Chapter 18

Spencer's POV

My life back to California it was strange at first, but yet it came to its normal rhythms after some time.. It had to.. I was feeling lost and I have to say that I still feel like that sometimes.. I might hear something or see something and then it will take me back.. It wasn't easy but I was glad I had my parents to help me..

My dad was telling me that I needed to make a step every day and that I did.. It was hard but I did it.. It was easy to find a job to a hospital especially after coming back from war.. So my rhythms came to normal when I started to work as a doctor again after being away from medicine for three months..

Those months I was waiting every day to see the mailman just in case he had a letter to give to me.. But every day he would come empty handed.. I won't say I wasn't disappointed.. I was.. But it was something that I realized it wouldn't happen.. Ashley totally forgot about me.. She was back to her life and her husband.. And as she let me go I needed to let her go as well.. It was time.. That was when I decided to go back and do what I knew I was good at..

Two weeks after I came back Alex contacted me.. She knew I was back and she wanted to see me.. I thought at first not to see her but at the end she was someone I really cared for and I was in a relationship with her for two years.. She might have hurt me but who was I not to forgive.. From the other hand I wanted to ask her so many questions and I needed some answers..

We met to a near café next to her house.. When I arrived there she was already waiting for me.. She stood up from where she was sitting and made a step to hug me but she stopped..

"Spencer.. Hi.."

"Hey"

"Thanks for seeing me today.."

"Why I shouldn't?" I said and sat to the opposite chair of hers..

"I am glad you are ok.." it was four years later after our break up.. She seemed older but yet she was the same girl I left behind..

"So how are you?"

"I am good. I am working as a journalist to the local newspaper now"

"Nice"

"How are you?"

"That needs time and a coffee can not explain how I am and what I feel.. All I can say is that I am here and alive"

"Of course"

"Alex, I need to ask you some things and I need you to answer to me truly" she didn't answer.. Instead she nodded.. "Four years ago, you said you would wait but after some months you send me a letter telling me that you couldn't wait and that you found someone else.. Two years together Alex.. We were two years together and yet you break up with me like that.. Why?"

"Spencer.. I.. don't know what to say"

"Why you called me? Why you wanted to meet me? I don't find any reason"

"I lied"

"You lied? About what?"

"I didn't find anyone.. How could I when I was totally in love with you.. I still am.. But it was the only excuse.. I couldn't bare the thought that something would happen to you and I couldn't wait.. I am not that person.. What if something happened to you?"

"Are you kidding me right now? What if I was dead? Then I would die knowing that you broke up with me because you met someone else.."

"I know.. I know.. I am stupid.. But Spence.." she said and touched my hand.. "I never stopped loving you.."

"I wish I could say the same about you.. I am sorry Alex"

"What that suppose to mean?"

"It means that I moved on with my life.. If you are asking for forgiveness or anything I forgive you.. But I am sorry, I can't be with you.."

"You moved on? You mean.."

"Yes, I mean.. I met someone else.."

"Who is she?"

"Does this really matter? I don't think it does.. So, it was nice seeing you.. I hope you find what you want.. Maybe we will see again.. Who knows.. Till then, take care.."

I didn't look back.. I just walked away from her.. And that was eight months ago..

I was looking outside the window thinking of Ashley again.. Sometimes I catch myself thinking of her.. I shouldn't but she still holds my thoughts.. But my thoughts were interrupted by a nurse when she walked inside my office..

"Dr Carlin, we need you at the operation room.."

"I am coming right away"

Feather River Hospital was one of the bests and when I applied there for job they called me the next day.. I was twenty seven but I was already more experienced from all the others at my age..

"What we have here?"

"They just brought him here.. He had a heart attack.."

"Do you know his name?"

"I don't know.."

"Go find out then.. Now"

"Yes, doctor"

When I finished medicine I thought about following general medicine but cardiology always fascinated me.. So now I was a resident at cardiology and I loved the fact that it was keeping me away from whom I shouldn't think..

After two hours at the operation room the surgery was successful and the patient was already in his room recovering..

"Anita? Did you find his name?"

"No, doctor. He didn't have any identification on him.. No wallet was found.. Maybe they robbed him.."

"Ok, thanks.. I guess we will have to wait for him to wake up so we can ask some questions.."

The man was at his early thirties and him having a heart attack wasn't a surprise.. He didn't seem someone who would live on the street.. But we had to wait for him to wake up and give us some answers..

The last days I was sleeping at the hospital.. Didn't have time to go home.. I only went to change clothes and then I was back here again.. My day consisted of doing my morning and night rounds, operating, and then the same again.. If I was needed I was there.. Back in war I did pretty much everything and they knew..

"Dr Carlin.. I am sorry.. The patient is waking up if you want to see him.."

"Thanks Anita"

I walked to room 405 where we had him and indeed he was up.. I didn't want to ask him while he was being like that.. Instead I checked his vitals..

"Hello sir.. I am doctor Carlin and I was your surgeon.. You suffered a heart attack and we had to operate you.. Can you tell me how you feel?"

"Shore"

"Of course.. Can you tell me what happened?"

"My wife.."

"What about your wife?"

"She.. doesn't know.. They.."

"Sir, sir.. Can you hear me?" Immediately I went right next to him.. I checked his vitals and he was out.. Most of the patients after a surgery like that couldn't take the pain and they were cases where they would faint.. He was one of those cases.. I asked for a nurse to come to give him the right drugs.. Tonight I couldn't ask him.. Tomorrow I would..

Like all the other nights I slept on the couch of my office.. First thing I did next morning was to go and check my patient but first I had to finish my rounds.. When I got to his room he was awake.. He seemed better than yesterday.. Hopefully today he could answer my questions..

"Goodmorning sir"

"Goodmorning"

"Do you remember me?"

"Yes, the surgeon. Dr Carlin"

"How are you feeling today?"

"Same as yesterday"

"Could you tell me what happened?"

"I remember two men with a gun.. A pain on my chest.. And then I was down.. I can't remember anything else.."

"We couldn't find any ID of yours to fill the papers.. Could you tell me your name sir?"

"Aiden Dennison"

TBC

Reviews are always welcome