Another episode? Already? By the gods ye serve, or more appropriately, by the God I serve. Anyways, we go into our fist single-elimination challenge. So no, another pair won't be knocked out, just one more. Find out who will win, and who will fall, here on TOTAL DRAMA COLLEGE! *Yes, that is the official name*

"Last time on Total Drama College! The 13 contestants got conformable with an army of robotic bears. Everyone either kicked ass, or had their asses kicked. In the end, Heather won the season's first challenge, and is head of her own team, along with Duncan as the other head. However, in an unforeseen event, the winning team went to the voting ceremony, where we had a two for one sale on, not boobies like Izzy thought, but winners. Inaugural Champ Owen and Last season's runner up Noah were taken out on round one. Today, we go into our first school oriented challenge! Find out right here, right now, on TOTAL DRAMA REVENGE OF THE ISLAND…! "

"NO! NO NO! HE shouted. "I got it mixed up again. IT would help if they just aired the show already. I mean, we already finished filming it. Gosh, I mean here on TOTAL DRAMA COLLEGE!"

-Original Total Drama Theme, redone by the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus-

*Music starts in low, then slowly clocks in eerily* *While this goes on, the Camera shows the High-school, shooting through the doors, down the hall, past Chris McLain who is in a office chair, and to the pool."

*Drums bang hard* *Camera then dives into the pool, Showing Owen swimming with a blow-up alligator*

Parents! I'm Doing Fine! *Camera jumps out of the water to show Trent smiling while wearing swimming trunks, diving in as Gwen watches while sitting under an umbrella*

IN this game of life, Your advice is on my mind! *Camera pans left, showing Duncan watching the incident with raised eyebrows*

When you asked me what I wanted to be, I'm telling you, I am now famous! *Camera shoots toward the track, where Eva and Izzy run side-by-side, Noah and Owen cheering in the bleachers*

I'm finally getting closer to the sun *Alejandro corners Heather against the lockers, talking to her about what appears to be strategy*

Although the competition's killing my chance to have already won! *In the Mess Hall, Chef takes some several years old sushi out of the freezer*

Everything I'm doing, the obstacles are still in my way! *Tyler and Lindsey look at Chef with wide eyes, then at each other in fear.*

Yet I've got to get their one day! *In the computer room, Beth shows Ezekiel how to hack a online game*

Because I shall soon be Famous! *Sierra updates her twitter blog, a framed picture of Cody sitting next to her. She wipes a tear from her eye as she looks at the image*

*Rapid Repeated beating in the background*

I Shall soon be famous! *Camera shoots into the hallway, showing the map on the ceiling*

I am Now Famous! *Shoots into Principal's office, where Chris sits in a chair, holding a plate filled with report cards*

I Shall Soon be Famous! *Camera zones out a bit, showing the TDC contestants looking at him eagerly as Chef in a female secretary outfit walks up, telling Chris something*

*Scratchy Demonic voice* I AM NOW FAMOUS! *Rapid drum roll, then sudden beat at the end* *As this happens, the camera zones way out, showing that over the front door of the school building, a sign saying 'Total Drama College' Can be seen*

-TDC-TDC-TDC-

"Wake up maggots!" Chef called form behind the counters of the Mess Hall. The 11 contestants shifted about in their sleeping bags. The cook shook his head, and with a spatchula, hit a buzzer. The sound woke everyone up excpet Heather, and they all grabbed their ears.

Heather removed the cucumber slices from her eyes. She shook her head, and cracked her joints, then stood up. "What's for breakfast Chef?"

"Ancient Sushi, Edible Socks, and a bit of Mangos!"

Duncan and Gwen exchanged glances. "Um wow. Did Heather just turn a new leaf?"

-Heather's POV-

"I know, Very uncharacteristic of me to act so kindly. However, everyone odd numbered year has been my best one. Season 1 I finished 3rd, and Season 3 gave me a win. Why shouldn't this year give me another great result, like for instance…another win? So, to make sure the streak stays alive, I'm going to act a big more like Al. Nice on the outside, and still demonic on the inside. We'll see how far it takes me."

-Normal POV-

As everyone, still clad in their sleepwear, lined up for their food, Izzy kicked a ceiling panel out of the ceiling, landing in Ezekiel's sushi. Her head poked out of the hole. "Guys! I've seen the entire school already from up here! It's just amazing!"

"Great. DO you know what we're doing today?" Tyler shouted up. Izzy shook her head to the negative.

"Great." Duncan grumbled, getting whacked on the head by Chef's spatchula. "No mumbling in my Mess Hall!"

"Fine then." He remarked, rubbing his Mohawk. That was when the doors opened, and Chris McLean walked in. "Good day contestants, or should I say, students?" He only got stares in return. "Today's subject is going to be…"

"How to survive a Columbine shooting?" Duncan prodded, only to get whacked on the head again harder. "OW!"

"Close, But not quite. Today, we are going to definitely be getting dirty. It's Science as the subject today!"

Sierra sighed. "If only Cody were here, He could get us a good grade in that."

Heather seethed, but patted Sierra on the shoulder. "It's okay now Sierra. I feel with you for your loss."

Eva raised an eyebrow. That was when her edible sock stood up in her plate, and grabbed her by the wrist. "OW! OW! Get this thing OFF OF ME!" She shouted, wrestling with it.

"Hey Senior Chef, just how edible is that sock?" Alejandro asked.

"Just as old as the dinosaurs, and with just as bad of a temper." They were interrupted by a series of loud poundings from Eva's fist into the sock, killing it.

"I want you in the Lab in 15 minutes. Over and out!"

-Lab-15 minutes later-

Everyone showed up on time, fully dressed, and grinding the last bit of sleep out of their eyes, and staring at the room intently. Desks with textbooks, beakers, Bunsen burners, and even a hanging skeleton was seen in the room. Izzy crawled out through another ceiling panel.

"In most high schools, and even lower levels of college, you all will find out that there is a nice thing known as dissection. I would have dissected a human being, but sadly, I couldn't get my lawyers to give me the go ahead. So, to settle, we'll be dissecting a Zebra."

"Aren't zebra's endangered?" Alejandro quizzed.

"Yes. Indeed they are. That is why this is such a special challenge. Both teams have to find the spleen in their Zebra first. Whoever does, gets a head start on the next challenge. Now, because the Textbooks won last week's challenge, they go second, and the Mail goes fist."

"The who won and the what goes first?" Lindsey asked, scratching her head.

"Oh yeah. Team one, Headed by Heather, I have christened as the Screaming Textbooks!" A green circle with an open book appears over that team's head as their symbol. "Team two is the Killer Mail. I was going to use that for Revenge of the Island, but again, I didn't get confirmation." A red circle with a envelope on it appears over the 7 person team. "Now…begin!"

-Screeching Textbooks-

Heather passed around the dissection knives, and everyone pulled out some masks to put over their face to shield their mouths and nostrils. "Ready?" She lightly pressed the knife just below the left side of the shoulder on the dead beast. A geyser of blood sprayed out and smacked her shirt. "UGHHH! How dare it!"

Once the fountain of blood stopped, Beth posed the question on if they were ready or not. "READY!" Ea exclaimed, discarding her knife and grabbing a section of skin just below it's ribcage, and tore. The intestines spilled out.

"Wow. Why did I think of that?" Izzy remarked.

"Okay! Great job everyone! Now we just need to get it!"

Blood then began to pool out of the dead mammal, and it covered most of the organs in a stew like mixture. "Ewww. Anyone have surgical gloves?" Beth posed.

-Beth's POV-

"It's so nice to be on a team with only girls, even if there is Heather there. I mean, at least we all can talk about relatively the same thing. Right?"

-Normal POV-Killer Mail-

Duncan held up a chainsaw. "SCREW THIS! LET'S DIG IN!" The thing turned on.

"Duncan! Don't!" Gwen screamed, shielding her face with her hands.

"Bromigo, I agree with Gwen here as…" Duncan cut in anyways, and the geyser spewed up, hit the ceiling, and fell down onto a kissing Lindsey and Tyler who were on a chair behind them. The two hardly even noticed the red liquid on their bodies.

Sierra shook her head negatively, and as Duncan pulled the saw away, she and Ezekiel reached in and strated feeling about for the liver. "I think the spleen is located under the liver."

"Yah. I agree with her there." The 3 contestants that were still paying attention looked at them strangely, as before long they had everything waist up of theirs inside the carcass. "I'm not seeing it dudes!"

"Someone, Flashlight!" Sierra called out, sticking her hand out and opening and closing it rapidly to show her need. Gwen handed her a flashlight, and it turned on. "WHOA! Dude's, it' like a whole new world!"

"Found it…the liver at least." Sierra remarked.

"The spleen?" Alejandro asked, looking over the bloodied animal body.

"Can't find it."

"Poor animal." Alejandro knelt beside the head of the animal, and put his mouth next to it's ear. "I feel for you. You were murdered brutally for no reason, and now you have your organs poked around in."

-Screeching Textbooks-

Using a pair of kitchen tongs, Beth and Heather were poking around in the stew, trying desperately to find themselves a zebra spleen. They pulled up a liver, followed by a large intestines, but still no spleen.

"Guys! You should totally drink this stuff! It's like so good!" Izzy remarked, her lips covered with blood. The three female teammates looked at her shockingly, and she hiccupped. As she did, the spleen fell out of her mouth and landed in Eva's hand. "Um…wow. Chris! We found it!"

Chris walked over. "Indeed. Now, someone get this crazy girl some antibiotics before she dies on us!" That was when the eyes rolled into the back of the redhead's sockets, and she collapsed.

"While Izzy recuperates in the nurses office by Nurse Hatchet, we're going to continue our challenges. The last part of our science oriented challenge is going to be about, you guessed it, rock strata. According to some scientists, those rocks were laid down over millions of years. Under others, they were laid down under one or two sudden world-wide catastrophes. The Killer Mail will defend position A, while the textbooks, Position B. Whoever does the best defense gets to be spared from elimination. The one that doesn't, they will head to the elimination ceremony." Beth raised her hands. "Yes Beth?"

"Will the winner go to another voting ceremony again?"

"Nope. Not today. We are contorting back to the old rules." Chef pushed a tray by with a bunch of various rocks and images of the grand canyon to the teams. "And…begin!"

-Screeching Textbooks-

"So eh…what are we to do exactly? I know we have to prove this evolution thing, but… I don't really believe in it."

"To bad. I think most of us don't believe in that kind of thing." Duncan sneered at the prairie boy.

"Indeed. We need to take as much information as possible from them."

Tyler reached in and pulled out the image of the grand canyon. "I don't get it." He stated. "Wouldn't all these be more of a smooth transition?"

"Tyler, stop blowing holes in our story!" Gwen shouted. "We don't have to much time."

"Allow me." Gwen looked at Alejandro and stared at him with a raised set of eyebrows. "Allow you to what?"

"Concot a killer rebuttal to their seemingly pointless creation statement."

"…Fine. Take it." Gwen remarked, handing the materials to the Hispanic.

"Mi amour." He remarked, and pulled out a magnifying glass, looking deep at the slab of granite he picked up. Unknowingly, they were under watch by a jealous female.

-Heather's POV-

"Was that, flirting? Alejandro flirting with Gwen? Oh yes it was. I Would know. Who was it that flirted Alejandro all the way up to the final two to dump him off the side of a volcano. And now he's flirting…with weird crazy Goth Girl! I think that if he doesn't go…he needs a reminder on just whom he serves." She took her purple 10 inch heel off of her left foot, and smacked the tip of it into her open left right hand.

-Normal POV-Killer Mail-

"So…how do we figure this out?" Beth asked. "I'm a full faith believer in the creation thing, but I mean, science and God never seemed to mix well."

"Allow me." Eva remarked, yanking a rock from the pile, and crushing it with her hand. "Pumice. IF that had been laid down millions of year ago, it wouldn't act like a weak, flimsy drying sponge. It would be hard, and totally full of mixed minerals." She grinded her fist together, the pieces dropping out.

Heather pulled out the image of the Grand Canyon. "Furthermore, The K-T boundary that I see here is only found in two places, asteroids and deep in the earth's surface." Eva and Beth looked at Heather with shocked faces, jaws wide open. "With that said, coupled with the erratic burying of fossils not from a super tremor like what would happen in an asteroid impact, but rather form the earth splitting and shooting upwards form below, as if huge geysers erupted." Then the World Tour winner looked at her two teammates. "What? I had to attended a Church once."

-Eva's POV-

"Smug, self centered know it all. Despite the fact that she seems to have the information we need, she is way to much of a female Gestapo. I say that as soon as I can, we sink a challenge and throw her out, like she did to me all those years back." Her teeth gritted as she remembered the events on the Island.

-Normal POV-Screeching Textbooks-

"Okay, Duncan, you've got anything yet?"

Duncan pulled his head away from the paper, smiling smugly at Gwen. "Of course I do." He then handed her the piece of paper he had been writing on. She grabbed it, and with interest the gothic female began reading the paper.

"Duncna, through the entire thing, you only say 'Evolution is true because Darwin said that Evolution is true because Darwin said…'."

"I know. One killer Fact, right?" He asked sarcastically.

"Duncan, surely you don't honestly think that we can win with just this?"

"Hey, I never really cared on where our origins lie plainly. Let's face it, we are in the here and now, and the then and there doesn't matter, does it?"

She sighed, and walked over to Alejandro, sitting on the other side of the desk, writing away quite rapidly. "You've got anything yet?"

"Indeed Masamita. I have a series of 30 facts that should be enough to win us over."

"Good, Because some people didn't have what it took to do it." Gwen removed the stack of papers from beside him. "You could write a killer essay." IN the background, one could see Heather run up to Duncan, whisper something in his ear, and back off.

-Duncan's POV-

"So what. You honestly think that Gwen is flirting with Ale-crap-o? After all that he's done. Nuh-unh. Not buying it. I think that Heather is quite paranoid to be honest. Besides, you can't tell me that the two would even be compatible. Besides, his abilities are little more then challenge winners. Once we get to team disbandment, he's gone as far as I care."

-Normal POV-Killer Mail-

"So, you really think that this will win us the safe spots?" Beth asked inquisitively. Heather yanked the paper out from Beth's hand. "Darn right it will. There's nothing in it to make me think otherwise. Besides, Chris knows what he's dealing with."

Just a good 30 minutes later, and Chris McLean was sitting with Chef Hatchet behind a table, both holding bags of popcorn. "Okay teams. I hope that you all are ready. Because frankly, I'm in the mood for some invincibility-winning material. First up is the Screeching Textbooks." The two clanked the bags of popcorn together, some of it spilling out onto the floor.

Alejandro stepped onto the stage, and Tyler pointed a large spotlight at him. "Today, I am here to debate on the scientific side of the Evolution/Creation Debate. Frankly, and let's face it here, it's redundant and absurd to think that there is a 'God' that rules over us all. The notion flat out is insupportable, as there is no scientific evidence to explain it. This 'God' would have been all over our modern day lives, controlling our every move and preventing us from doing anything but be reminded that he exists. Such a being would be, in essence, a un-removable Dictator. As this is not the case, allow me to proceed on."

"As you can see here, looking at this…" And that was when a loud buzzer went off. "Okay Al! Your time to shows your side is up."

"We were timed?"

"Yeah. I just didn't feel like telling any of you. Next up, The Killer Mail!"

Heather stepped onto stage, smirking at Alejandro as he walked off. Eva punched Tyler's lights out, and then took his big spot-light and aimed it at the Queen-Bee. "Thank you very much Chris…Now, Before I start, I want to give a solemn 'thank you' to Chris McLean who…"

-Heather's POV-

"Naturally, when I found out about the 45 second gap timing, I realized I'd have to condense my speech, and throw all the facts out in the place of…Flaterry."

"…And due to his grent benevolence, This man named Christopher McLean choose my team, weak as it already was, to propose a veiwpoint that was quite easy to understand frankly." The buzzer went off, and Chris stood up.

"That, by far, was the best pro-creation theory description I've ever heard of! Folks, It's off to the Elimination ceremony for you Textbooks! While in the meantime, the Mail get to enjoy a 4 star desert served by Chef Hatchet himself!" Chef frowned at the prospect of having to do more work, but he trudged off to the kitchen none the less.

-Elimination Ceremony-

"Seven of you. Frankly, Any of you could be eliminated, and I think it would help the team. Alejandro didn't do anything helpful in the time allotted." The Hispanic gritted his teeth. HE hadn't been informed by that two-faced show host!

"Duncan, all you came up with is a proposed 'fact' which did nothing but loop. I expected worse from you." The Total Drama Action winner opened his knife, spun it around in his hand before grabbing it sharply, an angered look etched on his face.

"Gwen, as a team leader, you fail. Sierra, you did positively nothing beneficial to your team." Gwen and Sierra stayed mum, knowing that the man was right.

"Ezekiel, you are frankly the cockroach that we can't get rid of! A one-man infestation! Face it! You HAVE to go! You sexism will get you nowhere!"

A retort was Chris' answer. "At least for the second straight season I won't be eliminated first!"

"And For Tyler and Lindsey. Tyler…Lindsey? TYLER LINDSEY! STOP SUCKING FACE AND PAY ATTENTION!" The two were still wrapped in the other's arms, but they turned and looked at Chris for the first time all day, Zebra blood still staining their hair. "You two did nothing but kiss, Kiss, and kiss some more! If it was a dual elimination, I'd cast my two votes for you guys." The two of them shrugged. They could be eliminated, and it wouldn't matter to them. They were living in a nice castle in Toronto, with some money to spare still, not to mention that their families are rich."

"I have the votes here. Gwen, Sierra, and Duncan received no votes at all." They caught the report cards with a smile.

Chris shifted the half-smile on his face. "Tyler…And Lindsey! Safe with no votes." The two of them caught the report cards with their hands as they went back to kissing.

"And that leaves two. Alejandro and Ezekiel. Ezekiel…and Alejandro!" The prairie boy and the Columbia native exchanged glances. "Zeke…or Al?" Al shivered at being called Al once more. He had been called 'AL' enough times in his life!

"And the final report card goes to…Alejandro!" Alejandro exhaled in relief as Zeke was left without cards. "Ezekiel, what do you have to say for yourself?"

"It's a good thing I'm going. I need to get back to the farm anyhow." He chuckled, and walked out the door. Just before it shut, he poked his head back through. "Besides, being with My family I discovered was more important then being with a million dollars. AND, I need to brush up on my hunting skills. So I won't be your one-man infestation this year Chris. I heard that maybe Dawn or Zoë will fill that role."

The door shut, and the homeschooler went outside, braving the cold as the bus pulled up. He smiled with satisfaction as he threw his suitcase and sleeping bag in the bus, and climbed aboard. The doors shut behind him, and the Bus went off.

Back in the elimination room, as the six members of the Screeching Textbooks left the building, Chris turned to face the camera. "Today folks, Ezekiel was eliminated, and we found out that because I said so, Creationistic values are true! Tune in next time to see who gets the boot next, right here, on TOTAL

DRAMA

COLLEGE!"

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