Accidental Infatuation

Chapter Six

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"Sora?" Roxas looks over at me, the hurt in his voice obvious to anyone, but it stands out to me. Because I was the one who caused it.

"I want to say I told you so…" I trail off, my fingers clutching tight on the black steering wheel. I can't help but be pissed off at everything right now. Roxas, myself, that Prick, hell, I even feel pissed off at the old lady crossing the street behind us.

"Sora, don't. I know that I have been fucking up. But it's over now." Roxas tells me, reaching up and placing a hand over his slightly swollen right eye.

I let out a deep sigh. There is no way I can stay mad at my twin. And it really isn't his fault. "Roxy, I'm sorry that I am being such a jerk right now. You've just broken up with your boyfriend. And you're hurt. I'm just making it worse." I receive a small chuckle from him, and I know right away that I am rambling.

"You're acting as if Seifer and I were together forever. It's only been four months, Sor." My blond twin points out, the tension that had been surrounding us only moments ago oddly gone. And that makes me happy. I hate when Roxy and I are fighting.

"Hey, if I had said that yesterday you would have gushed on and on about how you two were so in love and that the last four months had just slipped by." I laugh, keeping my eyes on the road.

I can see out of the corner of my eye that my twin shrugs, a smile trying to force its way onto pouting lips. "I'm sixteen. I'm allowed to be in love one day and out of love the next."

"I still can't believe that he hit you, Roxy. What happened exactly? Why did he do it?" I finally ask the question that has been plaguing me since I got the distraught phone call from my twin an hour ago.

"I wasn't putting out, so he tried to bully it from me."

"He was going to rape you?!" I scream, now even more pissed off at the blond bastard my brother just broke up with. My knuckles turn white from the relentless grip that I have on the wheel.

"Settle down!" his voice is firm and startles me into compliance. Roxas is never the one to take charge like this. "He never even got my shirt off before I kneed him in the crotch and bolted. That's when I called you."

I let out a sigh of relief. I'm glad that he can take care of himself, but he has to realize that he's not invincible. One day he is going to get hurt, and I can't help but think that that day is closer than either of us think.

"Why don't you trust my opinion?" I look over at him briefly, sulking against the door, his face pressed against the cool glass.

"Of course I do. Your opinion is just as important as my own. You know that." A frown comes over my golden twin's features, and I know that for the second time this evening, I have hurt my brother with my words. And it makes me feel like crap.

But I need to hear his explanation on this. "Then why when I told you that I didn't like Seifer, did you still continue to date him? All you ever told me was that he gave good head. And it's been that way for the last four guys you dated too."

Once again observing from the corner of my eye, I watch as Roxas' frown turns into a glare and a scowl. "You're just jealous, Sora. Just because I lost my virginity two years ago, and you're still a virgin doesn't mean that I will break up with my boyfriends just because you don't like them. You just want to see if you have a chance with them."

I can't take it anymore! With a growl, I pull the car off to the side of the road, before literally throwing the gear shift into park. "Will you listen to yourself, Roxas? You're being a jerk!" I finally turn to face my twin, his cerulean eyes filled with too many emotions to name, but they are all being focused into a glare that is being sent my way.

"Just because you've never had a boyfriend doesn't mean that you should stop me from having one! Just because we are twins doesn't mean that we have to do everything together. We are two separate people, you know!"

"Because the boyfriends that you pick are oh so perfect. And that's why the longest you have ever been in a relationship is five months. And then you always come crying back to me!" We're both screaming at each other, and if anyone knew us, they would know that this is not normal. We've never actually yelled at each other before.

"How will I know what I want if I don't test the waters first?" the glare is bearing down on me, and for some reason, knowledge of that pisses me off even more.

"There is a difference between testing the waters and just fucking around." I growl, unsure where these hurtful words are coming from. My heart is constricting with the pain that we are both feeling, and it is screaming at my mouth to just shut up and forget about everything.

My twin's eyes go wide for a moment, a look of shock appearing momentarily before returning to the hateful scowl. "You know what, Sora? You're a real bitch. How do you think I feel whenever I bring someone home to meet you and the first thing that you tell me is that you don't like them? Makes me feel real special when my own twin brother won't even give them a fucking chance!"

"You've never brought anyone home except the ones who only want to get into your pants! I just let you know what my first impression of them is, which judging by your track record, my opinions and impressions seem to be accurate most of the time!" Tears begin to slide down my cheeks, the thought of arguing to this extent with my other half is a lot harder on me than I am willing to openly admit.

"Just because guys want to sleep with me, and not you doesn't give you the right to judge them like that without getting to know them first!" I finally meet his eyes again and I see a matching set of tear marks trailing down Roxas' flushed cheeks.

"Well, excuse me for wanting to protect my twin brother from assholes like Seifer who only want one thing, and when you don't want it, they fucking try and hit you? I'm sorry if that doesn't fit my description of a good boyfriend." Once again, my voice is laced with malice, and I can't seem to stop these evil words. I just want it to stop!

"The world isn't all sunshine and rainbows, Sora. We aren't all going to get perfect little boyfriends who will bring us chocolates and flowers every day. You have to realize that real life is a bitch, And while we all go about getting fucked over, I'm going to have some fun while doing it!"

"Do you even use condoms, Roxas? Because I know that you've lost count of the number of guys that you slept with." I watch as my twin visibly winces at my statement, and I can tell deep down in the churning pit which is my stomach that our fight is coming to an end, and fast.

"I…well…"And with his stuttering, Roxas turns away from me, our gazes unable to meet once more. And those few broken words hurt me more than anything else that he says this evening in the car.

With a deep sigh, I use the palms of my hands and wipe away the remains of tears on my cheeks and in my eyes. Now I am glad that I decided to pull off to the side of the road. I wouldn't have been able to drive during this. "Roxy, I don't want to be mean, or cruel or anything, but do you honestly think that all those guys that you've slept with have been clean? I can't believe that you don't always use condoms." I mutter the last part, but I know that Roxas has heard me.

"It's not like I never use them." He grumbles, wiping the tears from his face in exactly the same manner I had done only moments earlier. "Sometimes when we are too caught up in the moment, or we've run out and we're too horny to stop and find one." There is no embarrassment in his voice as he tells me this. After all, we do tell each other everything.

"Have you ever thought about what would happen if you caught something, and you got really sick? Or even possibly died?" I whisper, reaching over the centre consol of the car and grasping my twin's hand, needing to feel the comfort after our fight and learning this potentially scary information.

"Isn't thinking that a little extreme?" I see a small smile appear, tugging gently at the corner of Roxy's mouth, unable to push it's way completely onto his lips.

"What would happen to me if you got sick, Roxy?" I feel tears begin to pool at the corners of my eyes again, and using my hand I palm the droplets of water away once more.

I feel the hand trapped in my own squeeze in a sign of reassurance, but in all honesty, it does little to help. "I'm sure that you'd be fine. The first little while it would be hard, but eventually I'm sure that you would be able to move on and continue along with your life." My blond half shrugs, trying to make me feel better, because it's not working.

"Yesterday at school, Olette came up behind me and gave me a hug and I freaked out on her, Roxy, because you were in the bathroom screwing around with Seifer. We've known Olette since we were five. And I still can't handle her touching me unless you are right there with me. You should know that if anything happens to you, it's going to happen to me too." Finally my twin looks back over at me, and the sadness in his sapphire eyes has to be reflected in my own. "I don't want to lose you, Roxy. I can't."

"She knows better than to touch you without me right there." He mumbles, lowering his gaze again at my confession. "I thought that you were getting better at the whole girls thing, Sor?"

I just let out a snort like laughter. "Not really, but the freaking out is not as bad anymore, as long as you are around. At least I don't black out as much anymore. But that's not what we were talking about." I pause, running my free hand through my messy spikes. Now, how do I say what I want to without having Roxas blow up at me and have all this start all over again. "Roxy, promise me that you'll start using protection every time. Not matter how horny you are, promise me that you'll always stop to get one. And I promise to go out and buy you a ton of condoms so that you can't use the excuse that you ran out." My voice has dropped to a whisper, my voice beginning to crack with unshed tears. The thought of my brother being so careless has really hurt me.

"I promise." I hear the hitch in his voice, and I know that he is holding back his own set of tears. "But I want you to promise me something too."

"What is it?" I ask as we look face to face once more, and there is hope shining in his eyes. I know then and there that he will never break his promise. And that makes me happy.

"Promise you'll at least give any other guys that I bring home at least until the second date before you start telling me that you don't like them. At least give them a chance." From the look in his eyes, I realize that I have hurt him by not giving his boyfriends a chance.

"And you'll listen to my opinions if I explain my reasoning?" I add in, receiving a nod of agreement. "Then I promise too."

We say nothing else as we lean over the car and embrace each other in a tight and reassuring hug.

"I love you." We both whisper at the same time, earning chuckles from each of us. It feels so good knowing that we're over the fight. In fact, it feels almost refreshing. As we pull away, I take a glance at my twin's eye. The swelling is still there, but the redness was becoming a deeper shade and I know that in the morning, it will be a lovely shiner. As I examine the forming bruise, I notice Roxas' eyes go wide.

"Roxy?" I ask, curious as to what was causing the reaction. I never got a reply.

"Sora!" was the last thing I heard before the screeching sound of metal being crushed overwhelms all my senses, followed by a blinding white flash of pain, and all I can think of is my twin.

"Sora?" A deep voice, definitely not belonging to my brother is heard in the distance, and reality comes crashing back down on me like a tonne of bricks. And all of a sudden, I feel as if my chest is on fire. I can feel my heart beating rapidly against my chest, and when I notice how fast it is going, I begin to panic.

"He's hyperventilating!" A second voice, also male calls out.

"Make sure he is responsive! I don't want him going into full cardiac arrest!" the first voice has a tone of superiority to it, before I feel a tapping on the side of my face.

"Sora! Come on, Sora! Open your eyes for me." I know I know I recognized that voice, but the blackness in my mind refuses to lift and let my mind work. Somewhere deep in that darkness, I understand the words, and I can feel my inner mind debating on whether or not to listen. On one hand, the darkness is so soothing and tempting, nothing will ever harm me. But if I go back to where this little glimmer of light is shimmering, I might get a chance with Riku. After all, he was the one who kissed me. But would it be worth the chance of being hurt again? My mind battled it out internally before I got fed up listening to the little clones of my voice argue. I took matters into my own hands, the thought of leaving Roxas alone basically made my decision for me.

Slowly, as not to blind myself with the light I know must be blaring down on me, I open my eyes, and all I can see is several large blurs going around me at a frantic pace.

"Sora, squeeze my hand if you can hear me." A voice calls out to me, and vaguely I can feel some pressure on my hand.

Squeeze? I wonder why they want me to do that. Won't it hurt? But I guess that I'll do it anyway, seeing as they asked me to. But I don't want to hurt them, so I only squeeze gently.

"Seph! I got a response over here!"

That voice…I know it? But why? It sounds so familiar.

"Sora, I need you to calm down. Can you do that for me?" The second voice I hear calls out. Sora? Is that my name? Who is this person they want to calm down? I'm calm, in fact, I feel like I am floating. The blurs are all dancing around me, and it's causing that floating feeling to make my stomach churn. Why isn't Roxas here with me? Roxy is supposed to be here with me. Where is he?

"Roxas!" I try and call out, but for some reason, I don't think that it came out like it was suppose to.

"That's it!" the almost familiar voice cries out. "Seph, this Sora's cell phone. Demyx found it on the floor earlier and asked if I could give it back to him. Check the address book, and see if there is a number in there for Roxas."

"I don't think that this is appropriate right now, Riku." The growling voice that I can now identify as 'Seph' is standing right next to me, the blur moving in a very agitated manner, and right beside him is the familiar one, who I think is the one called 'Riku'. But why do I know these people? And why are all these little polka dots coming into my vision? They're sort of pretty.

"Sephiroth, let Riku try it. We'll keep trying to get him calmed down this way." The first voice is stern and I can see the blur to my left move up closer to me. The blackness is coming into my vision again, and it feels like I am being crushed. I hear some beeping, and I can't really tell if it is real or all in my mind.

"Roxas? My name is Riku. I work at Sora's rehab centre. I need you to talk to him, he's having a panic attack and we can't seem to get him calmed down. Alright. Oh, wow. Thank you so much, just hold on one moment." There is a pause, yet I can't help but try and pay attention since I heard my twin's name. I hope he is okay. "Seph, put the phone against Sora's ear. Vexen, can you make sure that there are no female nurses assigned to Sora's rounds? Apparently he has severe gynophobia." There is some commotion in the room before I feel something being pressed against the side of my head.

"Sora? Can you hear me?" Roxas? I know that voice just as well as I know my own.

"Roxy…" I trail off, content in knowing that my twin is there with me.

"Can you breathe for me, Sor? Slowly like Dr. Moreira taught us a long time ago. Remember? Breathe in, count to five, then breathe out and count to five. How about I count and you breath, then I breathe and you count, alright?" And although the words are making little sense, I know that it is my twin that is saying them and I know that I have to listen to him.

And as I take in a deep breath, I can hear Roxy counting, and from past experience, I know that I have to listen to him or else. And after only a few deep breaths, the spots in my vision begin to clear up, the darkness begins to push back just from the pure oxygen that is coming into the face mask. When did that get back there? I know that I took it off last night before bed.

The blurs begin to form back into humans, and now I can clearly see Riku and Sephiroth standing at my bedside, Dr. Vexen coming through the door, a surprised look covering his face. I have no idea what happened, the past little while just a giant black spot in my mind. In all honesty, I don't remember anything since I went to bed, passing out after only a couple of moments due to all the "excitement" of earlier on.

"You all right there, Sora?" Riku asks me, sightless eyes resting on my bedridden form. I just nod, continuing breathing on time to my brother's counts. With a shaky hand, I reach up and take my cell phone from Sephiroth, able to hold it against my ear on my own now.

As soon as I am holding the phone by myself, the older silver haired male pulls out a tiny flash light, and shines it right in my eyes. Roxas still is counting my breathing and thank my lucky stars that someone has thought to get a hold of Roxas. Sephiroth points in different directions for me to follow with my eyes, and silently I follow the commands. I have no idea what just happened, but I guess it must have been fairly serious if both Dr. Vexen and Sephiroth are here in the room. I've only been here for a little over a day, and I've already caused so much trouble. I bet they have never had someone who has been so high maintenance before.

"Sora?" Roxas whispers into the phone, his voice wavering slightly with fright. For me to have two panic attacks, or whatever this thing was, in a single day, I can't imagine what kind of effect it has had on Roxas.

"Thanks, Roxy. I think that you just saved my life." I reply, just as quietly, wincing as Dr. Vexen places a cold stethoscope on my chest.

A small sigh of relief comes through the receiver, and all I can think about is my twin. "You scared me there for a second. I was really worried that you weren't going to make it." My heart falls as soon as I hear him say this. The stethoscope is removed from my chest and Dr. Vexen writes something on his ever present clipboard. If Roxy thought that they were going to lose me, it must have meant that I had some how conveyed my pain to him once more.

"I'm sorry. All I know is that after I fell asleep, I think I had a dream of some sort, and then I can't remember anything except your voice until a few minutes ago." I look around the room, Sephiroth and Dr. Vexen were discussing something over next to the door, too quietly for me to hear, and Riku is leaning against the wall, staring off into space. Well, I at least I think it is space. I'm not exactly sure.

"Do you think that you'll be alright now?" I can hear the worry in my twin's voice, and I suspect he is worried about what will happen if he hangs up and goes back to sleep. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Sephiroth leave and close the door.

"Yeah. Don't worry; they're taking good care of me here. And I get to see you in less than two days. I should be okay until then. And I am so sorry to have scared you like that." I feel a constriction in my chest at the lie. My voice is still slightly airy from my panic attack, and I honestly can't tell what would have happened if it had gone on longer. But now I feel another emotion growing in my chest. Loneliness. I miss my brother.

"It's time to get some rest, Sora. Say goodbye." Dr. Vexen tells me in a friendly, yet stern voice as he puts a cuff on my arm and starts to pump it up.

"It's alright, Sora. I love you." Roxas tells me, and I can hear the breathing on the other end of the line finally calm down from the erratic pattern that I had noticed in my twin's voice earlier.

"I love you too, Roxy. I'll see you in a couple of days. And thanks." I get a quick farewell that I return before hanging up my cell. I wince slightly as the cuff becomes super tight, but watch intently as Dr. Vexen takes my blood pressure. Sephiroth re-enters the room, and I have no idea why he left.

"Are you feeling better now, Sora?" the blond doctor questions, writing some more things down on that clipboard. I nod in confirmation, hoping that there isn't actually something seriously wrong with me. "That's good news. Your heart actually stopped for a minute there. It started again on its own, but you are one very lucky young man." I'm not sure if I like just how blunt Dr. Vexen is being, in fact, it almost scares me.

"Will I be alright?" Even with the pure oxygen coming onto my face as a reminder, I need to concentrate on not panicking at my own words.

"Yes. You will be fine. We caught you in time. However, I am going to give you a sedative to help you get a good night sleep. You'll feel sleepy in just a few minutes, okay?" As if I had a say in the matter. He uses an alcohol soaked cotton ball to rub the inside of my elbow to disinfect the area. I feel the prick of the needle sink in, and stay there for a few moments before pulling out. And just like Dr. Vexen said, it doesn't take long to take effect. I lie back on my pillow and wait for the darkness to take me.

"Sleep well, Sora." The words from the sliver haired teen are the last thing I remember before falling into a dreamless sleep, a smile on my lips.

And here is the next one! Now you know what happened the night of Sora and Roxas' accident. And I am so sorry to everyone who is mad at me for giving Roxas that little bit of drama, and for making him sound like a slut…it really isn't going to be that way, I promise. So, please don't hurt me? And gynophobia is a real disease. And my cousin actually has it. There are only four females that he can handle being around, me, my twin, his mother and our grandmother. And after seeing Sora's reaction to Kairi's return in KHII, that's all I could think about.

Anyway, for everyone who keeps asking about when Roxas will be making his appearance, it will be some time very soon. I promise. And once again, a major thankies and smoochies to my twin for beta-ing this for me.

To the people who asked me what is it like to actually be a twin, I really don't think that I could describe it. We have a tendency to finish each others sentences and stuff, we have the same dreams, and it's like we can read each others minds most of the time. I've never been alone, and it's something that I wouldn't change for anything in the world.

Anyhoo, I think that I should have the next chapter out soon, I seem to be on a little bit of a roll now that school is over for this year. Only I am working like 60 hours a week, so who knows. No promises. Until next time, please remember to review!