Blaine did not go back to sleep that morning.
The doctors and nurses were called it once Burt had ordered them to. The family stayed huddled by Kurt's bed, wiping away their tears and staring at the body of the boy who was breathing and moving about not too long ago. Blaine kept on glancing up at the clock above Kurt's bed. One minute. Five minutes. Ten minutes. An hour until the hospital staff was finally called in.
Dr. P. Avery, Katie, and a few other nurses came into the room, giving the usual "My condolences" and "I'm so sorry," to the weeping family. For the entire time, Blaine still held on to Kurt's hand. It was still warm. He remembered how he bravely took Kurt's hand on their first date and lead him to the ferris wheel. He remembered the feeling of those hands on his chest during their first kiss, in his hair and down his back during their first time, and the way they felt as they danced together on their wedding night. It all seemed like ten years ago to Blaine.
Now that Kurt was gone, there was probably going to be some sort of funeral or memorial for him, something Blaine couldn't stand thinking about. The doctors were going to roll Kurt away on his bed and into another room where he could get cleaned up, but just before they left Blaine stopped them.
He put his face very close to Kurt's, just breathing and trying to memorize every one of his features. His nose, lips, eyelashes, hair, forehead, cheeks, chin and ears. All so beautiful. Blaine was not ready to let the doctors take Kurt away yet. This could be the last time he'd ever see his husband's body. His breathing started to get quicker as the tears re-appeared for what seemed like the millionth time during these past few weeks.
Burt was going to try and gently pry Blaine away, but Dr. P. Avery stopped Burt politely.
"It's alright," the doctor said. "This is normal, this happens a lot with other patients. Let Blaine take his time, we have all morning."
So that's what Blaine did. He just kept his face next to Kurt's, kissing every part of his face he could.
"You don't have to suffer anymore, baby," Blaine whispered. There was a part of him that was telling him that Kurt could still hear him. He could feel his lingering scent and presence still around him in the air. "It doesn't have to hurt anymore."
Blaine hummed a lullaby that his mother used to sing to him when he was cranky. He tried to swallow the lump forming in his throat, but it just came back.
"You're so beautiful," Blaine whispered again to Kurt. "You've always been so beautiful. I'm sorry it took us so long to get together. We could've had so much time."
He was just waiting. Waiting for Kurt to open his eyes, waiting for him to breathe and say something, ready to kiss Blaine and hold him. But it didn't happen. It was a very long time, the doctors and nurses waited patiently. It was about 5:38 am. But no one needed to be anywhere else except here.
"I'm going to keep all my promises to you," Blaine cooed as he stroked Kurt's hair. "I'm going to do all the things we wanted to do when we got older. Thank you, Kurt. Thank you so much for everything you've taught me. The world will be a much darker place without you, sweetheart."
Blaine didn't need to say I love you again, because he knew that Kurt knew it. And he was loved back. He unwillingly pulled away from the bed, allowing the doctor's to take his Kurt away and out of the room. There was a big, rectangular space where Kurt's bed used to occupy. Blaine always hated seeing Kurt in that bed, but now that it was gone, he wanted it back more than anything. Blaine turned to Burt and started to cry.
Burt immediately wrapped his son-in-law in a giant hug, muffling Blaine's sobs and patting him on his back. Carole also lay a gentle hand on Blaine's shoulder, while Finn just sort of stood and watched.
"I know, Blaine," Burt tried to comfort the boy. "He was my boy, too. He was everyone's. I loved him just as much as you did."
There was a pause, Blaine still sniffling into Burt's shoulder. Burt felt a sense of emptiness being slightly filled, but he could not play pretend. Blaine was not Kurt, he was not his little boy. He loved Blaine as his own son now, and he treated him the same way as Kurt, but he still was not the Kurt Hummel.
"He's not gone, you know," Burt murmured. "Being dead doesn't mean he's gone. He'll never be gone, that kid's too stubborn to leave us behind."
"I miss him already," Blaine sniffed.
"I miss him too, kiddo," Burt sighed. "We all do."
Later that day, Blaine and Finn grew very tired, but there was no way they were going to sleep. They'd called everyone in the glee club, asking them to come to the hospital so they could give them the news in person.
When all nine members of the glee club arrived in the parking lot, they met Blaine and Finn outside the doors. There was a nice little area covered by some trees where people could go eat lunch or read a book or something. That's where they all met.
"What's wrong, boys?" asked Mercedes nervously.
"Is it bad news?" Puck asked.
Blaine could only nod. Everyone tensed, and they all seemed to be holding onto one another as the news was delivered. Even though Blaine tried to speak, the words came out as silence, so Finn tried for him.
"Kurt passed away this morning, you guys," Finn's voice cracked on his step-brother's name. "It was this morning. Blaine and I were there. I'm so sorry, everyone."
The words passed away hit them like a train. The group wanted to faint. They're best friend was gone. He died this morning while everyone was sleeping, cozy in their own beds and pajama's while Kurt suffered one last time. Everyone began to cry.
"No," Rachel's small figure began to tremble. Finn wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close as she sobbed. "No. This can't be."
"I'm sorry, Rachel," Finn said. "It is."
Everyone took turns hugging one another and crying into each other's shirts.
"My baby," Mercedes was probably crying the most. "That was my baby."
"I can't believe the last time we saw him was yesterday," Artie said. "It felt like such a long time ago."
"Our best friend," Brittany covered her face with her hands, crying into them while Santana rubbed her back, wiping some stray tears away with her fingers.
"Blaine," Quinn came up to Blaine and hugged him, Blaine hugged back, squeezing his friend and telling himself it'd be okay. Who was he kidding?
"I'm so sorry, Blaine," Quinn kissed his cheek. "I know how much he meant to you. I loved him too."
"I know," Blaine said. That was all he could really say.
The friends were devastated at the loss of their companion. It didn't feel like the New Directions anymore. People always quit in glee club, but it was usually for a few days or so before they gave in and went right back to laughing with friends. But Kurt wasn't coming back. A piece was missing permanently. When someone dies, a part of you can die as well, even if you're still breathing.
They could do it. They were strong and they could do it.
No, they could not, actually.
Maybe in time they'd heal, but for now, they needed to be broken. They needed to cry, needed to let all the pain out just so it could be replaced with more pain. Sometimes pain was a good thing. It was better to feel pain than nothing. Imagine living a life without emotions. It would be pretty bland, but humans are weak, foolish creatures and emotions are a big part of being one. Blaine didn't want to feel pain, though. No one did.
"I don't even know what I'm supposed to do," Blaine sighed. He sat down on a nearby bench with Rachel outside. Rachel was probably one of Kurt's closest friends in the glee club. They had their disagreements, but in the end they stuck together like glue. Rachel followed Blaine outside of the area underneath the trees when he felt like it was too much to handle, seeing everyone cry.
"You're not required to do anything, Blaine," Rachel said, smoothing down her dress and sitting down next to Blaine.
"I don't feel...like it was enough. Everything I did for him."
"That's absolutely insane, Blaine," Rachel gasped. "I can't believe you're saying that. What happened to Kurt was unstoppable, not even the doctors could save him."
"I wished I did," Blaine's voice was starting to get high and squeaky again. He swallowed hard, clearing his throat. He buried his face in his hands, massaging his temples.
"I promise you," Rachel placed her dainty hand on his trembling shoulder. "You did save him. In so many different ways, you saved him."
"What do you mean? He's gone."
"You became his friend when he was getting bullied, you made him feel special and loved while he was stuck in that hospital. You made all his dreams come true, Blaine. You don't even know how much he loves you."
"I miss him so much," Blaine's voice was shaky. "It hasn't even been one day yet and I miss him more than anything. It feels like someone punched me really hard and the throbbing just won't go away."
"I know," Rachel rubbed Blaine's back soothingly, kind of like how Kurt used to do when he was comforting Blaine. "I miss him too. I wish I could have seen him one last time."
Rachel was crying now, too, big tears leaking from her chocolate brown eyes. "I wanted to go to NYADA with him. I got so mad at him when he told me he wasn't applying to college at all. I'd do anything to go back and take back what I said."
The two just sat there on the bench, not saying anything to each other but soaking in each other's comfort. Silent tears continued to stroll down their faces, and the occasional sniff or whimper was released. Suddenly, there was a very warm gust of wind that swept through their hair and ruffled Rachel's dress. The wind came out of nowhere, slightly starting them as it blew a few dead plants by their feet. The wind also caused some pink flower petals from a blossom tree nearby to shower Rachel and Blaine in the rosy plants.
Blaine heard the sound of Kurt's voice at the back of his mind.
"Did you feel that?" Rachel asked. Apparently, she wasn't the only one who felt the enormous amount of happiness and warmth as the wind blew on by. It lasted very short, however, and like a shooting star, it was gone.
"Yes," Blaine replied. They didn't look at each other, they just stared at the mixture of dead leaves and pink petals at their feet and on their laps. "I did."
"Blaine," Rachel whispered. "I felt Kurt."
"So did I," Blaine turned to her.
They looked at each other for a long, long time. Maybe this was Kurt's way of trying to let his friend and husband know that he wasn't lost. He was not gone forever. He was still here, his heart still beating somewhere, his voice still singing somewhere.
"Burt was right," Blaine shook his head, chuckling. "Kurt is too stubborn to leave us behind for good."
Author's note: Don't worry guys, I'm not going to change this into a ghost story. In A Walk to Remember, Landon said he could feel Jamie around him even though he could not see her. I want to make this an important part of these last few chapters, because even though some people think that no, you cannot be reached from those in the after life, I still think that it doesn't mean your loved one is gone for good.