Hey guys.. No excuses for not having a chapter all these days.. I just didn't feel like writing.. Thank you all for your reviews..
Chapter 24
Spencer's POV
Three months, fifteen days and thirty four hours since she left and went back to New York.. But who is counting..
While Ashley was in California it was easy. I could see her at the hospital in the morning and then we would meet at her hotel at night. She told me about what happened with Aiden and that he was questioning her about me and her. At first I got panicked.. I didn't want to cause any problems at my work and Aiden was still my patient.. So I decided to stop being his doctor.. He was already in recovery and what I was supposed to do was already done. When I told him, he was curious, I could see it in his eyes.. And Ashley being there as well didn't help..
It was three days after what happened that I found myself inside his room telling him the news..
"Mr Dennison, you are doing great. Your vitals are back to normal and as I see it you will be out soon and you will go back to your life and your work"
"Thanks Doctor"
"If you need anything I will be here. Just tell a nurse and they will find me"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that I am no longer your doctor. You are arranged to go to recovery so you will have another doctor till you leave from California"
"But you did the surgery"
"I did, and you are getting better day by day. But these are the rules of the hospital Mr Dennison. But whatever happens, I'll be here if you need me"
He didn't say anything.. Nor Ashley.. They both stayed silent till I was out of the room.. It was the right thing to do.. And there was nothing else I could do.. The same day I didn't see Ashley at all at the hospital but I didn't have the time either to look for her.. Instead she came and found me while I was ready to leave..
"Spence? Can I come in?" I turned and nodded.. I was so tired that I couldn't even answer to her simple question. She sat on the couch and didn't look at me, nor talked to me till I was the one who initiated it..
"What is going on?"
"Why you stopped being Aiden's doctor? Now he is more suspicious. He kept asking me questions once you left"
"I had to. First, because my job is finished. Aiden now needs to go to recovery.. So that's why.. And second because of what happened.. Ashley, understand that my place is difficult."
"I understand.. I just.. I don't know what to do Spence. I am just scared.. What if he knows something?"
"Then ask him"
"I can't do that.. Ask him what? What do you know about me and Spencer?"
"I am sorry but I can't help you on that Ash.. It's your life and you have to find your answers to the questions you ask" she came next to me and held my hands while she was looking at me..
"But you are in my life as well.."
"As what exactly? Because I don't know what we are.."
"Why you are saying that?"
"Because it's the truth Ash.. You are married, you love Aiden, but you are not in love with him, you say that you love me and you are in love with me but yet you are afraid to ask for a divorce because you are settled in your life.. So I am a little confused here if you don't mind me saying" of course she didn't say anything.. What she could really say? She knew that that was the truth.. And I was falling deeper and deeper for her and inside I knew that she wouldn't do what she promised me a while ago..
"Can we please go?"
"We? Tonight I am going to stay with my parents.. I am sorry.. You should stay here with your husband or go back and relax at your room.. We will talk tomorrow"
"Why you are being like that Spence? Why? Can't you see that I am struggling as well? Can't you see that this is not easy for me?"
"Sweetie, nothing is easy in this life.. We make our choices.. I made mine a long time ago.. I know what I want, and who I want.. I told you before that I am willing to wait for you but I don't know for how long Ash.. I am sorry.. Especially when I don't know what we are.. Friends? Girlfriends? Lovers? Acquaintances? What?"
"I don't know.. I just don't know.."
"And that's why I am not coming with you tonight.. So see you tomorrow" I kissed her forehead and left her there..
As I was walking to my car I was thinking everything I told her.. Maybe I was harsh, maybe only with that way she could understand that her choices were affecting me as well.. Ashley was scared.. I understood that.. It's not that I was out to my parents as well.. I never meant for her to go and out herself to everyone she knew.. I would never do that to her.. But I just wanted to know that behind our close doors it would be me and her.. Us.. And I wouldn't care if I couldn't touch her hand while we were out, or kiss her.. Because at night she would be mine and I would be hers.. But I was feeling that Ashley wasn't ready to do that step either..
My excuse to my parents for not being home all these days was that I had lot of work at the hospital.. Seeing me stepping inside was a surprise for them.. A nice one if I might say.. My mom and dad were eating their dinner and immediately both of them stood up from their seats and hugged me.. My mom went inside the kitchen and brought another plate for me to eat with them.. They had my favorite.. Roast with mashed potatoes..
"Why you didn't call Spence?"
"I didn't have time mom.. Sorry"
"Oh, no.. It's ok. It's just that if I knew I would make something better"
"I like roast as well.. I am good.."
"How are you Spence?"
"Tired dad.. Just tired.."
"Is everything ok?"
"I guess it is.."
"You don't seem like everything is ok" my dad knew me so well.. Beside our fights he could easily read me and we were both the same..
"Whatever that is it will be ok at the end.. So don't worry dad"
I enjoyed my parents company till it was time for them to sleep.. I from the other hand couldn't.. I did go and laid down on my bed though with thoughts of her.. Like her, I was starting questioning myself.. Why I said I would wait for her when she was clearly not ready? Why I was so deep in love when she couldn't return the same love back? Why I was thinking of her and I was crying at the same time? Without knowing I turned on my side and looked outside the window.. At some point I fell asleep..
Days later the situation was the same.. Since I was no longer Aiden's doctor I wasn't around and I couldn't see Ashley.. Instead it was her that was searching for me most of the times.. At night I wouldn't go at her room so pretty much we were seeing each other only a few minutes a day.. Yes, I missed her but I had to keep distance because I was afraid that she would break my heart..
After one month Aiden was ready to leave.. Ashley tried many times to tell me that we wouldn't have time again.. That she would leave.. That she needed me.. But I didn't go by her hotel.. Only the last day before she was ready to leave.. She said that she would wait for me at her room.. And that is where I headed after work..
When I knocked the door she seemed sad but she put her hands around me like she hadn't see me for days.. She held me close and I felt her lips on my neck.. I wanted so much to kiss her but I didn't..
"Thank you for coming.. I missed you.." she said and took my hand guiding me inside.. "Why you were being distant Spence?"
"Because.. I had to.."
"We lost weeks of being together.. Weeks of kissing you and being with you.." and she came closer, sitting right next to me, playing with my fingers.. She was wearing a silk Chinese robe and her hair was down.. She smelled so good.. What she was trying to do?
"How's your husband?"
"Let's not talk about Aiden tonight.. Ok? Please.."
"Ash.."
I didn't say anything else because her lips were on mine.. She was kissing me so passionately that although she took me of guard, I didn't stop it because I wanted to do the same thing exactly.. We were on her bed with her being on top of me kissing me everywhere she could.. I was getting turned on only with her being on top of me.. When she put her hands under my shirt cupping my breasts I was lost.. I was lost in lust and to everything that was her.. I knew what she was doing.. I knew what that night was but I didn't stop it.. Instead I let it happen..
TBC
Reviews are always welcome