Chapter 30: Re-igniting the Flame

Renji flash stepped into the healing center, holding Byakuya's limp body in his arms and yelling for a healer. Isane appeared in front of him, inhaling sharply as she tried to sense any sign of life.

"This way," she said, turning the distraught redhead towards a treatment room.

Unohana taichou appeared as Renji laid Byakuya on the examination table. Renji stood back, his body shaking all over as he watched the two healers. Isane approached him and he shook his head firmly as she tried to coax him out of the room.

"I can't leave him. I swear, I'll stay out of your way, just…just please don't make me go. Think about it. Think about what you would do if it was your taichou. Please…don't make me leave!"

"Allow him to stay, Isane," said Unohana taichou, still leaning over Byakuya.

Renji sighed in relief and moved forward, sitting down quietly and taking a cold, pale hand in his. He watched closely as the fourth division taichou placed her hands on Byakuya's face and chest, then caught her breath softly and narrowed her eyes.

"What is it?" asked Renji, "You can help him, right? He's…going to be okay?"

"He'll be all right," Unohana taichou reassured him, "Someone used a high level kido spell to induce a deathlike state, but he will be all right. I just need to wake him."

"That guy who took Haru did that?" Renji mused, "Why?"

Unohana taichou looked up at Renji, frowning.

"It was not the one who took Haru-san," she said, resolutely, "It was Haru-san himself who placed this kido on Kuchiki taichou."

"What?" Renji gasped, "Haru attacked Byakuya? Why?"

"It wasn't an attack," the healer went on, "I believe he meant it as a way of protecting Kuchiki taichou."

"Protecting him by making him seem dead?" Renji asked, confused.

"If the one who took Haru-san believed Byakuya to be dead, then he would not have reason to harm him. I would suggest that Haru-san wanted to be sure that Kuchiki taichou did not follow where he was being taken. Likely he did this because he realized that Kuchiki taichou's spirit centers had sustained some damage."

"He told me it happened yesterday. Taichou read a letter from Prince Tohma, and he had a bad episode of some kind. He was okay when I got there, except Haru said he needed to rest and not tax his spirit centers, because they were burned by the sudden explosion of power when he went out of control."

"I see," said the healer.

She placed her hands on the noble's chest and sent a shock of kido through him. Byakuya's body twitched and a moment later, his eyes opened and he took a dragging breath and sat up. Unohana taichou pushed him back down gently as Renji breathed a sigh of relief and squeezed his hand.

"Damn it, Taichou! Please don't scare me like that again!" he said, slipping an arm around Byakuya and kissing him on the cheek, "I think you scared at least ten years' life off of me!"

"Haru," Byakuya said, still looking distressed.

"You were alone when I found you," Renji said, "I guess whoever took him got away."

Byakuya's eyes darkened, but he sagged back against the pillows, looking weary.

"Are you okay now, Taichou?"

Byakuya nodded, but Renji could see the deep distress in his eyes.

"What happened?" he asked softly.

Byakuya took a slow, steadying breath.

"I caught up with Haru and Akasawa Tsuyoshi in the valley where you found me. I confronted him and tried to free Haru, but when I sought to attack Tsuyoshi, Haru attacked me to stop me. He worried that I would have burned out my spirit centers. They were…"

"…damaged yesterday when you…reacted so strongly to Prince Tohma's letter. That's why he called me and I stayed with you last night. He thought it would help you sleep more deeply if I was there. But he was right. You're not up to fighting right now. You need to rest."

Byakuya looked as though he wanted to argue, but then glanced up at Unohana taichou, gave a sigh of capitulation and leaned back against the pillows with a defeated expression on his face. He remained quiet and cooperative as the healer finished her assessment, then Unohana taichou straightened and gazed down at him.

"You will recover fully," she said quietly, "but you must rest."

She gave Renji a sideways glance.

"You must also remember that you are still a ward of the Falcon Ridge Center until they deem you fit to be released."

"Aw, come on!" Renji complained, "Anyone can see that…"

"Renji, it's fine," Byakuya said quietly, "Unohana taichou is right. I will rest here and then return to the center. I would be of little use to Haru in my current condition anyway. I will use the time to think about strategy, because we are not just talking about retaking Haru from Tsuyoshi. It will be much harder to infiltrate another clan's manor."

Renji gazed at him for a moment, frowning, then nodded and lowered his eyes.

"Whatever you think is best, Taichou," he said reluctantly, "But Haru…"

"Tsuyoshi wanted to retrieve Haru…not kill him. If we are to be successful in helping him escape, we cannot rush in unprepared. For all that the Akasawa clan is less powerful, they are powerful enough to warrant due caution. I will give this some thought. Renji, would you mind bringing tea?" Byakuya asked quietly.

"Ah…okay, Taichou," he said, shaking his head and sighing, "I'll be back in a few minutes."

He turned and left with the two healers.

Byakuya waited until they were gone, then slipped out of bed and moved towards the window. He looked out at the evening sky, remembering all that had happened and how Haru had worked so hard to help him regain control over mind, body and heart after Tohma took him apart. He was whole again because Haru had understood what he had been through and had been at his side, calming, reassuring, understanding, and carefully directing, until Byakuya could stand on his own again. There was no way in the three worlds that he was going to allow anyone to hurt the man who had done so much for him. He knew he risked much. If he was sensed invading the tower, he would not just face Tsuyoshi, but the strength of his security forces and his family as well.

So he resolved that no matter what happened, he wouldn't allow himself to be discovered.

And if he was, he would fight to the ends of his strength.

Because deep down inside…down in a place Tohma's cruelty could not breach, where no pain inflicted could pass through and no force could overwhelm…Byakuya's resolve to protect still existed. Haru's voice came back to him from out of their many therapy sessions, when Byakuya's mind was still so clouded with confusion and pain, he could not find his way.

"From all you have told me, all that I know of you, one thing stands out. You have a powerful desire to protect what you hold dear. You do not simply lead, you proudly defend what is most important to you. Prince Tohma's cruelty took its toll on you, yes, but that isn't where the most damage was done. Your worst losses were the attacks he made on the ones you love…and how he separated you from them and isolated you so that you could no longer protect them. The illness you feel when you seek nourishment is pent up guilt over what you see as your greatest, most personal failure. If you fail to protect, you imagine you do not deserve the simple comforts of food and drink and peaceful, proper rest. You deny yourself as an admonishment to be stronger, while at the same time draining your own strength. Had you continued down that path, you would have slowly killed yourself. Eventually, your systems would have collapsed and you would have simply faded away and ceased to exist. But by coming here, you have committed yourself to regaining the strength and power Tohma stole from you. We will do this by slowly healing and rebuilding strength in body, mind and heart, so that you can again connect those three sources to regain your full powers."

And Haru had delivered on that promise.

As Byakuya cared for his body and grew physically strong again, he kept in mind always that mission to protect. A weak man could not protect his family and friends, so he must take care of himself to ensure that he would be there for those who needed him. He must train his mind to defend against others who would attempt to harm the ones around him, and he must use the strength of his will to stand up for them. He had resolved in his aching heart to persevere until he met the goals that he and Haru had crafted together. And Byakuya knew that without the help of this man who understood him so well, it was as Haru had said, he would have eventually destroyed himself.

And despite knowing that Haru, too, desired to protect those he cared about, including Byakuya, himself, he decided as he stared out the window, that he could not simply let the counselor go and return to the recovery center. He had to do something. And that fact had him opening the window and preparing to slip out onto the ledge. He was just passing through the window when the door opened and Renji unexpectedly walked back into the room.

But it shouldn't, he thought belatedly, have been unexpected, given that Renji knew exactly what a godsend the counselor had been in the wake of Byakuya's disastrous marriage to the prince. And more than that, Renji knew him better than anyone else, and of course, would have known better than to give him time to escape.

Byakuya turned back and faced Renji, his dark gray eyes intense.

"I was right not to turn my back on you for a second," the redhead said quietly, "I knew you would slip out of here and go after him."

Byakuya froze, his eyes on Renji's and hardly able to draw a proper breath.

"And I understand why. I really do. But you know that Haru was right about your spirit centers. You know. So I'm going to ask you to do something for me."

Byakuya's eyes widened and he caught his breath softly, starting to shake his head against Renji's words.

"Don't, Renji," he said in a voice barely above a whisper and his eyes tearing, "Please don't tell me to sit here and do nothing! I just got my mind back! I'm only now beginning to be able to protect what's important to me! Don't you see? If I lose the ability to do that I will lose myself again! And this time, I might not be able to find my way back! Don't, Renji…don't tell me not to go after him!"

Renji moved closer and reached out with both hands, placing them on the sides of Byakuya's tear-stained face and fastening his eyes on the noble's. And as he looked into his lover's fierce, penetrating gaze, he saw the returning strength, the force of will and the steadfast resolve of the man he had fallen head over heels in love with. He fell on the noble's surprised lips, kissing him hard and breathing his affection in only partially intelligible words. Byakuya met him kiss for kiss, his body shaking softly with emotion.

"I won't ask you not to go after him," Renji breathed against the noble's hungry lips, "That wasn't what I was going to say. Remember, Byakuya, I know you! I know my taichou. And he is the person I need. You see, I'm not asking you not to go after Haru. I wouldn't try to hold you back…and I too, feel indebted to him for giving you back to me when I thought I was going to lose you! He doesn't deserve to be dragged off by some creep like that! I know you're afraid for him. It hasn't been so long since you were Prince Tohma's victim…being beaten and cut down to nothing. You sense that's what will happen to Haru if we don't act, and your heart won't let you hold yourself back. I get all of that, Byakuya."

He took a breath, searching for the right words.

"But the person who can go into that other clan's territory? The one who can go in there and get Haru back without losing himself in the process? It's not Tohma's victim. It's not the guy who was beaten down until he nearly lost the will to fight. And it's not the guy who ran desperately after them and was ready to fry his spirit centers in order to get Haru free!"

His arms tightened around Byakuya, holding him still as he focused on the intense gray eyes and took a steadying breath.

"The guy who can do this is the same guy who I have known and loved almost since the moment I first saw him, the one whose reiatsu alone could crush an enemy, whose mind can think circles around anyone who would try to hurt the ones he loves…and he's the one who survived everything that Tohma threw at him and came back to me when I thought for sure he was gone! The man I'm talking about is my taichou, my lover and my very closest friend! But that guy isn't one who would run heedlessly, blindly and alone into that fortress. My taichou would have a plan…a good one. And he would not leave to save Haru without that strategy…and without me at his side!"

"Renji!" Byakuya breathed, staring at the redhead in surprise.

And he realized the rightness in what Renji was saying. He was right that Byakuya had lost some part of himself as Tohma's abuse overwhelmed him and slowly made him helpless. He had lost even more of himself as his family and friends were pushed away from him and he was left with nothing he cared to defend…not even himself. And that self was warped and twisted into the desperate creature who had destroyed Kuchiki Manor…who had turned on Senbonzakura and attacked Renji…who had run heedlessly after Haru and had foolishly thought that his force of will alone could defeat Tsuyoshi. He saw everything then and knew beyond doubt that Renji was right and he was going to have to carve out a better plan…one that used their strengths and offset any weaknesses. It was the only way to see Haru was successfully freed. He looked back at Renji, the strength building in his gray eyes and the resolve firming inside him until his reiatsu began to flare around him. Renji smiled at him.

"There now," he said, taking Byakuya's hand and squeezing it gently, "I knew you were still in there somewhere. Welcome back, Taichou. It's been…too long."

"It has, Renji," Byakuya replied, moving closer and wrapping his arms around the redhead, "But I finally see now. I see what I was doing. Even having put what happened behind me, I was still reacting blindly to everything that occurred…Tohma's letter…Haru's abduction? I didn't realize. To truly come back from that place, I have to regain control of myself and think things through. I have to have the strength to be patient, the capacity to plan carefully, the intelligence to recognize and identify what we will need to do to assure our success and the drive to carry out those plans and to not give in until we have what we have back what was taken! I see it all now, thanks to you! Arigato, Abarai fukutaichou, for bringing me to my senses."

Renji's smile widened and he took Byakuya's face in his hands again, kissing him passionately. He pulled away and met the fierce gray eyes happily, treasuring as he did, the full beauty and intensity of his taichou. And if there were any doubts in his mind about Byakuya's fitness to plan and carry out Haru's rescue, they were swept away as the noble's reiatsu blazed softly around him and he stepped out onto the ledge with Renji at his side.

"Hey Taichou," said Renji, "You think Unohana taichou will try to stop us? She did say that you were still a ward of the recovery center…"

"She did," Byakuya agreed, flash stepping down from the building and onto the street outside the fourth division, "But she was really just sending me the same message that you were…that it wasn't enough to just want to save Haru. I will have to use everything in my arsenal to defeat Tsuyoshi. But I have just regained the ability to do that. And nothing and no one is going to stop me!"

The two men froze for a moment as flash steps sounded all around them. They tensed, preparing to fight their way free, then caught their breath in surprise at the faces of the ones surrounding them.

Rukia.

Torio.

Kisuke.

Ichigo.

Yoruichi.

"Damn," Renji breathed, "It looks like the cavalry just arrived!"

He turned to the ones around them.

"Thanks, guys, for getting here so fast. I held him for as long as I could, but you know how stubborn Taichou can be when he's determined to do something."

He turned back to Byakuya.

"Now…let's get to work on that rescue plan!"