Breathe Anew
Hoped
Okay, I usually update things in order, but I was not in the mood to update FA so I decided to give you all a bit of BA.
Also, there will be 21 chapters in the end. This chapter was supposed to be chapter 17, but when I was looking at my notes, it didn't make any sense to have this chapter later so it got shifted.
The FST (fan made soundtrack) will be available at the same time as the last chapter.
Characters: Matthew, Gilbert
Disclaimer: I have nothing to say in my defence.
Breathe Anew
Hoped
Over the following month, the weather started to change for the better and with it, Gilbert's mood seemed to make a switch for the best as well. Matthew was still with Valerie, but for reasons unknown, he wasn't as upset about it.
It was a bright Wednesday afternoon and Gilbert got home early from work. The spring air was doing wonders for his morale and he was enjoying a good book in the living room, with the sun warming his body, when he heard the door open and close. He put his book down and checked his watch. He noticed that it was the time which Matthew usually got home. He was about to get up and greet his "friend", but Matthew came to see him instead.
Immediately, Gilbert noticed that something was different about the blonde. There was something in his eyes that hadn't been there that morning.
"Hey, you okay?" Matthew slipped into the room and sat down next to Gilbert.
"I have to talk to you." Gilbert gulped, feeling uneasy. Those words didn't sound encouraging. Nevertheless, Gilbert nodded his head, encouraging the younger man to talk.
"I… what I mean to say is, why didn't you tell me?" Gilbert was expecting many things, but this was not one of them.
"What?"
"Why didn't you tell me we were once lovers? Why didn't anyone tell me that we stopped being friends a long time ago, because we were dating? Why didn't you tell me?" Gilbert looked at Matthew and searched for words. He never saw such betrayal expressed in those violet eyes.
"I'm sorry… I was just following orders. They didn't want me to tell you or else I would have." He leaned against the couch and then sat up straight as the conversation replayed in his mind. He looked at the man besides him.
"Who, who told you this? Do, does this…?" He tried to decipher Matthew's expression, but the other man's face was blank.
"You're an incredible person, Gilbert Beilschmidt. I am truly lucky to have you in my life. I'm sorry for the hell you've been through these past months." And before he could say anything, before he could even formulate a question in his mind, Matthew closed the distance between them and his lips claimed Gilbert's own.
At first, the older man was too shocked to respond, but Matthew was quick to coax him out of his stupor and soon, Gilbert had his arms around Matthew's shoulders and started pushing Matthew down on the couch.
When they broke away momentarily to catch their breaths, he looked into Matthew's eyes and recognized those emotions from long ago, the same emotions he thought would never again be directed at him from behind those glasses. He had to make sure.
"Where did we go on vacation two years ago?" He asked. Matthew brought a hand to his face and caressed his cheek tenderly. Gilbert pressed his face deeper into that warm palm.
"We went to Germany. You brought me to meet your parents. Your mother showed me baby pictures of you and you got all flustered about it, even though you kept saying you were an awesome baby." Gilbert remained silent as he felt himself well up with emotions. He was back. Matthew had returned to him after so many months of anguish, after suffering through insult and injury, Matthew remembered him.
"Welcome back." He simply whispered, not trusting himself with any other words. Matthew smiled at him, kissing him once more. This time Gilbert did not hold back as he let his hands roam free, reacquainting themselves with Matthew's body.
They quickly progressed to remove each other's clothes, until Matthew was lying naked underneath Gilbert and the older man had to do his best to hold back his tears of gratitude and amazement that this was actually really happening.
As much as Gilbert wanted to take Matthew as he had in the past, as much as his body was begging him to go ahead and continue, he was in such an emotional state that he simply buried his face in Matthew's shoulder and wept.
Matthew was startled at first by the sudden change in pace, but he was quick to hold his lover in his arms and simply let him empty himself of all these repressed emotions.
Gilbert held on tightly to the younger man, almost as if afraid that Matthew would vanish from his grasp and occasionally, fragmented sentences in broken English and clipped German would get past his lips.
This lasted a good five minutes before the older of the two finally gained control of his emotions and remained silent as he hummed the scent of Matthew's skin that was uniquely his own. Matthew stroked his hair and back until he judged that Gilbert was sufficiently calmed down.
"Allow me to alleviate your pain." He whispered to him. Gilbert didn't understand at first, but Matthew gently switched their positions so that he was on top of him and Gilbert nodded his head.
Matthew was as loving as always, making sure not to brusque Gilbert. It was slow, it was sensual, filled with gentle touches and warm kisses, whispered loving words and a reassured feeling that he was back and that the nightmare was behind them, a thing of the past, over.
Gilbert couldn't remember the last time he genuinely felt so serene in the last several months, but he had to say that right now, lying close, snuggled to Matthew under a warm blanket with the sun setting outside, he was pretty sure this was that moment, or at least, one of them. He felt Matthew shift in his lose embrace and he tilted his head to look at his lover. They exchanged a brief kiss and a smile before Matthew's hand was caressing his cheek once more.
"You know I love you, right?" Gilbert nodded and kissed his forehead, as if to confirm the words.
"Then wait for me. Wait for me a little longer and I'll return." With a final kiss and a warm look, Gilbert didn't even have the chance to say a thing, as everything went black and he found himself lying on his bed.
It was Thursday morning and it had all been a dream; a trick of his mind, a wish from his heart.
OWARI 13
TO BE CONTINUED
Ha, ahahahahahah, go ahead, lay into me! It was too good to be true! And P totally called it three paragraphs in LOL. She knows me too well.
I do accept anonymous reviews.
Started writing: September 18th 2010, 8:49pm
Finished writing: September 18th 2010, 9:56pm
Started typing: September 24th 2010, 9:26pm
Finished typing: September 24th 2010, 10:06pm