Someone Like You

Disclaimer – I own nothing but the ideas.

So we are getting close to the end – one more chapter and possibly an epilogue. I would like to give a special thank you to those who have reviewed, alerted or favourited.

. . . . . . .

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you,
Don't forget me, I beg,
I remember you said,
"Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead,"

. . . . . . .

Spencer didn't know what had led him back to the same spot he had stood in, barely a week ago, and had first seen Emily. As he stood looking at her grave, he realised that not one of his questions had been answered; in fact, he now had even more. In addition to that, he now shared the burden of keeping a secret from his friends.

Spencer didn't like secrets. Hiding the secret of Riley Jenkins death had tore apart his family, and Emily's secret undercover life had affected his BAU family. Secrets led to problems, deception, lies and then loss. He hated secrets!

Crouching down, to tidy the roses he had laid down the week before, he became aware of someone close by. Standing he turned to see Emily standing by the same tree he had seen her hiding behind before. She was leaning against it, a hesitant look on her face, and he could swear a tear on her cheek.

Neither said anything.

After a while Emily stood upright and walked slowly towards Spencer. For the briefest of seconds he considered running, but really, that wasn't an option. It never was to Spencer. Instead he stayed there, watching her take the tentative steps towards him.

It was then that it truly hit him how fragile she had become. He couldn't help but wonder if the loss of weight was a complication of her injury or purely the stressful lifestyle she was living. She didn't look like she had slept in a long time, and she definitely wasn't looking after herself the way she use to. The Emily Prentiss he knew was immaculate in her presentation, but the person in front of him didn't seem to care about anything so frivolous. He'd put money on the fact that, if he could see her hands, her nails would be practically none existent.

As she drew close, Spencer closed his eyes, breathing deeply, he realised no matter what had changed, she still smelt of Emily. That familiar musky perfume he had always liked. The deep scent always seemed to suit her.

Opening his eyes, he looked into her dark listless orbs. Slowly he wiped away a tear that had just started its way down her already tear stained cheek.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

Emily shook her head, attempting a half smile at her friend.

"It's me who is sorry. I did everything wrong, I see that now. But at the time I thought I was doing what was best."

"I know that," Spencer said softly, "We all know Doyle was presenting as a family annihilator. You did what you did to protect your family, us. The problem was that you never gave us the chance to protect you. We could have done Emily, we could have protected you, I believe that."

Emily's head dropped.

"I know you could have, I've no doubt. But I couldn't live with any of you getting hurt. Doyle's men had already fired on Derek, they could have killed him!"

"But they didn't."

Emily looked up at Spencer. She could see the desperation in his eyes. She knew he wanted her to explain, to satisfy his curiosity, but she didn't know if what she had to say would clear his mind.

"I made a deal with Doyle. I met him and he made it clear that he knew where you all lived and that he was capable of killing any of you at any time."

"Then you should have told us, Emily," his anger threatened to return.

"He was having you followed. He agreed to leave you all alone if I kept you out of what was going on. I couldn't tell you without putting you in danger," her voice pleaded for his understanding, "I did it to keep you safe, it was the only way I could protect you all equally. I knew what he was capable of. The day he shot at Derek I knew he realised you were now involved."

"So you should have told us then."

"By then it was too late. I had already started to lie to you, to cover myself. I could only see one way out, and I took it."

"So you walked away," the bitterness was evident in Spencer's voice, "You just left, without saying a word. Facing Doyle was less frightening then facing your friends! What did you think we were going to do?"

"I don't know. I was ashamed and unable to explain. I just needed to know you were safe," Emily struggled to explain, "As he killed one after another, I knew he was getting closer to my turn. I had to find him, before he found me. I was sure I could do it, I thought I could defeat him."

"Did you not think that we would find it all out and follow you? Your information could have helped us find him quicker. In protecting us you put us at risk."

"How do you work that out?" Emily snapped.

"We came after you, Emily. We came to find you, on the information we had. You had so much more detail that could have helped us. Lack of information wasn't going to stop us looking for you; we were determined to get to you, Emily, especially after we saw Doyle capture you."

"I never asked you to do that."

"You didn't need to ask, Emily, you meant that much to us that we did it without thinking. You may have abandoned us, but we weren't willing to abandon you."

Spencer's words stung Emily. She stood in silence, tears rolling down her cheeks.

Spencer hated to see her like this; he didn't want to upset her. Slowly he pulled her toward him, hugging her close. He smoothed her long hair as she sobbed on his shoulder.

"I should never have come back," Emily whispered, "I can't get anything right."

Giving her shoulders a squeeze, Spencer smiled.

"I never said that."

Emily looked up at him, suspiciously.

"I never said you shouldn't have come back. I understand why you did what you did, but I still can't forgive you, not yet, I'm not ready, maybe one day. However you are my friend, one of the good things about an eidetic memory is you don't forget all of the good memories, either. Right now Emily you need a friend, I can see that. You and JJ have dragged me into this secret, so now you can't keep me at arm's length. Sophie told me I should talk to you; I think she is hoping it will be the end of moping round the house once a year. I have a lot more questions that I expect honest answers to, but hopefully talking will help you too."

"I don't deserve you Dr Spencer Reid."

He pulled her tight again.

"There is one condition," he paused, waiting for her to look up, "I will only keep your secret for one month. Then we tell the others."

He saw the fear in her eyes, bringing them to life for the first time.

"I can't," she stuttered.

"We can," he affirmed, "No matter what I have felt since I have found out you are alive, one thing has over ridden every other emotion, Emily. The relief of knowing you are safe. It will be the same for everyone else. It is the one thing we all prayed for while we waiting together during your operation. It's just taken longer than we hoped for that prayer to be answered."

"I can't face everyone."

"You can with support from JJ, Hotch and me. We'll be there with you. It won't be easy, but it will be worth it in the end."

. . . . . . .

My muse keeps changing my mind on the end for this, but I think this chapter has finally set the course. More as soon as I can.