A/N: I want to thank algonquinrt and siouxchef for both helping me with parts of this chapter and siouxchef gets extra thanks for her beta skills. Also to my gay bf, I 3 you.
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Jasper was still panting, catching his breath and I laid still, smiling.
Several minutes of silence passed before he spoke. "Edward?"
"Hmm?"
"I can't wait to see you tomorrow."
EPOV
"I can't wait to see you either," I smiled. "What time do you want to get together tomorrow?"
He hummed softly and yawned before answering me. "I have no late appointments, so how about six?"
"Six sounds good. Get some rest. I'll see you tomorrow, Jasper."
"G'night, Edward."
I pressed end and laid quietly for a moment before getting up. My clothes had been thrown around the room, so I picked them up and put them in the hamper. After I had my work clothes out for the next day, I made myself a sandwich for dinner, called Alice, then watched a little TV. Once I settled into bed for the night, I slept very soundly, probably due in no small part to my late night call to Jasper.
The next morning I did my usual workout, then showered and got ready for work. I knotted my blue paisley silk tie as I thought about my workday ahead. I wanted to sneak away and talk to Bella at some point, having heard plenty of details about how things were progressing from Alice the night before.
Once I got to work, I spent my morning researching the cases Bella had given me. I traded a few emails with Alice, and around lunch time, I decided to see if Bella could do lunch. She looked stressed so I was glad I'd taken a break to chat for a bit, and was even more glad when she agreed to lunch.
We talked about Alice, Adam, and Jasper at lunch. I was surprised how I found myself opening up to her, telling her things I hadn't even told Jasper yet, but I knew I could trust her. I felt terrible when she slipped and told me about Jasper and his bedroom rule, but I could already tell he had his defenses up. We talked about Emmett and if I knew Alice at all, she would be conspiring to get Rose into his life somehow. I liked Rose, I just wanted her to go in with open eyes about Emmett.
After lunch, we walked back to the office and I got a little more work done and talked to Alice via email. I filled her in on the details of my lunch and we talked about Jasper as well. Alice wasn't sure if she wanted to have Bella's party at Bella's or Jasper's and went on about every last detail to me. It was sweet, but I had better ways to waste my afternoon.
I stopped by Bella's office to say goodbye before I left for my date with Jasper. I wanted to thank her again for lunch and chat a little about the upcoming birthday bash Alice was planning.
I smiled as I watched her at her desk from my spot against the door frame. I cleared my throat softly to get her attention and she looked up. When she smiled at me, I could see what Alice saw in her; she was beautiful, even I could appreciate it.
"I'm off for the night," I said.
"Ah, on your way to Jasper's?"
"Yep. I talked to Rose on my way over and gave her the address for Sunday. I'm going to assume that Alice has told you, or will tell you soon, where my parents live. Did you guys get your date worked out?"
"I'm waiting for her to write me back, actually. I have to work late tonight, then I volunteer with Jasper tomorrow, if he's still talking to me." She sighed and looked at her computer. "I sent her some tulips earlier with a short poem on the card.. too cheesy?" Bella buried her head in her hands then and I couldn't help but laugh. It was cute to watch her so in love and clueless.
"Which poem?"
"Part of Marge Piercy's 'One Plus One'," she mumbled from between her hands. I waited for her to tell me which part, moving my hand in that 'go on' motion. She spoke softly, once she began.
One plus one equal one, unknowable except
in the moment, not convertible into words,
not explicable or philosophically interesting.
But it is. And it is. And it is. Amen.
"I think she'll love it," I said honestly. "She's having the best time planning your birthday party, you know. I hope she doesn't go too overboard, but a little overboard is to be expected. I'm very glad to see her happy again."
My mouth wanted to keep going, keep spewing information about Alice. Maybe I felt bad for Bella's confession about Jasper earlier and wanted to trade secrets, or maybe I just wanted Bella to understand more of Alice. There was always so much more to people once you got below the upper layer, but Alice? Alice had tucked herself so far away that I could only hope someone would have the patience to dig deep enough someday. She did a good enough job getting through the day-to-day with her happy face on, but there were still certain times of the year that she would camp out at my house and I could feel the pain radiating from her.
"I'm trying to keep her from going too far. I really hate my birthday, but she was just too cute to resist," Bella said, laughing. "Have a good night with Jasper. He hasn't replied to my email yet. I may give him a call in a bit to apologize again."
"Don't worry too much. You didn't mean to hurt him, it just slipped out. I'm sure he'll understand."
Bella huffed and I gave a little wave on my way out. I stopped at the State Liquor Store, cursing Utah and its backwards laws while I was there, to grab a bottle of red.
As I drove to Jasper's, I wondered what we'd be doing the whole night. I had no idea what we were going to cook, nor the movie we would watch; I'd left it entirely up to him.
I pulled in to his driveway and smiled as I got out of the car. After I rang the doorbell, I waited patiently as I looked around. When the large door opened, I saw Jasper and smiled again. He had no shirt on, a dishtowel over his shoulder, and his jeans hung low on his hips; I wanted to take him right there.
We could eat dinner after, right?
He smiled and stepped back so I could walk inside. "Edward..."
Once I was in the foyer, I handed Jasper the bottle of wine, licked my lips, and pressed him against the wall. I heard the door close and brought my hands up to either side of Jasper's face, tilting his head slightly before slipping my tongue into his mouth. There was no battle of wills, no contest, nothing but an exchange of lust.
Jasper moaned against me, wrapping his arms underneath my jackets and around my waist, bottle still in hand; I could feel the cold glass through the thin material of my shirt. He broke the kiss first with a small gasp, leaning his head against the wall, and I moved back slightly.
As he spoke, he brought his empty hand up to my tie and ran it along the cool material. "Fuck, you are welcome to come over every night if that's the sort of greeting I'm going to get."
"Be careful what you say," I breathed.
He tugged gently on the tie and brought my lips back to his before running his hand through my hair. I smiled against his lips at the thought that I might actually greet this man every night and then the sheer ridiculousness that I was even having that thought so early in our... whatever... this was.
I pulled Jasper's lower lip between my teeth and pressed against his body again, this time letting my hands move around his bare torso and down to the waistband of his jeans. I tucked my fingers underneath the denim at the dip of his back and pulled him into me. As I pushed forward, my hands were smashed against the wall painfully, but it didn't matter; all that mattered was getting as close as possible to the fucking gorgeous man in front of me.
His hand came back around to my chest and he pushed me away softly. As I opened my eyes, I saw reluctance and hesitation on his face.
"Dinner," he said. "Come on."
Jasper's hand slipped down into mine as he led me into the kitchen. I took off my outer jacket and suit jacket and set them on the table before washing my hands.
"I've got a chicken roasting in the oven with potatoes. I just need to wash this zucchini and get it going on another rack."
"Ah, do you need any help? Dessert?" I raised an eyebrow and Jasper blushed the slightest tint of pink.
"I picked something up, actually. And nope, no help needed.. everything is almost done. Oh, actually, why don't you open the wine?"
We made our way around the kitchen together and once I'd poured us each a glass of wine, I sat and watched him work, putting the vegetables into the oven and checking on everything periodically. We talked about our days and I brought up lunch with Bella and how she said she was going to email him. He mentioned that he hadn't had time to check his email all afternoon, but grabbed his iPhone before I had a chance to stop him and explain.
I saw the hurt creep over his normally beautiful features as he tapped the surface of his phone, then held it to his ear.
There was a moment of silence before I faintly heard a female voice.
"You what?" Jasper shouted into the phone. There was a moment of silence and then he spoke again. "You had no right. No fucking right at all, Bella. We'll talk more about this later."
He took the phone from his ear, pressed a button, and set it on the counter. Both of his hands gripped the edge of the polished stone. His legs were flexed and his torso bent over, head down.
I moved to rest a hand on his back. I wanted to reassure and comfort him. I traced my hand up and down slowly.
"Jasper..."
"Edward, don't." His tone was hard and cold, something I hadn't yet experienced from him. "Please."
"Jasper, I know you're hurt right now. I get that, I understand. But Bella didn't say what she said out of hate or anger. It just slipped out in conversation. She would never hurt you intentionally, and you know it."
He looked up at me and the anger sparkled in his eyes. "Why are you defending her?"
"I'm defending her because she's your best friend and she loves you. She made a mistake and she feels horrible. I'm sure you feel hurt too. I can't imagine that it was something you wanted me to know about just yet, but really, it doesn't bother me."
Jasper let go of the counter and straightened his back to stand. He shifted and moved away from my hand which had remained on his back.
"Edward, what do you mean it doesn't bother you?" he said, still seething with anger.
"Jasper," I sighed. "We all have problems, issues, quirks. You of all people should know this. Did you really think I didn't notice yesterday when we went to the guest room again instead of your bedroom? I'm not that fucking clueless, you know."
"I-I know, I just..."
His face crumpled and he briefly looked like a lost little boy. I decided that perhaps it was time to trade secrets.
"Jasper, turn the oven off. Dinner will stay warm, let's go talk."
He touched a few buttons on the sleek stainless oven and led me out to the living room. Instead of laying how we had the previous night, we sat separately – Jasper on the couch and me in the armchair. We spent the next hour talking about Adam as I spilled the details of our entire relationship. Every moment, from the first time I met Adam, until the very last time I said goodbye to Seattle, poured out of me.
Jasper listened carefully and when I was clearly finished, he stood up and walked over to me. The worry bubbled up inside meas I wondered what the fuck he was doing.
He climbed over the top of the armrests and sat in my lap, albeit clumsily. His hands moved to either side of my face and he looked into my eyes as he spoke.
"Edward, I'm so sorry that happened to you."
I let out an audible sigh as he softly kissed my forehead, then down my nose to my lips. Unlike our kiss at the front door, this was slow and soft; a build-up and tease of what was to come next. Jasper's mouth slowed then stopped completely. His lips rested on the side of my mouth, his nose skimming up and down against mine as he caught his breath again.
"I'm such an idiot. I'm sorry," he whispered.
"What are you sorry for?"
"I'm sorry that you got hurt. I'm sorry that I ever thought this would be easy. I'm sorry that I'm not a better man for you. Mostly, I'm sorry that I held on to a stupid fucking fantasy for so long."
I suspected that he meant his love for Bella, but the side of me that was ready to fall madly in love with Jasper needed to hear him say and admit it out loud.
"You had nothing to do with me being hurt, but I do appreciate the sentiment. Relationships are never easy. You're a good man, Jasper – look at everything you do for everyone. I don't quite get that last part, though. Care to explain?"
His forehead was up against mine and I watched as he screwed his eyes closed as tightly as he could.
"I wasted all of these years being in love with her," he said quietly. "No, actually, thinking I was in love with her. Then you came along and now I know: that was never love. Not the way it should have been, anyway. The way it should be."
He opened his eyes toward the end of his words and I stared into the beautiful blue depths.
"Let's go eat and we can talk more later, okay? Maybe we'll skip our movie."
We sat and kissed for a few more minutes and I knew it was now or never; we were either going to go into the kitchen and eat while we talked, which was probably a better long-term plan, or we were headed straight for a room and zero clothes. I slowed our kiss and then backed away, helping Jasper off the chair.
We walked to the kitchen holding hands. He got the food from the oven and pointed me to the cabinet with the plates and such. Once we had served ourselves, we sat and fed each other as we ate, laughing and sharing stories. We were too stuffed for dessert and decided to save it for later. After.
We washed the dishes together and set them to dry, wiping our hands on the towel. Jasper took my hand in his and led me to the hallway with a sultry grin. When we were outside the guest bedroom, I paused, thinking Jasper was going to stop there, but he kept going.
As he opened the door to his room, I was surprised; it wasn't spotless, but it wasn't a complete pigsty. It was tidy and fresh, nicely decorated. Jasper's gym bag was slung in the corner and what I could see of the bathroom made it clear he hadn't intended to bring company in that evening, and it comforted me. I wanted to see this side of Jasper. Not just the clean and shiny side he showed me, but the real side. The real Jasper.
He turned to me and began to loosen my tie. His fingers were working to undo the knot and the anticipation was almost killing me. I wasn't sure what we were going to do, how far we would go, and I liked it. For that moment, I was just there with Jasper and we were doing what felt right.
The tie came undone and it slipped slowly from around my neck. He was teasing me and I intended to enjoy every last minute of it. As the fabric moved against my skin, he pulled one last time and kissed me hard. The tie finally left my neck and Jasper began to undo the buttons on my shirt. As each button fell open and new skin was exposed, he would lick, kiss, suck or bite it.
My hands moved to the button of his jeans and I had them undone quickly, before he reached the hem of my now untucked shirt. My belt came off next, the metal pieces clanking against each other and finally dropping to the floor with a thud. I bent to remove Jasper's jeans, my hands running along his toned legs the entire way. As he stepped out of them, I lifted my gaze back up and had the perfect view of his already hard cock. As I lifted myself, I made sure to breathe over him and gently scrape my teeth along the fabric of his boxer briefs.
A soft groan came from his lips as I wove my hands behind his neck and through his hair. I tugged and felt the vibrations from his chest again as his hands went back to fumbling with my pants. Once they were undone, he let them fall to the ground and I stepped out, toeing off my shoes in the process, and we fell to the bed in a heap.
"Edward," he moaned and rolled above me, hips flush with me. I could feel he wanted it as much as I did, but that wasn't how I wanted our first time to be – after an emotional night together, and out of lust. I was reminded of a Voltaire quote – "It is not enough to conquer; one must know how to seduce." I wanted to seduce Jasper, not just conquer and sleep with him. I needed him to know, to really know, that this wasn't about one night. This was about much longer, if he wanted.
I rolled Jasper off of me and to the side, first leading with my hands and then my body as I slid down and turned, leaving us in a sixty-nine position with me on top. I pulled his boxer briefs off and felt him pull my own boxers down, neither of us wasting any time before we began to lick, kiss, and touch each other. I felt his soft lips at the head of my hard length as I teased him with my tongue.
Jasper thrust his hips up, moving his cock deeper into my mouth and I groaned around him. He took me further into his mouth as well, the frantic pace we were setting leaving no time for either of us to engage in much foreplay. After a few minutes of Jasper's mouth and tongue, I could feel my body beginning to tense. The noises coming out of my mouth became louder as I felt the first waves of my orgasm hit me, resisting the urge to thrust harder into Jasper's mouth, knowing that it would be a pretty bad idea at that angle. Instead, I focused on working my mouth against his skin harder, sucking him deeper, and using my hands to touch him all over.
Once I felt my orgasm stop, I began to focus on getting Jasper off. Less than a minute later, I could feel the pulsing begin as he cried out. I kept my movements going until I was sure he was finished, and after I had swallowed, I shifted slightly and began to caress and kiss his thighs. I needed a moment to catch my breath again and regain my senses.
After a very short time, I turned back around and laid in Jasper's arms, my head nestled beneath his chin.
"Thank you," I whispered.
He chuckled lowly. "Thank you, too."
"No," I clarified. "Thank you for bringing me here. For trusting me."
We laid together quietly for so long, I was unsure if he was even still awake. It had gotten dark outside and I was cursing my life, because I had to get home soon, as much as I wanted to stay.
I moved my hands a little on Jasper's chest and he stirred slightly. I tilted my head up to look at him and he had a huge grin on his face.
"I have to go soon," I said, then sighed.
"How come you're always saying that to me?" He chuckled slightly.
I smiled softly back at him and hoped he would understand. "I never plan for this to happen."
"Perhaps next time we can have a planned sleepover, then?"
"I'd like that," I said.