Okay… so this chapter is straight old school fluff. I wasn't even planning on posting it because it was mostly an attempt to overcome the madness of writers block, but I'm going on vacation today (yeah Florida!) and have nothing new ready to post at the moment. It does fall in the correct timeline of the story, though. This is right after Nerdward and Troubledlla get back together.
For you present-focused readers, you might want to wait till next time (whenever that may be). There is not a lot of plot progression and you wont get lost for chapter 19 if you choose to skip this, but I think it's a good read anyway. Real cute. And comical. And shows there were actually a lot of good times in the past, despite all the crap Bella pulled.
I don't own. Thanks for reading!
October 3, 2006 – Junior Year
I straddle Edward on the couch in the living room of the house on Goss, kissing any skin I can reach, and rubbing myself shamelessly all over him.
"You are making it extremely difficult to focus on Anatomy," he declares with a chuckle.
"Oh, yes. Please focus on my anatomy," I whisper huskily in his ear.
"Bella," he says, groaning slightly. His free hand – the one not holding onto the textbook for dear life - tightens on my thigh, limiting my mobility considerably. "It was the focusing on your anatomy last night that means I have to focus on this anatomy now. I behind on my reading for tomorrow."
"But no one's home. We can have sex anywhere!" I point out, very logically mind you.
He laughs and kisses my nose. "I love you, but we are definitely not having sex anywhere at the moment."
"Yeah, well I hate you." I cross my arms over my chest and lean back to glare at him. He smiles again, damn him, and removes my lip from between my teeth with his thumb.
"Hot hate is twin brother to hot love," he murmurs in my ear.
I shutter slightly and punch him in the shoulder.
"Really? You're quoting Sir Arthur Conan Doyle at me? You're slinging around literary references, and you're not even going to fuck me?" I punch him repetitively, not stopping until her traps my somewhat ineffectual fists in his much larger hands. "You hated that book and so did I!"
"Like the line though." He smirks at me while I glare at him, breathing heavily in my anger and tunred-on-ness.
"But I'm horny, Edward!" I whine petulantly. I sound like a toddler having a full-fledged temper tantrum. Except it's a needing nookie temper tantrum, which is not something toddlers usually get upset about.
But I digress.
He chuckles again and blushes slightly, finally setting aside the heavy textbook he's held onto since I plopped myself down on his lap.
"How about we make a deal?"
"A sex deal?" I ask brightly, pleased when his thumbs start tracing circles on my lower back.
"Exactly. If we have sex now, you have to promise to leave me alone tonight and let me get caught up on reading," he says, looking stern.
"We're going to the library tonight," I point out, tracing the sharp line of his jaw with my tongue and grabbing on to the glorious hair. "You'll get stuff done."
"That hasn't stopped us in the past," he reminds me. I'm pleased to hear his voice get husky and his breathing pick up as his hands tighten their grip on my waist. Ah, library sex. So hot. So dangerous. "So do we have a deal or what?"
"Do you hear how ridiculous you sound?" I reply, suddenly pissed that he doesn't want to do me. "I don't want to fuck someone who doesn't want to fuck me." I try to get off his lap and retreat into a different room, but he holds me in place.
"What the hell are you talking about?" he asks, frowning.
"I've never had to, nor should I have to, coerce anyone into having sex with me," I hiss, punching him again.
"Bella," he says with a slight smile. "I always want to have sex with you. That's the problem!"
I stare at him blankly for a moment before once again attempting to get as far away from him as possible. But, once again, he fucking overpowers me.
"Listen, love. If I spent all the time I was with you doing exactly what I wanted to do with you, neither of us would ever get anything done! We wouldn't even eat! Or sleep! We would just have sex. All the time," he tells me, looking bemused.
"So you do want to have sex with me?" I clarify.
He lets out a strangled laugh. "What do you think?" he asks, thrusting up off the couch and letting me feel just how much he wants me. "It's hard to remember all the stuff I have to do, all the responsibilities I have when you're near me. You are all I can think about."
"Really?"
"Yes, silly girl," he says, taking my face in between his palms. "I love you, mind and body just as I want you, mind and body."
He's making me feel all tender and girly and I don't like it, so I punch him in the shoulder again.
"Bella!"
"Are we going to do it or not?" I demand.
He lets out some sort of frustrated growl before kissing me. I basically squeal in delight and try to remove his clothes as quickly as possible while my mouth moves against his. It's difficult because under his sweater there is a shirt with a lot of buttons to deal with and I only get about half of the done before I'm distracted from my mission. Edward kisses his way down my neck to my exposed chest as his hand snakes down my stomach into my jeans.
I half sigh and half giggle as his talented figures touch me just how I like it.
"What's so amusing," he inquires, blinking up at me from the region of my tits, his hands never ceasing their movement.
"We got in a sex fight," I say with a laugh, winding my fingers through his hair and rocking against his hand.
"That we did," he agrees, lips moving back to my chest.
I kiss him again but then stupid fucking Alice and stupid fucking Rosalie and their stupid fucking, boyfriends rudely interrupt us.
"Wow," Rosalie comments casually as I glance up at them loitering in the kitchen behind the couch. Edward squeaks and frantically tries to close my flannel shirt. He removes his hand from down my panties and I let out a low growl in frustration. "That was kinda hot for a bunch of nerds."
Emmett and Jasper high five before breaking out into a jerky little hip thrusting sex dance. I blush furiously and hide my face in Edward neck.
"Ew, shut the fuck up, Rose!" Alice shrieks, dramatically throwing a hand over her eyes. "That's our best friend and my brother fornicating on my couch!"
"Oh, please," Rose scoffs. "Like you've never fornicated on that couch."
"Double ew! What the fuck have you been doing on my couch! " Alice continues to freak, rounding on her older brother and shaking him violently, as Edward and I readjust our clothes to cover our private bits.
"Lookin' good, Bells," Emmett says, winking at me before jumping away as Rosalie joins Alice in a physical assault against the giant oaf.
"Shut the hell up, Emmett!" Edward yells, scowling over his shoulder at his brother as he moves to fix his own button up.
"What, it's the truth!" Em grabs three beers from the fridge and settles across from us on the couch, handing us each a bottle. I slide my butt off Edward but keep my legs draped across his lap. With a final inventory of our clothing situation, Edward lets out a frustrated huff and accepts an open beer from Emmett. I do the same as the rest of the family joins us.
"Sorry to interrupt," says Jasper, his expression fluctuating between amusement and regret. "But this is the living room, don't yah know."
"Thus the basis of its appeal," I say with an eye roll. I can't believe after all the fighting, we don't even get our sex on.
"What are you guys doing tonight?" asks Alice, absently flipping through a fashion magazine as she sips on a glass of white wine.
"Anatomy," Edward says, picking up his fucking textbook again.
"Yeah, anatomy," I agree as Edward stifles a moan. Giggling, I pinch his butt causing him to yelp.
"Will you please stop that bizarre mating ritual, you two?" Alice pleads. "God, you're worse than Rose and Emmett."
"I find that offensive," says Rosalie.
"Me too!" interjects Emmett.
"Good grief," says Jasper with a headshake. He's the most sensible of our little family unit. And by most sensible I mean least insane.
"Why is it so hard to have a normal conversation with you people?" Alice asks in disbelief. "Bella, how was your day?"
"Almost perfect," I mumble glaring at the four cockblockers across from me.
"Stop pouting, you horny slut," Rosalie says with a scoff.
"Don't call her that," Edward snaps, glaring at Rosalie.
"I'm thinking about getting a cat," I announce, mostly to stop the argument brewing between Rose and Edward, but also because I really want a cat.
"No, you're not," Edward scoffs at me. "No, she isn't," he assures the rest of the family.
I just smile serenely and let the conversation drift elsewhere. I settle next to Edward as the housemates chatter. With the book in his lap, glasses on his face, and a beer in his hand, he looks just about perfect.
For once I feel apart of something bigger than myself. And I like it.
November 7, 2006
On a sunny winter day, Edward and I eat lunch on the steps of Norlin Library. We face the mountains, not speaking but seated with no space between us. With the sun on my face, I stare at the Flatirons as I munch on my sandwich. I can feel Edward gazing at me, and I wonder what he's thinking.
As an RA, I get munch money to spend in the dining halls, and I brought us each a sandwich. Edward has tuna. It's nothing special, but it's free and he gets to meet me.
"You look so beautiful, with the sun bringing out the red in your hair," he says quietly. He tells me I'm beautiful all the time. I'm still not all that comfortable with the compliments, so I change the subject.
"I'm thinking about getting a cat," I say abruptly, interrupting his musings.
"What?" he asks like an idiot.
"A cat. I've decided that I'm a cat person," I say, with a shrug.
"What the hell are you talking about?" I turn to look at him and giggle at his incredulous expression.
"I want a cat. You know, a cuddly little kitty that I can rescue from the shelter and give a home." I've been thinking about this for a while. Something to nurture in my life will only improve me, I think.
"But cat's are living things. They need food. You have to take care of them. It's a big responsibility," he argues, being the logical one as usual.
I snort into my peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Several of the chips I've crammed in between the slices of bread to make the meal crunchy fall by our feet at the movement, but Edward doesn't notice.
"I deal with twenty crazed freshmen daily. I think I can handle a pet," I say, slightly offended that he thinks I can't do the cat thing.
"Have you ever even had a pet before?" he demands, going a different route as he sees that I'm serious.
"Nope. Figure now is as good a time as ever," I say, finishing off my meal and lighting up a cigarette as I recline on my elbows.
"You're ridiculous," he says, smiling.
"Great. It's settled then. You want to come with me to the pound this weekend? We can pick one out together."
He shakes his head and smiles. I can see the exact moment he realizes just what I'm asking.
"Isabella," he says, keeping his voice pleasant as he reaches out to rub the back of my neck with his thumb." The dorms have a no pet policy, don't they?"
"Yup," I reply, avoiding his gaze.
"Isabella," he continues, playing with my fingers on the hand that I placed on his thigh. He knows I'm trying to distract him with my general sexiness, no doubt. "Where will this cat live?"
"With us, silly," I say dismissively.
"Us?" he stammers.
"Yeah. I mean, I spend so much time at your house anyway. It will make more sense for our little kitty to live there instead." I scoot closer to him, one hand moving farther up his thigh and the other threading through his hair.
"My house?" He sounds like an idiot, and I hope my close proximity is distracting him enough to let me get my way.
I shuffle around on the stairs, coming to rest in front of him in between his thighs. I wrap my arms around his neck and press my chest to his. His eyes flutter closed, allowing me to kiss both his eyelids.
"Yes, Edward," I breathe in his ear as he tightens his grip on my hips. I kiss him slowly, deeply, but I end it far too quickly. "So I'm glad that's settled."
He hums something incomprehensible and kisses me again, slipping his palms underneath my shirt at the small of my back. Groaning, he presses his thumbs into my back dimples that he claims to like so much, and I forget that we are in public.
I giggle at his desperation and nibble on his lip.
"We'll go to the pound this weekend, then," I murmur, thinking that I've sufficiently seduced the desired answer out of him.
"Not a chance," he snickers suddenly, shocking the hell out of me. I'm used to getting what I want with Edward.
"But—"
"You're sexy as hell, Isabella," he tells me as I lean away, sitting on my heels. "But I hate cats."
"But—"
"It's really never going to happen."
My lips part slightly as I gape at him in shock. He smiles the crooked smile he knows I love before standing. He shoulders his unnecessarily enormous backpack, and pulls me up with a hand.
"Come on, you crazy cat lady," he says, keeping his hand in mine. Let me walk you to class."
November 10, 2006
On nights that I have RA duty, Edward usually stays with me in Hallett. Back in the day, I hated having duty on Friday nights because I was unable to go out and party. Now, I don't mind as much. I like staying in with Edward. He's the ultimate distraction, and I don't need all that outside crap distracting me from him.
Tonight, we watch a Ken Burns documentary on PSB. We sit sideways on my narrow bed with our backs against the wall, looking at my miniscule little TV.
My door stays open, letting everyone in Hallett know that I'm the onw that will deal with any issues that might arise between the hours of eight PM and two AM. I just hope that no one bleeds or gets alcohol poisoning or does something stupid before I can close my door and fuck my boy.
Already, way before Thanksgiving, a commercial comes on for Christmas crap. I snort in disgust and burrow deeper into Edward's side.
"I'm telling you now, so you have time to mentally prepare yourself," he says, pressing a thumb into my hip. "But I'm going to get you a Christmas present."
"Um, no your not," I say. "Because I'm not getting you one."
"Seriously, why not?"
"Because you can't give me anything I want that I don't already have," I tell him. He puts up with my shit and makes me come all the time. What else could I want?
"You have to want something," he murmurs.
"Nope."
"Yes, you do. Think about it."
"Oh!" I say, sitting up and turning on the mattress to face him. "I know what I want!"
"Really?" he says, sounding unsure.
"Yeah. A kitty cat!"
He groans and whacks his head backwards against the wall. "Really, Bella? You're still on this cat thing?"
"I really think a cute little kitten would be a great addition to our lives," I say, nodding sagely.
"It's really not going to happen."
I progress to go on a violent rant complete with violent hand gestures and at least eight "cocksuckers", but Edward seems unruffled. I lean back against the wall with a thud and cross my arms over my chest when I finish.
"I really not scared of you," he tells me with a smirk. Something about the way he says it makes me go all soft inside. Edward isn't scared of anything. Doesn't he know that?
"Baby," I say, shuffling around to face him. "I know you aren't afraid of me. You're not afraid of anything, you warrior you. "
"What the hell are you talking about?" he asks, looking puzzled. "I'm a dork."
And he says I'm the one who doesn't see myself clearly. Hypocrite.
"You're like the peaceful warrior who only jumps into action under the most dire of circumstances," I tell him, including some kick ass karate moves to support my point.
"Warrior?" he asks, still confused. "Me?"
"Yes," I say, giggling. "You always defend me to Rosalie when she calls me a slut—"
"That's because you aren't and she has no business calling you something so vile," he sputters angrily. I smile and continue as if he didn't speak.
"You stand up to Jake, even when he tries to intimidate you out of my life," I say, listing my evidence for warrior Edward on my fingers.
"I—" I put a hand over his mouth, forcing him to remain silent.
"And you punched James," she remind him, wincing slightly at the unpleasant memory. "You're a total warrior, Edward Cullen, even if you do wear a lot of sweaters, vests, and corduroy pants."
"I'm a doofus," he mumbles, utterly gob smacked by my words, apparently.
"If you're a doofus," I say, leaning forward to get as close to Edward as possible without actually touching him. He closes my eyes, letting me kiss each lid. "Than I'm a doofus." It's cheesy and a little Notebook-esque, but true.
He scoffs, looking down at me, surveying my wardrobe. I wear a pair of leopard print thermal long underwear leggings as PJ bottoms, a long sleeve, blue v-neck t-shirt, and my usually collection of rings and bracelets.
"You have your own style" he sputters, "and it's undeniably cool. You smoke, listen to reggae music, paint your nails black, and have a nose ring. Bella Swan is definitely not doofus material."
"It's true!" I insist. "I spend most of my free time in the library with you. I'm an RA which is the college equivalent of a narc, and I'm watching an eleven part documentary on the Civil War on a Friday night. We're a couple of motherfucking doofuses."
He pulls me back into his side, kissing my forehead and holding me close. "We are not. Doofuses don't have as much good sex as we do," he whispers in my ear.
I blush. I hate blushing. It's so rare and annoying an occurrence.
"That's right, baby," I say. "Lots and lots of sex. So can we get a cat?"
"No!"
I like to think I'm making progress.
December 6, 2006
"Edward!" I bellow from the hallway of Hallett, causing him to jump about a foot in his seat at my dorm room desk. Edward came back to Hallett after his morning classes. I was having a lazy morning, reading in bed. We screwed around for a couple hours before I headed off to my own classes. I wasn't supposed to be back for another forty-five minutes, and Edward has obviously been using my empty room to study. As usual.
"What? Are you okay? What happened?" he demands in a panic as he turns to look at me doorway. I'm bundled in a black puffy jacket with a fur hood, a yellow scarf, burgundy hobo gloves, and combat boots. My cheeks are flushed, and I smile at him to indicate that nothing is wrong. Quite the opposite, actually.
"Facking shat, dude," I shriek, bounding over to him joyfully. Taking his face between my hands, I jerk his head in the general direction of the only window in the small room. "Do you not look up at all when you study? Do you even see anything beyond this book?"
"Sometimes," he mumbles defensively. He attempts to remove my grip from his chin, but I hold firm. His brain is probably still focused on chemistry equations and body parts. He's not getting what I want him to see.
"Look with your eyeballs, anatomy boy," I insist, shaking him slightly. "You know what those are, don't you?"
"I see a whole lot of grey sky," he grumbles in reply. "Snow—"
"SNOW! Exactly! It's the first snow of the season!" I squeak. Feeling more like Alice than myself, I plop into Edward's lap and kiss him quickly.
"You look like a little kid," he murmurs. "Your eyes are bright."
He puts his arms around me as I lay my head on his shoulder.
"I love the first snow," I tell him softly, wishing that I'd removed my thick coat because too many layers are separating us. "It's so clean. Makes everything fresh, shinny and new. Of course, but February I'll be cursing the weather gods and hating the cold, but right now I love it."
"It's quite beautiful," he says, kissing my temple. "Aren't you supposed to be in class?'
"The professor let us go earily," I explain. "It's really stickin' out there and everyone wanted to play."
"Do you want to play, Isabella?" he breathes in my ear, causing me to shiver because its his sex voice. But I won't let him distract me now. It's the first snow of the season!
"Always," I reply, kissing him quickly before leaping off his lap and rummaging around in my closet. I emerge triumphant with Edward's coat, gloves, scarf, and hat. "Let's get outside!"
"What is it?" Edward asks, a couple hours later. His cheeks are red and snowflakes get caught on his eyelashes. He looks so perfect, all bundled up, so I'm about four seconds away from tackling him. But first I need to explain my snow art.
"What do you think it is?" I ask, slightly offended that he isn't recognize my work for the genius it is.
Edward cocks his head to the side, studying the ground at our feet. His eyes scrunch together and he looks at my art just like he looks at complicated calculus equations.
"I hope this isn't a cat," he says finally.
"It is! It totally, totally is!" I yell in delight.
"Lordy, Isabella," he says with a smile. "Why does it have so many legs? Or is that a penis?"
Now totally offended, I give into my urge to tackle him. We tip over, but the soft snow breaks our fall. Laughing, I straddle him. He's laughing too, until I slowly lean towards his face. He seems to stop breathing and gets this adorable little smile on his face. So naturally I take this as a good opportunity to shove a fist full of snow into his face.
He yelps and stares at me in shock for a moment before reaching up and pushing my face into a nearby snow bank. Things deteriorate into an all out war from there. There is no clear victor by the end, but Edward and I are both soaked down to our undies.
It's so fucking cold, we sprint back to Hallett. Checking quickly that no ones around, we strip and step into the hot shower in the girl's bathroom. I could probably lose my job for such a stunt, but it's totally worth it. There is really no other way to get warm.
December 16, 2006
"Stop fiddling around with your blindfold," Edward scolds me. Slowly I remove my hands from my eyes, hoping he can see my scowl under the scarf he's tied around my face.
"I hate surprises," I say petulantly.
"Deal with it," he responds. I feel the car turn sharply to the right.
"Did finals break your brain? Are you kidnapping me? Are you taking me deep into the mountains to murder me and then dispose of the body?" I ask, fiddling with the knot at the back of my head again.
"You are such a drama queen," he says with a chuckle. I try to punch him in the arm for laughing at me, but I can't fucking see so I miss. "And you can relax because we're here."
I wait while Edward gets out of my truck and opens my door. I grope for his hand, and he helps me clamor down from the cab. He stands behind me, wrapping his arms around me and awkwardly walking us forward.
"Okay," he says when we enter a building. I can only tell by the sounds of the doors and the central heating. "Take the damn thing off already."
I yank the scarf down and leave it around my neck, letting my eyes adjust to the light. Slowly, I take in the desk in front of me. The banner above it reads "Humane Society of Boulder County". I turn to Edward, gaping at him in shock for a moment before throwing my arms around his neck.
"Seriously?" I ask when I get a grip.
"Are you seriously surprised?" he asks, grabbing my hand and leading towards the back where the animals are kept. "I thought you were just humoring me with all those demands to tell you where we were going."
"Yeah. I actually am. I really didn't think you were going to cave," I say, still smiling in surprise.
"How could I not give you the one thing you wanted for Christmas?" he asks, kissing my temple.
We walk up and down the aisles, and I want every single cat I see. Even the grizzled old ones. But Edward reminds me that not only are the kittens fucking cute, but they'll live longer. I don't really need something else I love up and leaving me in the near future, so I agree.
"Edward, look," I say, crouching down and pointing at the tiny cat, sleeping in a curled up ball. "He's a ginger, like you!"
"I'm not a ginger," he grumbles, squatting next to me. "Although he's cute. And apparently only 2 months old."
The little kitten, sensing our presence even through the glass, wakes and turns to study us. He has big green, slightly crossed eyes, and he cocks his head to the side, studying me just like my favorite ginger does. He's Edward in cat form.
"That it. He's the one."
"That scrawny little thing?"
"He's perfect."
December 31, 2007
"Do we have to go?" Edward demands petulantly. He is so cute when he frowns, I can't help but giggle at his childish expression.
"Yes, silly," I reply, wagging a finger at Waldo. He is too scared to jump up onto our bed and is mewling pathetically from the floor. I scoot away from the edge of the bed and pull back the blankets to give him more room. "Come on, my little nerd. You can do it. Up, up, up."
"Bella, you best not be talking to my dick," Edward says grumpily from behind me. "I mean, that just insulting on multiple levels."
Laughing at Edward's absurdity, I pat the bed in encouragement until Waldo finally makes the leap.
"Edward! He did it!" I shout, sweeping my kitty into my arms and giving him a good cuddle. "He's growing up so fast."
"Bella. He manages to get up here every night to sleep on my head without much difficulty. I don't know why you are acting like this is such a big deal," he mumbles rolling away from me in favor of looking at the ceiling and crossing his arms over his bare chest.
"That's because I help him. He just got up here all on his own," I say, cooing down at the kitty purring in against my side.
"Fucking great," he mutters.
"What has you all fucking pissy this lovely evening?" I ask, still using the baby voice reserved for Waldo that annoys everyone, myself included. "We've done it like nine times in the last day and a half. You should be much happier if I was doing it right."
Edward spent Christmas in Forks, while I was here in Boulder. Charlie actually flew out for a few days and we had our holiday with the Blacks. Phil even joined us. All three of my father figures were in the same place and it was fucking weird, but everyone got along. Charlie really bonded over cars and fishing with Billy and Jake while he and Phil mostly stuck to the safe topic of baseball.
Overall, it was a damn good holiday. Very rarely do I feel like I have a family, but I sure did this Christmas. It may be pretty fucked up and far from traditional, but it's definitely a family.
Despite all the joy of the holiday, I missed Edward so much it was borderline unbearable. We were apart for six whole days, and so we've pretty much spent every moment since he flew home yesterday in bed, making up for lost time.
Edward rolls over again, resting his head against my chest and throwing a leg over my waist. "You always do it right," he assures me. His hot breath tickles my ear and I giggle. "But I would much rather just keep you here all to myself."
"We have to go to Jake's," I reply, wrapping my spare arm around his head and holding him to me. "It's a New Year's tradition."
"We can make our own, new tradition," he whispers seductively in my ear before kissing down my neck and nipping at my collarbone. I shift closer, disturbing poor Waldo who lets out an adorable little hiss before settling himself primly on the far corner at the foot of the bed, out of harms way. For the most part.
Using his shoulder, I pull Edward on top of me until his full weight rests on the length of my body. Now, I really enjoy being on top, doing it from behind, up against a wall, on all fours, in the shower, you name it. But there is nothing quite like the feel of Edward laid out on me. I feel safe. Secure. And… cared for. He makes me keep my eyes open, and it makes everything so intense. It's a little uncomfortable, how much I feel for him.
Edward sighs in contentment, smiling down at me before kissing me soundly. I can feel his smile against my lips, and it has the warmth spreading in my belly. My hands travel from his boney shoulders, down the sculpted plane of his back. I love his back. I open my mouth to receive his tongue, and pressing my fingertips into his spine as I make my way to his truly delicious ass. One hand fists in my hair as his other cradles my jaw, I let out a low whimper. Our parts line up so conveniently and we are already naked, and I feel his hardness so close to where I want him.
"Oh, Bella," he groans out as I lift my hips off the bed and pull him towards me with my hands on each ass cheek. "How is that I always want you?" He moves his mouth to my tits, scraping his teeth across the tops before settling with his mouth on my nipple. I hiss in pleasure as his tongue swirls around the peak.
"I love you," he murmurs against my skin, causing me to tense ever so slightly. He doesn't say it very often, but unfortunately I know he thinks he means it. At first, when this unpleasant little declaration became a habit on his part, I would scream at him. We would get in huge fights, me trying to change his mind, him adamantly refusing to do so. Now, I just ignore him. It's easier this way.
We continue to grope and kiss until we're both breathing heavily. His mouth returns to mine, and his pushes a hand between our bodies, circling closer to where I must have him.
Of course it is at this exactly the moment Alice closes to bang on the closed bedroom door.
"Hey! None of that you two!" she calls, causing me to groan in frustration and Edward to growl. He lets out a slew of curses under his breath, including "cocksucker" which makes me smile.
"Go the fuck away, Alice!" he yells, scowling over his shoulder at the door. Immediately, he lowers his head to my lips to mine, only to be interrupted again.
"But it's already almost ten!" his twin shrieks back. "And Bella hasn't even showered yet!"
My breathing settles and Alice's words drift in through my lust-induced fog. She is totally right. Unfortunately.
"Baby," I say, shimming out from under him and sitting up against the headboard. The movement puts his face level with my belly. Hearing the tone of my voice, he lets out a pathetic whimper of misery before collapsing with his forehead against my stomach. "She is right," I continue, chuckling at his dramatics as I run my fingers through his hair.
"Mahumph," is his muffled reply.
"I know you don't want to go. But we won't stay long after midnight. I just want to go dance with you for a while and then do the whole countdown with all of our friends. Then we can come straight back here, and I'll let you fuck me until sun up. Okay?"
"Ogahh," he says, still not moving.
"You are so wise, Bella," puts in Alice, still listening on the other side of the door. "And it has to be a quick shower. None of that conserving water horseshit. I want to leave in half an hour! Oh, and I left your dress hanging in the bathroom."
I hear Alice leave before Edward rolls off me with a dramatic sigh.
"Fucking stupid twin," he mutters, glaring at the ceiling again. I lean over him, hovering over his face until he closes his eyes, allowing me to kiss each eyelid.
"It's going to be a good night, sweetheart," I tell him. "Suck it up!"
Throwing the covers back, I try to slide out of bed, but Edward covers me up again.
"What are you doing? Cover yourself, Isabella," he demands, pulling the sheet to hide my nudity.
"What the fuck are you doing?" I reply, glaring at him and swatting his hands away. "I'm just going to the backroom. Do you suddenly not want to see me naked?"
"The cat will see you," he whispers, still covering my private bits with his body and the sheets. At first I think he must be joking, or using this as an excuse to prolong our contact a little longer. But then I glance down to the foot of the bed where Waldo is studying in intently, his furry ginger head cocked to the side.
"You are being ridiculous," I say. "Waldo is just a cat. We were about to do it in front of him."
"An unfortunate oversight on my part," he replies. "If I was thinking clearly, I would have kicked him out. It's creepy, the way he watches you."
"Okay, that's enough with the crazy train. I'm going to shower." I finally manager to weasel my way out of Edward's grip before sauntering naked to the bathroom. I turn as I reach the door and giggle when I see both Edward and Waldo staring at me with the same, head to the side, big eyed expression. "Waldo really is the Edward of cats," I declare.
"Whatever," Edward says, throwing my long ago discarded undies at me. "Just take a shower, cat lady."
"Come on, slow poke," I say, pulling Edward through the throngs of people crammed into Jake's house. It's nearly eleven when we arrive, and I need to locate the host to wish him a happy New Year. My boy drags his feet, not thrilled at being forced to mingle with my ex-boyfriend/current best friend. "Let's find Jake so we can get our grove on."
I grind against him for a moment, causing him to glare at me before marching off towards the kitchen again. He is so ridiculously cranky tonight, and I wonder if something else is going on. Maybe something happened in Forks that has him all moody.
Eventually we locate Jake, sipping on a drink and laughing with Quil and Embry. Moving away from Edward, I rush across the kitchen before throwing myself into Jake's arms. The force of my hug knocks him back into the counter and he lets out a strangled "umph" and chuckles as he returns my greeting.
"Hey, BabysBells," he slurs, lifting me off the ground and crushing my ribs. "Happyyy New Year!"
The stupid drunk bastard is obviously way ahead of me, and I move to pour a couple of drinks when he finally sets me down.
"Ditto, Jakey," I reply, handing a whiskey drink to Edward and mixing a vodka concoction for myself. "Great party. How many of these people do you actually know?"
"I would say somewhere 'round a fifth," he replies, steadying himself with a hand on the counter while the boys laugh at his drunkenness behind his back. "More now that your crowed has arrived. Rosie and Jazz and Em and Alice here too?"
"Yup," I say with a nod, moving back to Edward's side. Jake notices my boy for the first time and glares, crossing his arms over his chest. Edward mirrors his position, and I sigh heavily. Every time I get the two of them together, they have this pissy little man contest. One of these days they are bound to get a long but I suppose today is not the day.
"Welcome to thee party, bloodsucker," Jake says with a smirk.
This ridiculous nickname emerged some time last year when I wasn't paying attention. And although they claim to hate each other, I think they secretly enjoy their weird little competition. They don't have a lot in common, but I think they could actually be friends if they tried.
"Thanks for having me, mongrel," Edward snaps back, offering a hand which Jake squeezes. This is the usual pissing match. Whoever winces first is the wimpy loser with a small penis.
This time, neither of them winces before Jake deteriorates into somewhat hysterical laugher. I join him, because this puffed up chest routine, manly man shit is so absurd. I wrap my arm around Edward's waist, and his hand settles on my shoulder. Somehow the conversation turns pleasant. We continue drinking, talking, and laughing, and somehow it comes out that both Edward and Jake were track stars in high school. They drunkenly decide they must race, but alas there is no room in the crowded house.
My money is on Edward. Jake smokes too much weed.
Eventually, Jake gets distracted by some girl and I drag Edward towards our friends on the dance floor. Edward's hands find my hips, and we move together to the bumping beats of shity pop hits. I dance with Rose and Alice, generally just being goofy.
I have a grand old time. I belong here. These are my people.
Edward pulls me outside to get a little fresh air and privacy. Without looking around, he pushes me up against a wall on the front porch, capturing my lips. I laugh at his concentration as I wrap my arms around his shoulders. Pretty soon, there is no laughter in me, only lust and need. Moaning into his mouth, I hitch my knee around his hip to pull him closer.
"I love this dress," he murmurs, kissing down between my tits. Alice did pick a dozy. Its black, low cut, and so tight I can barely breathe. The sleeves are long, and it's basically backless. Its real fancy, which is the norm for New Years apparently, but I paired it with converse, much to Alice's dismay.
Edward looks just as good in a typical nerdy yet sexy ensemble. Charcoal pants, pinstripe button up, black vest, slip on Vans sneakers. He looks so divine.
"Same," I agree, using his hair to keep him close. He lifts me completely off the ground, kissing me again.
"Let's go home," he mutters.
"Always in such a rush," I reply with a chuckle, closing my eyes and letting my head fall back against the brick as he moves to kiss my throat. "It's ten minutes till midnight. Then we'll go home."
"Ouch, denied." Oh, dear. I recognize that voice. Edward slowly lowers me to the ground, and I see the blazing end of a cigarette in the shadows of the front deck. He turns his head to glare over his shoulder at the irrupting creepier while shielding my body as I fix my dress.
"Come on, Edward," I say, not wanting to deal with all the negative that is sure to come from this interaction. "It's almost midnight."
"Now whose in a rush, Isabella?" says the seemingly disembodied voice, stopping Edward as I drag him towards the door. I continue to tug on his sleeve. There is no budging and I really want a cigarette.
"Excuse me?" Edward demands aggressively scowling into the dark. "Who're you, you eavesdropping little pervert."
And of course, because the universe hates me, James materializes with his usual smirk.
"Fuck," I mutter as Edward face turns murderous and his body tenses.
"Hey, Bella," he says. "Long time no see. Its been what? A year and a half ago? Ah good times."
"Don't fucking talk to her," Edward hisses, taking a step towards James. I latch on to his elbow, really not wanting to deal with Edward gets punched round two. Not that he didn't do some fine punching last time, but still.
"Yeah, long time. Not so good memories, but yeah, whatever," I say, getting in front of Edward and shoving him backwards. Somehow we get inside, and I pull the door closed behind us.
"Hit me up if you want a reminder of what its like to be with a real man!" he calls just as I slam the front door.
"Come on," I say, dragging Edward towards the packed living room/dance floor. He seems a little shocked and follows me willingly. I wrap my arms around his neck, kissing the memory of James right out of him. Or at least I try. When I pull away his brow is furrowed. I recognize that look. The gears are turning in that far to perceptive brain of his. This cannot be good for me.
But then Champaign is passed around, and someone starts the countdown. I smile up at Edward slyly, silently pleading for him to just let this go. After another moment of deep contemplation, he clinks his plastic glass against mine, pulling me close as the seconds tick away.
I don't, and can't, think about anything else when his lips are on mine. I nibble on his lower lip causing him to groan and force his tongue into my mouth.
"I love you, Isabella," he murmurs, his forehead resting upon mine. I can't even be upset or respond at all because he has succeeded in kissing me senseless. My mind is all foggy. "Happy New Year."
"Take me home," I demand, pleased that he does just what I request.
January 1, 2008
"I can feel you staring at me," I say with a smile without even opening my eyes. Edward and I spent New Year's Day in bed, and I was attempting to take a little nap in the mid-after noon sun streaming in through the window.
"You're too beautiful. To not look at you would be a travesty," he replies, kissing my temple. Humming in pleasure, I wiggle closer until there is no space between us. I'm secure within the circle of his arms. My head rests on his shoulder and one legs lays between his.
"This day is perfect," I murmur, keeping my eyes closed.
"Breakfast in bed was a real highlight," he agrees, pressing his nose into my hair.
"I was more referring to all the sex, but yeah. I do make a mean Denver omelet," I reply.
"All the sex is always excellent," he says softly. "I love you."
"Edward," I admonish, burrowing into his chest to avoid reality. "Don't ruin my perfect day."
"Oh dear," he replies, sounding seriously fucking concerned.
"What?" I ask warily, slowly lifting my head to get a good look at him.
"You're not going to like what I want to talk to you about," he admits, looking guilty.
"I knew it!" I declare sitting all the way up and pulling the sheet with me to cover my nudity. "You have been fucking grumpy as shit since you got back from Forks. I knew something unpleasant happened. So just spill it. Fucking lay it on me so we can go back to the perfect part."
"Shit," Edward mutters under his breathing, sitting up and turning slightly in bed to face me. "When did you get so perceptive? I wasn't even planning on telling you about Forks."
His statement confuses me. If he wasn't going to tell me about Forks, what the fuck did he have to say that would ruin my perfect day?
"But there is really no reason not to tell you," he says to himself, before looking back at me. Obviously he has made a decision, and I brace myself for what he has to say. "Despite my frequent and vocal reminders to my family that I have a girlfriend who makes me very happy," I roll my eyes at this but he presses on without comment, "My grandpa actually tried to set me up with someone this Christmas."
Resisting the urge to punch him and quelling my ridiculous jealousy, I take a deep breath. "How is that even possible?" I ask, so calm I even impress myself. "You were gone for a total of six days. Who does your grandpa even know in Washington to set you up with?"
"Well, that's the worst part. He brought along this girl, Rachel, to join us for the holidays. I still don't really get what her story is or how she knows my family, but the bottom line is she was going to be alone so Grandpa Cullen paid for her ticket to join our family. I didn't even get that the whole thing was a set up until like day three when she had too much eggnog and was all over me. My mom was pissed."
"There is so much wrong with what you just said, I don't even know where to begin," I hiss out, fisting my hands in the sheets in my anger. "She stayed at your house? She tried to kiss you? What the fuck? Why didn't you tell me any of this sooner?"
"Please, Bella. Don't blow this out of proportion. Nothing happened. The most disturbing part to me is my extended family's complete disregard for my feelings and wishes. My whole life, I've done exactly what was expected of me. Got good grades, got into a good school, am studying to be a doctor. But they can't get their hands on my love life. This is mine. And I choose you."
"They don't think I'm good enough," I state. Edward winces, but doesn't deny the accuracy of my words.
"They want the perfect little debutante with familial connections and old money. Somehow, both Alice and Emmett are succeeding on that front, and they are trying to force me into that life too."
"They're right, Edward," I murmur, feeling a little dazed.
"Don't be ridiculous, Bella," he scoffs. "I want you. I choose you. I need you."
"But you shouldn't. God. How long have I been saying that I'm no good for you? That someone out there is capable of giving you everything you want, but instead you are wasting your time on me. You deserve a real girlfriend," I shout, unhappy because I know without doubt that my words are true. And I hate it.
"You could be my girlfriend," he suggests hopefully.
"No, I can't," I say with finality as his face falls. "Really, Edward. I don't know why you put up with me. You should find yourself a nice, emotionally stable girl who will date you. And then marry you. And then have a whole bunch of babies with you."
"Is that what you want?" he whispers.
I stay silent for a long time. This is a golden opportunity. If I tell him I'm unhappy, he'll let me go and we both might come out unscathed. It would be the right thing to do. The good thing to do. I should let him go, because he is incapable of seeing our relationship clearly, but I can't. I'm too selfish. I want him too much.
"No," I reply, sounding pissed about it.
He grins and crawls up my body, resting with his hands on either side of my head. I open my legs to accommodate his pelvis, and rest my feet on the back of his calves.
"Isabella," he says quietly, forcing me to look at him with his hand on my chin. "We have been sleeping together regularly for how long? A year and a half?"
I nod, look at him warily.
"Do you want to stop?"
I shake my head adamantly.
"Do you like the way things are? Are you happy?"
I slowly nod again.
"Good." He kisses me soundly on the lips before sitting up, and pulling me with him. I settle into his lap, my legs resting on either side of his thighs. "I don't want to change anything either, so it doesn't have to."
"But your family—"
"Can't tell me what to do anymore," he says, interrupting me. "Plus that's just my extended family. My parents and my siblings just want me to be happy. And you make me happy."
He makes me happy too, but I would never admit this unpleasant fact out loud.
"Just… You have to… Just promise me that if… if you want to date someone… for real… you will. You won't let me stop you, hold you back," I stutter. The thought of him with someone else makes me sick, but I say it anyway because I really do want him to be happy in the long run. I may make him happy now, but it won't last forever.
"Bella—"
"I'm serious, Edward," I say, sitting away from him and shaking him slightly to convey my seriousness. "Please. Just promise me."
He studies me intently for a long, tense moment before sighing heavily and nodding once. "Fine. I promise if I ever want another girl, I'll date her."
I let out my own sigh, this one in relief. His promise appeases some of my guilt for being selfish enough to try to keep him at all. Even if it's just for a little while. "Thank you," I murmur into his neck, stroking his hair as he rocks me slightly.
"But I still think of you as my girlfriend. You are my girlfriend," he says. I just sigh, choosing not to respond. This is another fight I am tired of having.
This perfect day just got real scary real quick, and the tension slowly leaves my body as I relax back into Edward. For now, he's still mine. For now, he is right here. But then I remember that Forks isn't even what he originally wanted to talk about, and my stomach knots again.
Regretfully, I crawl out of his lap and wrap the sheet around my body again.
"What did you want to talk about?" I ask, even though I feel like I'm better off not knowing.
"Oh. Right. That." His reply is gruff.
"What, Edward?" I encourage.
"Well… I know you're not going to like it. But I wanted to talk to you about James."
Aw, shit.
"Aw, shit," I mutter rubbing my palms over my face as I prepare myself for what's coming.
"He said some things last night that really bugged me," he says, frowning.
"Oh?" I ask, trying to sound innocent.
"Yeah. We got in that fight around two years ago but he said it has been a year and a half since you've seen him. And then he referred to all those memories, like you spent a considerable amount of time with him, not just the one night. And then, most telling if you ask me, that last thing he yelled about being a real man just did not sit well with me at all." He has officially gone into science, fact-presenting mode. He is using the fucking scientific process on me. Edward does this to distance himself emotionally from the unpleasant, and I can't even call him on it, because I do the same thing all the goddamn time. Avoidance. We are damn good at it.
"Alright. I guess its time I came clean about this shit," I say with great reluctance. Edward face pales, and all that guilt is back. Maybe after this he will finally go find the good girl. "The summer after freshmen year, right after we fucked for the first time? Remember?"
"Oh course I remember, Isabella," he murmurs, taking my hand. "Its one of the best days of my life."
I smile and blush because I honestly feel the same way.
"Anyway. Right after you went home for the summer I may or may not have spent a couple weeks hanging out with James," I confess in a rush, as if somehow hearing the words super fast will make them less painful.
"Oh really?" he says, yanking his hand away from mine, crossing his arms over his chest, and leaning back against the headboard. "And what exactly did you two do?"
"Mostly we partied. Got hamered and high. And I'll be honest with you, we did fool around a bit." Edward looks livid and I quickly continue in an attempt to calm him down. "But no sex! I promise you there was no sex. Truth be told, and I'm not exactly proud of this, I haven't been with anyone since you."
"Since me?" he asks, looking hopeful now.
"Yeah, since out first time way back when we were freshies. It's only been you," I say, crawling into his lap again.
"Really?" he asks, sounding so young and looking so adorably innocent.
"Really," I assure him as I wrap my arms around his neck. "And even before that, I only ever really wanted you. When I was sleeping around and being a bitch to you, I wanted you. When you were with Kate, goddamn did I want you. Every moment we were in the library, I wanted nothing more than to fuck you right there. It just about drove me crazy."
I don't know where I'm finding all this strength to be so forthcoming. Usually, I keep the emotional shit on lock, buried down so deep I forget it exists at all. But I can't do that with Edward. He probably guessed all this anyway. I'm simply providing the evidence for a well thought out hypothesis.
"But then you caved," he says, beaming at me now. All the discomfort in my confession was worth it to see him like this. "You stopped fighting me."
"And what a good decision that was. Well, it actually wasn't even really a decision. More like an all powering need for your cock."
He rolls his eyes at this but a smirk plays around his lips.
"I am a real man," he insists, somewhat petulantly.
"Don't need to tell me that, baby," I whisper against his lips. "You prove it me all the damn time."
"Actually," he says, kissing the side of my neck and rolling his hips. "I think have some proving to do right now."
And then he does.
So are they adorable? Or is this just the calm before the storm? Still hatin' on Bella? Or are we finally warming up to her? How much do you wish you had a Waldo of your own? Or a cranky Edward in your bed?
Thanks for reading! Please share your thoughts!
On side note, many reviews are the best form of writing motivation. Just sayin.