A/N: I couldn't wait; hope you don't mind. Try not to think too ill of Nyota in this one, ok? She and Spock are wonderful people but they're far from perfect and sometimes things happen and they deal with it poorly. I guess this chapter could be considered rated T for some of the darker themes and hints. If you get a chance please review and let me know what you think!

Unexpected

U.S.S. Enterprise, 2269.45, 0915. "Are you sure, Len?"

He watched her pull herself upright on the biobed, staring at him as if he could magically change the answer. "I ran the test four times, Darlin', and on two different machines. I'm sure." Nyota anxiously fiddled with the hem of her shirt. He hadn't expected this reaction and he really wished he knew what to say. "You want me to call Spock down here so we can give him the news?"

"No."

Although he didn't want to Len couldn't help but think back to the last time she held back from the walking, talking computer and how well that worked out. "Ny, if you don't…"

"I just meant I didn't want you calling him down here. I'll tell him myself tonight after the kids are in bed."

"You sure?"

Hell he hated the way she rolled her eyes, actin' like she couldn't believe that he wouldn't trust her. His lack of faith wasn't without precedent, that was for sure. "Yes, I'll tell him. I promise."

"Alright."

She got up and stepped behind the privacy screen so she could change into her uniform and head to the Bridge.

Spock picked up on her anxiety the instant she felt it but she refused to comment on the matter and he did not want to push her; instead he settled for monitoring her through the bond and sneaking glances as she sat at her station. Whatever was on Nyota's mind she was shielding it from him most effectively.

It was during lunch that he overheard several junior crewmembers commenting on their plans for the evening. He was unaware that today was the Terran holiday commemorating romantic overtures towards one's partner.

As a half-human bonded to a full human Spock felt his emotional limitations keenly, especially in this instance. Surmising that his lack of initiative in celebrating this holiday was the source of his wife's ill-humor he immediately set about rectifying the situation.

He didn't know it but Spock had little ways of making her (unintentionally) feel like shit and now, on top of everything else, he went ahead and made her feel like the world's worst wife ever…and all thanks to a candlelight dinner for two.

All day long she processed McCoy's news and worried how to tell Spock. She worried so much that she wanted to delay the inevitable for as long as possible, going so far as to volunteer to cover the first half of Jose's gamma shift so he could spend some time with his boyfriend for Valentine's Day. All this subterfuge just to avoid her husband was absurd and she knew it but she couldn't stop herself. Spock looked at her strangely but knew she had an important duty to perform; he said he would handle the kids' bedtime routine and see her at home when she was through.

Nyota crawled in late to a dimly-lit room with a table set for two in the middle. The candles in the candlesticks were nearly burnt to the quick and cast small shadows over the now-cold vegetarian meals. Her heart shattered but she made sure her shields were firm.

Spock crossed the room and collected the equipment in her hands then held her close. "I don't deserve you," she murmured against his chest.

Reverently, he kissed the crown of her head. "It is I who do not deserve you."

And then the dam broke.

Nyota was crying; not the sweet, silent tears he had come to associate with her happiness—no, these were tears of pain. He pulled away slightly to get a better look at her face and brushed a salty drop away with his thumb. "K'diwa, I do not know what is troubling you, but something…"

"I'm pregnant," she blurted out amidst her tears.

He stiffened up against her and she continued to cry. Slowly he brought one hand to her abdomen; she was correct. After a moment's pause he brought his free hand up to her psi point to show her the glimmering lifespark. "This is most unexpected."

She sniffled. "You're telling me."

"The child is far along. How did you not notice this before?"

Nyota stepped back roughly, breaking the meld and wiping the tears off her cheeks. "I just didn't, ok? I've been irregular ever since we had Se'tak and between you and the kids and our jobs I've just been too busy notice! Don't you think I feel bad enough as is, walking around all these weeks carrying our baby and not knowing until I'm this far gone?"

Spock drew his lips together in a thin line. "I was not criticizing you, I was merely making an observation. Our family and our careers have left us both with very little time together as of late, for I too did not notice the lifespark until now despite the fact that he appears to be healthy."

"We're having another boy?" He nodded and she began crying in earnest once again.

He had always found it best when she was in a heightened emotional state such as this not to talk but to wait until she recovered her voice; so he guided her over to a chair and sat her down, pulling the other one up in front of it so she would know he was there when she was ready.

As he sat down Spock tried to pull her hands into his lap and she jerked them back. She hated herself for thinking the things she was thinking right now and she didn't want him to have to see it too. After five minutes her sobs began to subside enough that she could focus on him.

"Your tears are not borne solely from an excess of hormones."

Nyota snorted. "That's the understatement of the year." She looked down and put a hand over her stomach; she was a terrible, horrible person…

"Nyota…"

"I'm not sure I can do this." The words were out before she could stop herself and he quickly angled his body away. A cold, pervasive damp began to seep across their link as he registered her meaning.

"Spock…" She reached out to him, tried to suffuse warmth into the bond, but she knew she was fighting a losing battle. "It's just that I thought…I thought this part of our lives was over. I didn't think it was possible for me to get pregnant again, knowing how we beat the odds the first two times. Plus, T and Se'tak are older now and it's hard enough looking after them without adding a newborn to the mix. And I'm not sure I can physically handle another long pregnancy again." At the mere thought of the nausea, back pain, and bloating she'd experienced especially with her last pregnancy Nyota groaned.

"You speak as though you are going through this experience alone," he spat out bitterly. "I too have assisted in raising the children we have now and understand the difficulties inherent in caring for them, let alone in your carrying them to term. I have always assisted you to the utmost of my ability."

He still avoided her gaze and Nyota put a finger under his chin and made him look in her direction. "You have been the best bondmate and father possible."

"Yet my efforts are still inadequate to induce you into having a third child."

Nyota jerked her hand back. "That's not what I said. You're twisting my words."

"For a linguist as cunning as you that should be an impossible task."

"UGH!" She leapt up off the chair and stalked toward their bedroom, stopping herself beside the door. "Stop it! I know why you want this baby as badly as you do but think about this logically, Spock! I love you and I love our children but I thought we were fine as a family of four!" Taking a deep breath she added quietly, "I'm not sure we have time or room in our lives for this right now, that's all I'm saying."

U.S.S. Enterprise, 2269.52, 0148. They barely spoke to each other for the rest of that week, only acknowledging the other's presence when in the company of their children or as their profession demanded. Spock had even taken to crawling into bed in the middle of Nyota's REM cycle and getting the bare minimum of his own allotted sleep in order to avoid her.

Every life was precious; he had learned that lesson the day he became part of an endangered species and again when T'Alora and Se'tak were born. He also loved Nyota more then his own life and only ever wanted to see her content. If—and here he tried to search for a proper euphemism—giving up this baby made her happy…

…but would he ever be able to look at her the same way again if she did?

Spock had insufficient data to properly form an answer.

He returned from the gym early in the morning to find Nyota curled up in bed on her side facing the wall. He was halfway to the closet to disrobe when she spoke.

"I have an appointment to see Len in the morning."

So that was it then. She had made her decision.

His blood grew cold.

"Understood."

Snatching up a pillow and blanket he returned to the living room to sleep on the couch.

Something was off. Jim watched the way Spock sat in his chair, body angled ever-so-slightly toward the turbolift. He didn't think it was possible but he even appeared to be sitting more stiffly then ever before. In fact, Spock was so distracted by his own thoughts he didn't even hear him coming.

"Everything ok, Spock?"

Vulcans did not leap like startled cats out of chairs…though they were known to noticeably flinch when caught unawares. His voice was like ice. "Affirmative, Captain."

Jim was about to beg to differ when Spock wordlessly rose an eyebrow. Ok then, so he really didn't want to talk about it…that was fine. He wandered away to the next station still worrying about his First Officer.

She returned to the Bridge trying to attract as little attention to herself as possible. It was all done; she couldn't go back now. As she exited the lift she immediately sensed Spock's eyes on her and saw the Captain stop in his hourly turn about the Bridge to look at her.

"You alright, Uhura?" he asked. "You ill?"

"Everything's fine, Captain. I'm not sick." Looking pointedly at Spock she added, "We're both fine."

Her adun jerked in his seat as if physically shocked. "Yes, Spock, you heard me. We're both alright." Nyota showed him glimpses of her thoughts over the last few days, her discussion and examination with Len, the pre-natal vitamins she'd collected from Chris and the follow-up appointment she made. Still stunned by the revelation Spock haltingly shared with her snatches of his own dark thoughts.

Nyota frowned and shook her head as she took her seat. "I was scared when I said those things...and I would never have done that to you, not without telling you. I know I said I had some reservations but the more I thought about it…" Her inner voice trailed off and she showed him some of her most treasured memories from T'Alora's and Se'tak's infancies. The weight of them in her arms, the smell of their skin, the downy softness of their hair… "I'm still concerned but with you by my side, Ashayam, I know we'll make this work."

"Indeed." He pressed upon her the full weight of his joy.

She tuned a few dials at her station before adding, "We should probably tell the kids tonight, and the rest of our friends not too long after. You know as well as I do that the munchkins won't be able to keep this a secret, especially not Se'tak."

Spock pictured their son running full tilt around the ship, telling anyone and every one who would listen about his baby brother-to-be. "'Thou art as wise as thou art beautiful'."

She smirked. "Flatterer. Does this mean you'll forgive me?"

Against his natural inclination she watched Spock extend two fingers in her direction and she silently caressed them back.

Chekov turned to ask the Lieutenant a question and found her gazing at her husband, their fingers wound around each other in a most intimate manner. He spun back to his console and focused on the stars in the view screen, wondering what had brought on such a public display of affection from the notoriously private couple.

He found out the next morning when Se'tak burst in on his breakfast in the Mess, telling him all about his coming brother.