Chapter 3: By My Master

Nothing but indifference to the recent events flew through my head as we boarded the elevator. I didn't feel like talking, contrary to my team's obvious opinion. I just wanted to get back to Industrial, nurse my wounds and forget this ever happened. Nothing will help me do that better than a bottle of Whiskey.

Giving Gidget permission to push the buttons, the doors close... but at the last minute are stopped by a hand blocking it from sealing. Reopening, Dakk walks in and they shut again. A silence complete with tension so thick you could cut it with that crazy chick's lightsaber.

"Listen," Dakk speaks, finally. "I know you two got off on the wrong foot-"

"Hardly the phrase I'd use." I spit back, surprised at my own anger. He moves to speak again, but I flash a hand in his face. "I don't feel like talking, so shove it."

"Fine." He listens to me, and shuts his trap. No one else says anything, so it's nothing but silence.

Until Gidget starts singing in that adorable yet irritating voice of hers.

"99 bottles of Jawa Juice on the wall,

99 bottles of Jawa Juice.

Take one down, pass it around,

98 bottles of Jawa Juice on the wall."

More awkward silence.

"98 bottles of Jawa Juice on the wall-"

"ALL RIGHT!" I yell in a sudden and brash manner, scaring everyone, including Gidget. I shoot her an apologetic look, then turn to Dakk. "What do you have to say?"

"You've got to understand: You shouldn't blame her. You don't know the life she's had."

"Must have really sucked considering how bitchy she turned out."

"Why'd she get all bent-out-of-shape when he mentioned her master?" Asked Scope, interrupting the conversation.

"She doesn't like to talk about him."

"Who was he?" Asked Alea. Dakk grew a smile on his face.

"Here's a hint..." He then proceeded to cover his mouth and make the weird breathing sounds. I didn't get at first, but then I remembered the news...

"Vader?" I asked, shocked beyond belief. "Vader was her master?"

"Yep."

"I imagine he wasn't always like that, then." Presumed Alea.

"She mentions occasionally that he was a nice guy and a bit like her in a sense. I don't know what he really looked like. You'll have to get that from Ahsoka. I doubt she'll tell you though. She won't even tell us."

"She got skeletons in the closet or something?" Asks Gidget.

"No, it's just the way she is. She's stubborn, but she has a good and spirited heart that's been torn to shreds by someone close to her."

"FINE!" I yell, again surprising everyone. I sigh through my teeth and mutter "I'll talk to her and try to work it out. No promises, though."

"That's all I ask." With that said, we redirect the elevator and head back up to the top floor. When we get there, we're welcomed with the sight of Cleone... but not Ahsoka.

"Where's Ahsoka?" Asked Dakk, confirming curiosity among the group.

"She left." Me and my group looked at her, then door. The only door, leading to the only elevator.

"How?"Asked Gidget, finally. Dakk tilted his head to an open window. I ran open and looked out, thankful that the rain had stopped. After squinting extensively, I managed to pick out a cleverly laid-out path that only some kind of Jedi can cross.

"Impressive." I say to myself.

"Where did she go?" questioned Gidget.

"Probably to drink herself numb." States Cleone.

"Really?" I say rather quickly.

"Yeah. She's been doing that a lot." She puts up a downcast look and turns away. "I better go get her."

"Wait. I'll go get her." Everyone looks at me with shock and/or confusion.

"Hey, I know how to talk to someone drunk. You're looking at someone who's been hammered more than an anvil." I walk to the door and close it before anyone says anything.

I guess me and this girl have more in common than I initially thought.

The bar is called the Green Moon. Not a very snazzy place, but I suppose you don't need atmosphere if your face down in dream killing juice.

Before I even step in the bar, I hear swinging music. Not dancing swinging, just music to give your mind something to focus on when your buzzed. Inside, it's just as loud. I recognize the band as the Astro Boys. A cover band that specializes in group harmonics and lyrics that make you want to kill yourself.

I love this band. I also love this song: Have a Drink on Me.

"Baby, you think I'm sad?

You think my minds on the brink?

Well, when I wanna kiss my troubles goodbye,

all I need is a good drink.

Baby, let's drink

To health, To life,

To an end to all this pointless strife.

No kids, no fight

Just you and me dancing under city lights.

So, Baby forget your problems

and have a drink on me.

Baby, forget your problems

and have a drink...

Oh, have a drink... on... me!"

At the end, it turns out the man drinks himself to death. Oh, how I love tragedies. That song should've topped the charts.

After asking around, I manage to find dear Ahsoka sitting at the bar, face down and holding a drink in hand, probably waiting for a refill. Wanna bet it's her last call?

I slowly move to a seat beside her, careful not to alarm her.

"Sand Whiskey, please." I urge the bartender. He complies without saying a word. As I look over Ahsoka, I can see the poor girl silently mouthing the lyrics to the song playing. Kind of sad. A former Jedi with that much power and ability, reduced to this.

"I take it you like this song?" I ask her. Shocked, she turns her head and manages to comprehend it's me. She shoots me a look of pure and utter malice.

"You...you are just spoiling for a fight, a-aren't you?" She slurs, clearly out of it.

"Darling, I just want to talk." I try to sound as sympathetic as possible, but she doesn't buy it. It's like she can read my mind.

Wait, can they do that?

"I don't... feel like t- *Hiccup* talking." She sounds almost like a mentally disabled child. "So... fuck off." She glares at me as if trying to kill me with her thoughts, then takes a swig of her drink.

"That's no way to talk to the person driving."

"Wha...?"

"Well, I am gonna drive you home."

"No, you aren't. I can drive myself."

"Like hell you can. Those Jedi reflexes of yours aren't gonna be much help here. You'll get your ass thrown in jail."

"See if I c-care. I'm already in jail. My whole life is just one big... cell." She takes another big sip.

"I know what that's like, darling."

"Stop calling me 'darling.'"

"I call all girls 'darling.'"

"Well, stop it." She snaps.

"Fine." Silence befalls us over the calamity of the bar. I turn and paint a serious face on.

"Now, come on. I'm taking you home."

"No, you're not!" She yells, or at least tries to.

"Fine. I won't argue, but I'm not one to admit defeat so easily either." I say. She looks away as I reach in a bag I laid beside me. I pull the mystery item out and lay it on the bar. She gives a quick look at it, then me.

"I do however like to compromise. I live by the phrase 'Speak softly and carry a big stick.' Only in my case, it's a big gun." I wisecrack.

"A steering wheel?" She asks, at first confused. Then her face twists into something I recognize and call 'the dim bulb brightening.'

"Yep." She finally realizes what it is and her face turns to shock.

"You ripped off the steering wheel of my speeder?"

"I figured it was the only way I could get you to talk to me."

"Talk? TALK?" Now she's pissed. "It's gonna be pretty hard to talk with a lightsaber shoved down your throat!" She immediately silences herself after saying that by putting her hands on her mouth. Probably because she thought she revealed her Jedi origin or something. At first I didn't think anyone paid attention, but it turns out her shrieking voice pierced the bar's atmosphere and totally killed the noise to the point where even the band stopped playing. Ahsoka stands there, hands on mouth and eyes wide open. We were gonna attract trouble, so I stood and spit out the first thing I thought of.

"Sorry, everybody. My wife's a little... bitter about the divorce. Kind of wasted, too." As I walk her out, I decide to milk it. Is it necessary? No. Is it fun? You bet your ass.

"I should be the bitter one, really. She gets the house and the car and all I get are the damn kids." As we're just about out, I see someone giving a look at us.

"What's your problem?" I ask him. "You got a problem with inter-specie marriage? Go to hell."

We finally get out and make it to her car. As I sit in the driver's seat, she angrily sits in the passenger's. She refuses to look at me. I shouldn't really blame her, but she's being immature. She acts like I'm her father and I busted her at a party where they do nothing but drink alcohol and fuck each other in the bedrooms.

"Will you relax? The steering wheel snaps on and off. It's some weird safety feature. Who the hell knows what it's for?" I tried to be funny, but apparently failed massively.

"What? Now you're not gonna talk to me?"

"I have nothing to say to you." She growls, much more sober sounding.

"Didn't sound that way in the bar."

She remains quiet. Okay... let's give sympathy a whirl.

"Listen, I'm sorry about earlier. If I'd known that he was your master-"

"You know?" That caught her attention. "Who told you?"

"Not important. Anyway, I wouldn't have known that the mention of your master would be utterly taboo for you and for bringing him up, I apologize." I try to say more, but I see her shaking in her seat and making quivering breathing sounds.

"Are you- Are you crying?" I ask in surprise.

"No!" Her voice shook and rose in tempo. Yep, she's crying.

"Don't worry. I won't tell anyone." I comfort. "Chances are it's probably the alcohol. And if it's not, you're probably just down because life's kicked your ass." Oh, maybe that was too blunt. "Sorry."

She tries to sound calm, but it sounds like she's having a hard time. "No, you're right. My life sucks. My life, heart and will to live was torn apart by my master, the one person I loved."

"You shouldn't blame yourself, though."

"When he turned, I did blame myself. Maybe I was a bad Padawan. Maybe I pissed him off. Maybe he didn't like my wild streak-"

Seriously?"You had a wild streak?" She ignored me and went on.

"Only after he killed the Jedi and practically obliterated my very way of life I realized that this was his own choice. I still felt like shit, though. My life had no purpose and I could barely process and control my emotions. Guess what that did to me." I couldn't figure it out, but she gave me hint when she made a gesture of spinning her finger around where her ear would be. Oh, she went insane. My eyes widened at that thought. "I committed myself to an asylum near here, where I did some... extensive thinking about what to do with my life."

"What did you do?"

"Like anyone killed by life would do: I went home. Back to Shili. Stayed for about 4 years, where I did some more thinking. I finally left when a friend of mine came and asked if I wanted to join the Rebellion." For the first time during the whole ride, she looked at me. Her cheeks were so wet, I thought it would cause the markings in her face to run as if they were some kind of wet paint. "You know, my friend was so used to my old personality, he barely even recognized me when he saw me."

"What was your old personality?" I queried.

"You know, the whole free-spirited, fiery, stubborn smart-ass." She spoke nonchalantly.

"You're able to pick yourself apart that easily? I'm impressed. You're a smart girl."

"You're just trying to cheer me up." Damn, she is smart.

"Is it working?"

"No." She leans against the window and gently plays with her head tails. After maybe a half a minute, she faintly speaks.

"I must have really changed, but not for the better. I don't like it."

I couldn't bring myself to say anything. Here I was driving a girl who, at first glance, was the coldest bad-ass I've ever seen. Now she was bearing her soul to me while drunk and in tears.

"Well?" She says loudly. "SAY SOMETHING!"

"Like what?" I ask, feeling more serious than I've ever felt. "I'm not a therapist!" I sigh, and improvise from here. "But if you really want my opinion: It's your life, live it the way you want to."

I don't think this is the answer she expected, because she looks disappointed. She leans into her seat, and the rest of the drive is in silence. Boy, you gotta love that silence, huh?

I'll admit she's not the first person to bear their emotions on me while drunk, but she's the first to really make me think. Think about what a total bitch life can be. I remember one day I'm so cracked on Deathsticks. A friend takes a look at me and almost looks ashamed. I wouldn't admit I needed help, so he just left me with a bit of advice. I'll never forget those words he said: Ad Crii do nan di pojo I nin dujo. Roughly translated, it means "When your life's in a pit, the only way you can go is up."

I gave up the drugs about a month later. Anyways, it seems like this girl's next direction is straight outta hell.

Upon reaching the warehouse, we both exit the Speeder after parking it and stare at each other over the top. I make the first move.

"I should go back to Industrial." I spit out, rubbing the back of my neck. "The others are probably waiting for me." As I walk to go find, or should I say "borrow" a ride, I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"Brutus..." I turn to see Ahsoka looking at me and... smiling. Not a sinister grin complete with vicious teeth, just an honest to goodness heartfelt smile. "Mission briefing's at 1300." She sings gently. "I hope you'll be there."

"I-I will." I stammer out, returning the favor by smiling back at her. She turns and walks to the warehouse, with a little swagger in her step. This makes me realize something...

"Hey!" I call out. "Sleep on your side! I don't want you to choke to death on your own vomit!"

She groans rather loudly, but it's okay. I think she knows that I care.

Just saw the first part of the new Star Wars the Clone Wars 3-parter. Part 2 looks bad-ass, but I have to wait a whole fucking week for it. High expectations are given.

Don't forget to review. If I can take the time to write this, you can take the time to let me know what you think about it.

Until then, don't drink and drive. You'll get your ass thrown in jail.