Hello I know it's been absolutely ages its just I've had an absolutely terrible time at the moment. First my memory stick broke and because my laptop was being taken away for repairs everything of mine was on it so I lost all the chapters I had been writing for all my stories. So now I'm rewriting things and editing the existing chapters on so that everything is up to date and to the best quality.

Hope you dont mind me editing the end of this chapter. Its just Bella realised her feelings too quickly :) xx

Chapter 2

EPOV

I bent down and stared at her face, twisted with pain and hurt. Her face was as white as or whiter than mine. And then she began breathing.

I gasped in relief and carefully lifted her up into my arms restraining myself, using every ounce of strength I had, which is what I should have done before. I should have tried harder to control myself, but I was already hungry, I should have hunted sooner.

I would never forgive myself for what I had done to this girl, never, not even after three hundred years. Never.

I carried her swiftly towards my car, being careful not to crush her in my arms. I placed her in my car and sped off towards my house where Carlisle was for his supposed lunch break.

I hated myself for what I had done to the girl next to me. If only I had been strong enough to resist then she wouldn't be fighting for her life. I reached the house in no time at all and rushed to get the poor girl inside.

"Carlisle!" I nearly screamed as Bella stopped breathing. I carried her into the living room just as Carlisle along with Esme came down in a flash and stared horror stricken at the bleeding girl.

"I'm so sorry. I couldn't help it. She smelled just like the way those girls did to Emmett, I couldn't resist her. I'm so sorry." I sobbed tearlessly as Carlisle took her out of my arms and rushed upstairs.

"I'll do all I can." He told me as he placed her in his room.

Esme put her arm around me and began worrying about whether we would have to move again soon. She rubbed my shoulder, "Everything will be fine. We'll be fine. No matter what. Don't worry yourself too much. It's not your fault." She soothed even though I didn't deserve any type of sympathy.

"Esme, I'm not worried about whether we'll have to move. I'm worried that she won't make it." I confessed.

Esme put her head on my shoulders and lead me to the couch where I lay down and stared blankly at the white wall, too ashamed to look her in the eye.

I sat on the porch steps and stared out at the dim forest trying to come to terms with what had happened.

She had survived but for the sake of her sanity and our safety she had been told of our 'secret' and sworn to secrecy. Surprisingly she seemed sincere when she promised not to say a word to anybody. But then how would I know, I couldn't read her mind. But there was something else. She didn't seem scared of us. She seemed quite calm around us and content.

"Edward?"

I hadn't heard her approach but now I could smell her. I turned slowly on the step and looked up into her chocolate brown eyes.

I didn't think there would have been any other way around what I had done, she had to be told. I had made a mess of our life. I had to keep my distance though. There wasn't anything I could do about that.

"Go away." I replied a little too harshly than I intended.

She hung her head, "Carlisle said I'm going to have to stay here for a few days. I thought I'd come and tell you myself."

I turned my back on her.

"I'm sorry." She said.

I scoffed, "Why are you sorry? I'm the one who nearly killed you. Right?"

"I came to tell you that I don't hold anything against you and then you act like this," She sounded mad so I turned back to her to see tears falling down her cheeks.

"I don't care if you nearly killed me. You saved me as well. You didn't want me to die, did you? That's why you saved me." She cried.

"I didn't save you. Carlisle did." I said.

"No, because you could've killed me and left me to die. But you didn't." She argued.

I got up and looked her right in the eye, she diverted my gaze.

"Look into my eyes." I told her. She continued to look at the floor, so I walked up to her and gently turned her face to mine with my hand.

"Look at my eyes. Look at the colour. That tells everybody around that I'm dangerous, a killer. Please grasp that and leave me alone." I pleaded pointing to my blood red eyes with my other hand.

"You won't hurt me." She said.

I laughed, "I think the reason you're here is proof enough that that isn't true."

She jerked her face away from my hand and ran inside crying.

What was I doing? Why did I feel compelled to scare this girl away from me when, deep down I didn't want to. I actually wanted her to like me. But it was too dangerous. That's what I had to keep telling myself. It was dangerous to be close to her. Even if it was what she wanted? If it was what I wanted.

BPOV

"Dad, I'm fine. Honestly, the Cullens are really nice and Alice is really just amazing. She's made me feel so welcomed." I told him, sighing slightly when I heard him sigh in relief.

"When are you coming home?" He sounded anxious, as if he was already missing me.

I bit my lip, "Erm . . . That's the thing, I was wondering, no sorry, Alice was wondering if I could stay a few more days? If that's ok with you?" I told him, waiting for his resounding no, but he hesitated.

"Bella. You've been gone three days already. I'm really starting to miss you." He sounded embarrassed as he said this, I could just imagine his cheeks going pick at this very second.

"Oh, please. Alice is really nice and told me I'm the only proper friend she's made here. I can't just leave her. Please? We're having fun," Ok the last part was a lie but the first part wasn't. Alice had always wanted to make new friends but with her family's situation it was impossible for her to. Alice had kind of really taken to me being here as her supposed guest rather too much.

"Alright, fine. But no more than two days, ok?" Charlie was amazing. He was also easy to lie to, sometimes too easy. So why was it I found it so damn hard to lie to Edward?

"Thank you so much!" I exclaimed, "I love you, bye dad,"

"See you soon Bells, love you too," He hung up.

This was a lot harder than I first had thought, lying and pretending everything was fine when it really wasn't. I had only just moved back with Charlie and I was already lying and being completely dishonest to him. But then again if I didn't the whole town would know that the Cullens were vampires and would probably be burned at the stake or staked or shot at with a silver bullet or something traditional. I flinched at the thought of somebody staking Edward. This thought scared me more than it should.

I walked down the stairs to hear beautiful music playing on the piano downstairs. I sat on the stairs near the top, hiding between the bars and listened, swaying my head gently to the music and then very subtly peaked down to see his pale fingers glide over the keys effortlessly, filling the house with his beautiful composition.

I sighed and the music stopped abruptly.

He had heard me. That was great.

Ever since I had woken up, Edward had tried to avoid me at all costs. I gave him the space he needed when it was necessary and appropriate but sometimes he was so damn rude to his family and me that I would follow him into different rooms, making it look inconspicuous so he didn't get suspicious. I actually felt really guilty when he ran out of a room abruptly, knowing it was me that had done it, me that was causing him to be so miserable, so much so that he couldn't take it any longer. He was so miserable around me, I'm going to guess he wasn't like that before I got here, he was probably happy and playful, messing around with his brothers who would probably tease each other all the time. He wasn't like that now. He didn't even look at his brothers now.

Today was different though, because today I now knew that not only was I making him unhappy but that I was causing him real physical pain and that his throat burned with the thirst of my blood every time I was near. Carlisle had only just told me because he didn't think it was his right to tell me and that Edward should instead, but after seeing me sulk around the house for days now Carlisle said it was better if I knew everything, so I could help Edward and so that I understood why he was being so rude to me. And to help him I had to do the thing which would hurt me the most; staying away from him.

I stood up quickly and ran swiftly down the stairs, hoping to avoid his gaze but what I wasn't expecting was to end up bounding right into him. He steadied me and smiled slightly. That was the first time I'd seen him smile.

"What are you doing?" He asked me pleasantly, not at all as harsh as I would of thought he would have.

"I-I er . . . was going to erm . . . talk to, erm Esme, when I heard you playing and . . . I'm so s-sorry." I stuttered at him.

He smiled again, "Are you scared of me?

I looked down and tried to get past him. I wasn't going to answer that, not if my answer angered him - I liked the happy Edward, "I need to -"

"You are, aren't you?" He said, he sounded quite happy by my reaction.

I didn't reply.

How was I supposed to tell him that I wasn't scared of him, I was scared that he might leave and I might never see him again. What was wrong with me? I deserved to be shot at for just thinking of that, preferably by Edward, so that I could see his beautiful face as I died. Urgh! I was so stupid!

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