His words cut through her, piercing her very heart. She turned away, unable to say anything to help his pain.

The atmosphere was unbearable, JJ considered leaving Spence to come to terms with what she had just told him, but she couldn't abandon him like that. So she patiently waited for him to accept what she had just told him. She had seen enough people in shock in her career to last a life time. JJ was good a judging when to push and when to back off. Now she needed to take that step back.

All too soon she heard the sound of a key in the front door, damn she silently cursed, making her way to the hall to greet Sophie.

"Hi JJ," she smiled as she saw her in the hall, "Everything OK?"

"Sophie, I have had to tell Spencer something tonight, that I never wanted to have to tell him, he's taken it really badly and I don't want to leave until he speaks to me. I need some answers from him."

"What are you talking about JJ? What could you tell him that would upset him?"

"Sophie, Emily is alive and she has come back and wants to speak to Spencer."

JJ had known deep down that Spencer would never lie to Sophie and he would have told her, the way she told Will. She had to trust her to understand and keep the same promises as Spencer.

"What? Where is he?"

JJ indicated the lounge.

Sophie shot through to Spencer, drawing him into a huge hug.

Spencer accepted her warmth.

Sophie glared at JJ over his shoulder.

"I think you should leave," Sophie spoke, low and calm, "now."

"Please listen to me, we need to talk about this, we cannot just ignore it and hope it will go away."

"Go," Sophie spat.

"Spencer, please listen, remember what you promised. It has to be kept secret," JJ added desperately.

"Leave us," Sophie's tone was increasingly defensive.

JJ turned to leave, looking over her shoulder at the couple by the window.

Spencer watched JJ leave.

He couldn't believe she had lied all this time. That she had walked into a room of her friends and openly told them Emily was dead. She cried with him, holding him back, no wonder he couldn't go and say goodbye. He thought of how she had grieved, as the team buried an empty coffin, and how many times she had sat reminiscing with everyone. All the time knowing the truth and keeping it from them. Letting each one of the team suffer and doing nothing to ease that pain.

All this time one of the few people in this world that he trusted without doubt had deceived him for ten years.

He held onto Sophie, with his world turning upside, she was the only stable force in his life. Her soothing touch rubbing his lower back, he knew she would listen when he was ready, but right now he didn't want to talk.

Spencer didn't know which he was struggling with more; knowing Emily was alive or knowing his best friend could lie repeatedly to him.

. . .

I hope that has made up for taking so long – will try and get another chapter up at the weekend, but I hate to say it I don't think the mood is going to lift any time soon.