Happy Birthday, I Love You
Disclaimer: I don't own jack-shit.
Warning: There's a lot of crap. So watch out!
As soon as forever is through...
God Alfred feels terrible, but its not his fault! It's Mattie's fault for being so uncool! Maybe if he wasn't so girly looking and more noticeable then maybe Alfreds friends wouldn't bully him so much at school! Then Alfred wouldn't have to pretend like they aren't related and have to hurt him too! (even if it kills him to see those tears fall on Matthews beautiful face and the bruises on his body) Side's, if his little brother Mattie's birthday wasn't on July 1st, then maybe he could hang out with him! But noooo his birthday just had to be when Arthur and Gilbert and the rest of his friends wanted to hang! (even though all he wants to do is spend his time with sweet little Mattie even if his heart broke when he saw the betrayal and sadness in his violet pools he dared called eyes) Besides, he's the hero! He can't be wrong!Gilbert, who has been suspiciously quiet and thoughtful looking finally spoke up.
"You know Matthew Williams? I think we should stop harassing him." (Yes yes yes yes yes!)
"Why would you decide that now you git?" (Shut your ugly mouth you tea sucking ass-hole!)
Gilbert smirks before replying, "Because the little Birdie is so cute, I'm gonna ask him out." (No no no mine mine MINE)
"Bloody wanker, you just want his arse, but whatever. At least I can have time alone with Alfie now", the British boy says, wrapping his arm around Alfreds waist and pulling him close, not noticing Alfreds shudder of disgust. As Gilbert and his remaining friends bid the pair farewell, smirks and knowing looks on their faces, Arthur steers Alfred towards the smaller boys house, pushes Alfred inside, and attacks his lips. (Pretend its not chapped thin lips, but soft pink full lips. Pretend its not green staring at you with lust but violet. Pretend its not a slightly over weight body your running your hands over but a slender, almost feminine body. Pretend its not British curses being moaned out but soft, angelic moans. Imagine its not Arthur your thrusting into, but your dear sweet Mattie.) Afterwards he takes a scalding hot shower and leaves, trying to forget his evening with Arthur and rushes home, hoping to see Mattie.
Alfred burst through the door and notices two things. One, his parents aren't home, and two, Mattie is home, alone on the couch, with his eyes closed.
"Hey buddy, where's mom and dad?"
"They forgot."
Shit. Their parents had always favoured and paid more attention to Alfred, and sometimes forgot about Matthew, but never on his birthday. He wants to comfort Mattie, wants to hug him and tell him its okay, but the words that tumble out are anything but.
"It's your own fault. Maybe if you were more noticeable, people would care about you." (NO NO NO!)
"Is that so?" Matthew whispers, his voice cracking, making Alfred want to shoot himself in the head.
"Isn't obvious? Nobody loves you, not even our parents." (MATTIE DON'T LISTEN TO ME I DON'T MEAN IT IT'S NOT TRUE!)
"So...does that mean you don't love me either?" Matthew's voice continues cracking, just like Alfreds heart.
"I couldn't care less if a car hit you and you died." ( NO IT'S NOT TRUE I LOVE YOU WHY AM I SAYING THESE THINGS?)
After a minute of silence, Matthew finally opens his eyes, which reveal dull violet orbs, devoid of emotion. It sends chills down Alfreds spine. No matter what he has done to Matthew, his eyes have always had that bright light in them. Alfred can hear his heart crumbling and his head screaming at him to apologize, to beg for his forgiveness, to kiss him, and hold him, but he just can't make his body move, can't make his mouth say those things.
Matthew suddenly runs out of the house, not even bothering to grab his shoes. Alfred just shrugs and turns the TV on, ignoring the voice in his head screaming to go after him. Suddenly, he hears a crash outside and he rushes to his window to see whats going on. What he sees horrifies him. His beautiful little Mattie's mangled, broken body in a heap in the street, a car speeding away down the street. Alfred rushes out and holds Matthew, bleeding all over his favourite bomber jacket, but he can't find it in himself to care. All he cares about his his little Mattie, who's getting weaker by the second.
After what seems like a century, Matthew opens his mouth and manages to whisper out a single sentence that tears Alfreds heart right out of his chest.
"I'm sorry...that I couldn't have been...a better brother."
Alfred just can't do anything. It's like his body shut down. It stays this way until Matthew grows limp in his arms and is no longer breathing. Finally, Alfred screams.
"MATTIE! I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I LOVE YOU! I'LL DO ANYTHING, PLEASE JUST DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE!"
Alfred continues sobbing, even as the paramedics take Matthew away and his parents lead him towards his house. Alfred doesn't bother picking up his ripped out heart from the streets, it's not like he needs it anyways,right?
Five years later
Alfred, now 21, turning 22 in three days, wakes up at 8:00AM today. He spends the whole day cleaning his small, dingy apartment, skating at the ice rink, and baking a maple flavoured cake. Things he should have done 5 years ago. As he lights the candles and blows them out, he stares at a photograph. It's of him and Matthew, before he started pretending Matthew didn't exist. His violet eyes and shy smile still take his breath away. As his tears falls, he whispers the sentence he should have said years ago.
"Happy Birthday Mattie, I love you."
...I will finally stop loving you.
AN: God I feel horrible... Anyways, I hope you liked it! This is for Canada day! I know its early, but i'm gonna add another fic on Canada Day anyways! Happy Early Canada Day!
Ciao!
~Me