Poland was hangin' with his pony, Rainbow Dash.
'Yo yo yo, RD, the fuck're we gon' do?' Poland said, flashing gang signs.
Rainbow Dash slapped him in the face, smoking a cigarette and wearing awesome!sunglasses. 'QUIET, BOY. I DO THE COOL SHIT 'ROUND HERE.'
Poland whimpered, but he kind of enjoyed it. 'So, like, what are we going to do?'
'I heard that America is totally gay and shit,' Rainbow Dash said. 'We should totes spy on him!'
'YEAH! I'LL GET THE CAMERA!'
Later, Rainbow Dash was setting up the camera in front of America's bedroom window, into which Poland was staring.
'Fuck yeah, this shit gon' be goooooood,' Poland said.
'THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU, BOY.'
'SHUT UP, ICH BIN CONCENTRATING,' someone said next to them.
They turned, and there was Germany at the next window over, also with a camera.
'Germany? Like, what are you doing here?' Poland asked.
'I'm not waiting to film some super hawt awesome American porn,' Germany said. He totally wasn't, you guys. Why don't you believe me? WELL FUCK YOU!
Just then, Italy appeared. 'Ve~ Germany, what are you doing?'
'Go away Italy. I'm doing research.'
'YEAH! RESEARCH ON AMERICA'S COCK!' Poland shouted. He was loud enough for America, who was all the way across the ocean, to hear.
'What was that?'
'NEVER MIND WHAT THAT WAS! NOW TAKE OFF YOUR BLOODY PANTS!'
Anyway, so Germany, Italy, and Rainbow Dash gaped at Poland, jaws dropped. The children who had heard him were sold to Spain.
'... THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?' Rainbow Dash said. 'GTFO, FUCKWAD!'
So Poland dejectedly walked away. In a few seconds, it was nighttime. He wandered through the city, ignoring every movie ever made.
'Psst. Come here,' a voice said as he passed a dark alley.
Poland stared into the alley. 'Me?'
'Da vi!'
'Don't keep us waiting, hon hon!'
Poland was pretty much just made of stupid that day and walked into the alley, where he was assualted by Russia and France in every way imaginable.
Unbeknownst to them, Germany was filming the whole time...